An Honest Mistake

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An Honest Mistake Page 14

by L. Grubb


  “I need to find her,” I say with conviction, swinging my legs off the bed. Determination clouds my judgment on how dangerous this could be, but I need her. I need to get to her.

  I try to stand, but Cobra’s calloused hand pushes down on my shoulder, effectively seating me straight back down onto the bed.

  “We’re already on it, princess. All the men are working on finding out where they have her. I promise you, we’ll get her back.” His face is close to mine, and I breathe in his musky scent, calming me instantly.

  I slump in defeat, resting my eyes on his chest.

  “I want to help,” I whisper.

  “I know you do, Alexis. But you don’t know these men like I do. If you go in raising hell, you’ll be seriously hurt, if not killed. I can’t live with that. I need you, princess. More than you even know.” He cocks his head to the side and lifts my chin so we’re staring at each other in the eye.

  A timid smile crosses his lips before he leans forward and brushes them against mine. He pulls back, looking at me once again.

  “I’m sorry I’m such a fuckwit,” I say to him.

  He frowns at me, his dark eyes clouding with anger. “Don’t you ever apologize for something that isn’t your fault, Alexis. You’re not a ‘fuckwit’ as you say, whatever the hell that is. You’re beautiful, strong, independent and loving.”

  I flinch at his harsh tone, cowering away from his intense scrutiny. “Then you don’t know me as well as you think you do. You don’t know my past. The past that ruined me. I didn’t think I could let another man in, ever. Not after…” A strangled sob escapes me before I have a chance to swallow it down. Fuck.

  “Shh, it’s okay. Let’s go back to our room instead of here. It’s smells like a damn hospital in this room.”

  I chuckle lightly, realizing he’s right about the smell. “You’re right, it does.”

  I stand on shaky legs, grabbing hold of Cobra’s arm for support as we walk through the open door.

  “Fuck this,” he murmurs before scooping my up in his arms and carrying me to the bedroom.

  “I have legs, I can walk,” I protest, struggling in his hold.

  “You’re going too damn slow.” He glances at me briefly before focusing on the task of opening the bedroom door while I’m still in his arms.

  We walk in, me in Cobra’s arms, and he kicks the door shut with a bang behind us before carrying me over to the bed. I scoot up and rest against the headboard before he pulls the comforter over me. He clambers in beside me and pulls me against his chest, stroking my back with expert fingers.

  I sigh in contentment, feels so damn good. I put my hand to his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat strum against my fingertips.

  “Tell me,” he whispers, barely audible.

  “Tell you what?” I reply, lazily, enjoying the feel of the slight tickling on my back.

  “Your past,” he says in a stronger voice.

  “What do you want to know?” I sigh in defeat. He may as well know, right? I take a few steadying breaths, fighting the clawing panic rising in my chest. I hate talking about it, hell, I hate even thinking about it.

  “The ex that seems to have scarred you for life.” He appears to say this through gritted teeth. No idea why, I have been quite open with him and jumped in head first to be with him. I gave him no reason to suspect I had shit in my closet from the past.

  “Riley. Well, Riley was my high school sweetheart. He proposed to me the night of prom. It was romantic, perfect even. He took me to the lake by the hall where our prom was and got down on one knee, proclaiming his love for me under the twinkling stars. I said yes, I was head over heels for him. Now I think back, I’m not sure why I found him so appealing. He was tall, slim with shaggy, mousy brown hair and brown eyes. He was normal. We didn’t plan to get married right away, and I now thank my lucky stars we didn’t.” I shiver at imagining marrying him.

  “He was amazing, attentive, loving, everything I wanted and needed. After graduation, we moved in together, a cozy little apartment overlooking the ocean. A few months down the line, he started drinking. And boy did he drink.” I pause and swallow, the remembered smell of booze drifting up my nose, curdling my stomach.

  “Keep going. I got you, princess.” He kisses the top of my head before continuing his soothing strokes up and down my back.

