Cheryl deliberated about that while Teddy Pendergrass’s smooth “Love TKO” filled the living room.
The three women rocked their heads back and forth.
“Awww. Man. That’s my jam,” Cheryl said, snapping her fingers and getting her groove going.
“Teddy P., Teddy P., Teddy P.,” said Johnnie as she got her own groove going. “‘I try to hold on, my faith is gone. Whooo.’”
Larissa got up from the floor and started dancing with an imaginary partner.
Not to be outdone, Cheryl and Johnnie climbed to their feet and started rocking their hips, as well.
Cheryl didn’t know who the other women were grooving with, but in her mind Xavier was rocking a mean two-step with his hands locked around her hips and his head pressed against the side of hers. With her eyes closed, she was sure she could hear him singing along, “Takin’ the bumps and the bruises of all the things of a two-time loser.”
Her heart squeezed. It was just too much. By the time the song ended and they all collapsed onto the floor, she had discovered another level of depression.
“We’re a hot mess. You know that, right?” Johnnie said.
“Yeah. But misery loves company.” Cheryl held up her spoon. “Thanks for being here, ladies. I appreciate it.”
Johnnie and Larissa tapped their spoons against hers. “Any time.”
Chapter 29
“You went into business with the man?” Kendrick thundered at his father in the back office of Ripped Gym. “What about me? Did you think that maybe I might want to go into business with my old man?” His face twisted in pain from what he thought was a serious offense.
Ricky pulled in a deep breath and shook his gray head. “No offense, son, but it’s not like you have a head for business.”
“How in the hell would you know? You’re too busy out here wishing that Xavier King was your son. Newsflash, I’m your son. I’m your flesh and blood. Not him! That asshole has a daddy.”
“Not this crap again.” Ricky sprung up from his chair. “I’m not in the mood to hear this today. I have things to do. I run a legit business.”
“Oh. So that’s it? You’re ashamed of me, Pop? Is that it?”
Ricky glanced away.
“Yeah. That’s it. I’ve made some mistakes in the past and you can’t get over it? You’re going to stand there and tell me that you’re perfect? How many families have you abandoned?”
“Look, Ken. I’m not proud of some of the things I’ve done or how many people I’ve disappointed—you included. But I don’t intend to spend the rest of my life—how much or little there is left of it—always apologizing for whatever grievances are riding your back for the day. The past is the past. It’s over with. I’ve apologized and now it’s up to you to accept it or toss it in the trash. I’m way past giving a damn anymore.”
Kendrick shook his head while staring at his father. “I don’t know how to reach you anymore.”
“Oh. If only that was true, my life would be so much simpler. My heart wouldn’t stop beating in the middle of the night when the phone rings because I’m scared that when I pick it up it’s either going to be some drug thug or gangster telling me how much you owe him and what they’re going to do to you if I don’t mortgage everything I own to save your precious limbs or your damn life.
“And I don’t want to hear another word about Xavier coming from you. That man has done a lot for me and you over the years. He deserves your appreciation, not your scorn.”
“The hell he does.”
“What?” Ricky’s eyes narrowed. “You really think he lost that fight to Forster back in ’04? Are you really that stupid?”
Kendrick’s eyes narrowed. “You said that you didn’t ask him to throw the fight.”
“And I didn’t. He found out about it somehow. He had to. I know that man just like I know you. And the only reason that he would have thrown that fight was because he thought he was saving me—which in turn saved your ungrateful butt. Why else do you think that he just up and walked away from his career? He couldn’t bear the thought of getting back in the ring after having thrown that damn fight. He gave up his dream—my dream—because you have daddy issues.”
Kendrick’s jaw hardened.
“I worry about you,” Ricky said. “I do, but I can no longer let you worry me to death. You are responsible for your life, your happiness. Stop looking to me for the love and approval that you already have—have always had. I have to let you live. I have to let you fall. That’s the only way that I’ll ever get the chance to see you pick yourself up again. Can you even understand that?”
