by June Francis
For Better, For Worse
Cover
Title Page
Part 1 July 1934–December 1934
Chapter 1 Liverpool: July 1934
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13 Liverpool: December 1934
Part 2 December 1934–1936
Chapter 14 Southport: December 1934
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22 Liverpool: September 1935
Chapter 23 Liverpool: January 1936
Part 3 1939–1941
Chapter 24 Liverpool: February 1939
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27 Liverpool: January 1940
Chapter 28
Chapter 29 Liverpool: December 1940
Chapter 30
Chapter 31 Liverpool: February 1941
Chapter 32 Liverpool: March 1941
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35 Liverpool: September 1941
Part 4 1944
Chapter 36 Liverpool: May 1944
Chapter 37 Oxford: June 1944
Chapter 38 Liverpool: June 1944
Chapter 39 Liverpool: September 1944
About the Author
Also by June Francis
Copyright
Cover
Table of Contents
Start of Content
Part 1
July 1934–December 1934
Chapter 1
Liverpool: July 1934
Twenty-year-old Grace Green wiped the tears from her damp cheeks as she neared the stop at the Pierhead. From here she could catch a tram that would take her to West Derby Road and then walk on to her father’s house in Lombard Street.
Her aunt, Polly, and her daughters, Marion and Beryl, had wanted Grace to return with them to their Wavertree home in south Liverpool. It was a house Grace knew well, having stayed there a fair amount since she was five years old, when her mother, Hope, had died from influenza in the 1919 pandemic.
Earlier that morning, Grace had been with her aunt and cousins at the port to bid farewell to their brother, Dougie. Polly did not want her son to leave Merseyside, and the atmosphere at the dockside had been strained, even before Grace’s father, Norman, had surprised them all by turning up. Norman’s dredger had just docked after a long night’s work keeping the channels open between the sandbanks in the Mersey, and he’d only managed to get to the docking bay for the Australian-bound steamer just in time. In a rough manner, Norman had wished Dougie success, adding that he looked forward to hearing how his dead wife’s nephew found Sydney, given that it had been quite a few years since he himself had set foot in the city himself.
‘You’ve never mentioned having been to Australia before,’ Dougie blurted out in surprise.
‘That’s because my memories of Sydney are ones I prefer not to talk about,’ said Grace’s father with a strange, twisted smile.
‘So, why are you mentioning it now, Dad?’ asked Grace sharply. Her nerves were already on edge with Dougie’s imminent departure, without an added complication.
‘It’s to put me off, isn’t it?’ Dougie said.
His uncle shook his head, tight-lipped all of a sudden. ‘You’re of an age when you should have more sense than I had when I was there.’
‘And what is that supposed to mean?’ asked a curious Grace, wondering if this finally was the real reason why her father had been so against her emigrating with Dougie. Maybe he had taken against Australia as a place. It might explain why Norman had refused his permission for them to marry so vehemently – despite Dougie mooting his plans to emigrate with Grace more than eighteen months ago.
In exasperation, Dougie had turned to his mother and asked whether she had known what had happened in Australia. Polly shook her head quickly. ‘But I do remember Hope telling me that she’d met a sailor who’d just returned from Australia—’
Suddenly, Norman spoke up again. ‘That’s right, just before I met Hope, I had been taken on as a fireman on a new ship called the Medic – of the White Star line. It was the summer of 1899. The ship had tons of refrigerated cargo capacity, which included space for thousands of frozen carcases from Australia or New Zealand and there were berths for 350 third-class passengers, too! Quite a thing at the time. I remember she had four great masts and one funnel, with bunker space for enough coal so that she didn’t have to take on any more during the voyage. She called in at Las Palmas and Cape Town, South Africa, and then various ports in Australia and New Zealand…’ He paused, to be interrupted by his nephew.
‘What speed was the Medic capable of?’ Dougie asked, intrigued by the details, he had grown up by the docks, after all.
‘14 knots per hour cruising speed,’ Grace’s father replied instantly. ‘Depending on the weather – baring accidents on the ship – the trip to Australia would take approximately a month to six weeks.’
‘So, you’d have been away for at least two months,’ mused Dougie.
Norman nodded. ‘And that’s why I never did the Australia run again,’ he said abruptly.
Grace looked at her father closely – she was determined to have the whole truth out of him, that evening if necessary, about what had really happened in Australia. So far, she had accepted the excuses Norman had given for refusing to agree to a marriage between Dougie and herself. She knew she was still young, and that Dougie was her first cousin. Although, she was inclined to believe that the nub of it was that Norman would miss her too much if she moved to Australia with a new husband. She was all he had left since her mother had died.
