Rewriting History

by Missy Johnson

  I reach for the phone and ask the administration to call Jamie to my office immediately. Jill looks at me like I’ve gone insane.

  “Trust me, everything will be fine,” I say to her, sitting up straighter in my chair. I begin to sweat. I wish I felt half as relaxed as I’m letting on. We sit in silence, neither of us wanting to risk being overheard, until there is a loud knock at the door.

  I walk over and open it. Jamie struts past me with a smirk on his face.

  “Well, well, what have we got here?” He grins, looking from Jill to me. “Trying to get a quickie in during lunch? Not very professional, Mr. Anderson. What would the school say if they knew you were pounding a student?” His eyes widen. “What would Daddy say?”

  I glance at Jill. Her face is void of emotion, apart from the twitch in her jaw that gives away her annoyance.

  I motion for Jamie to sit down. “What’s it going to take to keep you quiet, Jamie?” I ask, my voice calm.

  “You think I want something?” He shakes his head and nods at Jill. “The only thing I want to do is ruin her, like her mother has done to me.”

  What the hell does her mother have to do with anything?

  “All this time I thought you must have known about them,” he continues. “It didn’t occur to me that you were hiding something even bigger.” He shakes his head. “I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. You’re just like your mother—a fucking home-wrecking whore who’ll open her legs for anyone.”

  “What are you talking about?” she responds, confused. She glances at me and shakes her head, like she has no idea what all of this is about.

  “Oh, so you didn’t know?” He smiles widely. “Well, let me fill you in: your mother has been sleeping her way around the hospital.” He stands up and walks over to the window, turning around to face me. “She’s fucking my dad, and apparently Daddy has fallen in love.”

  What?

  Tears begin to sting her eyes, as she tries to hide her emotions. Anger grips me. I hate seeing him fuck with her like this. I lunge for him, but Jill stops me.

  “Don’t, Eli,” she whispers. “It’s not worth it.”

  “Get the fuck out of my office, Jamie. And if you so much as see Jill walking toward you, you walk the other fucking way,” I growl.

  “Or what?” Jamie challenges. “You forget that I hold all the cards here. How ’bout I tell you what I want and you stop threatening me?” He sticks his chest out, narrowing his eyes at me.

  “Fine,” I say, gritting my teeth. “Tell me what the fuck you want and then get the fuck out of my office.”

  “You’ve got a lot of attitude for someone who has his balls firmly in my hands, sir.” His eyes narrow as he wets his lips. “Tell you what: you give me an A in history, and provide me answers of the final exam, and your dirty little secret will remain just that.”

  That’s it? I almost laugh, because I was expecting so much worse. This kid really is an idiot. He has no idea I would’ve agreed to just about anything.

  “Fine,” I say through clenched teeth. “Not a fucking word, okay? Now get out.”

  “But I just got here,” he protests, laughing. “It’s so much fun catching up with you guys.”

  I glower at him and he holds his hands up.

  “Okay, I’m leaving.”

  As soon as he’s gone, I race over to the door and clip the lock, and then fall to my knees in front of Jill. Jamie is the last thing on my mind because I know this news about her mother will be driving her crazy.

  “Are you okay?” I whisper, stroking her hair.

  She looks up, her eyes meeting mine, full of hurt and confusion. “It can’t be true.”

  “It probably isn’t, baby. Jamie is not exactly the most reliable source of information,” I say, trying to make her feel better.

  “I know, but why make that up?” She has me there. I have no answer to that. “If you want me to back off for a while, until this thing with Jamie blows over, I will.”

  “No,” I say, kissing her forehead. There’s no way in hell I’m deserting her now. “Things can’t get much worse, right?” I add with a grin.

  She manages a smile as she gets to her feet. “I have to go. I need to speak to Mom.”

  “Okay, but Jill? Whatever she’s done, just remember she loves you. It’s okay to be angry at her, but don’t let it consume you.”

