by C. M. Owens
She just grins a little more as she leans a hip against the counter and takes another slow sip of her coffee.
“You’re being judgmental,” she finally says very seriously. “Give the guy a chance. We’re taking a break from our real selves, remember? That’s what this trip is all about. That and getting to know the woman we had no right to snub our entire lives. Remember those cathartic tears the night of our joined epiphany?” she says, doing that manipulative thing she usually does so well.
“Drug dealer,” I remind her.
“When alcohol was going through prohibition, the bootleggers went down in history. Currently, our country is in sort of the same situation with marijuana. It’s a small, family-run, backwoods sort of setup. Not the Cartel, Piper. We have more skeletons in the family closet than either of them,” she says, still manipulating me.
“Don’t forget the cougar he’s apparently keeping up with his drug money. The presumably older woman they referred to in name as Cougar.”
“If the woman in question is okay with being nicknamed Cougar, then who are you to judge their presumably open relationship and their labels?” she points out.
“You can’t reason everything. There has to be boundaries without sounding like a judgmental shrew,” I loudly whisper in that oxymoronic way, as I do some very dramatic gesturing with my hands.
“Fine. Do whatever you want. I’m doing what we said we came here to do.”
“We didn’t say we were coming to screw some agricultural mountain men,” I remind her very dryly.
“Hale happens to have his own YouTube channel where he hosts game tutorials and stuff. No social media, though. It’s set up under his sister’s name, since she’s the one who created it for him originally without realizing how it’d grow. He makes a modest living off of it that he enjoys immensely,” she tells me with a growing smile. “He loves the perks of getting to play a lot of the games early and all the free stuff some of the gaming companies send his way.”
I slap my forehead. “Why are you smiling?”
“He’s just so different from literally every single person I know. It’s…cute.” Her eyes flit to the side like she’s thinking of something, her smile only growing. “He and his siblings built their own cabins with the help of some of their friends, including Kai, and their aunt and uncle.”
What else can I do but simply stare at her? She’s not making any sense.
Then my eyes widen when she just seems to stay in lala land, thinking about whatever else it is she’s thinking about that has her in this smile-lock.
“You really did just stay up and talk,” I state in slight disbelief.
“It’s amazing how much you find interesting when you’re not actively seeking something to be wrong,” she says in that prim way of hers that keeps her from ever sounding like she’s doing anything wrong, irresponsible, or highly dangerous at all.
“What was in that weed? You’re a way bigger bitch than me,” I remind her very seriously.
She shrugs unapologetically and glances toward the bedroom door, where the overnight guest is lightly snoring, before looking back at me.
“I’m not going today. At least one of us should be around to tell the search party where to find the trusting city girl who wanted a sexy mountain man to tell the girls about back home,” I state defiantly as I cross my arms over my chest.
“Bitch,” she chirps as she walks with a little extra sway in her hips back toward the room. “Tell Kai yourself when he comes to meet us.”
“You tell him. I’m going for a ride so that I can avoid the ‘trying to talk me into it’ portion of the morning,” I say as I pull on my coat, boots, scarf, gloves…
I’m surprised she’s still standing there and watching me by the time I finish dressing for the snowpocalypse outside.
“What should I tell them that won’t ruin everyone’s fun?” she asks, lips thinning like she’s genuinely disappointed in me.
“I’m sure Hale’s great. Kai is already entangled in one undetermined-relationship status,” I say diplomatically, not sounding like an ass just because I don’t want to go.
She simply stares expectantly, and even gives me an impatient sigh, before glancing at the clock on the wall.
“Tell them I have altitude sickness and I’m going to get checked out,” I finally say as I turn and walk out, ignoring her judgmental eyes.
She’s the one judging me, and I’m not judging them. I’m just making a personal freaking choice.
It’s a lot harder to stop being a douche when your sister is using unreasonable logic.
Since I’m bundled up enough to use the snowmobile Reese rented, I do. And I drive really, truly, laughably slow because I haven’t driven one since I was sixteen.
I’m still unsure where exactly the property ends, and the survey guy is apparently a joke around here, because he literally carved an x on trees to mark our property lines. Apparently the surrounding area all belongs to Kai Wilder’s family, if I understood him right last night.
Took me ages to figure out the ‘survey system,’ just before I saved and ate Bambi on back-to-back days.
The trees can’t possibly be accurately placed in exactly all the right spots our property reaches, so I have no idea if I’m trespassing or not as I slowly wind through some of the trees.
I startle when something moves, and I look over just as a fox or something darts out of sight.
“Not cool,” I say under my breath as I continue to drive at a crawl.
What’s the worst sound in the world when you’re out in unfamiliar woods on a snowmobile? The sound of a motor sputtering as your snowmobile suddenly shuts off and refuses to crank again.
“No. No. No,” I say in a slightly panicky tone.
Over and over I try turning it on, but…all I get is a gargled response from the worthless piece of shit we rented just yesterday…
What the—
“How am I out of gas?! We just filled it up and have barely even used it!” I snap, finally spotting the reason for my demise.
The low fuel sign is on, and the gage is below the E. Is that what I heard last night? Did Reese and Hale slip up and raise hell outside the cabin? I thought I dreamed that.
