by Rhonda Bowen
“This is your fault,” she sobbed, her blows growing weaker and more far apart. “You did this, this is your fault.”
She finally gave up and let him crush her against his chest. Then she cried the deep, angry sobs she would never let her sisters see. Her eyes hurt and she knew they were swelling up like tennis balls, along with her nose, but she didn’t care. It didn’t even matter that he was about to see her at her worst, because after tonight, he wouldn’t see her at all.
But for the time being, she was content to drench his shirt and let him massage her head gently as he tried to convince her it would be OK. Then he started to pray over her, and it occurred to Sydney that this was the most prayer she had heard in one night in a long time.
As her sobs faded away, she felt his hold loosen, and she pulled away and moved toward a bench against the wall a few feet away. She sat down and rested her elbows on her knees as she covered her face with her hands. A few moments later, she felt him sink down beside her.
“So you’re telling me you don’t know anything about what happened,” Sydney said hoarsely after a long moment.
“No,” Hayden said, shaking his head.
Sydney sighed and sat back.
“Sheree took off about a week ago with everything Dean had,” Sydney said. “Dean came back from his trip and the house was stripped bare. So were his bank accounts. She took everything, Hayden, even the money from the sale of the shop.”
Sydney watched Hayden tense up right before her eyes. His jaw tightened and he closed his eyes as his head fell back against the wall.
“That’s why you haven’t been taking my calls.” Hayden rubbed a hand over his face. “Let me guess, you can’t get in touch with her.”
Sydney nodded. “No one has seen her since she walked out of the bank. She might as well be a ghost.”
Hayden let out a frustrated sigh. “That’s why your brother’s here.”
“He took it hard. At first he thought something might have happened to her. But when he realized the money was gone”—Sydney shook her head—“that’s when things got really bad. He was drinking tonight.... That’s how he ended up in an accident.”
“Syd . . . I . . . I don’t know what to say.” He leaned forward and turned to look at her. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea Sheree would pull something like this. I wish I could have stopped her.”
He reached for Sydney’s hand, but she pulled away. “Syd . . .”
“You told me she wouldn’t hurt him,” Sydney said, staring straight ahead. “I asked you, and you told me we could trust her.”
Hayden’s eyes widened and he leaned forward to try and meet Sydney’s gaze.
“Syd, I never thought she would do something like this. . . .”
“When Dad died, Dean took it hard. Really hard. But he was finally starting to deal with it. He had his whole life ahead of him,” Sydney continued, her voice calm and even. “We had the shop. And I had a plan. And then you all came along.”
“Sydney . . .”
“And now we have nothing.”
Hayden clasped his hands in his lap and looked down.
“I know you feel like you’ve lost everything—”
“You don’t know how I feel,” Sydney said, cutting him off. No one knew how she felt. How she’d felt for the past two years as the life she planned slowly crumbled like a hill of bread crumbs. First she had lost her dad. Then the shop. Then her savings. And now her brother. There was nothing left for anyone to take from her. It was all gone.
“You told me it would be OK,” Sydney said, willing the tears that burned at the back of her eyes to stay at the back of her eyes. “You said it would work out; that it would all be fine.”
She stood up. “This is not what fine feels like.”
“Don’t do this, Sydney,” he said as she began to walk away. “We can find her. We can fix this.”
“No, we can’t,” Sydney threw over her shoulder. “There is no more ‘we.’ ”
Sydney kept her gaze straight ahead as she walked back to where her family was. She could feel his eyes on her with every step she took, but she didn’t look back. Sheree and everything connected to her was toxic to Sydney’s family.
Cutting him out of her life was the best thing to do and she knew it. Even if it felt otherwise.
Chapter 18
By the time Sydney returned to the waiting area the Isaacs family had hijacked, her sisters had already returned.
“Where you been?” Lissandra asked before Sydney could sit down. Sydney ignored her. Her emotions were still close to surface level and she didn’t have the patience for Lissandra at that moment.
