No. No more.
She couldn't take it, couldn't survive it. She wouldn’t.
Almost as though answering a prayer, a voice broke through her suffering. A woman's voice. An impossible voice.
"Rhen, I'm here," Jinji whispered.
And though the words weren't spoken to her, they filled Leena's heart.
Her eyes tore open.
They found Rhen.
They found Jinji.
Her friend's lips were widened by a bright smile. Humor danced in her irises. The copper glow of her skin had returned. Pink flushed her cheeks as she fought to free her hand from Rhen's tight embrace, to touch his face. And then as Leena watched, Jinji continued speaking, undeniably alive. "I'm right here."
Mirroring Leena's own uncomprehending awe, Rhen paused, suddenly still. His eyes opened slowly, full of disbelief.
"Jin," he murmured.
A grin pulled at Leena's cheeks as the despair freezing her insides melted away, replaced by warm joy.
"I'm alive," Jinji said giddily.
"You're alive," Rhen repeated with wonder. His eyes roved over every part of her. His expression was dumbstruck. And then all at once, his tension released.
So did Leena's.
She's alive.
She's alive!
"You’re alive!" Rhen shouted, jumping to his feet and hugging Jinji close.
Leena watched from her spot on the ground, unable to contain her racing emotions. Glee practically made her chest burst as she watched the reunion, as she watched life refill both of her friends' faces. Happiness washed over the riders, a warm sprinkle that was palpable in the light breeze caressing their cheeks.
Rhen kissed Jinji. She smiled against his lips, laughing.
And Leena remained alone on the ground.
A dark spot deep in her heart stained the moment of pure bliss.
She wanted to jump to her feet.
She wanted to join them in celebration.
She wanted nothing more than to ignore the new round of grief overtaking her heart. But with the blood still staining her hands, Leena found her eyes drawn to the ruby pool, entranced by it. A face filled her eyes. Mikza. Hurt tugged at her soul. Rhen and Jinji's love was so strong it was practically tangible. And hers was so long gone that it was no more than a vision in her eyes. A memory to hold on to, and not a man, living and breathing before her.
Loneliness enveloped Leena.
Unbearable isolation.
"There is one more task that needs to be completed before we can put the war fully behind us," Jinji said loudly, pulling Leena back to the world. "There is a fifth dragon, and I need your help bringing her to life."
"Anything," Rhen confirmed.
"Anything," Bran and Jasper agreed together.
Leena nodded, unable to bring herself to speak. A tight knot sat in the base of her throat, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't swallow it away.
"I need you to ride your dragons, and when I say so, focus all of their ferocious fury on me."
"No," Rhen said immediately. "Absolutely not. I just got you back. I'm not—"
Jinji turned to him, expression softening, so full of adoration that Leena had to look away. Her eyes found the blood again.
"Rhen," Jinji murmured gently, and Leena closed her eyes, hating herself for the bundle of jealousy twisting in her gut. "I'm not going anywhere. We've both lied. We've both made mistakes by overprotecting each other, by hiding the full truth. We've both been trying to do everything on our own. And it hasn't worked. Please, trust me." A moment of silence passed. And then Jinji continued, voice stronger, speaking to all of them. "Use your full strength. Do not be nervous, and do not hold back."
No one noticed that Leena was still on the ground. That tears threatened to drip from her eyes. That she was the only one not smiling.
"Go!" Jinji commanded.
Leena didn't move. She couldn't.
A cold snout pressed against her shoulder, nudging her, drawing her attention away from the grief she couldn’t suppress.
Tempest.
The dragon slid her scales against Leena's cheek, trying to give her strength, trying to cure the grief she felt through the bond. Leena caressed her cold neck.
She wasn't alone. Not completely.
The other riders were already flying, so even though it took all of her strength, Leena stood and mounted her dragon. From there, Tempest took over, dragon leading rider.
"Now," Jinji commanded.