Her aunt Polly had told Grace that Norman had been a lost soul, truly heartbroken, when her sister had died. This was despite him spending most of their marriage away at sea, she had also confided cattily, suggesting that perhaps some of Norman’s grief might have been down to guilt. Polly had sided with Norman, though, when he had spoken out against Grace and Dougie marrying. Polly agreed, utterly against her son emigrating.
* * *
It had been obvious to Polly for years that her son and niece were fond of each other, but she had chosen to believe that her son just felt very protective of his younger, pretty cousin, who, in turn, clearly hero-worshipped him. Then during the summer months there had been an outing to New Brighton and even Wales; her uncle and aunt had gone to Southport and Marion and Beryl had also gone out, by late morning it began to cloud over and Dougie had suggested they stay home and cuddle on the sofa and listen to the radio in peace. Almost before she realised it Dougie had undone her blouse buttons and was fondling her breasts. Grace told him to stop, that it was wrong, but he had said he loved her, and it was what lovers did. He had pushed her down on the sofa and pushed up her skirts. She had told him no but he had forced himself on her. She was mortified when she heard the key in the front door and he had rolled off her, clutching himself as she began to button up her blouse. Her aunt had come in first and it was obvious to Grace it had come as a terrible shock to Polly to find them in such a situation. She had dragged Grace to her feet and hustled her into the back kitchen and told her that it was sinful to lead her cousin on, as well as where it could lead. Later Grace had heard her aunt scolding Dougie for not seeing that his young cousin was besotted by him and didn’t realise what she was doing. Grace had waited for him to take the blame for what had happened but all he
had said was that he wanted to marry Grace, and that she was unlike any other girl that he had been out with and that they loved each other. He planned for them to leave Liverpool, so Polly and Grace’s father would never again interfere in their lives.
From her aunt’s behaviour in the weeks that followed Grace was convinced her aunt blamed Grace completely for stealing away her son’s affections. Once Polly had realised how things lay, she had attempted to keep them apart, but what with Grace being her sister’s only child, and Norman going away to sea at the time, she obviously felt that she had no option but to continue to allow her niece into her home even when she was sixteen and old enough to care for herself. Although, once Norman got a job on the Mersey dredgers, at Polly’s instigation, she made sure that her niece, who was nearly eighteen by then, was packed and back in her father’s house as quickly as possible.
As for Grace, she had only begun to find her older, blond, cousin attractive when she became aware that Dougie, five years her senior, had started to look at her differently. She had just turned sixteen at the time, and had blossomed in such a way that the local youths now competed to take her to the flickers or to step out for a walk with her. Grace enjoyed the attention, but her head wasn’t really turned. Then one day Dougie told one of them, Syd, a kind boy from down the road, to scarper just as he was about to kiss her on the doorstep for the first time. Grace had been annoyed, and told Dougie in no uncertain terms not to interfere as she liked Syd, only for Dougie to punch him on the nose. Later Dougie had told her that he was only protecting her because he cared about her. But then, at Christmastime, she remembered how Dougie had kissed her tentatively, and then with passion, under the mistletoe. After that he started to take her to the flickers regularly and held her hand in the dark. He also took to standing at the top of the backyard when she scurried down to the outdoor lavatory in the dark, kissing her lightly on her return, saying that he was watching out for her in case any of the lads who fancied her sneaked over the wall and took advantage of her. She was flattered at first that her strong, handsome cousin should care for her safety so much, but then she started to realise that the boys that she liked began to avoid her.
Come the following spring, she began to question how Dougie really felt towards her and she felt confused. Although, in the beginning she had thrilled to his kisses, she no longer did so in the same way, and sometimes felt wary about his forceful attentions. She realised that he acted as if he owned her, cutting her off from not only the boys’ company she enjoyed but also some of the girls she had known at school. One of whom had told her that her cousin probably found her easy game living under the same roof and her innocence such a change from the experienced women he went out with sometimes. Grace had never spoken to that girl again, thinking so little of her own attractions that she could not blame her cousin for being attracted to women his own age. Fortunately, she still had a friend in Milly who lived in the same street as her father and who was married and expecting her first baby, but Grace was too shy and embarrassed to talk to Milly about her confused feelings for Dougie.
She could not help recalling, too, the argument she had with Dougie when they were window-shopping one evening in town not so long ago; she had pointed out a dress she liked and planned on buying it with some of the allowance her father had given to her aunt for her. He had said that she would be wasting her money as the style was too fussy and girlish for her and she was old enough now to wear the one with the lower neckline. She had immediately recalled how he had slipped his hand down the front of her dress and touched the curve of her breasts. She had been shocked because she had never forgotten her aunt warning her about boys who would try touching her in certain places, and she must always dress with decorum and not to lead them on. Dougie’s behaviour spoke to her in a negative way and besides she resented him insulting her taste and wanting her to dress in such a way that her aunt would never trust her again to shop for herself.
