The Very Thought of You

by Angela Weaver

  “And all that translates to?”

  Caleb eyed Miranda carefully. Though obviously intrigued, she looked ready to run at any moment.

  “All of this means that you’re avoiding me. I want you, and everyone at the hospital is going to take bets on the undoing of Dr. Blackfox.”

  He pressed the button to unlock the doors to the Mercedes SUV and opened the passenger side door. Their eyes locked. With the bright winter light warming her face, Miranda’s eyes were stunning. And the absence of the French twist made his fingers itch to touch her hair.

  “Am I your undoing, Caleb?” she asked.

  There was a hum of amusement in her voice and the corner of his mouth hitched up a little higher. “Let me make it plain. When we were together years ago, we were good together. Now? You’re still the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever met. You have a smile that could melt a polar ice cap and you have the sexiest eyes that light up whenever those deliciously perfect lips break into a smile.”

  He reached out and ran his fingertips lightly across her cheek. “You’ve got a scent that can drive a man crazy,” he said, moving closer to whisper in her ear. Giving in to temptation, Caleb kissed her neck gently and Miranda sighed, leaning into his body. She was soft, sweet and warm. All the things he was missing in this life. He wanted to wrap his hands around her body and kiss her until they both ran out of air. But the cold wind and the sound of a car engine turning over brought him back to reality. “So to answer your question, sweetness,” he whispered close to her ear. “I’m already undone.”

  He pulled back and smiled into her wide-eyed stare. “You…are not serious,” she stammered.

  “I am more serious about you than anything else in my life. Now let’s have lunch.”

  Caleb held out his hand and assisted her into the Benz. After closing the door he let out a sigh and gave himself a pat on the back. Undone, un-hinged, unglued. But with Miranda in his life…

  At least he wouldn’t be unhappy.

  “Welcome to the best Italian restaurant north of Atlanta,” Caleb announced as he opened the restaurant’s door.

  If he’d told her the sky was lavender and world peace could come from the bottom of a Cracker Jack box, Miranda would have believed him. In the space of half a mile, Caleb Blackfox had managed to erase over ten years of distance. Even fate seemed to be working in his favor. It was the only way she could rationalize how their “favorite” song happened to be playing on the radio.

  “Thank you,” Miranda said as she walked through the small doorway of a restaurant named Bella. Immediately upon stepping into the building, she caught the scent of bread from the oven, olive oil, garlic and herbs.

  The host greeted them as Caleb stepped into the foyer. He was a small man with a cute little mustache, little creases around his eyes and laugh lines. He led them past crowded tables to seat them at a nice secluded one in the back corner of the restaurant.

  A soft romantic glow seemed to encircle the round table covered with a white cloth. A small glass vase held a miniature rose. Caleb pulled out her seat and gestured.

  “This is very chivalrous of you,” Miranda commented after he’d placed a cloth napkin on her lap.

  “It’s all a part of the plan.”

  She eyed him suspiciously. “What plan?”

  “The one that starts with a little food, a lot of kissing and ends with a nice prelude to baby making.”

  “Caleb…”

  “Look, just kidding. You should loosen up, Ms. Tyler.”

  Miranda paused as the waiter arrived to pour the water. Glancing around the restaurant, she noticed that the decor was warm and inviting with a fresh, romantic and rustic surrounding. Mahogany wood, rich fabrics and Italian accents gave her a true feeling of dining in a countryside villa. In the background she could hear the barest jingle of pots and pans from the kitchen as opera sang out from invisible speakers.

  She sighed. “This is all a little unsettling. Very little has changed in the town since I left home, but I’ve changed.”

  Caleb grinned and took his seat. “You’ve changed for the better. Women age like fine wine. We men are more like moldy cheese. Just ask my mother.”

  “You are incorrigible.”

  “It’s true. I see it in my patients. Married men are a better grade of cheese than the old bachelors. I might pass that on to your brother.”

  Miranda laughed out loud, and a warm feeling of affection enveloped him.

  God, she’s a beauty, Caleb thought. The candlelight flickered and warmed her face as she laughed. Her hair, still disheveled from the wind, curled before her ears and gave him images of it spread out on his pillow. Her skin shone like burnished amber. She looked like she’d been born of his dreams, with her lush lips and dark eyes. How in the world could any man have let her go? How could he have let her go?

  “What happened to your marriage, Miranda?”

  Sighing, she placed the menu on the table, reached for the water glass and took a sip. “We were good friends.”

  “I could have guessed that.”

  “I was struggling with the death of a friend and becoming a single mother. He’d lost his wife in a car accident. It just seemed natural for the two of us to gravitate to one another. He was dependable, good-hearted, charming and honest. I thought maybe the stability he provided would be an answer to my situation.”

  “It wasn’t?”

  “No.”

  “Is that why you divorced?”

  “We went into the marriage with the best of intentions and came out of it wiser.”

  “Did you love him?” Caleb could barely force the words out of his throat.

  “I still love him.” She paused. “I think of him as a best friend, and he is Kelly’s father. But what I feel for him is not the same love my parents share or the kind people sing about. That kind of love is the kind that marriages are based on.”

