Rachel (last name unknown): 232 years old at the time she entered cryogenic suspension in 1973. Fast Eddie visits her every week. See CALLAHAN'S CROSSTIME SALOON for details.
Maureen: this is probably Maureen Hooker, former artist in the employ of Lady Sally McGee, currently free-lancing as a team with her husband Willard, a legendary confidence man now retired from the game. They fell in love in callahan’s lady.
Priscilla (last name unknown): Lady Sally’s bouncer; sort of a female version of the Terminator—the friendly one, from the second film. Her heroic death is recounted in lady slings the booze; briefly, she died because she was bulletproof.
Phillip (last name unknown) and Tim (last name unknown): alumnae of Lady Sally’s House; see cl and lstb for details.
Father Newman: a Catholic priest who hung out…uh…religiously at Lady Sally’s House. An organized and determined conspiracy of patrons, who attempted to nail down once and for all whether or not he ever actually availed himself of an artist’s services while there, disbanded with the question unresolved. I know, but I won’t tell you.
Woodrow W. Smith, Commodore Aaron Sheffield and Lazarus Long: Yep. That guy. Very merry gent. For an explanation of how a fictional character could walk into a bar in real life, see “THE NUMBER OF THE BEAST—” by Robert A. Heinlein.
Stinky Kettering: all anyone remembers about this guy is that he probably came in with Lazarus Long.
Zebadiah J. Carter, Dr. Jacob Burroughs: see above note regarding W.W. Smith. It was believed at the time that these customers might be gay (despite the fact that their female companions were knockouts) since they were overheard using that word an inordinate number of times. The Heinlein novel cited above later explained the matter.
Tommy Robbins: all I know is, the only surviving photo of him bears a remarkable resemblance to the guy who autographed my copy of even cowgirls get the blues. Could be…
Gentleman John Kilian: his photo resembles the guy who autographed my copy of stand on zanzibar.
Larry Van Cott: strongly resembles the guy who autographed my copy of RINGWORLD, down to the detail that he apparently never drank anything but Irish coffee at Callahan’s. The fact that said author writes a competing series of bar stories might account for the pseudonym…
Chip Delany: looks very much like the guy who autographed my copy of babel-17.
Edgar Pangborn: If this is indeed the Pangborn who wrote davy and “Angel’s Egg,” I could kick myself for missing him at Callahan’s. He’s not with us any more, more’s the pity. Look him up in the library!
John D. MacDonald: again, if this was the author of the Travis McGee series and so many other fine books, I wish I’d bumped into him at Mike’s place; among other things, I always wanted to ask him what Meyer’s other name is, just to see how he’d answer …
Ted Sturgeon: no question, this is that Ted Sturgeon, one of the two best science fiction writers who ever lived. I brought him to Callahan’s myself. He was Punday Night champion for eight weeks running, a record exceeded only by Doc Webster himself—and gave seminars in Unlimited Inquiry (the symbol you’ll find with his quote was part of his autograph, and stood for “Ask the Next Question…”); Marriages Involving Odd Numbers of Spouses, and Advanced Hugging. God bless you, Theodore, wherever you are.
Robert A. Heinlein: Ted’s only peer. If you don’t know who he is, you should be reading one of his books instead of this one.
Dick Buckley: internal evidence—and mutual friend Ed McCurdy—suggest this may have been the late Lord Buckley (the Gasser! 1907-1960), the legendary American monologist who composed and declaimed free-verse tributes to his heros in Hipster, a dialect created by black jazz musicians and later adopted and adapted by white jazz musicians, beatniks, hippies and other undesirables. C.P. Lee states that, like Louis Armstrong, His Lordship never performed without firing up a large pipe of marijuana first; unlike Pops, he did so onstage. Lee also claims that Buckley and an entourage once crashed a Sinatra concert at the Waikiki Sheraton, stark naked. (George Harrison’s song “Crackerbox Palace” was named for Lord Buckley’s home.) Though his frame be long stashed, His Lordship’s surviving records are well worth the trouble of seeking out.
Tom Waits: Yes, this would seem to be the well-known pop star, songwriter, actor and former jazz singer—who once gave me permission to quote his song “$29 and an Alligator Purse” in my novel mindkiller, in exchange for $29.00. (Guess he didn’t need a purse…)
Stephen Gaskin: a preacher and semiretired wizard, who taught classes on spirituality at the Family Dog back at the dawn of the Hippie Era, crossed the continent with a convoy of school buses, and eventually founded the most successful of the hippie communes, The Farm, in Summertown, Tennessee. (It’s still there—and so is he—but the last time I visited, they were pointedly ignoring each other.) At its peak The Farm consisted of 1,000+ freaks on 1000+ acres, totally self-supporting and living in harmony with their rural neighbors. Their international disaster-relief arm, Plenty, was praised as a model by the Canadian government. Nowadays the Farm is a corporation: you own shares, or some such; and I’m not sure what happened to Plenty since everyone I knew in it has quit.
