by Anna Lowe
Tim cleared his throat. “Anyway, I do it now too. I get the coffee and cake out, just like her. Not as good as your coffee, of course.” He faked a smile, trying to lighten the mood.
Hailey smiled, hiding the sadness inside. Both of them needed to start a whole new chapter in their lives. Too bad it wasn’t in the cards that they could try that together.
She cupped her mug in both hands and took a sip. “It’s great,” she said, looking deep into his eyes. Then she set the mug down and picked up the coffee cake. “But there’s no way I’m just looking at this cake.”
He laughed and picked up his own, watching her. Daring her, almost.
She took a huge bite and nearly moaned at the taste. “See?” she mumbled through the crumbs. “You’re corrupting me.”
He shook his head. “Nah. Just helping you find freedom again.”
Finding freedom for the first time was more like it, but she wasn’t about to spoil the moment with those details.
A minute ticked by peacefully, and she wished it were an hour. Life was so much clearer from a place like this. A modest place in peaceful surroundings with a huge view. Her eyes slid over to Tim, already regretting the future she would never have with him. Her mouth filled with a bitter taste — not the coffee, but the memory of Jonathan.
“You okay?” Tim murmured, tuned in, as ever, to the slightest change in her mood. Hurrying to make things better if he could.
She made a face. “Just wondering what I ever saw in Jonathan.”
A few quiet seconds ticked by before Tim spoke. “Freedom?”
She sighed. “Obviously, I was kidding myself. But, yes.” She closed her eyes, remembering. “I think I saw a way back to a quieter, simpler life. He has a ranch in Montana. Two thousand acres of peace and quiet. Kind of a play ranch, but still. It was easy to picture myself there.”
“Why not buy your own ranch?” Tim asked softly.
She frowned. “And live way out in the middle of nowhere alone?” She shook her head. “I like the idea of settling down in a quiet, out-of-the-way place with someone special.” Someone like you, she nearly said. “But not alone. Besides, a ranch is a lot of work.” She smiled faintly. “I do have a little land way out in northern Montana. My great-grandparents lived there for years. Just a little cabin.” She laughed out loud as a new realization came to her. “My mother was always pushing for something bigger and better, but I guess all I really want is a small, cozy place. Like my great-grandparents’ cabin.”
“Like the house at Pu’u Pu’eo,” Tim added with a smile.
She nodded and waved around. “Like this house.”
Tim’s eyes caught hers, and she saw an entire happy future unwind in them. A future she’d love to share, but oops. He’d already made it clear the answer was no. And if she didn’t respect that, she’d be no better than Jonathan.
“Anyway,” she said, moving on quickly. “Maybe that’s where I’ll start. That place in Montana. I could fix it up and finally do it justice.” Then she frowned. “What does it say about me that I love the idea partly because my mother hated the place?”
Tim shook his head. “It just says you’ve had enough. Nothing wrong with that.”
She took another bite of coffee cake, moving it slowly around her mouth with her tongue. She’d had enough, all right. Enough of strict diets and harried schedules. Enough of other people running her life.
A footpath led down the center of the property, and the sight of Dell sauntering toward the main house brought back the memory of what she’d seen that morning.
“That,” Hailey said without thinking. “That’s what I want.”
Tim looked skeptical. “You want Dell?”
She play-kicked his foot. “No, I do not want Dell.” I want you. “I want to be able to tune everything out. To concentrate on me.”
Tim laughed. “Dell is good at that, all right.” He put his elbows on the table and rested his chin in his hands. “What else do you want?”
She snorted. “Where do I start?” But then she caught herself. “No, that’s not fair. I already have so much. Shouldn’t be greedy, you know.”
But Tim insisted. “Seriously. Run with it. What do you want?”
She stirred her coffee and licked the spoon, watching the liquid swirl. “Peace, I guess. Quiet. Time to think.”
Tim nodded her on.
She considered. “I want to be normal. Meet normal people. Do normal things.”
He tilted his head. “Like what?”