  “He started throwing verbal abuse at me daily, ordering me around like a puppy. I loved him so much I did everything he told me to do. He made me dress like a frumpy old lady so no other man could leer at me. He told me if I ever even thought of straying from him, he would gut me like a fish. He would force me to have sex with him, he was rough and controlling and made me bleed from the force a few times. It didn’t stop there. He brought a dog collar and leash, put it on me and paraded me around the neighborhood like a pet. I was thoroughly humiliated with bruised knees and tear stained cheeks. No one said anything, no one called the cops. He got away with it like he did many things in his life.

  “A year down the line, the beatings started. He’d hit me where no one could see the bruises. A few times he hit me so bad, to the point I had to be taken to the ER with internal bleeding. He always told them; ‘she’s clumsy, tripped and fell down the stairs.’ But I stayed with him, hoping he would change.”

  The tears are streaking down my face in sheets, nausea is rolling around in my stomach as I tell the story.

  “Babe,” Cobra says, choking on the word.

  “I haven’t finished,” I say in a strong voice, totally not portraying how I really feel. “He always apologized and preached how he would change. He never did. Instead, he got worse. Started giving me black eyes, threatening me with knives and guns. I’d finally had enough and decided to pack some shit before he arrived home from his parents’ house one day. I was just hefting my suitcase down the hall from our bedroom when the front door crashed open. Riley looked from me to my suitcase before screaming at me, calling me a whore, slut and a few other stronger expletives. He…he…” I stop to take in a deep breath, willing myself to calm down. “He stabbed me, eleven times. Luckily, they weren’t serious, but I pressed charges. He now rots in a jail cell, but I still look over my shoulder when walking down the street. I still hear his horrid abuse and smell the cheap booze he would drink.”

  “Alexis…” Cobra chokes out.

  “Story of my life.” I shrug, wiping my eyes with my arm.

  I move and look up at him, at his tears for me, rolling down his chiseled cheeks. “Don’t cry for me, babe. The past is the past, but you wanted to know.”

  I wipe away his tears delicately with my thumb before leaning up and pressing a soft kiss to his moist mouth.

  “I’ll never let another motherfucker hurt you, princess. Believe me when I say I’d kill them.”

  The fury in his eyes as he looks at me is terrifying, but I’m not scared of him. I know Cobra would never hurt me. Don’t ask me how I know, I just do. I love him.

  I smile at him, showing him I’m okay and weirdly, I am. It’s like a weight has been lifted.

  “I’m sorry I never met you sooner, princess.”

  I feel him slump against me, wrapping both arms around me and holding me tight.

  This is where I need to be. Right here, in Cobra’s comforting embrace.

  “I love you,” he whispers into my hair.

  “I love you too, Dom.” I snuggle in closer, gripping his shirt with my hands.

  Words can’t show how much I truly feel for him. In such a short time, I feel like my world has collided with an alternate universe. To a lifestyle I never really knew existed.

  “VP!” we hear from outside the door before it comes crashing open, cracking the wall behind it. “Church room. NOW!”

  Cobra scrambles off the bed and rushes to the door. Stopping abruptly, he turns and says, “I’ll be back in a bit, okay?”

  I just nod and motion for him to go.

  I lay back on the bed, chewing my lip nervously. Have th
ey found Lauren? Will they save her in time? Many thoughts come at once and it gives me a headache. I rub my temples in a lame attempt at relieving the pressure.

  I get up and decide to have a hot shower, hoping that will keep my melancholy thoughts at bay.

  Cobra

  “We may have the whereabouts for Lauren,” Prez says as soon as I’m seated in my usual chair. “We have the location coordinates, but it doesn’t look like this will be an easy rescue, son.”

  I shuffle in my chair, restless. “When do we head out? We need to get to her.” My voice is shaky, but I’m thinking of Alexis, she needs her friend.

  “We need an air tight plan for this, brother. This is dangerous.” Prez glares at me, warning me with his weathered eyes.

  “Everything we do is fucking dangerous, Prez! We never plan hard for our runs!” My voice booms across the quiet room, all the brothers staring at me with wide eyes.

