Rekindled Love

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by Susan Leigh Carlton


  Ben took his daughter and held her against his chest. Clara handed him the warmed bottle of milk. Nestled in his arms, she eagerly accepted it.

  “Ben, Martha Wilson lost her baby. Do you want me to see if she would be a wet nurse for Becky?”

  “If you don’t mind, I would appreciate it.”

  “I’ll see about it. She could stay here with the baby , if it’s all right with you.”

  “It will be all right. I can’t do the farm work and the baby too.” Clara exchanged a glance with Alice. A worried look fell over Alice’s face.

  “Ben, where do you want to lay her to rest?” Clara asked.

  “What? What do you mean?”

  “Where do you want to bury Jenny?”

  “I don’t want to put her in the ground,” he said.

  “Ben…” his father said.

  “Since there is no other family, Jeb and I decided we want to be buried on the hill where we can look down at Jen…. Where we can look over the farm and Becky,” Clara said.

  “Your Pa and I want to be side-by-side on the farm. We would like to have a small family cemetery in some shady spot. A place for all of our families to gather.”

  “We won’t be gathering anywhere,” Ben said. “We’ll all be dead. Like Jenny.”

  “I choose not to believe that. I believe she’s gone on ahead and will be waiting for us when we get there.”

  “Jeb, if you show me where you’re talking about, I’ll get Leroy and Seth and we’ll dig a place. We’ve got some wood and I’ll make a box.”

  “Doctor Coombs was going to ask the undertaker to come out. I’ll talk to the preacher. We’ll decide when to have the services, and let the neighbors know, but it needs to be soon. Ben, will you help me with this?”

  There was an awkward silence.

  “He’ll help,” Ike said.

  Chapter three

  The Final Prayer

  Two days later…

  The body was laid out in the front room. A steady stream of neighbors and church members had come to pay their respects. Each brought food, so the family wouldn’t have anything to do.

  Ben had returned to his farm and not been back since the day Jenny died. Alice sent his brothers after him. They found him lying on the bed, eyes open, and staring at the ceiling. He was still wearing the same clothes. Leroy took hold of his arm and yanked him to a standing position.

  “You stink to high heaven. Did you shit yourself? You are an embarrassment to the memory of your wife, her family and our family. You disgust me.” He shoved him back to the bed.

  “Leave me alone,” Ben mumbled.

  A hulk of a man, Leroy threw Ben over his shoulder with hardly any effort. “Seth, see if you can find some soap and fetch a brush from the barn.”

  He carried Ben to the creek that ran close by the house and threw him in. Sputtering, Ben stood. Seth tossed him the bar of soap. “Wash yourself. You can do it or we will do it. I guarantee it will be easier if you do it, because I won’t be easy about it.”

  “Neither will I,” Seth added.

  “It’s cold,” Ben complained.

  “Then you had best get on with it. When you’re clean, come back to the house. If you’re not, then Seth and I will give you a bath using the currying brush.”

  Twenty minutes later, a shivering Ben returned to the house. “Get dried off and change into some clean clothes,” Leroy ordered. “Then you’re going to take care of your animals and we’re going back to the Stevens’. You have some apologizing to do and a funeral to attend tomorrow morning.”

  “You got no call treating me like this. I just lost the most important thing in my life.”

  “Then act like it, damn it,” Leroy roared, “not like some simpering, snot nosed crybaby. I always thought you had more grit than this. The first time life throws something hard at you, you run away and hide instead of facing up to it. You’ve got a daughter that needs you.”

  * * *

  Ben entered the Stevens’ house with Seth and Leroy close behind in case he decided to bolt.

  “She’s in the front room,” Clara said.

  His mother and father were there too. His mother had a worried look while his father’s look was one of disappointment or disgust, Ben couldn’t tell which.

  He approached the coffin his father had made. Jenny was laid out in her prettiest blue dress; the one Ben liked so much. Her eyes were closed, and her face serene. He began sobbing.

  “She’s not there,” his mother said. “She’s in heaven.”

  Ben touched one of the hands that crossed her chest, and withdrew it quickly. “She’s cold,” he told his mother.

  “It’s the embalming fluid,” she said.

  He turned away. “Has Becky seen her?”

  “No, we decided it best not to let her.”

  “Ben, the services are tomorrow morning. The preacher will be here and she’ll be buried where Clara said. You will be there.” It was not a question. “Do we have to have Seth or Leroy make sure? We will do that, if necessary.”

  “I’ll be there,” he said.

  “Will you stay with us tonight, or will you stay here?”

  “I want to stay with Jenny,” he said.

  “Do you promise you won’t do something stupid?”

  “I won’t.”

  “I think I’ll ask Seth to stay with you,” she said.

  “That isn’t necessary,” Ben said.

  “He’ll stay.”

  The next morning…

  Clara walked into the viewing room. “I have some coffee and breakfast in the kitchen; y’all come eat. People will start showing up around ten. The coffin will be sealed at ten-thirty and the services at eleven.”

  “I’m not hungry,” Ben said.

  “How long has it been since you ate?” she asked.