He had been furious with her when she had told him she would spend her money on what she wanted and if he did not like it, then he would just have to lump it. His handsome face had twisted and reddened with anger and he had flung the words: ‘I thought you loved me and if you did then you would want to please me.’ She had replied in retaliation: ‘That works two ways and besides which I’m sure your mother and my dad would say I’m too young to know what love is about.’
‘But I’m not,’ he had said, ‘and it’s because I’m older and I love you that I know what’s best for you and want to guide you in the way that’s best for both of us.’ He had pulled her into his arms right there on the street and pressed her against him and kissed her as if determined to make her submit to his will. It had been both terrifying and thrilling, but she had felt angry as well and eventually she had kicked him in the shins and once she had breath, she had told him that she hated him and stormed off and went straight to bed when she returned to her aunt’s house.
The following day she expected him to cut her dead, as it was what she had decided to do, but instead as he passed her chair at the breakfast table, he dropped a kiss on the top of her head and then sat opposite her and stared at her.
‘Did you have a good night’s sleep, Gracie?’
‘Yes, thank you.’
‘I thought you must have been tired from the grumpy way you behaved last night,’ he said. ‘Even though, I didn’t sleep very well because my leg hurt so much, I’ve decided to buy you a necklace to go with that dress I liked.’
‘I’m not buying that dress,’ she said icily.
‘But you’ll look lovely in it,’ he said. ‘I’ll even give you some money to go towards it. You can wear it on the ship when we go to Australia.’
‘Australia! What are you talking about?’
‘Emigrating. There are plenty of jobs out there and the wages are higher. I could buy us a house and we won’t have Mother and your father interfering in our lives.’
Grace thought about what she had heard about Australia and although it had sounded attractive with its beaches and plenty of wide open spaces with plenty of room for large houses and gardens, she loved Liverpool and her father and besides she’d need his permission to marry Dougie.
‘We’d have to get married before we could go, and I doubt Dad would give his permission.’
‘We could get married when we get there, Gracie,’ said Dougie.
‘No way,’ said Grace. ‘Anyway, I don’t know how you can suggest such a thing after the row we had last night. I can only marry for love.’
His expression darkened. ‘I know you said you hated me, but I don’t believe it. Just think of all the fun we’ve had together and our first kiss under the mistletoe, you can’t say you didn’t enjoy that!’
‘No, I can’t,’ she said. ‘I was only young then and you’re so handsome, I felt like Cinderella and you were Prince Charming.’
‘Well, there you have it,’ said Dougie triumphantly. ‘You know how that story ended… happily ever after.’
Grace remembered thinking how at the time she had thought the story ended at the wedding. ‘Let’s drop the subject,’ she said. ‘Dad will never agree.’
Dougie shook his head. ‘By hook or by crook, we’re emigrating to Australia and you’ll marry me.’
Grace shook her head and draining her teacup she left the table, undecided whether she was glad or not that her aunt and cousins had not been at the table. Her uncle Douglas had already left the house for work.
The following Saturday, Grace had gone into town and bought the dress she had liked and noticed that the dress Dougie had wanted her to buy was gone. She wore her new dress for church the next day and expected Dougie to change his mind about how she looked, but he kept quiet despite her aunt, Marion and Beryl admiring it.
The following weekend, the whole family had been invited to the engagement party of the son of her uncle’s brother. When Grace went upstairs to change, she found the dress Dougie had wanted her to buy on her bed. For a moment she tho
ught that perhaps her girl cousins had chosen it when they had gone shopping for something to wear for the engagement party. Grace spoke to Beryl, the younger cousin about it, only to be told that Marion had bought it at Dougie’s insistence, having told her that Grace had liked it but hadn’t enough money to afford it, and he was buying it for her as a surprise.
Grace could not help wondering why he would tell a lie.
Marion who had just entered the bedroom, said, ‘I must admit I was surprised as he’s always broke, what with him enjoying a flutter on the gee-gees and always borrowing money from Mam.’
‘He shouldn’t have bought it. Perhaps I could return it and get his money back?’ murmured Grace.
‘It’s a lovely dress,’ said Beryl, fingering the artificial silk. ‘You’ll look lovely in it.’
Marion sniffed. ‘Don’t kid her. It’s too old for her.’
‘You’re just jealous,’ said Beryl.
Grace looked at the dress and tried to imagine Dougie’s expression when he saw her wearing it and she realised she did not like being out of friends with him and wearing it would please him. He beamed when he saw Grace enter the room and as soon as he was able, he seized her arm and led her out into the garden.
‘Admit I was right and give me a kiss as if you mean it, there’s a good girl. I spend good money on it and it was worth every penny.’
‘Did you have a win on the gee-gees?’ she asked, looping her arms around his neck.
‘How did you guess?’ he teased. ‘Now kiss me.’