Water and ice roared from Tempest's throat.
Leena watched from a world away as the powers of all four dragons met in a single spot, flaring against each other, crashing in the center and merging into one another. An ivory epicenter glowed blindingly bright, spreading wider and wider as the elements continued to explode against each other. The beam brightened, blocking out the sun, pulsing with life. Until suddenly, the entire spark disappeared.
Stop.
Tempest reacted before Leena could.
All four of the dragons halted their powers.
Leena looked down, amazed to see a pearlescent dragon resting in the spot their powers had been only a moment ago. And huddled protectively beneath its wings was Jinji. When her eyes opened, they immediately found Rhen, gaze radiating with love.
Leena ran.
Not fast. Not immediately.
Tempest continued to hover while everyone else landed. She glided gently back, farther and farther away, but slowly so no one noticed. Leena wasn't sure if she were leading her dragon, or if the dragon just knew that it was time to get away. From overhead, Leena watched Rhen and Jinji's happy reunion. Then she watched Jinji race toward her brother's side, falling knees first into the pool of blood still surrounding him. Moments later, she watched as he sat up, miraculously returned from the dead just as Jinji had been.
The last sight broke her.
Tempest turned away from the mountain peak and dropped lazily down, drifting in wide circles until dragon and rider were both embraced by the crisp hug of the sea, safe beneath the surface where the signs and sights of life were muffled and unfamiliar. Leena closed her eyes, no longer afraid to cry because the ocean just washed the tears away. She was brought back to another life, to one where a pool of water had been her only escape. Only this time, there would be no handsome man to welcome her back above the surface, lifting her gently from the water and welcoming her with a kiss.
Mikza was gone.
His body had been turned to ash. It traveled now with the wind.
He could never return.
His time had passed.
Tempest stopped sinking when they reached the sand. Leena drifted just a little farther, until she came to rest in the curve of her dragon's neck, leaning against the scales. Large wings wrapped around her protectively. And in the same moment, Leena's arms drifted to her stomach, holding it close, keeping it from harm. Her finger ran over the smooth edge of her makeshift ring, remembering the man who gave it to her and the promises that once rolled sweetly from his lips.
Down here, the sun was little more than an ethereal aqua glow moving with the current. The world was sapphire. In the water, she never felt alone. Never felt lonely. Here, all of her troubles washed away. They were easier to manage. It made her never want to leave. Never want to return to the surface again.
She had the unborn child in her womb.
She had her dragon.
There was nothing else she needed.
At least, that is what Leena tried to convince herself as she closed her eyes tight, doing her best to squeeze out the pain. Listening to Tempest's steady heartbeat, she focused on calming her own, on emptying her thoughts. She wanted to drift away like a current. If only life were just as easy to manage as a changing tide, just as steady, just as simple to predict.
The sound of a soft splash drifted down from above.
Leena didn't open her eyes. She didn’t have to. The presence of another dragon was as easy to feel as her own pulse. They wer
e all connected, and she should have known she could never get away, never escape.
Moments later, warm air brushed against Leena's skin. The water around her disappeared, as though a large bubble surrounded her, holding it back.
"It's beautiful down here," Jinji whispered. "I understand why you picked this as your hiding place."
Leena turned away, curling farther into her dragon's side. "Don't look at me."
"Why?" Jinji asked, stepping closer until her hand brushed warmly against Leena's cheek, wiping away the tears that continued to fall.
"You should be with Rhen," Leena murmured. "You should be with Janu. You should be with your family."
"You are my family," Jinji said, voice unwavering and honest.
Leena finally opened her eyes. "I'm so happy you're alive."
"I know."
"I'm so happy for you and for Rhen. I'm so happy for myself, that I have not lost a dear friend. I'm happy Janu survived, that you didn't lose the brother you love so much. I'm happy for my people, for the world, that we were victorious today, that they are all safe. I'm happy for so many things…" Leena trailed off, voice lost.