It was funny how fine company and fresh air got her thinking. “Going out for a meal. Just something simple, like we did on the beach. Before Lamar came along.” She frowned then pushed away the bad parts of that memory. “I’d go for a walk through town, just because. Window-shop. Maybe even look at the stars.”
“The stars, huh?”
She sighed. “Yeah. Kind of hokey, huh?”
He shook his head. “No. Not in the least.”
Licking one finger, she collected the last of the crumbs from her plate and held it up. “See? Greedy.”
He laughed. “If everyone used your definition of greedy, the world would be a better place. Want another piece?”
She did, but she’d already overindulged and was about to say as much when Tim spoke.
“One more day.”
She blinked. “What?”
“Stay. Please. Just one more day. It will give you a little more time to figure things out, and it will give me time to…uh…” A sly look came over his face as he trailed off.
“To what?”
He shook his head and stood quickly. “Not telling. Not yet.”
She stared. What was he up to?
“Do you trust me?” he murmured.
She snorted. “Do you have to ask?”
He grinned. “Okay, then. You stay one more day and figure out what you’ll do next. In the meantime, I have some planning to do too.” He checked his watch. “Two hours, maybe three. You okay with that?”
She stared. “And then what?”
He flashed a mysterious smile. “Leave it to me.”
Chapter Fifteen
“Not sure that’s such a great idea, man,” Dell said, scratching his ear.
Tim grimaced. He knew perfectly well that planning a day out for Hailey wasn’t a good idea. But still…
“She deserves it, damn it.”
She did. A little normalcy made special because she’d missed all the little things for so long. Things he could relate to, having hankered for them after so many tours of duty in dusty corners of the globe.
“Not sayin’ she doesn’t.” Dell’s voice slowed to a concerned drawl as he continued. “But it’s gonna be awfully hard to let her go after.” Tim scoffed, but Dell pressed on. “I’ve seen the way you look at her.”
Tim scowled. “What?”
“The way you look at her. And not just because she’s gorgeous, even if she is.”
“Bet your ass it’s not about that,” he snarled. Hailey was so much more than a pretty face. She was like…like one of those caged animals he’d always yearned to set free.
Dell stuck his hands up in defense. “That’s the scary part, man. It’s exactly the way Connor looked at Jenna all that time he tried to resist her. Do I need to remind you he failed?”
Failed? Tim’s bear protested. He succeeded. He won his mate in the end.
But that was different, and Tim knew it, because Hailey would never accept his shifter side.
Yes, it would hurt like hell to let her go. But he wanted to give her this one last gift. It had taken everything he had to tame his inner grizzly’s urges to claim her outright, but now, he had the upper hand. At least, he hoped he did.
Dell leaned closer. “Better to cut your losses while you’re ahead, man. Let her go.”
Inside, Tim’s bear roared and raged, but Tim held perfectly still. “Just do it,” he barked, then caught himself. “Please. I need to do this, and I need your help.”
Dell
sighed and ran a hand over his stubbly chin. He’d shaved that morning, but thick blond scruff had already grown in. By evening, he’d have a pretty decent beard. Typical lion shifter, in other words.
“I’ll do it, but I only have until six. Same with Chase. We have to work tonight.”
Tim nodded curtly. “Thanks.”
Dell sighed. “Not sure you’ll be thanking me later.” Then he slapped Tim on the back. “Love hurts, man. Better you remember that.”
Tim would have snorted if Dell’s words hadn’t had a flat ring of pain. Whatever had happened to Dell, it happened before they’d met, and Dell had never talked about it. Tim guessed the Casanova act had to do with Dell protecting his heart. The lion didn’t mess around with as many women as his reputation suggested, but even when he did get involved, he refused to open his heart.
“Dell! Dell!” Joey ran up, waving and grinning.
“Heya, Joey,” Dell called, brightening immediately.
“Want to play tag?”
“Tag? Hell yes. I’m it.” He roared and sprinted at Joey, who squealed and ran as Dell made one exaggerated leap after another, purposely missing the boy each time.