  He pondered her response for a moment before saying, “Thank you.”

  “Why are you thanking me, Caleb?”

  He reached across the table and placed his hand on top of hers. Miranda felt the warmth of his regard to the tips of her toes. “For being honest.”

  She had to look away for the fear of what he would see in her eyes. The ball of apprehension in her stomach grew because fifty percent of what she’d just said had been lies.

  “You’re welcome. Now are you going to feed me or interrogate me?”

  “I’d like to do both and then some. But let me feed you first.”

  Miranda picked up the menu and pretended to study it. After a few moments, she gave up her pretense, closed the menu and asked, “So what do you recommend?”

  “Anything with shrimp.”

  “Good idea. Let me use my deductive reasoning. The host knows you by name and you have a favorite table, so you’re a regular.”

  “At least twice a week.”

  “I’m going to guess that you’ve tried about everything on the menu, except the liver.”

  “You remember?” He grinned.

  “How could I forget the look on your face when my father said that we were having liver for dinner?” Miranda chuckled. “I don’t know how you did it, but you managed to eat all of it.”

  “I didn’t have a choice. Your dad practically sat across from me at the dinner table and watched me like a hawk while your brother manipulated me into having to eat a second helping.”

  “I’m still embarrassed at the way they behaved.”

  “It was bad, but you know what? I would do it all over again just to see the look of happiness in your eyes.”

  Miranda ducked her head and looked away. “So what do you recommend?”

  Leaning back in the chair, Caleb answered, “I would say that everything on the menu is good, but you might want to try either the lasagna rolls or the spinach fettuccine with chicken and sundried tomatoes.”

  The waiter returned and after they placed their orders, a comfortable silence settled over the table. A little more th
an off balance by Caleb’s appreciative regard, Miranda asked, “How is your family?”

  “Almost all the same. Marius is still a workaholic, Trey has his own veterinary practice in Atlanta, and Regan finally found someone strong enough to take away the keys to her race car and put a ring on her finger.”

  “Regan’s married?” Miranda asked in surprise. If ever there was a poster child for tom girls, Regan was it.

  “She just married an artist. I think my mother sent invites to your family. Most likely she was hoping that you would come and put me out of my misery.”

  “You seem to be very far from miserable.”

  “Well according to my mother all the unmarried men are miserable, we just ignore it. My uncle James goes out of his way to ignore my mother when she goes into one of her tirades on marriage.”

  “What is so special about your uncle?”

  “He’s been a bachelor the longest.”

  “Is that by choice or circumstance?”

  “Both. He made a few bad decisions and ended up losing the woman he loved to another man.”

  “That’s rough.”

  “For the longest time we all doubted he would ever get into a serious relationship.”

  “But that’s changed?”

  “We hope. Last week I heard it through the grapevine that he’s bought a place in Atlanta in order to facilitate his hunt for a wife.”

  Miranda’s eyes widened. “You cannot be serious.”

  Caleb crossed his heart and laughed. “I couldn’t be more serious. Apparently, his best friend is tying the knot in Aruba this summer and Uncle James doesn’t want to be the last man standing.”

  “That’s a good reason to get married.”

  “Right now we’ll take whatever we can get. The family’s still in shock that he’s even thinking about a long-term relationship.”

  Just then the waiter returned with their order. Miranda sat back as the waiter came with their food. “Signora and Signore, buon appetito.”

  Miranda bowed her head and mentally blessed the food before returning her attention to the handsome doctor across the table.

  She had just taken a bite of her spinach fettuccini when he spoke. “So tell me about D.C. How do you like your job?”

  “Caleb, I have just taken a taste of manna from the heavens. If you have any mercy, please wait until at least my third bite.”

  Caleb let out such a laugh that many of the patrons in the restaurant turned toward their table. The men glanced and turned away, but the women’s eyes slowly lingered before returning to their meal. When Caleb laughed, it made you forget yourself in the sound.

  “D.C. is just a big city with an oversize population of journalists and politicians. I like my job. It has its good days and its bad.”

  “Would you ever consider moving?”

  She eyed him curiously. “Where else would I go?”

  “I was thinking more about you coming home…permanently.”

  Miranda dropped her eyes to her plate and absently stared at her fork. His question wasn’t a new one. Her family had been asking for years. And recently she’d been wondering the same thing herself. She had friends in Washington and a good life, but something had always seemed to be missing. Since she’d been home, she hadn’t felt that way.

  Oh, dear Lord, it felt so right. She was enjoying the meal and the conversation. She also enjoyed hearing his voice and the look of tender amusement in his eyes as they talked.

  Miranda couldn’t help but recall their first real date when he’d picked her up from her dorm and taken her to a small Indian restaurant.

  “Can I ask you a question, Caleb?”

  “You can ask me anything, beautiful.”

  “What made you decide to become a doctor?”

  His eyes had widened in surprise—and she’d lain in bed that night wondering what he’d expected her to ask. Maybe questions about his family, his wealth, his reputation as a ladies man.

  “I guess it’s more of a when than why.”

  “How so?”

  “In high school, I’d planned on majoring in finance and working alongside my brother at the company.”

  “Why did you change?”

