In the back of my mind, I understand this is for my own protection. I also realize he can’t discuss situations that put the people he loves at risk. Even if he wanted to disclose everything to me about his family, I don’t think I’d want to know all the details.
The relationship I have with Matteo is unlike anything I’ve ever dealt with before. I’m trying to navigate it the best I can. There are times when I wish I’d never found out about him so that I could have remained blissfully ignorant. But I know that sooner or later, reality would have reared its ugly head.
It was only a matter of time.
I often play a game of What If in my head. If I’d known who Matteo was from the beginning, would it have made a difference? Would I have steered clear of him if I’d known about his family? Would my attraction to Matteo been lessened if I’d allowed fear to control my feelings?
I doubt it.
I’ve never experienced this kind of desire. It feels all-consuming, as if it could swallow me whole if I don’t tread carefully. That scares me because I have no idea what the future holds for us. Or if we even have one.
The only thing I can do is take this relationship one day at a time. For the time being, that works. But I have no idea if that will be the case three months from now.
Or six.
Or a year.
Won’t all the secrets eventually put a strain on our relationship?
I haven’t forgotten that Matteo said his family is mostly legitimate.
I grew up knowing there was a right and a wrong. When I was in high school, I never strayed from the straight and narrow. I didn’t befriend classmates who pushed the limits or dabbled in illegal activities. I never wanted to do anything that would reflect poorly on my parents.
The world Matteo grew up in was nothing like mine.
Neither is the one he lives in now.
I question whether a relationship can work whenever I dwell on our differences. I don’t know if I can turn a blind eye to all the nitty-gritty details.
I’m so lost in my thoughts that I jump when Matteo wraps his arms around my shoulders and pulls me to his chest. He buries his nose in my hair. I’ve left it down the way he prefers it.
“Having second thoughts?”
I wonder if that question isn’t just about the party, but our relationship.
A guilty expression flickers across my face in the mirror. He notices it as well.
“You don’t have to accompany me this afternoon.” He presses a kiss to the side of my neck.
“I want to.”
There’s no way I would pass up an opportunity to peek into the world Matteo tried to hide from me. But I’m nervous. I want to meet his family, but it would be much less stressful if I knew next to nothing about them.
With unhurried movements, he caresses the curve of my neck with his lips, eliciting a moan from me.
“Matteo…”
My voice trails off on a lusty sigh. It boggles my mind just how much I want him. How easily he’s able to turn me on. We rolled out of the bed two hours ago after he did the most sinfully delicious things to my body, and already he’s able to stoke the flames of my desire to life with the simplest of gestures.
I never feel sated with Matteo. I always want more.
“Are you wearing panties?”
I laugh. Is he crazy? I’m about to meet his entire family. There’s no way I’d leave home without them. “Of course.”
“Take them off,” he whispers in my ear.
Eyes widening, I meet his dark gaze in the mirror. “What?”
My heart stutters in response when I realize that he’s not joking. Reaching around, he cups my breasts in his palms. I whimper as he plays with me.
“Take off the panties.”
When I hesitate, he says, “No one will realize. Your outfit is very ladylike. I want to know that you have nothing on beneath this very prim and proper dress you’ve chosen to wear.”
His talented hands slide down my ribcage and settle on my hips. Inch by inch, he gathers up my dress until my panties are exposed. Mesmerized, I watch in the mirror. His eyes are also focused on the silky material.
Or what lies beneath it.
When all the linen has been collected, Matteo transfers it to one hand, freeing up the other. He dips his fingers into my lacy panties, zeroing in on my clit. He rubs small circles over the tiny bud until my eyelids fall and my head lolls against his chest.
His touch drives me crazy.
There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to feel his hands and mouth on me. I would beg and plead. Cry for more.
“Mmmm, so wet. I think you’re much too greedy for the pleasure only I can give you.”
The thought has occurred to me as well.
It’s never been like this before.
I’ve never been like this before.
He torments me by manipulating that little bundle of nerves.
“Now, be a good girl and take them off.”
Through the fog clouding my brain, I understand how he’s trying to persuade me to do something I’d rather not do. “Matteo, no…”
“Yes.” He doesn’t let up on his ministrations as he buries his face in the side of my neck, gently nipping my skin with his teeth.
Gahhhhh.
I’m soooooo close to coming.
It’s there.
Right there.
Just a bit more...
I thrust my pelvis forward, wanting more. He pulls his hand away so that the pressure on my clit remains the same. When I whine in protest, he chuckles. “If you want to come, take off the panties. That’s all you have to do. Simple, isn’t it?”
I want to scream in frustration because we both know I can’t stay aroused like this until we get home tonight. I’ll go mad. I wiggle out of the underwear and kick them away. Heaving out a breath, I wait for him to finish me off. I’m so wound up that it feels like I’m going to claw my way right out of my skin.
“There!”
His lips curve into a satisfied smile. My eyes narrow. I’d love to slug him, but I’m much too focused on my own pleasure to take a swing.
“So very beautiful.”