“How can I ever prove myself when you’re always shutting me out? My getting involved here in the gym would have been the perfect opportunity for me to go legit if that’s what you’re concerned about. As it is, I made money the only way I know how—on the streets. The same streets that you left me and Mom to survive on, the same streets I got my education on. And now you want to stand there and act like you’re so ashamed of me.”
“I got to get out of here. We’re just going around in circles.” Ricky tossed up his hands and stormed out of the office.
“That’s right. Leave,” Kendrick yelled after him. “Just like you always do.”
Despite nursing one hell of a hangover, Xavier hit the gym at 5:00 a.m. that morning where he worked on his speed and threw punches. This was his element. This was where he thrived. His agility, footwork and coordination was still tight and he would be lying if he denied having the desire to test his mettle against the current heavyweight champion. He wondered whether he still had what it took to get in the ring again.
He continued shadowboxing around the ring while imagining the roar and cheering of a packed house at the MGM Grand. Wouldn’t it be nice?
“So you’re just walking away from me? Is that it?”
Xavier dropped his arms at the sound of Kendrick’s angry voice slicing through the gym. It was still twenty minutes before opening, so at least it was just him and maybe My’kael in the locker room who would hear the father and son going at it…again.
Xavier shook his head the moment the men came into view. He wanted to like Kendrick, but the brother made that pretty damn hard to do.
“Fine. Walk away. I’m sick and tired of dealing with you, anyway,” Kendrick continued.
He’s sick of Ricky? Isn’t that rich?
Ricky marched, shaking his head and looking like he wished his son would get off his back.
“Is everything all right?” Xavier asked.
“Damn,” Kendrick barked. “Can’t I have a private conversation with my father without your ass jumping into the mix?”
Xavier’s gaze narrowed. “Maybe. If you knew how to talk in a reasonable and respectable voice.”
“Ain’t this about a bitch?” Kendrick redirected his anger back to his father. “You see what I mean? You see how you let your fake son talk to me?”
Not this crap again. Xavier rolled his eyes and turned his back to the enraged man. One of these days he was going to give himself a stroke, blowing up all the time.
“A’ight. I’m going to squash this,” Kendrick declared. “I hope Sanford and Son enjoy this crappy hole in the wall. You, him, this place—ain’t never gonna be about nothing. Believe that!” Kendrick turned and marched off.
Ricky didn’t even bother to watch him leave. He just shook his head and sighed as if the weight on his shoulders was just seconds from crushing him.
Xavier walked over to the thick ropes around the ring and climbed out. “Don’t worry about it. He’s just blowing off steam. He’ll get over it.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.” Ricky shook his head. “The longer I live the more I’m convinced that loving is easy and forgiving is damn near impossible. Kendrick doesn’t have it in him to forgive me and I can’t convince him that I love him.” He shrugged.
Xavier felt for his old friend and reached out and patted him on the back with his gloved hand.
My’kae
l walked out of the locker room, bouncing and stretching his neck muscles.
Xavier and Ricky broke apart and flashed their potential star a smile.
“I hope that you’re ready to put in some serious work today,” Xavier said.
My’kael cocked a smile. “I can handle anything you toss my way, old man.”
Xavier blinked. “Old man?” He looked over at Ricky. “Did you just hear him?”
“Welcome to the Geriatric Club.” He winked.
“Boy, I ain’t that much older than you. Get warmed up. It’s me and you today.”
Both My’kael and Ricky arched their brows in surprise.
“We’ll see just who the old man is after you get this little ass-whooping I’m about to dish out.”
“Ooooh.” My’kael faked a tremor. “I guess I better get scared.” In the middle of laughing at his own joke, there was a knock on the front glass door. He turned and blinked. “Yo, man. Your girl is here.”
Xavier turned his head to see Cheryl in a formfitting gray workout suit.