Jinji watched her in silence. The look in her eyes was full of sympathy, as though she knew what was coming next.
"He would have been so proud of me, today," Leena whispered. Her throat caught. Her eyes burned. It felt as though someone had reached into her chest and pulled out her heart, wrenching her soul with it. "Of my people. If he had only seen the way they stood with each other, the way they protected one another in the face of such evil and the way they cheered with one another at the first sight of victory. For a moment, there were no tattoos. No plateaus. No divisions. There was just a single people, one Ourthuro. I just," Leena paused, taking a deep breath. She pressed on, needing to get the words out for herself, not even for Jinji. "I just wish he could have seen it. I wish we could have seen it together."
And then she broke.
"I know," Jinji said as she pulled her close, hugging Leena against her smaller frame. But in that instant, Jinji didn't feel small. She felt like the one thing Leena could cling to, and she did, pulling her friend close and burying her head in her shoulder to muffle the sobs. "He was there, Leena. Not in the way you both want, but he was with you. He always is. Just like the people I've lost are always with me. They are our motivation, our strength. They are part of everything we do."
Leena nodded, but she couldn't find the words.
Jinji didn't ask her to. She just held her until all the tears were cried out.
"I'm sorry," Leena said a while later, throat scratchy and dry.
Jinji shook her head. "For what?"
"For pulling you away from Rhen and Janu. For forcing my own grief upon you at a time when all you should feel is joy."
Jinji grasped her shoulders, forcing Leena to meet her gaze. "Don't ever apologize for the feelings in your heart, you can't help them. I didn't come here because I had to. I came because I care about you, because I understand missing a person so much that it physically hurts, because I couldn't leave you alone on a day when we should all be celebrating together. Everyone wanted to come, Rhen and Bran and Jasper," Jinji paused, smiling, filling her voice with humor. "But seeing as we're hundreds of feet below the sea, I was the only one powerful enough to find you and to bring you back."
Leena grinned. A small laugh escaped her lips.
For the first time, she actually looked around, taking in the invisible dome holding the water at bay, the two dragons curled against the sand, the soft blue glow shimmering over Jinji's cheeks. The bottom of the ocean felt like home to Leena. But she could understand why men made of fire, earth, and air would feel more comfortable on land.
"Rhen tried to follow me," Jinji said casually, and then she raised her brows, smirking. "One dip in the ocean was all it took for Firestorm to politely throw his rider from his back. For all I know, he could still be treading water, apologizing and trying to sweet talk his way into a rescue." Then she softened her expression. "Should we help him?"
Leena understood the real meaning behind that question.
Was she all right?
Was she ready to join the others?
Was she ready to let the pain of losing Mikza go, at least for now?
Leena nodded.
Both women mounted their dragons, glancing up at the far away sun.
"We'll always be there when you need us," Jinji said suddenly, still gazing up through the endless blue. "You only have to ask."
And then the bubble around them burst.
The water crashed over Leena, a warm embrace, but not the only one.
Jinji swam quickly on her ivory spirit dragon.
Leena raced to follow.
FIVE
Leena never before realized how slowly one week could pass. One week. Seven days. Fifty-two hours. Nothing. Easy.
But Leena was dying with the anticipation.
On the first day, Leena celebrated with the others, getting drunk for the first time in her life and losing herself in the revelry.
On the second, she cursed Rhen for her pounding headache and ordered Tempest to wake him with a shockingly cold splash of water to the face.
On the third, she gathered enough courage to finally reveal her plans of revolution to the other riders, who promptly offered to help in any way they could.
On the fourth, she was so on edge that Jinji ordered she go with Rhen to Rayfort to meet with the king, just to give her something to do.
On the fifth, she flew halfway to Da'astiku only to have a mysterious storm blow her in the opposite direction, stopping once she landed safely at the Gates.
On the sixth, she suffered a panic attack as her nerves took over, and she realized just how overwhelming a task she had placed on her own shoulders.