  “You’re telling me to forgive her,” she says, offering me a small smile. “Like you’ve done with your dad?”

  I have no comeback for that.

  Time alone does funny things to someone. It gives our minds a chance to really take in events and think about what’s going on around us. To say I’m really fucking nervous is an understatement. Jill’s mom is suspicious, Jamie knows, and Dad’s not stupid enough to realize I wouldn’t have stopped seeing Jill. The secrets, the lies—they’re all getting too much. I feel like I’m losing control and it scares me.

  But, it will all work out in the end, right?

  It has to.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Jill

  Barreling into the house, I let the front door slam into the wall with a bang.

  “Mom, wake up,” I yell from the bottom of the stairs. I need to hear it from her. I need to see the words come from her lips.

  It takes a few minutes, but she rushes out of her room. She stands at the top of the stairs, her face creased with worry.

  “Are you cheating on Dad?” I ask, my voice cold.

  Her eyes widen in shock as she lifts her hand to her mouth. The color drains from her cheeks as she struggles to form words. Guilty. It’s written all over her face.

  Fucking guilty.

  “How the fuck could you do that to Dad?” I scream. “He works away to support us, and you repay him by screwing other people? I don’t even know who you are anymore.”

  “Jilly, baby, I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Mom says, her face wet with tears. “Please, let me explain . . .”

  “How long?” I ask.

  She raises her head, her eyes meeting mine. “A few months.”

  “Since we moved here?” I gasp.

  This is bullshit. I can’t handle being around her right now. I grab my bag and walk to the door, not bothering to address her. I think we both know where I’m headed. My feet hit the pavement, and I run. I don’t bother looking back. Running will help me calm down and make sense of what is happening. I run for an hour, until I’ve reached Eli’s place.

  I don’t know where else to go.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Eli

  “Jill?” I ask, opening the door. I quickly glance down the road and usher her inside. She’s a mess. I can tell she’s been crying from the way her eyes are so red and puffy. I reach out, touching her clammy arms. “God, did you run here? Why didn’t you call me?”

  She doesn’t answer, but lets me lead her inside. I lift her into my arms and carry her to the bathroom. She’s shaking, and I need to get her warmed up.

  I turn on the shower and slowly undress her. She’s lost in her own world, not taking in anything I say. If I didn’t know better I’d wonder if she’d taken something. I shiver, memories of the night of the party running through my head.

  God, I hate seeing her hurting.

  With the water nice and hot, I help her into the shower, not caring that my own clothes are getting soaked. Fresh tears make their way down her cheeks and I wish so hard that she would talk to me, but I know I can’t push her. The most important thing right now is getting her warm and dry.

  I wrap her in a towel and lead her into the bedroom, sitting her on the edge of my bed. I shuffle through my drawers until I find an old college sweatshirt and a pair of track pants. She’s more with it now, and is able to change herself into the clothes.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know where else to go . . .”

  “Is it your mom?” I ask gently, crouching down beside her.

  She nods, and I lift my hand to her face and wipe her eyes.

 
; “What happened? Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Not really. I want to forget about it.” She laughs bitterly.

  “Then that’s what we’ll do.”

  She takes my hand and we go out into the living room.

  “Sit down,” I order, leaving her there to go back into the kitchen. I grab us some drinks and some food to snack on and carry it back out to her.

  She’s curled up on the sofa, smiling at me as I set the food out.

  “Thanks.” She leans over and kisses me. Leaning back on the sofa, I motion for her to come closer. She does, snuggling into my arms.

  We spend the rest of the afternoon watching movies while lying on the sofa, her in my arms.

  “You spoke to your mom, I take it?” I ask, tilting her chin upward.

  She nods, her gaze falling on mine. “We argued,” she says quietly. “I just can’t believe she’d do this. I can’t even imagine how my dad is going to feel when he finds out. I mean, he’s fucking fighting a war, and she’s in the arms of another guy?” She shakes her head vigorously, anger lacing her words.