Tim watched them go. Refusing to grow up was another one of Dell’s self-defense mechanisms. The lion shifter practically made irresponsibility an art form. But he would follow through on his promise, Tim knew. Which meant Hailey would have double the security for the first half of what he had planned.
And that meant everything was falling into place. Hunter had assured him that Hailey’s mother and Jonathan had left Maui. And he’d already met with Connor, who’d done background checks on both. The mother was an open-and-shut case, but Jonathan…
“I’m telling you, those people are bad news,” Connor had said. “Should have known by the double last name.”
“Known what?”
Connor wrinkled his nose. “Old money. Oil money. Pure snobs.”
Yeah, you could say Connor still had a chip on his shoulder about that kind of thing, even with Jenna’s influence to file down the rougher patches of his soul.
“The dad is a major player, like you guessed. The oldest son is running for Senate, and all indications are that he’ll win. The third son is in rehab, not that they’re calling it that.” Connor paused long enough to shake his head before going on. “There’s a sister who’s engaged to another oil baron, and word has it they’re looking to expand the empire.”
“So what’s with running for public office, then?” Tim had asked.
“Think about it. There’s not much new oil left to discover. It’s all about getting access to protected land. And with a couple of sons in the Senate…”
Tim nodded slowly. “They could push through new laws making it easier to drill.”
The very thought of pristine lands opened up to oil concerns made him sick. The last refuge for so many bears and other free-roaming mammals would be destroyed.
“The bastards are slick enough to pull it off, too,” Connor added. “They have contacts in all the right places, not to mention the ability to lie with a straight face, even if it’s on their mother’s grave.”
Tim’s bear claws pushed toward the surface when he thought of Jonathan dragging Hailey into that world. But he’d harbored enough anger for one day. Jonathan was gone, as was Lamar, who was being watched by Kai’s contacts on the mainland. Hailey would be safe, so he could concentrate on giving her what she needed most.
Freedom, even if it was just a taste.
Freedom, his bear murmured as he strode across the property.
“Don’t forget this,” Connor said, coming up with an envelope addressed to Hailey from a lawyer’s office, delivered care of the Kapa’akea Resort.
Tim felt a couple of ID and credit cards inside, and Connor grinned. “Good news. Now she can go home.”
Tim nearly growled, but Connor softened his expression and added, “Better for both of you, you know.”
Yeah, he knew. But damn it, he was trying out pretending for a change.
Connor froze, studying him closely. Really closely. “Or maybe not better,” he concluded. “You serious about her?”
Tim kept his lips in a tight, thin line. If he let one or two of his feelings out, the rest might follow, and that wouldn’t do.
A faint smile formed on Connor’s lips. “I guess you are.”
Tim frowned. No, he wasn’t. He couldn’t be.
Yes, I am, his bear insisted. It’s destiny.
Connor leaned in and spoke in a hush. “Sometimes you got to fight for what you want, you know? If you really want it, that is.”
Tim stared at the ground. He’d never shied away from fighting for a just cause, no matter how slim the odds. But the odds of Hailey accepting him — a shifter who could change into a wild beast — were damn near impossible after what Lamar had done.
“What if it’s a losing battle?” he muttered, kicking the ground.
Connor tipped his head one way then the other and finally backed away. “Your call, man. All I’m saying is the heart doesn’t lie.”
Tim closed his eyes. A lying heart wasn’t his problem. The fact that he was a shifter was.
“Gotta go,” he murmured, turning away. There was no use torturing himself. He had an evening with Hailey — one evening to squeeze a whole lifetime into. And damn it, he’d make it good.
So he took off, concentrating on putting the rest of his plan in place. Then he forced himself to stretch his usual five-minute shower to fifteen and took out the straight-blade razor he saved for important occasions. Which meant he was using it for the first time in years, because nothing had ever felt quite as important as this.
Joey wandered by the back of the barn where the men’s showers were and stopped at the sight of the blade.
“Wow. Can I touch it?”