  He didn’t answer. Seth gripped his forearm. “When someone asks a question out of concern, it’s common courtesy to answer,” Seth said, tightening his grip.

  “I don’t think I have since I brought her here. I don’t remember.”

  “He’ll eat something, Miss Clara,” Seth said. “You will eat,” he said under his breath.

  * * *

  Ben stood by the coffin, stealing glances at Jenny’s body and greeted the mourners as they arrive.

  It was time. “Do you want to say a last goodbye?” his mother asked. He nodded. “We’ll leave you,” she told him.

  Ten minutes later, he opened the door. His face was streaked, but his eyes were dry. His father closed the door, and the undertaker sealed the coffin.

  The undertaker’s hearse was brought to the front. Ben’s brothers and two others loaded the coffin into the rear of the hearse. The undertaker took up the reins and moved at a slow pace to her final resting place.

  The preacher stood on the back of a wagon, his bible in hand. He raised his hands skyward and said, “Let us pray.” The prayer was short as he asked God to take Jenny into his arms. He read several scriptures, followed by a few words.

  “It has been but a few days since Jenny walked among us with all the vigor of life, and the buoyancy of youth, full of hope and love. Who of us could then have thought that such as this would happen so soon? If we had been told that death would take her away so soon, we would not have believed it. Jenny is in a better place, leaving the living hearts to mourn her loss, while she has passed beyond the sorrows of earth into the arms of our blessed Savior.”

  The church choir ladies sang Abide With Me, followed by the preacher who gave the closing prayer.

  The mourners drifted away, leaving the family. Ben stood graveside, watching as his father, brothers and Jeb Stevens lowered the coffin into the open grave using the ropes they had placed beneath the coffin. As the sound of the clods of earth striking the coffin reached his ears, it was all Ben could do to resist jumping in with her. The grave was filled and the remaining dirt mounded on top. A stone had been ordered, but had not been ready in time.

  “Let’s go,
son,” his mother said.

  “I want to stay with her for a while,” he said.

  They left him sitting on the grass, his hand resting on the mound. He was still there hours later when darkness fell. The next morning, there was no sign of him.

  Chapter four

  War

  Ohio was not a slave state, but Kentucky, its neighbor across the Ohio River was. Abraham Lincoln was elected President of the United States on November 6, 1860.

  “Trouble is coming,” Philip Simpson, the principal of the New Concord Elementary School told Caroline Andrews, one of his teachers after classes ended when the news of the election arrived.

  “What do you mean, there’s going to be trouble?”

  “In my opinion, there’s going to be a war,” he said.

  “That would be terrible.”

  “It would, I hope it doesn’t come to pass, but it doesn’t look good. If you listen to the talk in the barbershop, and read the newspapers, you would see what I mean. Ever since Dred Scott, three years ago, it’s been simmering.”

  “Would you go?”

  “I would have to. It would be my moral responsibility.

  * * *

  December 23, 1860

  Philip had accepted the invitation to spend Christmas with Caroline and the Andrews family. She and her father went to the depot to meet him.

  The train bringing Philip huffed and puffed its way into New Concord. The depot was a small one-room combination telegrapher’s office, baggage claim and ticket office. Most of the trains passing through New Concord did not stop, but merely whizzed through without slowing.

  The steel wheels locked when the engineer braked in front of the small board platform that was the waiting area. Sparks shot from the friction of the steel on steel and steam hissed from beneath the boiler on the engine. The train ground to a stop. One passenger stepped from the train. Ten minutes later, the conductor waved his arm above his head and the train jerked into motion once again, heading for Zanesville and Columbus.

  “There he is,” Caroline hurried to meet him. She welcomed him with a kiss on the cheek. “Our wagon is over here. It was too cold for Mom, so she stayed home.”

  “You didn’t come alone, did you?”

  “No, Dad is with the wagon. How was your time at home?”

  “It was good; my father had a lot of questions about my school and the teachers. Mom had a lot of questions about you.”

  “Me? She had questions about me?”

  “She wanted to know if you liked teaching, where you got your training, whether I was serious about you or not.”

  “I would like to hear the answer to that last one.”

  He acted as though he hadn’t heard. “Mr. Andrews how are you?”

  “I’m well; thank you for asking. Caroline has been looking forward to your visit.”

  “I’ve been looking forward to it as well. This is my first Christmas away from home. Another new experience for me.”

  “It will be for us, too. We’ve never had company for Christmas. We’ve never even had company except for kin.”

  “Here we are. You kids get out of the cold. I’ll take care of the animals and be there in a few minutes.”

  The aroma in the kitchen was from the holiday baking Mrs. Andrews had in the oven. “Mm, it smells good in here. Mrs. Andrews, it’s nice to see you again. Thank you for having me. I’m looking forward to sharing your Christmas.”

  “You’re most welcome. It’s nice having you. Christmas is my favorite time of the year and having you here makes it extra special.”

  “Caroline, see if Philip would like some coffee or tea.”

  “Coffee is fine, if it’s already made, but don’t make any on my account.”

  “We almost always have coffee on the stove this time of the year. Papa likes it when he comes in from outside,” Caroline said. “Would you like anything in it?”

