by Kimber White
Jarred gestured behind him, commanding the pack to stay still, but close. Pairs and pairs of wolf eyes glowered, dropping their heads low in deference to their Alpha, but standing ready to strike.
“Lucia,” Jarred said, his voice dropped so low and flat I barely recognized it. “Go home.”
I reared back as if his words came as an actual slap in the face. “I will not. You're ridiculous.”
This earned me a sharp glance from Camilla. So be it. I was a grown woman. The choices I made were my own.
“Get the hell out of Wild Lake, tiger,” Jarred said, deciding to ignore me. Clint stood behind me. His protective fury came off of him in waves. Instinct drew me to him. I wanted to claim him with my body language and take his hand. Reason won out. Jarred may have bottled his wolf, but I knew how close he was to losing it. As angry as I was with him, if I didn’t keep this bomb diffused, someone would get hurt.
“Clint is here because of me,” I said. “At my invitation. You don’t speak for all of Wild Lake, brother.
Jarred became even more unglued. He started to pace. When Camilla put a hand out, trying to draw him back, he nipped the air. She clamped her jaw hard, delivering a withering, marital stare, but she stayed silent.
“Lucia. Of all the things you’ve pulled...after everything that’s happened. Have you lost your damn mind?”
“And you won’t speak to her like that again!” Clint’s voice roared across the lake. He made a move to put me behind him, but I stood my ground. We’d reached a razor-thin truce. Any perceived threat would send things into chaos once more.
“Lucia, he’s a tiger. A tiger!”
“I’m aware of that,” I said, somehow finding the inner zen to keep my tone even. “And what I do with my life and my time is my business.”
“The hell it is!” Jarred yelled, tearing at his hair. I put a hand on Clint’s chest as he roared again. I wanted to ask him to go back to the cabin and wait for me. One sharp look from him and I knew it would be futile.
“Jarred, I think you’re the one who needs to go home. I’ll meet you there in an hour. We’ll talk.”
Camilla took my lead. She went to Jarred’s side and slid her arm around his waist. “She’s right. There’s a solution to all of this. But not while you’re both running this hot.”
“I am not leaving you alone with this...this...tiger for another second.” He said the word tiger with such revulsion, it burned through me. I gathered the strength to call him on it. Jarred was a lot of things. Bigoted wasn’t one of them. Even Camilla blanched at his tone.
Clint reacted, straining against me, he let his tiger stripes shimmer to the surface. Camilla’s jaw dropped at the sight of them. Her diplomacy gave way to sheer wonder. I had to suppress a smile. Clint really was something to behold.
“Enough,” I said. “From both of you. Clint? Please, please go back to the cabin. Wait for me there. Jarred, if you take the pack and go back home, I’ll go with you.”
“No!” Now it was Clint who couldn’t keep his wild nature under wraps. I’d had about all I could take of Alpha testosterone. At the same time, Clint’s nature stirred mine. My legs trembled as desire poured through me. I only hoped my brother was too preoccupied to pick up on it. He’d seen quite enough for one day.
Jarred’s command exploded in my head. I staggered sideways at the force of it. The urge to drop to my knees and submit to him took my breath from me. Clint sensed it. He got in front of me and stared Jarred down. The pack closed in.
I pushed back against my brother with the same power he’d tried to use on me. He had a similar physical reaction. He doubled over, clutching his chest. Camilla stood straight and stoic at his side. She alone understood what was happening.
Grief tore through me. I didn’t want to do it like this. Not by force. Not in anger. But Jarred was leaving me no choice.
“Lucia,” he whispered. “My God. Loosh.”
Tears sprang to my eyes. He reached for me again, gentler this time. I held my ground. There was no other way to do it. Jarred wasn’t my Alpha. He never really had been. Still, it ripped my heart in two to push him away. I felt him test the corners of my mind again. I held firm. Jarred took it as a physical blow. He held his head in his hands. His color drained and a capillary burst in his right eye.
“I’m sorry,” I said, choking on my own words. I severed the final strands of my brother’s hold as a sob tore from me.
