I shake my head as I finish warming up, trying to forget my screwed up life. Music and sex are the only two things I’ve found that help me do that.
My fingers glide over the strings and I hit a sour note.
Trip slaps me on the back. “What’s with you man? Couldn’t get it up last night?”
“Fuck you, dude,” I snap.
He holds his hands up in surrender. “Easy, I was joking. Chill the fuck out.”
The tension leaves my shoulders. Trip’s been my best friend a long time, and I know he didn’t mean anything by it. “Sorry, bro. I’m a little edgy.”
Trip rolls his eyes. “Not this Sophie shit again? I thought that hot, little redheaded friend of Lanie’s was pulling you out of that slump.”
“This has nothing to do with Sophie. Noel can have her sorry ass. I hope those two assholes are happy together. I hate that he’s stringing Lanie along like this. She seems like a nice girl.”
Trip raises his eyebrow so high it touches the bandanna he has tied around his head. “Are you catching feelings for the redhead?”
“What!? No. You know me better than that.” Damn it. How the fuck would he figure that shit out? Am I catching feelings? Is that why I feel so crazy?
“If you say so, brother. What am I supposed to think? You never spend an entire night holed up in a hotel room with a chick. The way you were lookin’ at her on the bus the other day, it was like you’d been shot by that little fucker in diapers with wings and arrows like in the cartoons. And now you’re concerned about Lanie’s feelings?”
I laugh. “Did you really just talk about Cupid like he’s real?”
“Whatever. Make fun of me all you want. All I know is between you and Noel I don’t know which one of you is chasing the tail harder.”
I shake my head. “Aubrey’s here to have a good time for the weekend. No one’s catching feelings.”
Trip smirks. “Yeah. You keep telling yourself that.”
That smart-ass I-know-everything look he’s got on his face isn’t helping the situation. “A girl like her would never really be into a guy like me.”
“You’re never going to know until you try. It’s okay to have feelings for someone, Riff.”
“Not for me. She can do so much better than me. I know that. Why set myself up for a tragic ending.”
Trip frowns. “I know this is hard to hear, but not every situation is going to end up like—”
I jump up from the amp I’m sitting on. “Don’t even fucking say it.”
“All I’m sayin’ is—”
I set my guitar down and cut him off. “Quit trying to convince me I’m not poison. I’ll ruin her, like I do everything else.”
Trip opens his mouth to start on me again, but I stalk away before he has a chance. He’s been trying to save my worthless ass for years and I wish he would stop and let me be miserable like I deserve. He calls my name a couple times, but I don’t dare look back.
I make my way over to catering and grab a cold beer from the cooler. I twist off the lid and take a long pull. Trip has a way of getting under my skin like no one else.
Several of the opening acts and a slew of groupies sit around the room hanging out in small groups, chatting amongst themselves.
I rub my forehead and close my eyes. Sometimes I really hate the fact that it’s hard to get a moments peace on the road. There’s so much shit inside my head I need to work out in order to feel like I’m not losing my mind over a woman.
“What’s wrong? Blue balls killing you?” Donovan says next to me with a smart-ass snicker.
My eyes snap open and instantly narrow. “You got a fucking problem with me, asshole? Say the word. I beg you. Give me one reason to drop your ass right here, right now.”
Donovan shoves his blonde hair out of his eyes. “Easy, Romeo. I was merely asking for confirmation that you bagged that hot redhead last night since you cock-blocked me.”
I fold my arms over my chest. “I did. What of it?”
He shrugs and then casually reaches down and grabs a beer. “Just curious. I would’ve loved to tap that. It looked tight.”
Before I know what I’ve done, I draw back and blast him square in the face. Screams erupt all around me, but it feels like I’m moving in slow motion. Shock registers on Donovan’s face, and then it twists in anger. Before he gets a chance to land a punch on me, I hit him again with as much force as I can.
Blood pours from his nose and I pull back ready to strike again, but I’m suddenly being yanked away.
Trip hooks my arm and drags me back. “What the fuck are you doing?’
I can’t answer him, because honestly, I’m not sure what came over me. It’s not like it’s the first time he’s razzed me about a woman, but the mention of him wanting to fuck my girl made my brain short circuit.
I shake my head. My girl? What the fuck is wrong with me? She isn’t my girl. Why do these stupid, fucking thoughts keep rolling through me? This girl is driving me insane.
I take a deep breath. “I’m cool, man. You can let go.”
Trip stares at me, while he decides if he can let go or not. After a couple seconds he loosens his grip on my arm. “You going to tell me what that was about?”
I throw my hands on my waist and try to slow my breathing. “He’s just being his normal cocksucker self. What do you want me to say?”
He shakes his head. “I heard what he said. Why don’t you admit it to yourself? You like that girl.”
I open my mouth to protest his accusations, but Trip narrows his eyes. Fuck. I hate it when he tries to go Dr. Phil on my ass. “Even if I did, it can’t happen.”
“Why?”
“Because I can’t let it, that’s why!”
“Give people a little credit, Riff. You have to learn to let some in. You let me and Tyke in.”