  “It’s fine this way.”

  She poured herself a cup of tea from the kettle on the stove. “Let’s take them to the front room.”

  “You ignored my question,” she said after they were alone in the other room.

  “I didn’t hear a question; did you have one?”

  “Never mind. It wasn’t important anyway.”

  “You said you had never been out of New Concord; then you’ve never ridden on a train, have you?”

  “I haven’t.”

  “It’s a great experience. When you realize you can go to a place more than a hundred miles away in about three hours.”

  “You can get to Cleveland that quickly? It sounds scary.”

  “It isn’t. You can look out the window at the countryside you’re passing. It’s a lot more comfortable than sitting on a wagon. It’s kept warm by a stove at the end of each car.”

  “That’s incredible. I’ll have something new to tell the children when school starts back.”

  He sat looking at her, a bemused smile on his face. “You have beautiful eyes. They sparkle when you smile, which isn’t often enough by the way.”

  “Thank you. I don’t hear compliments very often. I smile when I’m happy or amused, or in the classroom. I always try to smile for the class. I want them to know I enjoy them.”

  “They know that, just from your attitude. I’m going to tell you a secret about teaching. Never underestimate the students. They know a lot more than you think they do. It’s hard to put anything over on them. They’ll catch the insincerity every time.”

  Her father joined them. “The wind’s come up. We might be in for some snow.”

  “It would be nice to have snow for Christmas,” Caroline said.

  “We have snow almost every Christmas in Cleveland,” Philip said. “I guess it’s caused from the lake.”

  “Caroline, why don’t you see if you can help your mother? I’d like to get acquainted with Philip.”

  “I think I will go see if I can help Mom,” she said.

  “Good idea.”

  “She has a great sense of humor,” Philip said.

  “She gets that from her mother. I’m a fairly serious person, myself.”

  Chapter five

  Your Intentions

  The Andrews Living Room…

  “Philip, I love my daughter. She thinks I wish she had been a boy, but it’s not true. I couldn’t ask for a finer child. As her father, I’m concerned for my daughter’s safety and wellbeing. I would like to know what your intentions are toward her.”

  “I understand. I can assure you I have only the most honorable intentions toward Caroline. I care for her a great deal, but I feel we need to get to know each other better before we go further. Caroline worries about her future as a teacher. I’ve assured her it is not jeopardized no matter our relationship.”

  “That’s good to hear. I appreciate your frankness. You understand I only have her best interests in mind. I don’t want her to get hurt, but Charity and I won’t interfere. She has to make her own choices.”

  * * *

  “Let me show you to your room, Philip. Dinner will be ready by the time you get settled.” Caroline announced. “There’s a wash-basin in the room.”

  “You’ll be in the room at the end of the hall. Mother and Dad are here, and I’m across from them. If you need anything, let me know.”

  “Thank you, Caroline. Oh, I do have a question. Have you ever been called anything other than Caroline?”

  “When I was a little girl, Dad called me Carrie. Mom has always used Caroline.”

  “Would you mind if I called you Carrie?”

  “Not at all. I’d like that. Dinner will be ready when you come back down.”

  “Philip, we’re planning to go to the Christmas Eve services,” Charity said. “We would love for you to go with us, or if you’d rather, I’m sure Caroline can find a book for you to read.”

  “I want to go. I could have read at home.”

  “Good. It will be cold; I hope you have a heavy coat.”

  “I’m good.”r />
  After the services, Mrs. Andrews made hot chocolate. A few minutes later, she said, “I’m tired. I’m going upstairs. I’m glad you went with us tonight.”

  “I’m glad I went. Goodnight, Mrs. Andrews, Mr. Andrews.”

  Caroline snuggled against Philip. “The fire feels good, doesn’t it?” she asked.

  “It does. You make it warmer, too. I’ve given this a lot of thought since we changed our compromise.”

  “This sounds ominous,” she said.

  “Some might think so, but I hope you don’t. Caroline, I love you and would like for you to be my wife. Will you consider it?”

  Tears welled in her eyes. “You want to marry me?”

  “I do.”

  “I think that’s what you say at the wedding, but yes, I will be your wife.”

  He kissed her. “Want to tell your parents tonight or wait.”

  “Let’s wait until morning,” she said. “When?”

  ‘Would it be too long to wait until school is out?”

  “That’s a long time away, but it would give Mom time to do what she would have to do. I would also have a chance to meet your parents.”

  “It sounds like we have a plan,” he said. “Now if only a war doesn’t get in the way.”

  The next morning…

  “Mom, last night, Philip asked me to be his wife. I said yes.”

  “That’s a big step. Are you sure you’re ready to take it?”

  “Our plan would be to get married after the end of the school term. That gives us time to get the planning and everything done.”

  “That sounds sensible. What about the age difference?”

  “He’s almost six years older than I am. He told me his father and mother have about the same difference in their ages”

  “Every mother’s dream is to see her child happily married. I’m no different. When are you going to tell your father?”

  “It sounds old fashioned, but I think he’s going to ask Dad for my hand.”

  “I don’t think it’s old fashioned at all. I think it’s romantic. Is he romantic?”

 

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