“Trust me. Nothing beats a tracking turtle.”
“I can beat pretty much anything if I have a large enough club.”
Liverioso slipped off the Shambler from behind her. “Leth’s go.” He moved beside his partner, who was now leading his Shambler and keeping an eye on the turtle.
“Why can’t you just pick the thing up and we ride in that direction and get there in a quarter of the time?”
“Because it might be hard to see.”
Chéri dismounted her Shambler, “That’s just absurd. If it’s hard to see how can it be any place that we can get into?”
Semfeld turned to look at the Gnomess. “Listen, I don’t understand how a tracking critters spells work. All I know is that they do pretty much all the time. So lets’ just follow the turtle.”
The turtle turned his head and nodded at them. He looked forward and continued at his slow pace.
“I don’t see how...”
The trio stepped into a clearing. Sitting in the middle of it was a ramshackle shack. The turtle made straight for it.
“Well, that’s just absurd.”
“Like I said, Chéri; I don’t know how they work, just that they do.”
They moved closer to the shack. It seemed to be made of fallen logs with a rough-hewn door set on one side. The roof seemed to be several spit logs lashed together with ropes.
“What a dump.”
Semfeld and Liverioso turned to look at Chéri. So did the turtle. “What did you expect in the middle of the forest?” Asked Semfeld.
“Yeah; a cottage made of candy?” Added Liverioso.
The turtle just shook its head.
Chéri moved to the front door. “Should we knock?”
Semfeld opened his mouth, then closed it. “I have no idea. I suppose we could just go right on in. I can’t imagine anyone living out here.”
Liverioso looked around the clearing. “What’re we going to do with the Shamblers?”
“Bring them inside as well. The last thing we need is a couple of Shamblers drawing anyone or anything’s attention,” said Semfeld.
“I agree,” said Chéri. She lifted the latch on the door and pushed it open. Musty air pushed out of the shack. “I don’t think anyone has lived here for a long time.” She turned to look at Liverioso. “You got a spell to make some sort of light?”
“Do I?!”
“Here we go.”
Liverioso stepped away from the pair. “Lady and Gentleman. I greet you thith evening from the dark of the foreth. The dark that will soon be light.”
Semfeld clapped. With a sigh, Chéri clapped twice- that was the most either magician had gotten out of her.
Liverioso tilted his hands back and forth. With a flourish, he drew Garibaldis’ wand. “Light for the dark!” He bent down.
Chéri clapped again. Usually bows meant that the show was over. She was hoping that it was, anyway.
Liverioso picked up a fist-sized rock. “Water from rocks? Child’s play. Any hack can do that. Make it a pigeon? That’s an old birthday party trick.” He raised the rock up to chest level and arms-length. Holding the wand similarly, he passed the wand over the stone. “Light from a rock. Oh yes. You will thee it happen right before your eyes!”
Crystalis Projectus
Lightus All Around Us!
He intoned.
He moved the rock to his lips and blew through it as if it were a horn. As he did, a glow began to grow from the center of it. With each breath, the glow got brighter. Soon, Semfeld and Chéri could see their own shadows. Liverioso took a deep breath and prepared to blow into the stone again.
“That’s plenty, Liv; otherwise everyone’ll know we’re here,” cautioned Semfeld.
Chéri clapped. “That’s the most amazing thing I’ve seen you do. Really.”
Liverioso beamed - almost as bright as the stone. “Thankths!” He tossed the shining rock to Chéri.
Chéri caught the rock. It was cool to the touch. It had dimmed slightly when it was tossed. She paused, then brought it up to her lips. As she blew into it, the light grew with intensity. “Really, really nice.” She moved back to the door. She leaned in, rock out in front of her. “It looks as bad in here as it does on the outside,” she remarked. She stepped into the shack, boards creaking under her feet.
“Real nice, Amazing Liverioso.”
Liverioso took a deep bow.
“Let’s get inside before anyone notices were here.” He looked at the two Shamblers. “If you two need to make a dump, now is the time to do it.” He swatted the rump of one of the beasts. It obliged by getting rid of a large amount of pellets that at one time were plants and flowers it had passed on the day’s walk. The other beast followed suit.
