by A C Warneke
She hadn’t known Jack had been aware of her nocturnal fantasies and she had felt an embarrassing amount of guilt for ever dreaming of another man. And then she had forgotten about the night all together because he was taken from her so soon after….
Focusing on a piece of grass by her feet, wide awake once more, she mumbled, “Did you… did you order his death?”
“Malorie,” he said deliberately, a wry, half-smile on his lips. “Did I not just finish telling you that I do not go about randomly killing humans?”
Her eyes swam with tears and as she looked up at him, seeing a man who had lost so much and loving him. Brokenly, the tears spilling down her cheeks, she whispered, “I’m sorry, Feryn; I’m so very sorry.”
He chuckled, the sound a little strained, as he stood up and pulled her to her feet, his movement perhaps a bit more rushed than before. “No worries, love; I’ve been accused of worse things, some even deserved. Are you ready to return to the compound?”
She nodded, miserable in the knowledge that Jack had killed Varick, had killed Feryn’s son; even if she hadn’t known his name at the time, she had known that Varick was innocent. Had she retained her memories, could she have prevented his death? Doubts and self-recrimination ate away at her; she didn’t know if she should tell Feryn; did he even want to know? He would hate her and she would be left with nothing. But if she didn’t tell him, it would always be there, destroying whatever time they had together.
“Feryn,” she whispered, barely any sound coming out of her dry lips. He stopped and looked at her, an inquisitive look in his expressive green eyes. She didn’t want to tell him…. “I think it was Jack.”
At his blank expression, she swallowed painfully, “I think it was my husband that… that killed Varick.”
His expression remained blank for a long time and she was afraid he hadn’t heard her; she didn’t want to say the words again. She didn’t have the strength. Carefully, his words slowly drawn out, he asked, “What makes you think that?”
She shook her head, feeling her eyes fill with tears, “I don’t know; it’s just…”
“It’s nothing,” he told her. “You weren’t there; you don’t know.”
“But….”
“Even if he did, Malorie, I know that you offered my son your blood,” he reminded her. “You share none of the blame.”
He was far more understanding than she would be under similar circumstances. Even so, she still felt as if the world was crashing down around her and there was nothing she could do about it except wait it out.
She had never felt so powerless in her life and she hated it.
Chapter 9
Feryn’s memories haunted her for the rest of the ride home and far into the night, long after he pressed a tender kiss to her forehead and told her he had some business to deal with. He had encouraged her to explore the vast compound but to be careful and then he had walked out of the room without looking back. He had been avoiding her ever since.
Maybe she shouldn’t have told him about Jack; even though he told her he didn’t hold her responsible, it was obvious it affected him. He had barely looked at her since she told him and all of her hand wringing over whether she was doing the right thing was for naught.
If he couldn’t forgive her, she would be expendable.
Later, as she lay alone and curled up in the middle of Feryn’s massive bed, it hit her: while she might be expendable, her father and son were not. The two males represented a new beginning for the Aradians; the chance to procreate and have children, the chance to survive for another generation, no matter how long each generation lived. For every Breeder born, the Aradians were that much farther away from extinction.
And Malorie was inconsequential; another female would eventually be born and he wouldn’t need Malorie at all. The thought of Feryn in another woman’s arms tore her apart, knowing that by telling him about Jack she had destroyed whatever chance they might have had. Yet, whatever happened, she wanted one night with him, to know if he could live up to her decade of dreaming about him, to physically know the man she loved just once. It was just going take a little bit of time to prepare herself to say goodbye
It was simply easier to avoid Feryn as well because if she saw him, she wouldn’t have the strength to let him go. The trick was going to be how to get Feryn to agree to her scheme; if he couldn’t stand looking at hew, how was he going to make love to her? Well, he was a male; surely she could entice him into bed? She would spend the time preparing to say goodbye figuring out the best way to seduce him.