“Yeah, I let Noel in, too. See how that turned out, right. You and Tyke are the exception. You guys were there before—” I quickly cut myself off. It’s too difficult to even bring up. I hate reliving the past and the fucked up shit I’ve done. It reminds me that I’m a dirt bag.
Trip sighs. “Noel is a fucker, I’ll give you that, but I still don’t believe he did it on purpose. He still swears he doesn’t remember.”
I rub the sides of my shaved head. “I’m so sick of Noel. I want all of that behind me.”
“Then that’s what you do.” I stare at him quizzically. “You move on. Let that hate and anger go and focus on something good for a change. Like the redhead. She seems very positive if you ask me.” I scowl and Trip laughs. “See! I knew it! You’re catching feelings. Admit it and go after her.”
That’s the problem when you’ve been friends with someone since grade school. They know you too damn well. “Okay. Fine. I’ll see where this thing goes.”
Trip grins. “I should’ve been a shrink instead of a drummer.”
I shove his shoulder. “That would’ve worked if you could read.”
He laughs and then gives me the finger. “I would’ve just banged a geek and got her to do all my work. I would’ve found a way through.”
I roll my eyes. “You are so messed up.”
AUBREY
Standing on the side of the stage and watching the guys perform to a sold out crowd is amazing. This truly is the best seat in the house. Riff’s guitar screams a sexy note as he wiggles his tongue at the crowd. My face heats as I allow my mind to drift back to all the amazing things he can do with that thing.
My cell buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out, hoping it’s Lanie explaining where the hell she is. She was supposed to meet me over here so I wouldn’t have to stand here alone like an idiot.
Lanie: Sorry. Went on to Mom’s I’ll be back before we head out to say goodbye. Didn’t figure you’d miss me since Riff seems like pretty good company. ;) A winky face, Lanie, really? I shake my head. She’s a goofball, but she knows me too well.
I was supposed to go visit my folks tonight, too. That was the purpose for meet
ing up here in our home state, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen. I promised Riff one more night.
As soon as the set is over, the guys all head my way. Trip and Tyke hig-five me before heading out of sight.
Sweat lines every inch of Riff’s skin as he approaches. He obviously gives everything he has in a show.
“You were amazing,” I tell him as soon as he’s close enough to hear.
“Thanks! It’s a rush being out there.”
I nod. “I can tell.”
Noel approaches us. “You seen Lane?”
I shake my head. “No, but she did text me, telling me she already left for her Mom’s house.”
Noel furrows his brow. “She didn’t wait on me? I was supposed to go with her.”
I shrug. “I’m not sure what she’s doing.”
He runs his hands through his sweaty hair. “Okay, guys, catch you all later. I’m going to try and find her.”
Riff watches his band mate retreat. “He’s lost his mind.”
“I think it’s kind of sweet he’s so into her.”
He turns his piercing eyes on me. “You wouldn’t think that if you knew the things I knew about him.”
“What do you mean?”
Riff shakes his head. “Forget it. I shouldn’t have said anything. Come on. I need a shower.”
He grabs my hand and tries to tug me along with him, but I plant my feet firmly. “You can’t say something like that and then blow it off. Lanie’s my best friend. If he’s going to hurt her, I want to know.”
He sighs. “What Noel does is his business. I’m not getting in the middle of it.”
“Are you saying you have secrets?”
Riff frowns and touches my cheek. “We all have secrets, Kitten. Even you. I’m not going to try to pretend that we know everything about each other, but it’s a fact of life. No one discloses every piece of information about themselves to someone else. It’s not human nature.”
He’s right. Everyone has something they don’t want others to know. Just like the information I know about this charity project. It kills me I can’t tell Lanie the truth and I’m thankful she hasn’t brought it up to me since I’ve been here. I don’t know if I could hide that from her once we’re face to face.
“Something wrong?” he asks.
I shake my head. “Just thinking about how you’re right.”
A sad smile plays on his lips. “Come on. Enough lingering on life lessons. Let’s go do something fun.”
I raise an eyebrow. “What do you have in mind?”
Riff gives me that wicked grin he’s famous for. “Something that ends with me inside you.”
Oh dear God. Every hormone in my body nearly convulses at his words. That man knows exactly what to say to nearly cause me to lose my mind.
Chapter 10
RIFF
Cruising around the dark streets of Dallas on my bike with Aubrey wrapped around me feels like freedom. I love my job. The money’s great and so are the chicks, but I never really feel at peace.
While I would love to spend another night locked away in my hotel room with her, I figure a little excitement is in order. I told Trip I’m going to see where this goes, so to show her that maybe I can be more than just sex to her, I’m taking her out.
We pass by a small bar with a neon light shining from the window. Perfect. We can grab a beer and chat and won’t have to worry about fans or that fucker Donovan starting shit. I want some one-on-one time to see where this girl’s head is.
I back my bike against the curb and throw down the kickstand. Aubrey hops off and yanks the helmet from her head while I readjust my backwards baseball cap.