Clint didn’t understand what was happening. He only sensed my pain. He wrapped an arm around me. Jarred growled.
“Clint,” I said, crying. “You have to trust me.”
Jarred recovered quickly. I could no longer sense his commands. I didn’t need to. The pack closed ranks beside him, advancing on Clint. I knew my brother. Later, he would tell me I’d left him no choice.
But, no one would die today. Not because of me. I turned to Clint. Bringing my hand up, I touched his cheek.
“Go,” I whispered. If I had to break my own heart, I would do it to save my brother and my mate from each other.
“Lucia?” Clint’s eyes filled with shock. I only hoped by the light of the next sunrise, he’d understand what really happened here today.
“Go,” I said again. “I can’t hold them back forever, and I will not choose between you.”
Clint set his jaw. His eyes glinted. As Jarred snarled and started to charge him, Clint took a step back and dropped my hand.
He shifted into his tiger, earning a gasp from Camilla and tears from me. Clint’s tiger turned, swishing his mighty tail. Then, he took one great leap and disappeared into the woods.
Fifteen
For three days, Jarred wouldn’t speak to me. I’d shut him out of my mind. He seemed hellbent on shutting me out of his life. Just a few weeks ago, I’d wished for that very thing. Now that it happened, it felt like my guts, my heart, had been scooped out, leaving nothing but pain in the empty space.
Camilla did what she always did. Ever the diplomat, she tried to nurture and console me. She brought me food, checked in on me. I stayed in the cabin, unwilling to go back to Jarred’s house. For once, he didn’t argue with me.
Then, there was Clint. His absence had left me physically ill. Every bone in my body ached; my lungs burned. The need we’d quenched only rose again tenfold.
“You two are going to have to find a way to be in the same room together,” Camilla said. She leaned against the far wall of the cabin while I curled up on the pallet. The pain seemed more bearable if I didn’t try to move.
“He doesn’t understand,” I said. “I don’t know how to make him.”
Camilla came to me, kneeling in front of the pallet. She smoothed the hair away from my face where it had pasted there from sweat. The moment Camilla’s fingers touched my skin, her eyes widened with alarm.
“Why didn’t you say something?” she asked. She went quickly to the kitchen and ran a cloth under cold water. I sucked in a hard breath as she pressed the cool cloth to my forehead. Even that slight touch sent pain shooting through every nerve.
“He won’t listen. You were there when I tried.”
Camilla leaned back and sat on the hearth. “All I heard was anger and posturing. And the both of you going immediately to opposite corners like you always do. You’re so damn stubborn.”
The effort of moving made my stomach roll, but I sat up anyway. “He’s the one who’s stubborn. I’ve been telling him...I’ve been telling all of you for years I’m not wired like you are. Now, I know why. Clint’s my mate. I didn’t plan it. Neither did he. I’m sorry it makes trouble for the packs. It wasn’t something I could help.”
Camilla shot me a sideways smile. “Well, you’re half right. There’s no question that tiger’s your mate. But, you could have handled this so much better, Lucia. You should have gone to Jarred with it right away. Hiding a tiger on Pat’s farm wasn’t the way to go.”
“Camilla, you know I love you. You’re the closest thing to a sister I’ve ever had. You of all
people know what would have happened if I went to Jarred the second I met Clint. Things would have turned out exactly the way they did. Jarred would have lost his temper and set the pack on Clint. We’d be in the same situation as we are now.”
She laughed. It wasn’t a mean laugh, but it roiled me just the same. “Did you want Jarred to find you like that?”
“What do you mean?”
Anger flashed in Camilla’s eyes. It startled me because I wasn’t used to seeing it. Oh, she could be fierce when she needed to. I’d just never seen that anger directed at me.
“He’s your brother, Lucia. Never mind all the rest of it. You can’t blame him for losing it when he was forced to witness his sister...er...mating right in front of him.”
I threw off the blanket and whipped it against the wall. “You think I planned that?”
“Did you?”