The yearning was only made worse by the nights spent in his bed. Being surrounded by Feryn’s scent increased the intensity of her dreams, to the point where she would wake up aching for his possession and crying out silently in frustration, the sheets twisted around her slick body. She had to seduce him, to get him out of her blood if nothing else.
The time apart from Feryn wasn’t spent in vain, though. She explored as much as the interior of the fortress as she could, but was annoyed to find most of it was closed off to her. It wasn’t that she couldn’t break into any of the locked rooms; she just needed some more time and a strategy to disengage the security system. For being in such an isolated location, the security was surprisingly high-tech and elaborate, using biometrics and other highly personalized measures. It was going to take a bit of planning, and a lot of luck, to get through the locked doors, find her father and rescue him.
It also didn’t help that Jiro was a constant shadow, always following her and Toby, watching her with a hostile sneer, his lip curled in derision. He didn’t hold Toby in the same contempt, offering to teach the boy to fish or ride a motorcycle. Jiro was furious when Malorie told him Toby was too young to be riding a motorcycle. However, she had enjoyed watching the two of them trying to fish when it was obvious Jiro had never fished in his life. She wasn’t sure if his friendship with Toby was genuine or if he was just excited about future generations of Breeders.
With Jiro’s near constant presence, Malorie was slowly being driven mad. The man was deliberately cruel, making snide remarks beneath his breath every chance he got, usually at the expense of her ‘womanly charms,’ or the lack thereof according to him. She gave as good as she got but it was exhausting.
“I’m not surprised you only have the one child.” He fell into step next to her as she and Toby were taking another walk through the untamed woods surrounding the compound. She found them to be so peaceful, even with the constant buzzing of Jiro. “Did you actually find a guy willing to fuck you or did you have to pay him?”
Exasperated, she turned on him, forcing him to come to a stop or crash into her, which would mean, gasp, he’d have to touch her. “Why do you hover?”
He crowded into her space, getting as close as possible without actually touching her. Using the Aradian trick, he seemed to expand, taking up all of the space in the forest, compressing the air around her until she could barely breathe. His eyes glittered dangerously as he glared down at her, “If you were mine I wouldn’t waste all of my time trying to sweet talk my way in between your pretty, Breeder thighs; I’d mark you and fuck you, to hell with your reservations.”
She glanced down, relieved to see that Toby was busy studying a bug or something and that he wasn’t paying any attention to the conversation. Looking back up, ignoring the energy suffocating her, she smiled coolly. “I’m not yours and that’s the rub, isn’t it?”
He reached his hand out towards her neck, curling his fingers as if to choke her, but he didn’t touch her. She could feel the heat radiating from his skin but he didn’t get any closer. Drawing his hand back, he made a fist, letting his arm fall to his side; his aura also shrunk, letting her take a breath. “You’re an unmarked Breeder, for fuck’s sake. You should be wet just looking at me and yet you look right through me as if I’m not even there.”
His words shocked her and she fell back against a tree, grateful that it was there to keep her from falling. “Feryn’s no bett
er; he is strangely possessive of you and Aradians do not get possessive of Breeders; it’s illogical. Besides, I saw you first.”
“Ah, poor Jiro didn’t get to be the one to take the toy out of the box.” Absurdly, she fell back into the familiar teasing. It was easier than contemplating his words; Feryn may have been possessive of her but it was apparent that he didn’t want her anymore. And as Jiro said, though not in so many words, Feryn was the only one she wanted.
He smiled mockingly at that, slamming his palm against the tree next to her head and leaning in. There was enough sunlight making its way through the dense canopy that the diamonds sparkled with inner fire, adding to the bad boy image he was obviously trying to convey. “Does the toy want me to play with her?”
She couldn’t help it, she laughed. And was unable to stop. She pressed her hand against his chest when the strangest thing happened: he jumped back as if she had burned him. The laughter abruptly died as he looked around the forest, his eyes wide and panicked. “Don’t touch me.”
Malorie’s eyes widened in alarm as Jiro continued to act so strange, his face growing redder by the moment. Grabbing his head, he glared at her, “He better fucking mark you soon, otherwise even I won’t be able to stay away.”