My eyes shift to the mirror and I watch as he drags his fingers across my sensitive flesh. My clit pulses.
I need him to touch me.
A small whimper escapes before I can stifle it.
He kisses the side of my neck, nipping at my throat. I have no idea why that’s such a turn on, but it is. It jacks up everything inside me. I’m so distracted by his lips that it takes a moment to realize that he’s touching me everywhere but that one throbbing spot.
“Please, Matteo.”
His hooded gaze meets mine in the mirror as he lowers the front of my dress and smooths his palms over the material a few times to flatten the wrinkles. I stare in confusion. I’m on the verge of exploding and only his touch can push me over the edge.
With his hands resting on my shoulders, he turns me so that we face one another. I crane my neck to make eye contact.
He kisses the tip of my nose. “I don’t trust you not to put your panties back on before walking out the door. This will give me some assurance.”
“What!” I shriek in a voice so high it hurts my own ears. “You’re just going to leave me like this?”
My outrage seems to give him pleasure. “No, bella, I wouldn’t do that to you. Grab your purse and let’s go. It will take more than an hour to arrive at the compound. That’s plenty of time to make you come.” He gives me a wink. “Several times, if you’re a good girl.”
Grumbling at his underhandedness, I stomp off to find my purse. My core is pulsing with need. My legs are shaky. Narrowing my eyes, I glance over my shoulder and sneak over to the mirrored dresser. Inching out the top drawer, I grab a pair of underwear. One last look in his direction shows that he’s busy adjusting his cuff links.
I slip the panties into my purse. Had Matteo done what he said, I would have attended the party without panties. Since h
e broke his word, it’s only fair that I break mine in return.
The man is entirely too certain of himself. I want to knock him down a peg or two and show him that he can’t control me as easily as he assumes.
I give him a superior look from the bedroom door. “Ready to go?”
“Yep. One last thing to take care of and then we can leave.”
In my head, I’m smug.
Sure, my lady parts ache, but Matteo thought he could manipulate me into doing something he wanted and my pride’s not having it. Once we return home, he’ll realize his mistake.
Standing next to the bed, his dark eyes find mine. My libido jumps to attention. He crooks a finger. “Come here.”
I don’t question his motives. I move until I’m standing before him. Silently he lays his hands on my shoulders and turns me around so that my back is aligned with his front. He skims his hands over my arms before locking his fingers around each of my wrists. His body curves against mine. I feel the length of his erection as he bends me over until my hands are stretched out on the bed and my chest is pressed into the mattress. My heart flutters in response. I turn my head so that the side of my face rests against the comforter.
“Don’t move.”
He kisses my cheek and then his body disappears. A question hovers on the tip of my tongue when he flips up the back of my dress, exposing my naked backside to the cool air in the room. His hand slides over my ass. Eyelashes fluttering closed, I sink into the pleasure of his touch.
Crack!
My eyes spring open and I yelp at the sting left in the wake of his palm colliding with my bare flesh. He smooths his hand over the area he just smacked.
“The panties. Take them out of your purse.”
The slap has rendered me breathless. And exposed. I’m aware of the vulnerable position I’ve been stretched out into. Gulping, I say, “What are you-”
I don’t get the denial out before he smacks the other cheek. Fire ignites. I hiss out a sharp breath at the flare of pain before his fingers slide over the smarting area.
“Bella?”
“Okay,” I grumble. “I’ll take them out.”
“Good girl.”
I close my eyes as his hands stroke over my stinging backside. I won’t admit it to him, but I like when he spanks me. There’s something very dominant about it.
A groan bursts from my lips when his finger dips inside me. His touch is magical even when he’s inflicting pain.
“It turns me on to see my handprint on your ass. I like it,” he muses darkly. “A lot.”
I bite my lip, trying to stifle the whimper his words summon.
Sex with Matteo is light years away from the relationship I had with my college boyfriend. Eric now seems like an untried boy. After only a few months, sex between us became routine. Whereas everything Matteo does is new and full of untold pleasure. I’m eager to explore all these different facets with him.
I want him to push past all my limits.
I want him to touch me in ways that feel foreign, but exciting.
I just want… Matteo.
“This is exactly how I’m going to have you tonight. With your ass high in the air. By then, my handprints will have faded, and I’ll have to mark you again.”
His fingers glide across my clit. My pussy drips. I’m so turned on by the way he’s touched me. Even the spanks excite me. They make me ache in ways I didn’t imagine possible.
“Do you want that?”
Unable to lie, I say, “Yes.”
“Good.” His fingers circle one last time before slipping deep inside my sheath. I groan, bearing down against his hand.
“Turn over.”
I roll over onto my back, spreading my legs before he can tell me to. His eyes dart to my center and he licks his lips in anticipation.
“I’m hungry, bella. I don’t think I can wait for the limo.”
Neither can I.
My eyelids drift shut as his mouth settles on my pulsing clit. He gently suckles me, and I explode in seconds. A scream tears from my throat. Long after I crash back down to earth, Matteo continues to lick me as if he can’t get enough of my taste.