I catch myself almost mesmerized by her as she runs her fingers through her hair. I don’t remember feeling this way after I bagged a girl before. Ever. Usually, after the initial humping, they lose their allure. Not Aubrey. All I can think about when I look at her are ways to keep her around longer.
She throws her hands on her hips. “What exactly are we doing here?”
I stand and store the helmet. “I figured we could get a beer and get to know each other a little better.”
The corners of her mouth turn up. “I thought that’s what we did last night.”
I shake my head and pull her against me. “Last night we fucked, and I still haven’t gotten you out of my system, so I’m left with one alternative.”
A blush washes over her cheeks. “What’s that?”
I shrug. “To see if this thing between us can ever go anywhere.”
“Riff...”
If she’s about to give me the reasons why this can never work between us, I don’t want to hear them. “Before you say anything, give me the weekend. We only have tonight and tomorrow, and if you end up hating my guts by the time you leave, then you never have to see me again.”
Kitten pulls her lips into a tight line. “Okay, then.”
“Yeah?” I hug her to me. “One more thing.”
“What’s that?”
“In public, around the band and the fans, I don’t mind you calling me Riff, but everywhere else I want you to call me Zach.” It’s a weird request. The name she calls me shouldn’t matter, but it does. If I’m going to step out of my comfort zone and see if this can go somewhere, than I want it to be as real as possible. I don’t want her to like me for Riff, my stage persona and all that it entails. I want her to like me for Zach—the fucked up guy with loads of problems.
She’ll probably be running for the hills this time tomorrow.
I lead her into the small bar. Her tiny hand fits perfectly in mine as I hold it causally at my side. The bar is dark, with only the light over the bar providing light around the room. A few older men sit with their shoulders slumped at the bar talking to the bartender. This is exactly the atmosphere I’m hoping for. Nice and secluded.
A fairly modern juke box plays an old-school country song as we make our way over to the bar.
The thirty-something bartender raises an eyebrow and shoves her brown hair over her shoulder. “IDs?”
It’s been a long time since I’d been carded to drink. It’s nice to know she’s completely oblivious as to who I am.
After she’s double-checked them, she asks, “What can I get you?”
I turn to Aubrey. “Ladies choice?”
She smiles. “Two Budweisers, please.”
The bartender nods and meanders off to get our drinks. I lean against the bar as I wait with Aubrey. She’s looking exceptionally beautiful tonight. Her long, red hair falls around her shoulders in loose waves and the green halter-top she’s wearing accentuates her fantastic rack.
She grins at me when she catches me staring at her tits. “You see something you like?”
I laugh. “I’m trying to determine if it’s your ass or your tits I like best. I’m usually a breast man, but your ass in those jeans...I literally want to bite it.”
She giggles. “I think you already did once or twice last night.”
I run my fingertips down the length of her arm. “And I can’t wait to do it again.”
Memories of last night flood me, and she’s right. I do remember giving her love bites on that tasty, little booty. My dick twitches at the thought of getting her naked again and I reposition my legs.
I’m about to say screw talking and let’s get back to fucking when the bartender hands us our beers. “That’ll be seven fifty.”
I pull out my wallet. “No tab in this place?”
The brunette shakes her head and glances down at my tattooed forearms. “Not to strangers.”
If only I can tell her I can buy this place with the swipe of my debit card, but that would make me seem like an arrogant jackass, not to mention blow my cover.
I lay down two fifty dollar bills. “This should cover us for a while.”
She picks them up and holds them up to the light as we turn and take a seat at the end of the bar. Kitten sits on one side of the corner and I on the opposite side so we can so
rt of face each other.
She takes a sip of her beer and stares at me expectantly. “So what do you want to know about me?”
I swallow hard. This is a totally new experience for me. The confidence I typically have falls away from me. “I, um, I don’t know. How about we start with why you decided to give me a chance.”
She picks at the label on her bottle. “I’m not really sure. It goes against everything I came down here to do.”
I lean back in my chair. Interesting. “Exactly what were your intentions when you hooked up with me?”
She hooks a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m almost embarrassed to say.”
“I’ve already seen you naked. There’s no shame between us anymore, Kitten. Spill.”
She takes another sip and my stomach clenches. Whatever she’s about to say is going to suck. I can tell by all the tension in her body.
After a couple long seconds, she sighs. “You’re sort of my last hurrah.”
I scrunch my brow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“My mother has been on my case to quit going after your type.”
I raise my pierced eyebrow. “My type?”
A blush creeps over her cheeks. “Yeah, you know. The bad boy. The assholes. Guys that are notorious for breaking hearts.”
I hate the idea that there were jerks before me that couldn’t see how amazing she is. Not saying that I’d be any better, but at least I recognize something special when it’s in front of me. It makes me want to show her even more that I am worth a shot.
“So what changed your mind?” I ask.
She bites her lip and stares at me through those innocent eyes of hers. I hold my breath as I wait on her reply.
AUBREY
Zach’s quest for answers takes me by surprise. I never imagined that he would ever be interested in more—seems like I’m definitely standing out to him.
He waits patiently for me to reply. I know I can make or break a relationship we might have with what I say.
Rock the Heart Page 37