“What do you mean?” her words were hushed as she watched the fascinating play of emotions on Jiro’s face.
“You’re an unmarked Breeder.” He repeated the words from earlier, this time emphasizing each one. “A fucking bitch in heat; every Aradian male in the vicinity feels it, even if they are unaware of what you are, that you’re even here. Your pheromones are wreaking havoc on all of the Aradian males. All of them.
“Gods,” he turned his back on her, laughing harshly. His body was tense, the muscles tight and unforgiving as he paced away from her. “Feryn never should have brought you here; you’re a fucking Breeder, you don’t belong in the midst of Aradians.”
It was starting to make sense, why the Breeders had been kept so far away from the Aradians; the powerful Aradians didn’t like losing control. Instead of being mature about it, though, they kept the Breeders as far away from them as possible, treating the mortals as a necessary evil instead of appreciating them for the gift they were. Her voice was low, impassioned when she told him, “Your kind should have treasured us before, instead of keeping us locked away like some diseased animal. This time I’ll make sure things are different.”
“You have no idea.” He turned around and looked at her, bewildered and angry. His brilliant eyes flickered down to Toby for a moment and Malorie was prepared to throw her body between them if necessary. But then Jiro laughed humorlessly. “I actually like the little bastard.”
A horrified laugh slipped past Malorie’s lips at Jiro’s reluctant admission. He turned his attention back to her, shaking his head in disbelief, “And under different circumstances, I would probably like you, too.”
“I can’t imagine any situation you would like me.”
“If I didn’t want to fuck you so badly my teeth ached with it, I could imagine quite a few.” His self-mocking smile was almost painful to see. “If I were you, I would lock myself in my rooms until Feryn placed his mark on me. You. Until Feryn placed his mark on you.”
“I’ll try to keep that in mind.” She didn’t know what else to say as he continued to pace back and forth, unable to break out and run. “Um, you don’t have to babysit me, you know; I can take care of myself and my son. I mean, if it’s that hard to be around me….”
Her skin went prickly hot as those words came out of her mouth; she had never expected to say something like that. The thought of being irresistible to the opposite sex was appealing when she was sixteen; but with a herd of aroused Aradians sniffy around, it was surprisingly less so. She only wanted one of them.
Jiro’s eyes dipped to her breasts for a moment and he groaned. When she looked down, she saw that her t-shirt did a very nice job of showcasing the cleavage she had, the cotton material lovingly cradling her boobs and making her skin burn hotter in awkwardness. “I’ve got to go take a cold shower. Just… don’t get into any trouble.”
As she watched him lope away, Toby came up beside her and slid his hand into hers. “What’s wrong with Mr. Jiro? He looks scared.”
Malorie actually giggled. Bending down until she was face to face with him, she took him into her arms and hugged him close, “Nothing’s wrong with Mr. Jiro that a bowl of ice cream couldn’t fix.”
Toby’s eyes lit up at the mention of ice cream and Malorie grinned; her son definitely took after her when it came to his love of ice cream. “What do you say to finding ourselves some ice cream?”
He nodded his head with extreme enthusiasm, making her laugh. With one more hug, she stood up, taking his hand in hers as they made their way back to the living quarters. She was going to take Jiro’s advice and avoid the male Aradians. Except for one and he blamed her for his son’s death.
How different would her life have turned out had she retained her memories of meeting Varick? Would she have been a willing Breeder pawn at sixteen? Had she never experienced the birth of her son, the past few years of peace? Would she have traded in her life of hardship and despair and loneliness for a meager crumb of affection from her Aradian lovers?
How many lovers would she have had before she became an empty shell? How many children would be taken away from her before she no longer cared, no longer felt anything? How many years would she exist before she could no longer stand being in the same room as herself and she took her own life?