“Good Shamblers!” Semfeld patted the Shambler’s rump again. He looked at his partner. “Let’s get inside.” He took his mount’s reins and pulled him to the door. After only a couple of tries, he had his Shambler inside the shack. Liverioso was not far behind him.
“So what’re we looking at in here?” Asked Semfeld.
Chéri was moving around the room with the glowing rock in her hand. “Well, there’s not much here. An old bed that’s completely used up, just the boards are left. No windows and only one door. It’s either the perfect hiding place, or the ultimate trap.”
“Well, in that case, I think we’re set!” Said Liverioso. He moved the animals to the far corner of the room. He tucked the reins into a crack in the wood. “Stay.”
The turtle finally made it to the door of the shack- less than five minutes from when it first started. It looked around, appraising the room, pleased with what it had constructed. In a twist that even Fate couldn’t fathom, Semfeld had once again managed to pick up the one stone within a thousand day’s walk that was an entrapped Djinn. All powerful, it had languished in the stone for well over five hundred years. Unable to move, or even lure someone near to rub it, it sat in stony silence hoping.
Until.
Until a certain Magician had picked him up and transformed him into a turtle. He was free of the bonds of the rock, and since the Magician had picked him up, he was now bound to him. Being a turtle, however, he was unable to convey any of the duties and responsibilities (there were quite a few) that came with owning a Djinn. The request to ‘find’ a safe place for the night within walking distance had been taken as a request for a wish. The Djinn complied as the trio seemed to be in a fix, and it put him two wishes closer to being free from his current predicament.
Semfeld moved over and picked up the turtle. “Thanks heaps, turtle; you’re a real life saver!” He carried him over and dropped him in the sack. The turtle didn’t mind; after being a rock for five hundred years, being a turtle in a sack was a breeze! Especially since as soon as the sack closed, he conjured up a comfortable little palace with a nice wading pond for him to relax in.
Semfeld looked at the bed-boards. “Well, we can put our bedrolls on it and we should be just as comfortable as out on the hard ground. At least here, there’s no bugs to worry about.”
“Don’t look under the bed.”
Semfeld nodded at Chéri. It would be the last thing he would do. “Got it.”
“Juth make one big bed and it will be more comfy,” suggested Liverioso.
Chéri frowned. “All right, gentlemen. Here’s the deal. I am not in any way interested in either of you at all. I have a very dear mate that I want to get back to. He is the one I care about. So if we make one bed, I just want you to know that I’m not going to tolerate any sort of... anything.”
Semfeld put on a smile. “Of course, we’re honorable men, after all.” Inside he screamed ‘CURSES!’ He looked at his partner. “Right?”
Liverioso quickly put on a smile of his own. He nodded furiously. “Thath’s right. Your honor is safe with uth.” Inside he screamed ‘NOOOOOOO!’
“Well, good then. Let’s make one bed and get some sleep. We can’t be trudging around this forest all tired or we’re done for.”
/>
Chapter Forty-Two
Look! Who’s Coming?
That’s the last one. Promise.
Chéri startled awake. She tried to sit up but couldn’t; Semfeld and Liverioso were both snuggled up against her. “Ridiculous.” Still, it was a good night’s sleep. Something had awoken her, though. She looked at the Shamblers. They were still standing in the corner just as they had been left the night before. One turned and looked at her.
Outside, she heard a clatter of armor. She struggled out from under the two Magicians. They both rolled over away from each other, still asleep. Stealthily, she moved to the door and peeked out a crack. There were three Orcs standing in front of the shack. She recognized them all. “Great; Puddles, Toadstool, and that other one who went for wood.” She looked down at the door latch and the hastily rigged, mostly rotten, piece of wood jammed into the mechanism. It was the only thing standing between them and what would probably be a hard fought -losing- battle. Chéri pressed her ear against the door to listen.
“Well, they gots to be ‘round here somewheres,” said one.
“Mayhap they made it to Cool Springs. It’s not but about ten minute’s ride each from here.”[22]
“ ‘Specially since they got Shamblers.”