“Delicious.”
He gives my lower lips another long, slow lap with his tongue and lifts his head, piercing me with his gaze.
“I hope you’ve learned your lesson.”
I smile and stretch like a content cat lying in the afternoon sun. “I like your lessons.”
Chuckling, he buries his face in my softness and nuzzles my clit. “Yes, I can see that you do. I have a feeling you’re going to need lots of discipline. I’m more than happy to give it to you.”
I think I could live with his head between my thighs for the rest of my life.
“You have me all worked up. I hope you’re ready to return the favor once we’re in the limo.”
The thought of taking him into my mouth as we speed through the city is so sexy that I groan. “More than ready.”
Straightening his suit, he laughs and holds out his hand. “Then we should get going.”
Chapter Thirty-One
Matteo’s parents live about an hour north of Chicago. The cosmopolitan, bustling city with all its high rises and concrete slowly gives way to wide-open spaces scattered with red-barned farms as the limo travels down the highway. Trees in the middle of turning fiery red, breathtaking orange and deep, rich yellows dot the landscape. It’s an idyllic sight. I’m reminded of how much I missed the change in seasons while living in Seattle. Driving through the countryside during autumn is one of life’s little pleasures.
Leaving the freeway, we head east on country roads toward Lake Michigan until we turn onto a private road flanked by mature trees. We stop at the guardhouse to gain clearance. The driver speaks with security before the gate is opened, and we’re allowed on to the property.
I may have been distracted by Matteo before leaving the condo, and I was certainly busy reciprocating the favor on the way over, but now I’m reminded that Matteo’s family is unlike any other I have come across.
It’s one that has guards in place and takes security seriously.
As we roll toward the lake, the thick greenery opens to reveal a magnificent stone mansion nestled among lush, gently rolling hills that are perfectly manicured. The breath stalls in my lungs as I stare at it with wide eyes. I think Matteo referred to the estate as a compound. He wasn’t lying. It’s massive.
My parents came from money, and we had a very nice house here in Chicago and then in Seattle, and Dominic has a gorgeous house on the North Shore, but they’re nothing compared to the sight before me. I’m bowled over by the sheer size of it. It’s as if someone took a country manor house in England and dropped it down on this beautiful piece of land near the water.
“This is where you grew up?” I shake my head in amazement. I imagine it would take at least a day to explore all the nooks and crannies of this place.
“Yes. Welcome to the Valentini family compound.”
A shiver of apprehension skitters through me as the limousine continues to our destination. When we’re about half a mile away, I notice cars parked in the circular drive and along the side of the road. There’s at least forty of them.
“This house has stood for over a hundred years. During prohibition, my family used the lake for bootlegging. It was an easy place to hide liquor. The property was so far out in the country, that it was considered safe.” He smirks. “A hideout.”
“That’s really interesting.” I can picture the period in time he’s describing. Sure, it only took us an hour to drive here, but in the early nineteen hundreds, it would have taken the better part of a day. The estate would have been difficult to access.
He gives a little shrug. “There’s a lot of interesting history here at the house. Perhaps later, we’ll take a tour.”
I smile. “I would love that.”
My eyes fasten on to the house. I can’t help the nervousness bubbling up inside me. Matteo slips an arm arou
nd my body and pulls me on to his lap. The closer we get, the more massive and overwhelming the building becomes. Gently he presses his lips against my temple.
“Don’t worry. They’ll adore you.” He adds, “Just as I do.”
Is he crazy? Of course, I’m going to worry. I’m riddled with anxiety. Meeting someone’s parents for the first time is nerve-wracking enough without layering on everything else I know about them.
“Have you told them anything about me?” I have no idea what Matteo might have said. Maybe nothing at all. Maybe they think I’m nothing more than a random girl he’s bringing along today.
That thought makes my belly churn even more than it was moments ago.
“I told them that I was seeing a woman who is smart, beautiful, and strong.”
Surprised, I rip my gaze away from the house. “Is that how you see me?” I ask, looking at him.
It’s not how I view myself, especially with the toll the last two years have taken. Much of the time, I feel like a baby bird nursing a broken wing. As if I constantly have to fight through the pain just to push forward.
Just to persevere.
And yet, when I’m with Matteo, it doesn’t feel that way at all. The dull throbbing pain, the heartache that continually gnaws at me, falls away.
His brows furrow. “How could I not?” His fingers stroke over my face. “You’re gorgeous. You captured my attention from the moment I stepped onto the elevator. I couldn’t get you out of my head, no matter how much I tried. Even with all that you have lost, you’re still warm, ever willing to open yourself up to new things and take chances with your life. You’ve been to hell and back, but that hasn’t changed who you are at the core. You’ve moved across the country to start a new life. You’re attending a prestigious university, working toward fulfilling your dreams.” His eyes turn curious. “How could I not find all that incredibly sexy?” He sweeps his thumb across my lower lip. “As much as your beauty and strength turn me on, it’s what is up here,” his fingertips tap the side of my head before dropping to my heart, “and here that I find most fascinating.”
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