Tim grinned. Cynthia would have a fit if he let her son anywhere near that razor. Which made it awfully tempting to do just that. Cynthia needed to loosen up — a lot. But he wasn’t about to get in hot water with the dragon shifter on an evening as important as this.
He held out the tin cup of shaving cream. “Sorry, kiddo. No razor. But do you want to whip this up?”
Never in the history of mankind had anyone whipped shaving cream as earnestly as Joey did. When he was done, Tim turned a bucket over as a seat and let Joey watch as he moved the blade over his neck and chin. Somewhere in the distance, a bird sang, and a truck rumbled by on the distant road. Otherwise, the plantation was quiet enough to hear the dull scrape of the blade.
“What do you think?” he asked Joey after finishing one side.
Joey pointed. “You missed a spot.”
He dabbed a bit of cream on Joey’s nose and had a closer look in the mirror. “You’re good at this, kiddo.”
Joey nodded eagerly. “Daddy used to shave like this.”
Tim’s jaw clenched. Shit. No wonder the kid was so fascinated. But, damn. What exactly did a guy say to something like that? Tim didn’t know squat about Joey’s father other than he’d died not too long ago in a dragon fight.
“Oh, yeah?” He forced himself to continue. Deadbeat dads like his own, he could write a book about. But losing a devoted father…
“Yep,” Joey said. He was smiling, which was good. “But his hair was red.”
Tim stopped long enough to tousle Joey’s. “Like yours, huh?” The kid grinned from ear to ear. “I guess that means you’ll be a mighty dragon someday, too.”
“Someday,” Joey said, nodding earnestly.
Tim swallowed away the lump in his throat and got to work on the other side. “So I guess I can teach you how to shave like this someday.”
Joey practically jumped off the bucket in glee. “You will?”
“You bet.” Tim wiped the cream off his face and turned so Joey could see both sides. “How do I look?”
“Nicer,” Joey said promptly.
Tim laughed. “Nicer? What do I look like most of the time?”
Joe
y shrugged. “Like a bear. A really strong one.”
Tim ran a hand over his chin and checked the mirror. He supposed that translated to menacing. Well, nicer worked for him, especially tonight.
He took the mug and swirled the brush on each of Joey’s cheeks, making him giggle.
“Here,” Tim said, lifting Joey so he could look in the mirror. “Now you can practice.” He took Joey’s index finger and ran it along each cheek like a blade. “Oops. Missed a spot.” Then he covered the boy’s head with the towel and gave him a good rub. “All set?”
Joey popped out of the towel, beaming. His hair was a mess, but what the heck. The important thing was, a conversation that could have gone either way had wrapped up on a good note.
“All set,” Joey replied.
“Well, I gotta go. What are you doing tonight?”
Joey jumped off the bucket. “Mommy and I are watching Jurassic Park.”
“Not too scary?”
Joey shook his head, then looked around and whispered, “I cover my eyes on the scary parts.”
Tim laughed and patted him on the back. “I do that too. Have a good time.”
And off the kid ran, leaving Tim to dress in his best jeans and his only polo shirt. He walked home, lost in thoughts of mothers and fathers. Of families that stuck together through thick or thin. Of resilience and the joy to be found in little things.
He slowed, sniffing the breeze.
Little things, his bear murmured, nodding him toward the right side of the path.
He plucked a perfect white plumeria and twirled it in his fingers the rest of the way home. The closer he came, the faster his pulse skipped. And when his nose led him around the back to where Hailey sat on his makeshift patio, he stopped. She was cupping a fresh mug of coffee with her eyes closed and her head tipped back. Her hair shone in the afternoon sun, and a sheet of paper lay on the table before her, full of notes, circles, and cross-outs. Her plan for the future, he supposed. There was even a sketch of a house in the corner. Her cabin in Montana, maybe?
He was seized by the urge to grab that piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it away, as if that would prevent Hailey from leaving. But he got himself under control and went back to pretending — a habit that had more going for it than he’d ever appreciated before. Hailey was right. Pretending was okay every once in a while.