I got no use for gurus and holy men. Irish whiskey works just fine for me. But I’m willing to punch the ticket of Stephen, and of one of his teachers, Shunryu Suzuki-roshi—because neither of them ever claimed to be any more than a guy who’d had a few minutes to think, and had noticed some interesting things.
One quick Stephen story that may make my point: he gets up from dinner one night in the early ’70s to answer the door: there stands an awestruck young man who says he’s just walked here from the Coast because he’s decided his mission in life is to follow Stephen around and record his every utterance for posterity, unobtrusively and at the lad’s own expense. Stephen gently closes the door in his face and returns to the table. “Who was that?” asks his wife Ina May. “A temptation from the Evil One,” Stephen murmurs, and finishes his soyburger…
That’s my kind of preacher. Which is partly why I wrote the introduction to his latest book, haight-ashbury flashbacks (Ronin Press 1992). To give you an idea, its original 1980 edition was titled amazing dope tales.
Charlie Daniels: one of my oldest and best friends in the world; directly responsible for my move to Canada in the ’70s; presently straightening spines and otherwise practicing chiro in Yarmouth, Nova Scotia. The Lucky Duck, who appears in the current book the callahan touch, bears a bit of a resemblance to Charlie. Less sarcastic, though…
Anonymous: a Callahan’s regular so self-effacing that no one can recall much about him. Not even how he got that name, which I’m sure we must have asked. In fact, I’m not sure he isn’t still around Mary’s Place somewhere.
Sam Meade: a passing folksinger who ended up in Nova Scotia.
Edison Ripsborn: nothing is known about this customer. Related to Pangborn somehow?
Ben Bova: Yes, the Ben Bova, multiple-award-winning writer, ex-editor (of Analog and Omni) and space enthusiast, and my oldest friend in this business. (Well, I knew Jim Frenkel first, but neither of us was in the business then.) He became a regular at Callahan’s shortly after I sold him the very first of Jake’s stories about it, in 1972…and he and Barbara are still seen in Mary’s Place (the bar Jake opened up after Callahan’s Place was destroyed) today. But not often enough…
About The Author
Photo by Greg McKinnon
Spider Robinson was born in the Bronx, NY, in 1948, the year Robert A. Heinlein married Virginia Gerstenfeld—and in 2006 he became the only author ever to collaborate with Mr. Heinlein on a novel, VARIABLE STAR. Since 1973 he has published over thirty-five books, and won three Hugos, a Nebula, the John W. Campbell Award, and numerous other international honours.
He moved to Canada in 1974, and became a Canadian citizen in 2004. His Callahan’s Place stories inspired the creation of the longrunning Usenet newsgroup alt.callahans and other cybernetworks. From 1995-2004 he published
an op-ed column (“The Crazy Years,” later called “Future Tense”) in Canada’s national newspaper, The Globe and Mail. In 2006 he became the first Writer In Residence at Vancouver’s H.R. MacMillan Space Centre, and in 2010 he was named sixth Writer In Residence at the Vancouver Public Library. He has written songs with David Crosby and Todd Butler, and recorded original music with Amos Garrett and Michael Creber. His award-winning podcast Spider On The Web has appeared regularly since 2007, and he has been Toastmaster at two World Science Fiction Conventions.
He was married for 35 glorious years to Jeanne Robinson, a dancer, writer and Buddhist priest with whom he co-authored the Hugo- and Nebula-winning THE STARDANCE TRILOGY. In 2004, they were both separately invited by First Lady Laura Bush to appear at the National Book Festival in Washington, D.C. Since Jeanne’s death in May 2010, Spider has lived alone on an island in Howe Sound, British Columbia. He suspects his granddaughter Marisa Alegria da Silva might just be the long-awaited Maitreya Buddha, who will bring enlightenment to all sentient beings.
For further information visit www.spiderrobinson.com
Table of Contents
Title Page
Books by Spider Robinson
Foreword
Graffiti
Puns (I)
Puns (II)
Songs
Dramatis Personae
About The Author
Callahan's Place 10 - Off The Wall At Callahan's (v5.0) Page 6