“Is he gone?” Zelia asked.
“I hope so,” Sydney said.
“Did you ask him about Sheree?”
This time Sydney did look at her sister.
“He doesn’t know where she is,” Sydney snapped.
“Hmm,” Lissandra said, her lip curling. “Pretty convenient, don’t you think?”
JJ and Zelia looked back and forth between Lissandra and Sydney. They knew better than to insert themselves into a potential squabble involving Lissandra.
“No,” Sydney said, her annoyance showing. “I think he just doesn’t know where she is. Why would he lie about it?”
“Why?” Lissandra asked, raising an eyebrow. “I could think of five hundred thousand reasons why.”
“The man’s employed by an NBA team and runs his own private practice with pro-level athletes,” Zelia said, rolling her eyes. “You really think he’s gonna screw that up for half of Sheree’s five hundred thousand? He probably makes that much in six months.”
“So I guess you believe him, too,” Lissandra said, scowling.
“I believe that he’s not an idiot. And getting involved in Sheree’s brand of moneymaking would be an idiot move. Anyone with half a brain can see that,” Zelia said.
“What you trying to say?” Lissandra said, easing off the wall she had been leaning against and stepping forward. “You trying to say I’m stupid?”
“Ladies, quit it,” Sydney said, cutting things off before they went where they usually did with Zelia and Lissandra.
“Lissandra, I asked him. He said he doesn’t know where she is. If he said he doesn’t know anything, he doesn’t know anything,” Sydney said, closing the topic.
“Well, I’m glad you’re sure,” Lissandra said, swinging her hips as she walked slowly over to a chair across from Sydney. “’Cause I’m not.”
Lissandra glared at Sydney, but Sydney was familiar with Lissandra’s mind games and this time she wasn’t getting drawn in. There were more important things to worry about.
Just as she was about to lean back, Jackie and Josephine returned to the room.
“How is he?” JJ asked, as they all stood up and moved toward their mother.
“Just as the doctors said,” Jackie answered. Their mother had seemed to age several years since she had gone to Dean’s hospital room. She barely looked strong enough to hold herself up, and JJ and Sydney carefully lowered her into a nearby chair.
“The nurse says he’s fairly stable, but he’s still not responsive,” Josephine continued. “They’re going to keep him in ICU until his blood pressure stabilizes and his other vital signs are at normal levels.”
Sydney turned to their mother. “Mom, there’s nothing else we can do tonight. You need to go home and get some rest. . . .”
“I can’t leave my son here alone. . . .”
“He won’t be alone,” Sydney said gently, rubbing her mother’s hand. “I’ll stick around for the rest of the night.”
“Me, too,” JJ added.
“You all listen to me,” Jackie said. “None of you helped me carry my son the eight-and-a-half months he sat in my belly before he came into this world. You all want to go home, go ahead. But I am not leaving my son tonight.”
Jackie had spoken.
“Fine, I’m staying, too,” Sydney said.
“Same here,
” said JJ.
Lissandra rolled her eyes. “Does that mean I have to stay?”
“No, your selfish behind can take itself back home,” Sydney snapped.
Lissandra scowled again and sat back down in her chair.
“I’ll stay, too—” Josephine began.
“No,” Jackie said, cutting her off. “It’s already late. You need to get home. You and Zelia.”
“No, it’s OK,” Zelia said. “I can stay. . . .”
“No, you can’t,” Jackie said firmly. “I don’t want you girls here all night. Get some sleep and you can come back in the morning.”
Zelia nodded, and she and Josephine kissed Jackie and said their good-byes before leaving.
A throat cleared and they all looked up to realize that the nurse from before was standing near them.
“You are welcome to stay through the night, but visiting hours end shortly. If you want to see your relative, you only have a few minutes left.”
Sydney and JJ stood at the same time.
“Mom, we’ll be back in a bit,” JJ said, squeezing their mother’s hand before she and Sydney followed the nurse down the hallway to Dean’s room.