“Want me to let her in?” My’kael asked.
When Xavier didn’t readily answer, Ricky spoke up. “Go ahead.”
Xavier’s gaze cut toward his old friend like Caesar toward Brutus.
Ricky shrugged his shoulders feebly. “She can see all of us. No point in being rude.”
My’kael opened the door and smiled. “Hey.”
Cheryl flashed the boxer a quick smile, but her gaze remained locked on Xavier by the boxing ring. Now that she had managed to get herself to drive back to her old gym, she could hardly remember the rehearsed soliloquy she’d come up with during the middle of her sugar high last night. That probably had a lot to do with Xavier standing there looking like a chiseled black god with sweat pouring down his body.
Just looking at him made her knees weak.
“Good luck,” My’kael whispered.
She glanced back over at him and he flashed her a sympathetic smile.
Cheryl finally forced one foot in front of the other and walked up to Xavier. As she drew near, she noted how a hard mask of indifference fell over his face while his jawline hardened and his eyes narrowed.
“Hey,” she said when she stopped in front of him.
Silence.
Cheryl swallowed, but somehow that just made the lump in her throat bigger. She cut her gaze toward Ricky and he quickly caught the hint.
“C’mon, My’kael. Let’s get you warmed up,” he said, strolling over to the young boxer near the speed bag.
Alone, Xavier and Cheryl looked at each other.
“So,” she started. “How have you been?”
Xavier shook his head. “C’mon, Cheryl. Let’s not do this.”
His words crushed her. “So. That’s it? You’re not even going to consider my side in this situation? You can’t even try to forgive me?”
He shook his head while his jaw worked silently.
“Then maybe I was wrong about you, too. The Xavier I’ve come to know wasn’t this hard, unforgiving man in front of me now. He was a man who loved hard and realized that people make mistakes. That people aren’t perfect. I’m sorry about how you found out, but I had every intention of telling you the truth that night. I have no proof other than my word. Take it—for whatever it’s worth.” She stepped closer to him. “When you told me why you’d walked away from your promising career just so you could protect someone you loved, it connected and resonated with me because…I had walked away from my career in order to be with you. That’s the part my ex-lieutenant didn’t tell you. I had turned in my badge because I couldn’t continue to deceive you.”
He closed his eyes. “It still doesn’t change the fact that the woman I thought I fell in love with doesn’t exist. If we took away what I thought I knew, you have to ask, What is left? Sex?”
“No. Love. Love is still there. Love is not facts on a piece of paper. It’s a feeling—a connection. And if you’re honest, then you have to admit that it was something that has always existed between me and you. The minute our eyes connected, I felt as if someone had punched me in the gut. Don’t tell me that you didn’t feel it, too.”
Xavier dropped his head. No way was he going to get that lie across his lips.
“I miss you,” she said earnestly. “I miss us. Don’t you?”
“Of course I miss you,” he said.
Hope finally penetrated her heart, but then it quickly disappeared.
“But I just don’t know how to go about trusting you. And what is a relationship without the foundation of trust?” He pressed his lips together while his eyes glistened with tears. “I’m sorry.”
Sucking in a deep breath while batting back her own tears, Cheryl nodded as she stepped back. “I understand.”
Silence.
“Well. At least I tried. I wish you luck.” Her voice cracked and she spun around and rushed toward the door.
A battle raged within Xavier as he watched her go.
“Remind me never to take advice from you,” Ricky said, walking up behind him.
“You don’t understand,” he said, turning away just before Cheryl walked out of the door. “I don’t understand?” Ricky laughed. “I don’t understand what it feels like when someone doesn’t want to forgive me for mistakes and bad decisions? Is that what you’re saying? What the hell were we just talking about ten minutes ago?”
Xavier’s resolve softened.
“I tell you what,” Ricky continued. “I admire that woman. It took a lot of guts to come in here and just put her heart on the line like that. To stand in front of a man like you emotionally naked like that. That’s something else I know about real well.”