  I stroke her hair and listen. I know how she feels. The anger I’ve felt for my father has spanned more than a decade. I want to tell her it gets easier, and that she should forgive her mom, but who am I to say that?

  Why should she believe me when I can’t forgive my own father?

  “I’m so sorry,” I mutter, pressing my lips against her forehead. “I wish there was something I could say . . .”

  She shakes her head. “No, I’m sorry. I pushed you to forgive your dad, but the betrayal you must have felt from him . . . I’m sorry.”

  “My problem with Dad is more than just the fact that he cheated on Mom,” I say quietly. “He wasn’t a good father. Not to me. He was an even worse husband for my mother.”

  I take a deep breath, knowing it’s time she hears the whole story.

  “When I was ten, he cheated on my mom. With one of his students.”

  “Oh, Eli,” she whispers.

  “That’s why I struggle with us sometimes. He hurt my mother so much with someone who was barely older than me . . . I don’t want to be like him, Jill.” I curse and sit forward, my hands clasped in front of me. “I never want to hurt anyone the way he hurt us. I worry about how this will end.” I look at her, my heart racing. “I’d hate myself if I hurt you, but I don’t see how this can go any other way.”

  “The only way you can hurt me is by not letting me in,” she replies.

  Her arm caresses my back, and I’m amazed at how much I feel from even the smallest touch.

  “My mom . . . I’m sure we’ll be okay. This whole thing is a shock and it will take me a while to get used to . . . but they’ve been good parents to me. She’s been a great mother.”

  She reaches for my hand and squeezes it. “You spend so much time worrying about being like your Dad, Eli. How much energy and time goes into that? Think about forgiving him, for your own sake, not his. For your mom’s sake, because you can never be happy carrying around all this hurt.”

  I’m stunned by her words. She constantly amazes me. At barely eighteen years old, she speaks with more wisdom and truth than I ever have in my entire life. How can she think with such clarity after what she’s just been through?

  I pull her into my arms, kissing her over and over again. I know I don’t need to worry about her, and I find that funny. All along, it was never her that was at risk of falling apart. It was me.

  ***

  I didn’t sleep much last night.

  Most of the time I spent lying there, listening to the sound of Jill breathe, memorizing the feel of her skin against of mine. I love watching her while she sleeps. And touching her body . . . God, it drives me crazy. I reach out and run my finger down the center of her back. My cock is aching at how incredibly sexy she is.

  She stirs and rolls toward me. My fingers find her breasts, and I roll her nipples between my fingers.

  “Nice way to wake up.” She giggles, grinding her body against mine. “Have you been awake long?”

  “Long enough to know you sleep-talk.” I chuckle.

  “I do not.” She gasps, slapping my arm. Her eyes widen. “What did I say?”

  I laugh, massaging her breasts with the palms of my hands. I roll her on top of me, positioning her legs on either side of mine.

  “Hmm, probably safest if I don’t repeat it, you naughty girl.” I narrow my eyes at her as my fingers trail down her stomach.

  She grins and bites her lip as my erection is rubbing along the softness of her ass.

  Her hand finding my cock, she tugs a few times. Her touch is so light and it feels identical to when silk sheets rub along your skin. Leaning over, I grab a condom off the bedside table. Sheathed, she directs me to her entrance and I slowly drive into her drenched core. She’s so tight and I know I’m not going to last long—especially when she pulls her knees to her chest, pulling me deeper inside her.

  Her fingers massage my balls and without warning, she comes, her walls contracting as she milks my cock. Through her orgasm, her fingers never leave my balls. She gently squeezes as her body tenses: a move that drives me insane.

  I lean forward and kiss her neck as the tightness in my cock explodes. I release, my hands gripping her hips as my back arches before I collapse beside her on the bed.

  She nuzzles in my arms, our bodies drenched in sweat as we both breathe heavily. Kissing her neck, I whisper in her ear how much she means to me. She smiles and turns her head, her soft lips meeting mine.