She had me speechless. I stormed toward the door and smashed it open. I wanted to shift. I wanted to tear up ground. Anything to push back the agony I felt.
Camilla followed but took a position in the doorway, crossing her arms as she watched me rail and pace. I whirled around and faced her.
“No!” I said. “I didn’t plan that.”
Camilla shrugged. “Well, then you have to at least admit it was pretty careless. You were out in the open on pack lands. You knew Jarred was worried about you and bound to come looking. What choice did you give him? You refused to answer any of his calls. And you knew Peter has his pack trying to keep an eye on you too.”
“I didn’t ask for any of it! Peter can go to hell.”
“That’s easy for you to say, but there’s still the little matter of his challenge. Your brother is willing to fight to the death to protect you. You of all people should know how great a price that is.”
My heart dropped to my feet. She was so calm. Only a slight coloring of her cheeks betrayed the anger she had to feel. Her husband. Her mate. The father of her son. My brother. She was right. I hadn’t thought about the price he was willing to pay for me.
“I’m sorry,” I said, and I meant it. I was sorry for all of it except for one thing. I would never be sorry for the way I felt about Clint. But, I’d driven him away too. In the days since that standoff by the lake, I couldn’t sense him. Had he left me for good? Even the fleeting thought that I might never see him again hit me like an anvil to the chest.
I leaned against an elm tree; it cast a long shadow over the cabin. Camilla’s eyes glowed silver as her emotions churned.
“What can I do?” I asked, throwing my hands up. “I’ve made a mess of things, haven’t I?”
Finally, the smile came back to her face. “Well, that’s usually how it goes with fated mates. It’s never convenient.”
“It was for you,” I said.
“It was. But I didn’t plan for that either. When I left Washington State, I thought I would die. I had to leave behind everyone I knew and loved and I had no idea what I’d be walking into. I didn’t trust it, at first. Then, I met Jarred.”
She blushed again. This time, instead of anger, I knew it was the intimate memory of the first time she let my brother touch her. I cast my eyes down, feeling like an intruder. At the same time, the hole in my heart grew as I realized what Jarred must have felt like the other day when he found Clint and me together.
I looked back up at Camilla and squared my shoulders. “I’ll try,” I said. “Will you get him to at least sit down and listen to me?”
Her face brightened and she came to me, arms wide. “Yes. I can get him to do that much. But you have to find a way to put your anger aside when you talk to him. Never forget that Jarred is coming from a place of love for you. It gets mucked up, I know that. He’s worried about you. He’s a man and an Alpha on top of it. It’s hard for someone like that to see past his protective instincts and understand how his actions affect you. So, you have to make him see.”
I hugged her. It felt so good. Shutting out my brother had been one of the hardest things I’d ever done. I only hoped he could understand why.
Sixteen
We went to Wild Lake Outfitters. Late Sunday, and the store was closed. Jarred worked late going over the books with Andre Lanier. I’d hoped to find him alone, but this was as close to neutral ground as I was likely to get. Plus, he wasn’t expecting me. Camilla thought it best to give him as little time as possible to work up his temper again. She swore his first reaction would be relief and joy at seeing me. It turns out she’d kept a secret of her own from him. Jarred had no idea I’d been staying at the cabin.
My heart jackhammered as I walked up the stairs to my brother’s office. With the renovations up there complete, his desk faced huge windows overlooking the main floor. Andre was with him, and I nearly lost my nerve. When Andre turned and spotted me, I could feel a wave of lust pouring off of him. Before Clint, it had always sparked an echo of desire in me. Now, a wall slammed around my heart.
But, Andre was nothing like Peter Matthews. He stood like a gentleman as Camilla opened the office door, ushering me in. Andre cleared his throat and plastered on a smile. For his part, Jarred looked at me with those ice-blue eyes of his, casually scratching his chin. He leaned back in his chair and made a quick gesture, flicking his fingers to send Andre out of the room.
I expected Jarred to throw papers off his desk, punch a wall, something. Instead, he showed no outward sign of emotion. Oh, I knew this Jarred McGraw. It was the side he showed to the other packs and foes he faced in business. Stone cold. Cunning. Lethal. Before Camilla came along, he’d driven the women of Wild Lake into a frenzy as they tried to get close to him.
