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by Sarah Dowling




  DOWN

  SARAH DOWLING

  Coach House Books // Toronto, Ontario

  copyright © Sarah Dowling, 2014

  first edition

  Published with the generous assistance of the Canada Council for the Arts and the Ontario Arts Council. Coach House Books also acknowledges the support of the Government of Canada through the Canada Book Fund.

  LIBRARY AND ARCHIVES CANADA CATALOGUING IN PUBLICATION

  Dowling, Sarah, 1982-, author

  Down / Sarah Dowling.

  Poems.

  Issued in print and electronic formats.

  ISBN 978-1-55245-298-1. (pbk).

  ISBN 978 1 77056 395 7. (ebk).

  I. Title.

  PS8607.O9875D69 2014 C811'.6 C2014-904550-6

  Purchase of the print version of this book entitles you to a free digital copy. To claim your ebook of this title, please email sales@chbooks.com with proof of purchase or visit

  chbooks.com/digital. (Coach House Books reserves the right to terminate the free download offer at any time.)

  For Jesse, for making me feel this way

  Everybody looks alike

  and acts alike,

  and we’re getting more

  and more that way.

  I’VE GOT TO TELL YOU

  I’m talking Cause I really

  can’t tell me are you grey

  Say Cause I really Tell me

  I’m not

  If I can’t tell I hope I’m talking

  listen Cause I really need Tell me are you

  really Tell me are you lonely

  I’m not And Is it wet, Is it Cause

  If I If I

  can’t tell you’re real I hope that we’ll Oh

  Boy see I shouldn’t let you but

  Won’t you If you tell you know

  Cause I really Tell me are

  you that somebody Cause I’m

  not but just Say yes You

  can’t tell me Are you

  talking you shouldn’t but if I

  if I let you go We talk

  But don’t know see if I promise you then

  Can you

  SUNSHINE HONEY

  I’ve got yes. I’ve got this. I’ve got anxious. I’ve got

  serenity. I’ve got our existence. Of course disarray never

  included us. I’ve got sunshine. I’ve got an occupying

  attention. I may refer to, must inherently. I’ve got any. I’ve

  got any compulsive relationship, Sunshine.

  Sunshine on a cloudy day, on a method. On expressed or

  implied. Not a thing or a person. On a cloudy day it will

  never be morning. On it. Cloudy in the way that we do

  this. Cloudy day talking, better for us. I’ve got one sexual

  method, described by forms of histories, of aesthetics.

  When made present. When it’s by the explicit. When it’s

  cold, that relentless energy outside their excesses of sex.

  Outside their lives. It’s cold outside and when it’s linked.

  When it’s the trembling cold outside the world.

  I’ve got the month. I may by relentless excesses present

  the explicit. I’ve got their lives of us. The month of method

  and talking. The month of this it. Of course their energy

  would. The month it were day. I must refer. I’ve got disarray.

  May inherently. I’ve got the month to do a thing described.

  I guess, or person. I guess sex. I guess an expressed or

  implied relationship. You’d say very compulsive. I guess

  histories. I guess any form of sexless method. You’d say

  not occupying I guess attention. You’d say that never

  included us.

  What could make this aesthetics. What could make me feel

  that. Make me many. Make me better. What could make me

  sexless and sexual. Make me feel we. Make me feel made.

  Make me feel us. Make me feel matter. Make me feel this,

  for one. What could make me feel this commotion, this

  relationship to energy. What could make me feel this way.

  I’ve got so much occupying. I’ve got a thing or person. I’ve

  got so much inherently. Not histories, never expressed or

  implied. I’ve got relentless. Honey, in the way. So much

  that an attention to forms. I’ve got so much disarray. I’ve

  got so much talking. I’ve got so much excesses. Honey

  included many of us. Honey, of course I’ve got that. I’ve

  got compulsive, got so much sexual.

  The bees envy us. The bees of any sex. The bees of any

  means. The bees of any method. One made a matter of their

  lives. May, for us and for envy. Method and present. We do

  this better. The bees, sexless. It was Monday night. The

  bees, aesthetics, me.

  I’ve got described. I’ve got the explicit. I’ve got the same

  state of trepidation. A sweeter song might be suffering,

  described by their energy. I’ve got a relationship. A sweeter

  song must refer, occupying anything. A sweeter person or

  sex, inherently that us. Sweeter, it pleases me. I’ve got all

  the forms of not.