Chéri frowned. Ten minutes? We could have been safe in town instead of trapped in here! She turned to the Magicians. They were now snuggled with each other. Moving to them quietly, she pressed her hands over their mouths. Immediately their eyes flew open. “Shhh. We’ve got company,” she whispered.
The two nodded.
Chéri moved to the door and peeked out again. The Orcs were still talking. She listened in once again.
“... it were locks from the insides, so there’s no ways they are in there.”
“But what if they locks it once they got in?” Said a second Orc.
“Don’ be stupid.”
Chéri heard a meaty slap.
“Sorry Maccus. I weren’t thinkin’ ,” said Slapp-ee.
“So where you want to look?” Asked Non-Slapped.
“Let’s go look around town. See if they is there,” said Maccus AKA Slapp-er.
“But we can’t fight in town or our heads gets put on pikes,” complained Slapp-ee.
“Yeah, but we cans look.”
Grunts all around indicated the plan was accepted by all.
Chéri took her ear from the door and turned. She startled because Semfeld and Liverioso were crowding her.
“What’d they thay?”
“They’re going to look for us in town”. She scowled. “And town, it seems, is only ten minutes away.”
“Whath? Thath stupid turtle!”
Chéri noticed that the more nervous he was, the more he lisped. “Well, that’s the good news at least. I say we give them the ten minutes, and maybe a couple more, then make a break for town.”
“Whath if they catch us there?”
Chéri shook her head. “Relax; they said if they fight in town, their heads get put on pikes.”
“Then I say we pick a fight with them if we see ‘em in town,” suggested Semfeld.
“We need to keep a low profile,” said Chéri. “Besides, they may just put all heads on pikes; not just the Orc ones.”
“Oh.”
“Well, I goth to pee. Think we can sneak out for that?”
Chéri peeked out the crack again. She couldn’t hear anyone. Pressing her ear up to the crack, she closed her eyes and concentrated. “Nothing. I think it’s safe to...” a rustling outside made her stop. She looked out the crack again. There was an Orc eye looking back at her. Startled, Chéri flinched back and jammed her finger through the crack.
“OWWW!” Screamed an Orc. “Tol’ yas they was in there!”
“Semfeld put that turtle down. We’re going to have to make a run for it. Untie the Shamblers, Liv.”
Semfeld took the turtle from the sack and put it on the ground.
Chéri looked back out the crack. The three Orcs were standing together. One had his hand over his eye. “Hurry up Liv, or we’re all dead.”
The Orcs turned to look at the shack. One nodded and moved out of view.”
“Liv?”
Liverioso was struggling to get one Shambler behind the other. “Almoth there.”
Chéri looked back out. The missing Orc came back into view. He was dragging a large dry bush. He tossed it against the door and disappeared again.
“Lord High Priest on a stick. We need to get out of here.” Eye-poked Orc moved out of sight.
“Sem, What’ve you got?”
Semfeld looked down at the turtle. “Town has to be ten minutes from here. Take us to town.”
It seemed as close to requesting a wish as the previous time, so the TurtleDjin complied. It nodded and began to walk towards a corner of the shack. “Got it!” Semfeld picked up the turtle. “Thanks turtle!” He smooched it then dropped it back in the sack. The turtle immediately went back to lounging in a marble pool. That also contained a dozen bathing beauties.
“It’s that way when we go out the door.” He pointed in a 45 degree angle from the door.
“OK. The Shamblers are ready,” said Liverioso. He was seated on the front one, head ducked down. “Leth’s go.” He put his hand down to pull up Chéri.
“How bad you got to pee?” Chéri asked with a smile.
“Pretty bad.”
“I’ll ride with Semmie.”
Semfeld mounted the other Shambler. “Ready, Chéri.” He reached his hand down.
Chéri shook her head. “Someone’s got to open the door and move the bushes out of the way.” As if on cue, another bush could be heard hitting the door. Early yesterday she would have never offered to be the one left dismounted, but after recent events, she was sure the Humans wouldn’t leave her behind. “Liv. You go first. Go straight out the door then when you’re in the forest, head toward town.” She pointed in a 45 degree angle from the door. “That way. Got it?”