She couldn’t bear the thought of any other Aradian besides Feryn touching her. If he could no longer abide the sight of her, there was nothing the Aradians could offer her that would entice her to stay. It was love and love alone that made her willing to be with Feryn, in spite of what it would mean. Her heart would beat for him even if he no longer wanted her; she just wouldn’t, she couldn’t, be with any other Aradian.
In the end, though, there would be no way for her to come out victorious; every road led to heartache and misery. If she had the ability, she would take Toby far away from this place, find a quiet piece of earth and shut the rest of the world out. She was selfish enough to consider leaving her father behind, knowing he was clever enough, resourceful enough, to save himself. But she wouldn’t leave him to suffer in his cage; she would find a way to free him, if he hadn’t already done so by the time she managed to mount a rescue operation.
Her grandfather had been born into the Breeder life and had turned his back on it, only to have it taken away when he wasn’t looking. He had managed to escape with his son, defying the extraordinary odds against him, and creating a new life for himself, albeit a very solitary life. Malorie didn’t want to be alone any longer, always on the move, always saying goodbye. Whatever happened, she wasn’t going to isolate herself from other people anymore; she was going to become a part of whichever community she finally decided to settle down in. Maybe she would return to the little quad-plex, ask Liese for her old job back, beg her if necessary….
Keeping an eye out for males, her plans for a future without Feryn racing in her head, she nearly crashed into the woman who had stepped onto the path. Perhaps she should have been a little weary of all Aradians because everything within Malorie stilled, sensing the dangerous predator that stood before her wearing an angel’s mask.
Pushing Toby behind her, shielding him with her body, Malorie erased all expression from her face. In a courteous voice, she murmured, “Forgive me; I didn’t see you.”
Almost at once she recognized the Aradian from Feryn’s memory; however his memory was far kinder than the reality. Though Taella was strikingly beautiful, with her long, inky-black hair, high cheek bones and full, red lips, there was something… off about her. The woman smiled but it didn’t sit right in her eyes, which were artificially bright and glowed with unholy fire; the life burning within her writhed in darkness and depravity. How could Feryn believe she didn’t suffer from vamp-madness?
&nbs
p; “It was my fault entirely,” the Aradian said affably, her smile widening to show off her gleaming fangs. Holding her arms out to the side, as if to assure Malorie she wasn’t a threat, Taella motioned towards a nearby bench. “Come, let us sit and get to know one another. I am anxious to meet Feryn’s newest pet.”
“I need to get back,” Malorie held Taella’s gaze and tried to show no fear even as her blood raced in her veins. “I promised Toby some ice cream.”
“Come,” Taella coaxed as her smile widened. “A few minutes are all I am asking.”
Warily, never letting her guard down, Malorie allowed Taella to guide her over to the bench, waiting until the woman was settled before taking a seat next to her and putting Toby as far away from the Aradian as possible on the narrow bench. Her muscles were rigid and she could feel her body preparing to fight or run, whichever one became necessary. Although Taella was relaxed and her manner friendly, Malorie couldn’t trust her; she created vampires.
“You are very pretty,” Taella purred, running a long, slender finger over Malorie’s cheek. It took all of her will power to keep from flinching from the cool touch
Taella continued to run her fingers over Malorie’s face, tracing the shape of her chin, the length of her nose, the arch of her brow. And through it all, Malorie kept tremendously still, afraid that any sudden movement would entice the Aradian into attack. Watching her hand move over Malorie’s face, Taella seemed to speak to herself in an absentminded voice, “There’s something different about you. You don’t give off the same vibes as the other humans; why is that?”
At that, Taella met her eyes and Malorie recoiled inside; death and decay lurked in the smoky brilliant depths. Why weren’t her eyes dull when it was obvious she suffered from vamp-madness? Flashes of Feryn’s memories played in her head and she remembered the cunning look in Taella’s eyes as she whispered honeyed words into Feryn’s ear, encouraging him to obliterate the other Aradians’ vampires, convincing him to spare her own. She had used his grief to get what she craved and in that moment Malorie knew the woman was very intelligent and very dangerous and deep into vamp-madness.