  Sweeter than the histories, than this relentless sexual

  aesthetics. Than never. The birds included to matter. The

  birds, a one, many of us. Expressed or implied excesses.

  The birds talking. The way that an attention may present the

  trees by disarray. In the trees, any method, the birds. In the

  trees, we do.

  Well, I guess very compulsive. I guess for us. Well, I guess

  and for their explicit lives. I guess the method. Well, I guess

  and I, sexless. You’d say sexless, of course. You’d say

  nevertheless I guess we are part of this disorientation.

  What could make me feel made. What could make me

  better. What could make disarray. This way, forms. This

  way of may not, never. This way of a relationship. What

  could make me feel we, that us. Very occupying method,

  attention. What could make me feel anything. This way or

  any person. What could make this a matter. Feel this one.

  Feel this expressed. Feel in the way of that attention. Feel

  this included, talking to us of it.

  I don’t need or implied. I don’t need histories of excesses.

  I don’t need no explicit lives. And for sex, of course, I don’t

  need us. I don’t need any present. I don’t need no money

  and any compulsive energy. Money described by their

  relentless method. I don’t need no aesthetics. I don’t need

  no, inherently money.

  Fortune or refer. Fortune or a sexual I. Fortune or it strikes

  eleven. Fortune or their. Fortune or sexless, this sexless

  many. Fortune or a certain pace and rhythm. Fortune to this

  stabbing pulsebeat. Fortune or a relationship to a sexual

  better. Fortune or fame occupying that method made us.

  I’ve got by. I’ve got all the forms of matter. I’ve got all

  implied. Baby, that one included sex for us. I’ve got all the

  riches and for any person or thing. Not in the way of

  attention to excesses. I’ve got all it was ten o’clock. I’ve got

  their very method. I’ve got all the disarray. Baby, we refer.

  One man can claim the explicit talking. One man can claim

  aesthetics. One man, never a course of expressed histories.
/>
  Claim lives of this sexless it, I, us. One man described by

  many. One man must. One man can, may present one man,

  relentless and compulsive. One man can claim energy. One

  man can do any, inherently sexless.

  Well, I guess each critical approach. Well, I guess to the

  kind of contact. Well, existing, I guess between people.

  Between peoples. I guess refer. I guess a relationship

  included sex. I guess this described an occupying method.

  You’d say sexual. You’d say forms made compulsive. I

  guess you’d say better that any person may I guess present

  their histories.

  What can make this matter. What can make me feel us.

  Make me feel this method. What can make attention to

  excesses. What can make explicit disarray. What can make

  a relentless course we must do. Make me feel the very

  aesthetics expressed or implied. What can make me feel this

  in their lives of talking. This way that one inherently I, or

  thing. This way, not sexless, never sexless. Would that it

  were. This of us, by many. Make me feel this and any

  energy, for us and for it.

  I think everybody

  should be a machine.

  I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU

  Can you Can you Can you Can

  I promise you If we talk and you know

  But see

  I don’t know if I

  shouldn’t tell but if

  I let you You can’t I’m talking Are you

  I’m not lonely just Is it, Is it Say yes

  or say no Cause I really Tell me are

  you wet Oh

  Boy Won’t you If you tell you know

  that I shouldn’t let you but

  If I let You can’t tell I’m proud I hope

  I’m not Is it Is it Cause I really

  Tell me are you that

  somebody listen Cause I really Tell me are

  you can’t

  tell I’m talking if that’s

  difficult I hope I’m not

  lost just Say Is it Cause I really Tell me are you that

  somebody Cause I really You can’t

  tell I’m talking further

  EVERYONE SLEEP

  Sometimes I’m the sentimental songs I enjoyed when I was

  a teenager liking youLike the buses glow like clouds and I

  am a lonely hawk in a skyThat flies andYou were my hold

  you in my heart with a very real prey (my prey) sat there

  and told my friend how I felt

  Right now I’m the ones I played when I experienced a

  girlFor the first time liking things is like a promiseIf there

  is a place further fromThen we’ll keep it dry the maroon

  robe you know that one of these days (days) were numerous

  and today I sat there and told my friend how I felt

  Sometimes I’m the first time I realized they were written

  in a language of snow goneUp from their calling I did

  not yet speak because you do the same thing every timeWe

  were in the place further from me I beg you do not goBut

  see tears (tears) that sat there and told my friend how I felt

  Right now I realized too quickly that I think I’ve been

  holding backThis yes again being all over the time you do

  mornings in my heart with a very secret place (place)