“OK.”
“Semmie. I’m going to open the door and drag the bushes to the right. After Lives makes a break for it, swing right, pick me up, and we’ll catch back up when we’re all heading the right way.”
“You thure that’s a good plan?”
“It’s a horrible plan, but it’s all we have time for. Ready?” Chéri poised her hand above the block holding the latch in place.
Semfeld put his spear out like a lance. The two Shamblers clomped their hooves on the floorboards. They weren’t sure what was happening, but it was exciting all the same.
Chéri heard another bush hit the door. “Colossus, give me strength.” She gave the two Humans a nod. “Here we go.”
Chéri gently pulled the block and dropped it to the ground. She lifted the latch. “Thank the gods this door opens in.” She carefully pulled the door open to see a large pile of shrubs blocking her path. Two of the Orcs were out of sight. The third was squatted down using a tinderbox to start a small pile of kindling. His back was to her, shielding his workspace from an early morning breeze.
Steeling herself, she grabbed hand’s-full of branches and pushed out and to the right. The entire pile of dry bushes moved easily as she stepped out of the door. Until she ran into Eye-poked Orc.
“Hey!” He complained as he dropped the two bushes he was carrying. He squinted his one good eye. “Stop that!”
“Go! Go! Go!” Chéri shoved the bushes against the Orc and held them there, trying to keep him at bay.
Tinderbox Orc stood and turned. “Hey youse!” He took a step toward her as Liverioso’s Shambler came out the door. He heeled its sides roughly, coaxing it to a gallop within three strides. As he headed for the forest, his Shambler hit Tinderbox Orc with its shoulder, spinning him to the ground.
Eye-poked Orc grabbed the shrubs Chéri was holding and tossed them over his shoulder, removing all obstacles between him and her. “You th’ one that poked out m’ eye?”
“That was him!” Chéri pointed at the disappearing Liver
ioso.
The Orc turned to look.
Semfeld came out of the door. “Chéri!” He called.
Eye-poked Orc turned back to look at Semfeld and took a step towards him.
Chéri blindly stepped back and raised both arms, hands spread wide. She prepared for the back-jarring yank that was to come from Semfeld.
It didn’t.
Semfeld exited the shack, seeing that his partner had knocked one Orc to the ground, and looped out the door and angled toward the Orc advancing on Chéri, spear held out.
Chéri stumbled back, almost losing her balance. She turned to look for Semfeld just as he passed her on the other side- she didn’t see him. “Semfeld!”
Eye-Poked Orc fought between paying attention to the Gnomess and the Human on the Shambler. He wasn’t sure who to kill first.
Maccus got to his feet. He knew exactly who needed to be killed first; the most dangerous. “Get rid of the mounted one!” He drew his long knife. “I’ll get the female.” He advanced on Chéri.
Chéri, spun around to see Eye-poked Orc draw a sword and turn to face Semfeld, who was now moving toward him, spear held out. Chéri drew her dagger, flipped it over in her hand and launched it at Eye-poked Orc’s back. It struck him high and between the shoulders. Eye-poked Orc arched his back as he reached over his shoulder to remove the buried-to-the-hilt dagger. Just as Semfeld’s spear hit him in the center of the chest. The spear was wrenched out of Semfeld’s hand as it stuck almost a foot into the Orc. The Orc spun to the side and dropped to the ground, dead before he even hit.
Chéri ran forward and yanked her (now) trusty Pic dagger from the Orc’s back. She stood on his back as Semfeld turned in a broad arc back towards her.
Maccus advanced on Chéri, long knife held out in front of him- apparently the more deadly one was dismounted, this time. “All right, knife tosser, let’s see what yas gots.” He swapped the knife from hand to hand as he advanced.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw that Semfeld had managed his turn and was now galloping towards her. In a move that went against all her weapons training, she sheathed her bloody dagger. Once again, she raised her hands over her head, still facing the advancing Orc.
Here's Looking For You, Grim (Tales From a Second-Hand Wand Shop Book 3) Page 27