Damn it.
Damn it.
Damn it.
Smashing my hand to my forehead, I whimper and groan, and then I peer between my fingers around at the woods.
The snow has started falling a little heavily, and I’ve clearly gone farther than I realized. The tracks I forged while coming in here are already being covered up. And…my phone has no signal.
Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
I’m so screwed.
Maybe I can catch a bar on my phone if I get really lucky.
Abandoning the snowmobile, I hop off the ride and my feet kick up pounds of snow, even though these boots are supposed to be epic snow boots.
They don’t feel so epic right this—
A vicious growl cuts off my inner whiny bitch, and I jerk my head over to the thick, bare trees. Just a hint of tan fur catches my eyes before it disappears.
A sick feeling knots in my stomach as my knees lock in place, making it damn hard to take off in the dead sprint I want to.
Please don’t be a hungry bear. Please don’t be a hungry—
A loud, terrifying, heart-pounding, gut-wrenching warning is released from the creature stalking me, and I realize it’s not a bear.
It’s worse.
It’s a big cat of some sort. Cats toy with their prey. It won’t even be a swift and merciful death.
Another sound comes from behind me, and I whirl around, seeing large, fresh footprints way too close to me. This cat got right up behind me, and I didn’t even know it.
A tear falls from my eyes as I look around to see where it’s gone, but the loud, hellacious, horrifying battle cry is what kicks my fight-or-flight instincts into overdrive and free will is stolen from me.
My legs move on their own, and I take off like a gun h
as fired at the starting line.
The snow crowds my way, holding me back, and I cry out when I crash to the ground at the same time a roar sounds from way too close from behind me.
My heart pounds so hard that I’m worried it’s about to leap out of my chest.
The only thing my mind has on it is survival, even as I struggle up from the snow, ignoring my screaming muscles as I run, stumble, and fumble my way out of the woods.
Maybe the fact that cats terrorize their prey will work out in my favor. Sometimes a mouse gets away.
Right?
The scent of smoke has me taking a turn, along with the cat screeching in the direction I was running. Another battle roar has me crashing into a tree when I try to turn.
A startled cry escapes me, but I grit my teeth and charge toward the strong stench of smoke.
I burst free from the woods, just as that tan fur flashes by me. A scream tears from my lips, since there’s a cabin just in front of me.
“Help! Someone help me!” I shout as loud as I can, my voice hitting a higher pitch than I’ve ever hit.
The cat finally comes into view as it hops up on the porch, and my eyes widen as it growls and snarls, flashing its sharp teeth.
“Be careful! It’s on your porch!” I yell as the door swings open. “Look out! Don’t—”
My eyes widen, and I feel nothing but breath-seizing panic when I realize it’s Kai who is stepping out, brow furrowed in confusion as he stares over at me without seeming overly freaking concerned about the wild beast that trots toward him…
The cat starts rubbing its head against his leg like it’s a motherfucking pet or something, and Kai leans over, talking sweetly to it.
“I guess you felt like helping me recover my missing date,” he says with a daring little smirk on his lips. “Good girl.”
A full body-shuddering breath escapes me just before I go limp all over, the adrenaline fleeing my body in one bold rush. I drop to the snow, my knees hitting first, as I stare in disbelief at the sight before me.
I pant for air now that I realize how exhausted I am.
Kai scratches the cat under its chin, and the beast all but leans against him like it’s the greatest feeling in the world.
“Y-y-you have a mountain lion for a pet?” I ask on a shaky, unsure tone.
“She’s a cougar. I told you about her last night,” he says with a frown. “Did the weed fuck you up that much? I’ve been building up a tolerance for a long time. I forget what it’s like to be a weed virgin,” he adds.
This is my morning? How did this become my morning? Usually my mornings consist of waking up and grabbing my chai latte on the way to work.
Not running for my life from my date’s pet.
“This is Cougar? The cougar named Cougar?” I ask incredulously.
How the hell was I supposed to take that literally when he confessed it last night?
“What the hell did you think I was talking about?” he asks just as incredulously, moving down the steps toward me, his eyes raking over me.
I look a mess now that I’ve wasted my time running from his pet.
Kai reaches down to help me up, and I slap his hand away. The cat hisses and snaps at me from the porch, and I quickly grab his hand, use it to heave myself up, and practically hug him for protection. My heart starts pounding all over again when the not-nice kitty growls.
“Cougar, knock it off,” he says dismissively to the wild animal he seems to think is tamer than it is. “She’s harmless,” he assures me.
Now I wonder if she really was going to eat me.
I bet she will the next time I’m out in public. She doesn’t seem even a little bit harmless.
My feet suddenly leave the ground, and my breath startles out of me as my body gets lifted very abruptly. Kai smirks down at me as I gawk up at him, and he carries me through the snow like it’s an easy task.
“Fuck’s sake. How much weight have you packed on in less than a few days?” he says through strain.
My eyes widen in horror, but he suddenly barks out a laugh, which turns my horror into a lethal glare. For whatever reason, I almost smile.
“Kidding. We’ll blame the snow for your extra weight,” he adds, which…makes me horrified again.