“What’s happened?” Camilla asked. Only her voice and her gentle touch on his arm made my brother drop his mask a little. His eyes flashed with warmth and he reached up to slide an arm around her waist, pulling her close to him.
“Word’s gotten out,” he said, locking his eyes on me. “It seems your tiger didn’t turn tail and run away quietly.”
His words delivered a gut punch that sent heat shooting through me. My tiger.
“Where is he?” I asked, my voice cracking. I’d promised Camilla I would stay calm and push my emotions aside. One mention of Clint and all my promises went out the window. “What have you done to him?” I slammed my palms on the desk and got in Jarred’s face.
Camilla must have given Jarred the exact same speech. She slid her arm around his shoulder. Only the slightest darkening of his eyes indicated his own struggle to stay calm.
“Nothing,” he said. “But he’s been through Peter Matthews’s pack lands.”
The air went out of me. My knees went weak. All my anger turned to terror as I sank down into the chair opposite Jarred’s.
“Don’t worry,” Jarred said, his tone cold. “As far as I know, he left under his own steam. But Peter’s not stupid. He could scent you all over him.”
“Clint confronted Peter...he got that close?” More than anything, I just wanted to find Clint myself. I knew Wild Lake was the most dangerous place on earth for him right now. Venezuela was nothing. And he’d walked straight onto Peter’s land?
“Peter wouldn’t say. He just made it clear he knew about the two of you. He thinks it was my doing. A way to undercut his challenge for you.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Camilla said. “Has he lost his grip on reality that much to think you’d willingly hand your sister over to a tiger just to muck things up for him?”
“He’s not what you think he is,” I said. “You all say the word tiger like it’s slur.”
“He’s not our kind,” Jarred said. “Do you even know the first thing about tiger shifters?”
“I know what I need to know. I know that he’s...mine.”
Jarred blanched. He knew we were coming to this. Still, my declaration hurt him. I hated that it had to. But, I could no more deny Clint than he could Camilla. I bit my lip, fighting the urge to say exactly that. I knew my brother. Invoking Camilla would pierce straight through his stoic ven
eer.
“Well, then let me enlighten you,” he said. “They’re not like us, Lucia. He has no people. No pride. No pack. You said yourself this guy is on the run. He’s shiftless. Rootless. The second things got dicey around here, he took off. That’s not how true mates react. If this was for real...if it had been me in his place and Camilla’s pack tried to run me off, you think it would have mattered? No power on this earth would have torn me from her side. That’s what being fated mates means.”
My wolf bubbled up. I gripped the arms of my chair to keep from shifting. Slowly, I rose. I shot a look to Camilla, warning her not to say a word.
“And Camilla would have done the exact same thing I did, Jarred. She would have made you get the hell out of there instead of watching her family dismember the man she loved. That’s what being true mates means!”
Jarred reared back. His face went white and he turned to Camilla. A tiny smile played at the corners of her mouth. Jarred questioned her with his eyes. She bit her lip and shrugged. It was all the confirmation Jarred needed.
His cool facade slipped. His eyes went silver and he slammed a fist on the desk. “Impossible. I’m surrounded by impossible women.” He rose from his chair put one hand to his waist and kept the other over his mouth. Ready to launch into another tirade, it was my turn to go cold. Before Jarred got the chance, Camilla took a step backward. Her mouth dropped in surprise and she put a hand on Jarred’s arm, maybe to steady him.
The hairs stood up on the back of my neck and that now familiar heat burned through me. It couldn’t be. He wouldn’t…
“Jarred,” Camilla said. She kept a vice grip on his arm, making it impossible for him to shift without risking hurting her. “I think you’ll get the chance to ask him yourself.”
I turned slowly, willing my lungs to work. Clint walked slowly up the stairs then stopped at the window. His eyes glowed green as he caught mine. Jarred growled behind me as Clint reached for the door.
Seventeen