And on the seventh, she woke before dawn and waited impatiently for the sky to turn lavender before soaring toward Ourthuro, perfectly self-assured and absolutely prepared to do whatever needed to be done. The others had offered to come with her, to show their support, but Leena had waved them off. This was her fight. This was Ourthuro's fight. And it was enough for Leena to know her friends were behind her in spirit. Their support gave her strength, just as Mikza's memory gave her faith.
As the sparkling shoreline of her homeland glittered into view, Leena leaned over Tempest's back, lying flat so they flew as fast as possible. Unlike the last time, no nerves washed over her. There was only a hot punch of iron determination. Leena was made of ice and steel, the powers of the water rider mixed with an Ourthuri hardness inbred since birth. If Mikza could see her now, she wasn't sure he would recognize her. Yet at the same time, she was perfectly at ease in her body. No longer a girl, but finally the woman she was always meant to be.
Leena had made a promise to herself long ago that love would be her weapon—that love would bring King Razzaq to his knees. At the time, her mind had thought only of Mikza, of their loss and of their hope, of their dreams. But soaring toward her home now, Da'astiku just sprouting to life in the distance, Leena realized that love of a man was not the only kind fueling her actions. There were so many other types of love that powered her and gave her strength—that fortified her conviction. Love of her home. Love of her people. Love of her culture and the possibilities she saw there. Love of a sibling. Love of a friend. Love of an unborn child whom she wanted to gift with a better life. Love of an amazing man. And love of the woman he helped her become.
When she thought of all the love in her life, she no longer felt alone. Instead, she felt pity and sadness for the man she was about to face, a man whose heart was filled only with greed and hate and selfishness. A man who was so utterly alone and so utterly lost that he didn't realize what he was missing. Her father thought to make love a crime because he could not find it for himself, and what the king didn't have, no one else could. But love wasn't meant to be broken or tied down or contained. It was meant to explode out into the world. It was meant to be shared and disp
layed and available for the taking.
That was all Leena wanted.
To fill the streets of Ourthuro with love.
For her people to welcome it and not fear it.
But as she soared over her home, the streets were bare. There were no people. No sounds. No flashes of movement. Nothing.
Her heartbeat faltered.
A thought she hadn't dared consider entered her mind.
What if no one else was willing to fight with her?
She had hoped to fly into a city already stirring with revolution, not one so quiet it appeared in hiding.
What if her father's influence was too overpowering? What if the people were too afraid to face him, even with a dragon on their side? What if they liked Ourthuro the way it was and didn't see the possibilities Leena saw?
This wasn't a fight she could win alone.
Sure, she could soar to the golden palace and put a sword through her father's heart easily enough. But what then? The people needed to want change in order for change to occur. They had to fight for it together or it would never come.
Just as doubt began to curl her insides, weakening her strength, a figure in the distance caught her eyes.
Leena grinned.
Tam was waiting for her. He stood alone in the middle of the bridge connecting the silver levels of the city to the common populace below. Casually, he leaned against the metal arch with his arms crossed. To the unsuspecting viewer, he seemed like no more than a man taking in the view of the rising sun. But to Leena, he was everything.
Their eyes met.
They spoke without words.
Tam nodded slightly, eyes fierce and aglow with excitement.
He was ready. The people were ready.
Which meant Leena had to be ready too. And she was.
Breaking contact, Leena shot up, racing for the golden palace as Tempest screeched into the air. The dragon cry echoed, bouncing from metal house to metal house, reverberating from plateau to plateau, shaking the very foundations of the city. And unbeknownst to Leena, that piercing roar was the signal of the revolution. Bodies emerged from the shadows, armed with swords and axes and knives. Eyes found her in the sky. A mass of people followed her path, marching slowly toward the king.
Leena's Story - The Complete Novellas (A Dance of Dragons Book 4) Page 20