  We fall asleep in that position. Sometime during the night she pulls the covers up over us and plants soft kisses on my cheek. I rouse, but quickly fall back to sleep.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Jill

  I sit in his living room, alone with my thoughts. I couldn’t handle school today, but Eli has still gone to work so things don’t look suspicious. He told me I’m welcome to stay here, but followed that up with I should go home and talk to my mom.

  Mom called my phone incessantly the first day, and after that I turned it off. I told Eli I texted her, but I haven’t. She doesn’t deserve my pity, or get to know where I am. I’m eighteen—an adult. I don’t owe her anything. She should have stopped this before anything happened.

  But I need to go home because I haven’t worn anything but Eli’s clothes. Not that I’m complaining. I love the smell of his musky-scented sweatshirt and track pants that hang off my slender frame. Turning my phone on, I see that I have twenty-four missed calls from Mom, five from Alice, and one from Sophia. My phone beeps with several messages and I wait as they all roll through.

  Alice: Where are you?

  Alice: Your mom keeps phoning me, asking for Eli’s number. Answer your phone.

  Alice: For fuck’s sake, Jill . . . call me, I’m worried.

  It didn’t occur to me that Mom would call Alice. I instantly feel bad. Shit, I’m the world’s worst friend.

  Me: So sorry, hon, I’m okay. I’ve been staying with Eli. Found out some news and I needed to get away. I’ll call you soon xox.

  I force myself to go back home and face Mom. No matter how angry I am, I know she deserves to know that I’m okay. The moment I open the front door, I can hear her crying on the phone.

  “I don’t know where she is, Phil. She hasn’t been home for three days.” She hiccups.

  As I walk into the kitchen where Mom’s sitting at the table, her phone to her ear, she looks up at me, her face flooding with relief.

  “God, she’s home,” she sobs. Dropping the phone, she runs over to me and hugs me.

  I stand there and make no attempt to hug her back. Why should I? She’s betrayed everything I believe in.

  “Oh Jilly, please don’t ever do that to me again. Where the hell have you been?” she cries.

  I don’t answer. Instead I take a step back and look at her. She looks tired, like she hasn’t slept in days. Her clothes are worn and she’s not wearing makeup—which is rare for her
. It’s hurting me seeing my mom like this, but she’s brought it all on herself. Is this how Eli felt about his father?

  “I need to know why.” I shake my head because I don’t understand.

  This is my father we’re talking about: the most devoted and loving person I know. Everything he does is for us. This is going to break him. I sit down opposite Mom and wait for her to speak.

  “Sweetie, I want you to know that I never meant to hurt anybody,” she whispers, studying her half-empty cup of tea.

  My body stills as my anger begins to boil. Calm down. You promised Eli you would listen to her.

  “I was needing some emotional support with your dad being away for so long. You need to understand, Jill, it’s hard for me to be here alone and your dad overseas most of the year,” she says softly, studying my face before continuing.

  “Steve is Jamie’s dad. He’s a surgeon at the hospital, and we sort of clicked. It started with coffee and someone to talk to, and over the months our attraction for each other—”

  “Have you told Dad?” I interrupt.

  “Yes, I have told your father. He’s on his way home now.”

  I wish it were under better circumstances that Dad was coming home, but I’m so glad I get to see him after so many months away.

  “Mom, I’m struggling to understand at the moment. I love you, but I need some space. I need to get my head straight or I’ll end up saying something I regret.”

  “I understand,” she replies, wiping her eyes.

  I stand up and push my chair in.

  As I’m walking up the stairs to my room, she calls out to me. “I love you.”

  I pause for a second, but I don’t respond.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Eli

  “Eli.”

  I sigh, wishing I’d checked who the call was from. I’d been sure it would be Jill.

  “For God’s sake, Jules. I told you. I’ll see him when I can.”

  “No, it’s Dad. He’s in a coma at the hospital.”