  “Because we don’t have as many men as they will have over there. We need to wait for the other chapters to come in, son,” he replies, eerily calm.

  “How long?” I say through gritted teeth. How much longer will Alexis wait? How long will it take for her resolve to crack completely?

  “A week at the most.”

  I shake my head at this, fucking ridiculous! Can’t they just fucking fly in?

  “She’ll be dead by then,” Champ screams across the table.

  I look at him, completely forgetting he and Lauren had some sort of ‘thing’ going on. He looks like he hasn’t slept, the bags under his eyes are a big giveaway, the bloodshot eyes and the extra stubble showing his tiredness at the whole situation.

  “She won’t be. The Hell Riders want something, they’ll hold out, I assure you. They’re more mouth than they are action.” Prez looks defeated, not completely believing his own words.

  “We don’t know what they want! They haven’t given us even the slightest clue as to why they’re doing this,” Flipper pipes up from the other end of the table. “We need to act now, think later.”

  “That’s just not gonna happen, boy. Not this time. There is a life at stake, and my God her death isn’t going to be on mine or this club’s fucking conscience!” His voice raised to an ear deafening level, and we all shrink back into our seats. “The plan we had in place isn’t going to cut it for this. Now we know where she’s being held, we have to come up with something different.”

  So we set to work on planning how the rescue will take place. Champ is murderous, he’s out for blood, and he won’t let anyone stand in his way of getting his girl back. I see it in his eyes, his tense posture and fisted hands. He’s out for the kill.

  When Church is over, two hours later, I head back to our room to check on Alexis. Finding her curled up in a ball in bed, sniffling, I rush to her side and pull her onto my lap.

  “Shh, baby. She’ll be okay. We know where she is,” I whisper to her, stroking her soft hair.

  “Where is she? Why are you not out to bring her back?” She springs upright, staring at me through puffy eyes. She’s a mess, and I have no idea how to make her feel better, how to get that pretty smile back on her face. I’m not good with shit like this.

  “We have to wait for our other chapters to come in before we can go get her. We have a plan in place for when they eventually arrive. But, it could be up to a week from now, princess,” I tell her, lowering my eyes through guilt that I can’t do more right this fucking second.

  “A freakin’ week! She could be de…dead in a week, Cobra!” she screams at me, eyes wide with horror.

  “She won’t. They want something from us. We know that much.” I look at her, my eyes full of compassion. “I’m sorry, princess. If we go in now, we could all die. Every last one of us. There is more of them bastards than there is of us.”

  The tension that had her coiled tightly, releases and her shoulders sag in defeat. Nodding her head in agreement, she says, “I understand, it’s just frustrating. I need her, she’s been my constant since Riley.”

  “I know, princess, I know. We will get her back, I promise.” A frown forms between my eyes. Why the fuck did I make a promise that I don’t even know if I can keep?

  “I trust you,” she whispers, barely audible. I take her back in my arms and shimmy down the bed to lay back comfortably.

  “Try get some sleep, Alexis,” I murmur to her, staring at the yellow tinted ceiling.

  It doesn’t take her long to fall asleep, I soon hear her soft snores and the breathing even out.

  I pull her gently off my chest, laying her back down on her side before getting up to go for a cigarette.

  One last look at her and I am fucking determined to get her best friend back in one piece.

  I don’t want to leave her on her own, but I need a stiff drink and a smoke. Making my way into the loud main room, I head straight to the bar, ordering a whiskey.

  “Finally got her claws out of you long enough to join the land of the living, handsome?” Brandy says through fluttering lashes. Is this girl for fucking real right now?

  “Fuck did you just say?” I glare at her through narrowed slits, daring her to say it again.

  Her eyes widen in horror at my reaction before clumsily turning back around to grab my drink.

  When she comes back to me, I grab her arm in a tight grip and yank her toward me. “You know the rules about the way you speak about Old Ladies, Brandy. Don’t you fucking dare mess with me,” I spit out in her face, venom lacing each of my words.

  I push her away roughly, grab my drink and head for the patio doors, anger surging through my veins.