  “One of my good friends had a severe seizure during class one afternoon.” Caleb took a sip of water. “My classmates and I sat there watching until the ambulance came. I didn’t like the feeling of complete helplessness. It just became more evident in college that I was much better at being a doctor than a number cruncher.”

  And she remembered their first kiss in the front seat of his car.

  Sweet Jesus, his kiss had felt good. His kiss, his mouth was hot and firm, yet tender lips. They had moved over hers with gentle gliding motions. His cologne mingled with the scent of leather. He’d settled his lips on the corner of her mouth and teased her bottom lip with his teeth.

  “Miranda?”

  She blinked and her mind cleared of memories. “I’m sorry, can you repeat what you just said?”

  “I’d rather know about the thoughts that are making your cheeks flush.”

  Gathering together a semblance of calm, she met those brown eyes and her skin tingled. She picked up the napkin, patted her lips and then replied, “I was remembering our first date.”

  “It was one of the best nights of my life.”

  “I thought that was the night that we saw Alvin Ailey.” She smiled.

  “I said one of, not the best.”

  Miranda looked away and for the next hour they talked about everything from music to politics. They debated why the Canadian health-care system wouldn’t work in America and what it would take for Medicare to succeed. They also had a lively discussion about the effects of television on the youth, and that they didn’t produce programs like The Cosby Show anymore.

  “So what is it that you do again?” Caleb asked.

  “I work for the Justice Department’s Witness Protection Agency. It’s more of the ‘behind the scenes’ support. Federal Marshals do a lot of the work. I just assist with the background stuff.”

  “You’re the details woman?” he said.

  “Exactly.”

  “It really fits with your personality. Helping the good guys and putting the bad guys behind bars. You save lives just like me.”

  She chewed her lip for a moment as her mind processed Caleb’s observation. Miranda felt a moment of discomfort as Caleb’s assessing gaze grew all the more intent.

  “So, as a person who is an expert on hiding people, I bet you’d be good at finding someone.”

  “I never thought about it that way, but I guess it would be the same, just in reverse.”

  As they returned to their meal, a mother and child were seated at a table alongside theirs. The little girl looked to be about a year old. She was taken with Caleb. She waved her rattle and cooed all the while those brown eyes watched Miranda’s lunch companion like a hawk.

  Smiling at Caleb, Miranda commented, “I think she’s in love.”

  “Who?” He looked up from his meal. She pointed to the little baby in the stroller. Caleb looked over, waved at the little girl and chuckled as the baby began to wave her rattle vigorously.

  Caleb smiled, finishing his lunch. “I wish I could attract the attention of a certain beautiful project manager the same way I get attention from the under-one-year-old females.”

  Throughout the meal, he’d watched her under the guise of eating. His pasta could have turned to sawdust for as much as he paid attention to the taste of his own meal. He’d thoroughly enjoyed watching her mouth as she ate her pasta. And the sight of her lips as she sucked in a string of fettuccine had taken the sensuality of Italian food to another level.

  “Well, I hear that most men like them young and the women love them old.”

  “Ouch.” He grinned and clutched at his chest in imagined pain.

  “I’m curious, Caleb. Are you seeing someone? And why hasn’t some handpicked southern belle put a ring around your finger?”

 
; His response was cut off by the waiter’s arrival with coffee. The answer when it came was surprising in its honesty. Caleb added cream and sugar to his cup. “Fear,” he said.

  “How so?”

  He looked at her with serious eyes. “Fear of waking up and realizing that I’d made a mistake. And the fear of a lifetime of regret for not being man enough to come after you.”

  Temporarily rendered speechless, Miranda looked down at her coffee and groped for some witty or sarcastic remark to make light of his statement. But the harder she tried, the less she could think of a response.

  “Look, Caleb…” she started.

  Seeing her nervously chewing on the edge of her bottom lip, Caleb felt a protective pang in his heart. “Miranda, I didn’t say that to force you to respond. I just wanted to be honest and put my cards out on the table. If it hadn’t been for my actions, we could have been married with our own house full of kids. I believe that with every fiber of my being, and I’m warning you now that I’m not going to let this opportunity pass by.”

  Miranda’s brow arched while her gaze filled with curiosity. “And if I disagree?” she asked softly.

  “Do you?”

  She inhaled deeply. “I don’t know. I think…”

  “Tell me how you feel first.” His voice deepened and compelled Miranda to answer as he stared across at her. And for a moment, the attraction flared between them.

  Miranda shook her head to try and pull herself out of the enticing spell he seemed to weave. “Confused, frustrated, scared.”

  Their eyes collided. “You can be all those things, but you have to know that I would never purposefully hurt you.”

  They sipped their coffee in the silence and afterwards made their way back to the hospital. Ever the perfect gentleman, he kept up a stream of small talk all the way.

  Upon pulling into his designated parking space, Caleb turned off the engine but kept the stereo on. He reached over and turned down the volume. “You’re not upset about lunch, are you?”

  Miranda shook her head and inhaled deeply. The second the warm tantalizing scent of his cologne hit her nose she regretted it as she felt her nipples harden.

  She looked over at him. “I could lie.”