There were wires and tubes everywhere. They’d connected Dean’s arm to the IV drip that hung above his head. They’d connected his chest to the machines that beeped continuously, and they connected his nose and mouth to the machine that pumped oxygen into his lungs. There were so many Sydney could barely see her brother through it all. But what she did see was enough to double up the tight knots already in her stomach. JJ started crying softly again and Sydney tried to hold her upright as her younger sister’s weight collapsed against her.
“Is it as bad as it looks?” JJ asked.
Sydney nodded as she remembered what the nurse had told her right before they entered the room. “Right now he can’t even breathe on his own.”
Sydney felt the pull of JJ’s weight as she began to sink, and she lowered her sister into a chair near Dean’s bedside.
She grasped her brother’s swollen hand and tried to find the boy she had watched grow up in the bruised and bandaged face that was in front of her. This could not be it for her brother. He was only twenty-one years old. He had his whole life ahead of him. He may have been hardheaded and impulsive, but he didn’t deserve to have his heart broken because of it. He certainly didn’t deserve to die because of it.
Sydney suddenly couldn’t breathe, as she considered the possibility of Dean dying. Of her brother not being there. The tears that had been welling up poured down her cheeks as she leaned close to Dean, lifting his still hand to her cheek.
“Dean.” Tears clouded her voice. “I know you can hear me. You need to come out of this. You are too young to be lying here like this. And I am too young to watch my baby brother waste away. I need you to wake up, Dean. Just . . . wake up.”
Her body shook with sobs as she held her brother’s hand close to her heart. He was her heart, just like all her sisters and mother were. Just like her father had been.
There was a knock on the door and then she heard the nurse. “A few more minutes, ladies.”
They sat at Dean’s bed until they couldn’t any longer. Then they said their good-byes and exited the room.
As soon as the door closed behind them, JJ put her arms around Sydney and started crying again and Sydney had feelings of déjà vu as she remembered her sister doing the exact same thing a little over a year earlier. They were at this same hospital, and they had just left a hospital room. Leroy’s hospital room. The day they left that room there had been no machines beeping, no oxygen masks, and no IV drip. There had been no need.
As Sydney walked with her sister back to the waiting area, she prayed that the outcome this time would be different. She was tired of losing the men in her life.
Sydney’s joints ached from exhaustion and from being folded into the uncomfortable waiting-room chairs for too many hours. Sleep beckoned her like a child to a loose ball, but she couldn’t reach for it. Not until she knew someone would be there with Jackie. Even though her eyes had been closed most of the time, the woman hadn’t slept a wink all night. Instead, she had alternated between talking to Sydney and JJ about the things she remembered from Dean’s past, and talking to God about Dean’s future. Lissandra, in true Lissandra style, had gone to the bathroom at about two a.m. and not come back. A text message half an hour later confirmed that she had gone home. Sydney was just impressed that her sister had managed to hang around for that long.
“What time is it?” Jackie asked. She had been more quiet the last couple of hours.
“It’s almost seven,” Sydney answered. “Mom, you should go home and get some rest.”
“So should you,” she replied. She turned to JJ. “You, too.”
“We’ll go when you go,” JJ said.
Their mother sighed. “Fine. I’ll go home for a little while. As soon as one of your sisters gets here. I don’t want Dean to be alone.”
Sydney exchanged a look with JJ. There would be no talking Jackie out of this one.
“OK, fine,” Sydney said. “Zelia said she should be here a little after nine. Luke’s going to pick her up and they’ll stay for a while. Can you promise me that as soon as they get here, you’ll go home?”
Jackie pursed her lips. “When they get here, then I’ll consider going home.”
JJ shook her head. “And you wonder where Lissandra gets her stubbornness from.”
“Child, hush your mouth,” Jackie said. But Sydney and JJ saw the slight tilt of her mouth toward a smile.
Zelia and Luke got to the hospital sooner than they thought.