  further from me I beg youProbably shouldn’t tell you how

  I’ve got to tell you always how I sat there and told my

  friend how I felt

  Sometimes I imagined being thrown from a plane over my

  prey (prey) likeIt’s because you pick me up at the parking

  lot was crowded with a language I did not yet speak and I

  stood up right nowUp the block while everyOne of these

  days when you are alone I sat there and told my friend

  how I felt

  Right now I’m not on a plane though and for days (days)

  everything was waiting againWith lunch in my mouth the

  tea I’ll be coldIf you tell the world I’ve got to tell you the

  buses glow and further from this hawk was in a sky I did

  not yet see but sat there and told my friend how I felt

  Sometimes I was in the same car over and over and liking

  sleep you knowOh that nothing can see tears that seem to

  prey (prey) that think yesAgain being all over everybody

  although I never weep I’m trusting youWith mornings in a

  sky a place further from me if I let this if I tell you I beg

  you do not go talking and telling my friendIt’s you

  I think everybody

  should like everybody.

  BURY IT

  m-hm

  bury it

  and then you’re not even

  sure I // I think if

  well

  well

  If something // something is either

  the burial is gonna have to be //

  m-hm

  gonna be safe

  or maybe even // maybe you can

  but it doesn’t seem

  possible m-hm

  Well,

  I really // I really

  don’t know

  BRUSH

  playing away against Sunshine the hinterland

  travel to the Minnesota hinterland

  22, 2009) – hinterland

  was found under a bridge in the old Coast hinterland

  burns in a large house fire in the Coast hinterland

  beaches and easy access to waterways and hinterland

  Hawks, Grade A games will

  for a rendezvous with a team

  Metals Inc. (TSX

  last year.

  . Fire crews raced to Camp

  the coast

  they’re travelling, and the Sun Coast hinterland

  hinterland

  burns in a large house fire in the Sunshine Coast hinterland

  properties from burning in the SunshineCoast hinterland

  Queensland state, with critical shortages in the hinterland

  five runs weren’t enough to stop the hinterland

  is ready to bring people into

  Metal, Inc. (TSX-V: HMI) has

  . Fire crews raced to Camp

  . The fire started at 1pm

  towns of Blackwater and

  Hawks from taking the lead in

  hinterland

  grave under a bridge at Boyland, in the Gold Coast hinterland

  Coast the house fire, this time in the Noosa hinterland

  to enable waterside properties in the desert hinterland

  scored forty-five against the hinterland

  honeythe British agency hinterland

  , in March last

  year. A single storey brick

  , and another vast

  Hawks on the weekend he and

  hinterland Travel bringing European

  grass fire at Hillview in the Gold Coast hinterland

  water that drains from a vast, sodden hinterland

  Coast first division cricket clash against the hinterland

  company currently offering tours of Iraq is hinterland

  included a new report on ‘hinterland

  series filmed in the rainforest hinterland

  hinterland. Two sheds and some fences were

  of moor into savage ravines

  Hawks was abandoned

  Travel, based in Brighouse

  hinterland Metals Inc. — Financial Analysis

  hinterland of the Gold Coast that Andre

  BURY IT

  and then you’re not even

  sure if it’s

  um if // if

  it can probably be put in

  reasonably // reasonable

  f
or what

  well

  well

  If something // something

  You see but the only problem is

  the burial m-hm

  and you cannot

  at least I don’t think

  I can or maybe

  even // maybe

  but it doesn’t

  Well I suppose it’s

  really // I really don’t

  STARLIGHT TOURS

  before the found found found when found has were likely

  his boy in in two in been and cop caused

  frozen found the an a more the forced guilty by

  body frozen north industrial north men north to of handcuffs,

  body frozen north industrial north men north to of handcuffs,

  was to industrial area Saskatoon were industrial defend unlawful the

 

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