Do I really feel that much heavier?
He drops me to my feet on the porch, and…Cougar immediately growls at me.
I climb Kai like a fucking tree real damn quick, and he chokes back a sound as my legs wind around his waist and my arms go around his neck.
“Don’t let her eat me!” I say way too loudly, given how close my mouth is to his ear.
“Can’t. Breathe,” he says through genuine strain.
It takes me a second to realize my arms are squeezing around his neck too tightly.
Releasing him a little, I bury my face against his neck, scared I may accidentally make eye contact with Cougar and she’ll perceive it as a challenge. Her feral claws are scarier than my manicured ones.
My only line of defense is the ability to have a chillingly cruel comeback on the tip of my tongue. I don’t think Cougar will care what I have to say.
His hands land on my ass when I start to slip, and I don’t even mind it, because Cougar would probably look at my ass like a tasty treat. It’s best if it’s covered.
He walks us inside, and when his hands fall away to shut the door and flip on the light, I slide down his body, glancing around.
It’s not the same cabin as before. This one doesn’t have dead animal heads adorning the walls. A few rifles and shotguns are haphazardly propped in a corner, and that’s about the closest to decoration there is in here.
There aren’t any bearskin rugs, nor is there as much furniture. In fact, there’s one big recliner, a small-ish couch, and…that’s all the furniture in here. They’re both sitting directly in front of a TV that has about three or four gaming systems attached to it.
It also reeks of weed.
Total bachelor pad, clearly.
He walks into another room, disappearing from sight, as I stare down at my dripping clothes. My teeth start chattering when the chill sinks into my body.
It dawns on me that I bailed on him, and I’m sure he knows that, since they were supposed to meet up and leave…an hour ago, according to the clock on his oven.
Sheesh. I really did run around in the woods for a long time, but it felt so short. Possibly because time flies when you’re running for your life.
He emerges from the room, and he gestures over his shoulder.
“You can change into some of my sweats, and then I’m gonna take you to town for something to eat,” he states like this is something we’ve discussed and agreed upon.
I almost argue, and then Cougar flashes through my mind. Will he send her after me if I refuse? Surely not. He seems more like a hero than a vicious guy. He could just be pretending, though.
For reasons I don’t really understand, I find myself walking into the room without protest, absently smiling to myself. That’s it. There’s something in the water that makes people around here crazy.
I never should have had a drink from the tainted well, because now I’m putting on a guy’s sweats and planning to go eat with him after standing him up for our sledding date…
“Hey, why didn’t you go sledding with the others?” I ask through the door as I hurriedly pull on the pants…and roll them down a few times because they’re a mile too long.
Sadly, they’re not all that big in the waist. He has a six-pack, and he’s not all that bulky, so I’m not going to freak out about the fact his pants fit me this well.
Not at all.
That’d be shallow and artificial of me, after all…
“Because I figured you just wanted to spend time alone with me. Imagine my surprise when you ran to my house screaming for me and using my cat as your excuse,” he answers, sounding entirely too serious.
“That’s not seriously what you think happened,” I state, slightly worried he�
�s really that delusional.
“Don’t be embarrassed. I like crazy chicks,” he assures me.
I blink a few times at the door as I drop my wet shirt to the ground. It slaps the ground next to the wet coat I’ve already discarded. I should have dressed more appropriately for snow, but I was planning on riding. Not running and falling and splattering on the ground so much.
A shiver runs through me, reminding me I’m cold and need to finish.
Pulling on his sweatshirt, I’m pleased to find it doesn’t smell like weed. In fact, it actually smells really good.
The door swings open while I’m sniffing the collar of the sweatshirt, and Kai eyes me as a smile grows across his face.
“If you want to smell me, just ask. Don’t use my shirt as a proxy when the real thing is a willing man,” he says with that wide smile.
I feel my face flame. Also, I can’t ever tell if he’s serious or not. Surely no guy is this confident.
Clearing my throat, I drop the shirt, smiling tightly.
“Any more pets I should be scared of?” I muse in deflection.
He shrugs a shoulder. “There’s Count Chocula, but—”
“Seriously? Count Chocula?” I ask, needing to know if this is a joke or not.
His right eyebrow arches. “He’s not so friendly, so don’t let the name mislead you. He doesn’t come around the homesteads, though. Just don’t go past the red tree markers, and you shouldn’t ever run into him,” he adds.
I don’t even know what to say.
It’s as though there’s an entirely different language out here than back home, and I’m afraid I’m going to sound like the douche I’m trying not to be if I have any comment at all to the maddening lunacy that spews from these people.
“Okay then. Lead the way to food. I’m officially starving, and your cat tried to kill me. I feel like you at least owe me food,” I tell him, ensuring he knows this is not another date.
“I’ll put your clothes in the dryer. I have a bunch of coats by the door. Go pick one out,” he says, eyes raking all over me like I’m something worth looking at in a pair of black sweat pants and a blue hoodie.
He continues smiling as I walk by him, and I glance back as he comes out of the room with my wet clothes, moving toward another room. I don’t know if I’ve ever met anyone like him, to be honest.