“I got Luke to come a little earlier,” she explained as she entered the waiting area, with her boyfriend just steps behind her. She leaned down and hugged Jackie. “How are you, Mom?”
“I’m fine, dear,” Jackie said with a small smile. “Just glad that someone is here for Dean.”
“I’m so sorry, Ms. Isaacs,” Luke said, his pale skin flushed with concern as he learned down and kissed Jackie’s cheek. “If there’s anything I can do, please let me know.”
“You and Zelia just let me know if you hear anything about Dean,” Jackie said.
He nodded his agreement.
“Now can we take you home?” JJ asked, standing and shouldering her purse.
Jackie sighed and stood tiredly. “All right. But only for a couple hours. I’ll be back later.”
“I’m gonna drop Mom off and then I’ll meet you back at the house,” JJ said.
Sydney nodded and watched as her sister and mother walked away.
“Any change?” Zelia asked, once they were out of earshot.
Sydney shook her head. “No. Same as when you left last night. They think he’s going to be like that for a while, at least until his internal injuries heal.”
Zelia nodded, then looked at Sydney with concern. “You OK? I know you, and somehow you’ve probably figured out a way to blame yourself for this.”
Sydney sighed. “I just keep wondering if somehow we could have stopped this from happening. I should have asked Hayden more about her. How could he not see that she could do something like this?”
“It happens,” Zelia said with a shrug. “People can hide who they really are, even from the people closest to them. I admit it doesn’t look good for him, but maybe he really didn’t know anything.”
Sydney nodded while stifling a yawn. “Yeah. Maybe.”
“OK, you need to go home,” Zelia said. “You’re almost as bad as Mom, thinking you can stay up twenty-four hours. You’re not nineteen anymore, girl.”
“Don’t I know it,” Sydney said dryly as she stood up. “I’m going to head home. But I’ll check in with you later.”
“All right, sissy.”
Sydney gave a weak wave to her sister as she headed down the same corridor her mother and sister had taken toward the parking lot. She was so exhausted. She really should take a cab home. But with her finances in the land o
f uncertainty, and Dean’s hospital expenses on the horizon, she wasn’t about to spend any money she didn’t have to—even on something as small as cab fare. Instead she took the highway home, and managed to get there without incident in twenty minutes.
“Any change?” Lissandra asked as Sydney stepped through the front door.
Sydney barely glanced at her younger sister, who was sitting on a stool near the kitchen counter with an oversized mug in her hands.
“No.” Sydney slipped off her shoes and slipped onto the couch.
“So, what, you’re gonna be mad at me for leaving? You and JJ were already there!” Lissandra protested.
“That’s not me you’re hearing in your head, Lissandra.” Sydney’s eyes were already closed. “It’s your conscience.”
Sydney heard her sister kiss her teeth but still didn’t bother to open her eyes. All she needed was an hour’s rest and she should be fine. However, when she felt the couch sink near her hip she had a feeling that might not be happening right away.
“Here, drink this.” Lissandra nudged Sydney with her elbow.
“What?” Sydney protested, cracking her eye open. She groaned when she saw the mug. “Go away. I don’t want to drink anything, Lissandra. I just want to go to sleep.”
“Not yet,” Lissandra said. “I need to talk to you about something.”
“Now?” Sydney whined.
“Yes, now.”
Sydney groaned into the cushion by her head. Lissandra had slept the whole night in her own bed. Couldn’t she give Sydney a minute to just get some sleep herself?
Sydney sat up with a frown. “OK, what is it? You have sixty seconds. Literally.”
“So I’ve been thinking . . .”
“That’s never good. . . .”
“. . . and the only way we’re going to get back that money is if we find Sheree ourselves.”
Sydney’s mouth fell. “Seriously? That is what couldn’t wait until I got an hour of sleep?”
“This is serious, Syd.”
“No, Lissandra,” Sydney said, her voice going up a decibel. “Serious is our brother, lying on a hospital bed, teetering between death and life. I couldn’t care less about Sheree right now.”