  I shake off a hand that grabs for my shoulder and walk out the doors, breathing in a lungful of the crisp morning air. I welcome the wispy dew of moisture landing on my face and continue to trek to the other end of the garden where I can, hopefully, be left in peace.

  I sit on the grass by the small pond, watching the fish scamper away from my sudden presence. I place my tumbler next to me and scrub my hands up and down my face, willing the scowl that has a permanent place to fuck off.

  Brandy had no fucking right; vile, nasty little bitch. Club whores know not to approach Old Ladies, back talk them or bitch about them at all. She knows the rules better than most, she’s fucking been here long enough. She’s damn well lucky that she’s a girl.

  I spit to the side of me, realizing I was chewing my lip as I taste the metallic tang of blood.

  I think I have a rough idea of why Lauren is where she is, of why the Hell Riders have her. My past is slowly coming back to bite me in the ass, and this isn’t going to be pretty. No one knows my darkest secret. A secret I’ve been harboring since I was sixteen.

  Until recently, I had no idea what the Hell Riders had meant on the beach, but it slowly clicked and made my blood run cold. Guilt rises like a nasty case of heartburn in my chest, choking me.

  What will the Prez do once he finds out it’s because of me that the Hell Rider’s are slamming us? Will he put a bullet in my head, point blank? A shiver racks my body and goose bumps pebble along my arms. I’m in deep fucking shit.

  “What’s up, brother?” I hear Champ say from behind me.

  I jump. FUCK! Bastard. “You scared the living fuck out of me, man.”

  I clutch a hand to my chest, feeling my heart beating a million miles an hour.

  Champ chuckles before taking an unwanted seat next to me on the grass. “Sorry, dude. Wasn’t my intention. It’s not like I’m the most quietest walker in the world. Lost in your own head or something?”

  “Or something,” I murmur, watching the fish flap about in the water.

  He shakes his head at me, a slight smirk on his face. “I’m worried about Lauren.”

  My eyes snap to him, wide with his confession. Champ isn’t the kind of dude to profess his feelings. To anyone. “Me too, man.”

  “I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. Man, I fucking love that girl, and I never got a chance to tell her,” he tells me in a solemn manner.


  “How do you think Alexis feels, huh? That’s her best friend!” I look at him incredulously. Always thinking of fucking number one, and this time it just pisses me off.

  He holds his hands up in surrender. “Whoa, man, chill the fuck out.”

  I just stare at him, shaking my head in disappointment. I thought he would at least think about Alexis in all of this. They’re new in the lifestyle, and Alexis is confused as to what the hell is happening. Yet, all he can think about is his dick and the threat of suffering blue balls.

  “I’m sorry, VP. I didn’t think before I spoke. I just needed to let it out.” He hangs his head. Shame? Maybe.

  “I understand, but Alexis is this close to a breakdown right now.” I put a space between by thumb and forefinger to show him how close she really is. “And all you can think about is your dick.”

  “Low blow, man. I’m not thinking with my dick. I love the damn girl and am worried shitless.” His face contorts in anger at my insinuation. “She’s the first girl that has had my stomach in fucking knots.”

  I just sit there and stare at him in utter shock. I’ve never seen Champ with a woman unless he’s fucking them.

  Player through and through, he’s never once mentioned that he had a relationship in the past. Never once mentioned that he’s ever experienced love.

  “You and Lauren are serious then?” I ask, throwing a small stone across the pond.

  “I think so. I don’t know how she feels about us, all I know is that I fucking love her. I need her back in one piece.”

  I just nod my head, unable to think of anything to reply with. We sit in amicable silence for what feels like hours, when in reality it was only about twenty minutes. My drink is long gone, and my legs are starting to cramp painfully.

  Standing up, I reach a hand down to help Champ up before walking together back inside the clubhouse.

  Chapter 21

  Lauren

  My body screams at me in pain, pain I’ve never once experience. My head is swimming with having been beaten with some mundane object. My stomach curdles with the agony my body is suffering with.

 

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