“But I didn’t lie to her. How do I go about learning to trust her again?”
“One damn day at a time, kid,” Ricky said simply. “One day at a time.”
“So what did he say?” Dog Pound asked from the passenger side of Kendrick’s latest stolen vehicle.
“Exactly what I expected him to say—nothing.” Kendrick sat behind the wheel trying to cool off before starting the car and pulling out of the gym’s parking lot. But the argument between him and his father continued to loop over and over in his mind. “That damn Xavier King.”
“C’mon, man. Don’t start that again.”
“Why?” Kendrick whipped his head around to his cousin. “Are you still worshipping at the altar of His Majesty, too?”
“Man, I’m just saying that it’s not that serious.”
Kendrick’s jaw tightened while he shook his head. “What the hell do you know?”
“Damn, cuz. You act like you’re the only man out here that didn’t have a father coming up. My daddy was M.I.A., too.”
“That’s because he got locked up.”
“Same difference. He would be around if he didn’t do what he did, right?”
“Whatever.” He shook his head and caught sight of Detective Cheryl Grier exiting the gym. Kendrick continued to watch her as she rushed past his vehicle. “Humph.” A smile curled his lips.
“What?”
“Since Xavier took someone from me, maybe it’s time I took someone from him so he can see what it feels like.” He opened his car door.
Chapter 30
My’kael kept his eyes on his steady jabs against the speed bag, but that focus was broken suddenly when a scuffle outside of the gym caught the corner of his eye. “Yo, somebody is trying to grab your girl!” He raced toward the door.
Xavier’s breath caught as he dropped the gloves Ricky had just taken off of him and ran toward the door, too. Time seemed to stand still while the pounding in his chest was more painful than any punch that he had ever taken. His legs moved faster than they ever had and his brain churned with thoughts of what-ifs at an astounding clip.
What if he was too late?
What if she’s hurt?
What if she’s killed?
That last question came just as he burst through the door and tried to make sense of what hi
s eyes were seeing. Kendrick had his arm wrapped tight around Cheryl’s neck as he tried to drag her toward a car.
“What the hell are you doing, Kendrick?” Xavier barked, finally slowing down when he spotted the gun pressed against Cheryl’s temple. He didn’t look too good himself. Clearly, Cheryl had gotten in a few punches and scratches because Kendrick was bleeding profusely from his face and lip.
“I’m paying you back, man. What does it look like?”
Dog Pound climbed out of the passenger side of the car, raising his hands up in the air. “I ain’t got nothin’ to do with this,” he shouted.
“Kenny! What the hell?” Ricky shouted, finally making it outside into the light of early dawn. “Put that gun down. Are you crazy?”
“What the hell do you care? Huh? You got your favorite son there. He’s the one you love, right? He’s the one that you prefer over me. Mr. Gallant. Mr. Noble. Mr. Perfect.”
“Kendrick, that’s not true.”
“Shut up,” Kendrick yelled so loud that Cheryl winced and tried to jerk her head away. “What? How in the hell am I’m supposed to compete with you? Huh? You fell on your heroic sword and threw that damn fight. You walked away from a golden career to save my old man. Now you’re forever the hero and I’m the villain,” he roared.
To Cheryl’s credit, she looked absolutely calm as Kendrick kept trying to move her toward the car door.
“Oh, God, Kenny,” Ricky moaned, every ounce of his heartache echoed in his voice. “Don’t you see what you’re doing, son? This is no way to handle this. It’s between me and you.”
Kendrick shook his head. “It stopped being about me and you a long time ago, Pop. That’s what you don’t get. That’s what you refuse to understand.”
Ricky groaned. “What I don’t understand is what you want from me now? What am I supposed to be doing for you now?”
“You’re supposed to love me—more than him!”
Ricky moved up next to Xavier. “I do. And I even love you more than you love yourself. You just won’t allow yourself to see it.”
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