by Nicole Marie
I knew I didn’t owe him anything, having only met him the night before. But even after he was sweet and friendly at the bar, and I felt guilty for leaving him in the morning without saying goodbye. Now I did feel like I owed him something.
“My brother owns this place,” he said cheerily. “I come and visit him every now and then, although it’s really not my scene.”
I nodded at him and rubbed my hand against my neck, my fingers tracing the bite marks consciously. His eyes flicked to my neck for a moment and then back to my face as I smiled. “Oh, that’s a funny coincidence,” I laughed nervously.
I stood there awkwardly in silence for a moment before he extended his elbow to me to take his arm like he had done the night before. “Can I buy you a drink?”
I smiled and stepped towards him, but I really wasn’t in the mood for another drink. “Honestly, I really just want to get home. I was about to go find the train station.”
“You realize it’s the middle of the night?” he said, teasingly to me. “You won’t be able to get the train back to London at this time.”
I sighed and nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. I don’t even know where to begin looking for the train station. My phone and my wallet are at home, and to be honest, I have no idea how I was gonna find my way back to Camden.”
I realized then that I’d given him more information than I intended, but I was grateful that he didn’t seem to pry. He looked at me with concern for a moment, but didn’t ask any questions. “So, can I buy you a drink?”
I sighed and nodded. “Okay, but I’m definitely gonna have to chase it with the water. After last night’s whiskeys and this morning’s hangover, I really don’t know how much more I can drink.”
He laughed at that and led me through the door towards the bar. Music was loud and I could feel it in my bones as we walked through the sweaty crowd of people dancing and grinding together. He pulled me through the dense crowd and to the bar, and ordered a whiskey and water from me, and a jim and coke for himself.
He turned to me and smiled and waited expectantly for me to say something. I simply looked him into his eyes for a long moment as I thought of what to say. Finally, I ran my hand awkwardly through my hair and said, “I’m so sorry for leaving this morning, James. I really didn’t want you to feel any sort of obligation to me, so I thought it would be best if I just went home.”
He frowned and nodded but then that beautiful quick smile of his came right back to his face. “It’s okay. I completely understand. Besides, it’s not like you would’ve gone away completely. I could’ve just followed your sent home.” He winked at me, and I laughed. I wasn’t sure whether to take that as a compliment or to feel creeped out. But I guess as a shifter, his sense of smell was better than I thought. The idea that any of these men could’ve followed me home, though, was a bit unnerving.
“So, sorry, but I have to ask. How did you end up in Oxford with no wallet or phone?”
I sighed and figured that he would eventually have to ask that question. “I came here with a friend, but left my purse and jacket at home. It’s a bit of a long story.” I to a sip of the whiskey and set it back down on the bar. I didn’t think I could drink anymore as I instead proceeded to gulp down a glass of water that the bartender had brought out as well. The water felt cool in my throat, and I drank the whole glass in one go.
“Wow, you’re thirsty,” James teased. I laughed and nodded and then asked and ordered another water from the bartender. “You look exhausted,” he said finally to me as I proceeded to gulp down the second glass of water. I looked up at him and nodded and sighed sleepily. It’d been a long day, and I really just wanted to get home to my own city apartment and my own shady bed.
“How about I drive you home?” he offered as he took the nearly-empty water from my hands and took a sip himself.
I smiled at him and nodded. “That would be amazing, yes. Thank you.” I chugged the rest of my water and put the empty glass on the bar, and he wrapped his right arm around me and pulled me in for a half hug.
“Alright. Let’s get you home.”
11
I felt a soft hand graze my cheek and I nuzzled into it in response. Opening my eyes slowly, I took a few long seconds to gather my bearings. I looked to my right through the glass window of a car and made out the faint lines of my apartment building. And then I turned to my left and saw James smiling at me, his eyes sympathetic and warm.
“Oh shit,” I said quickly, shaking myself awake. I must’ve fallen asleep on the drive back to London, and I didn’t even remember the car ride. “I’m so sorry I fell asleep.”
“It’s okay. You were obviously extremely tired.” James smiled and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear affectionately. “Why don’t you go up to your apartment and go to bed.”
I yawned sleepily and nodded and unbuckled my seatbelt. “Thank you so much for the ride home, James. I seriously owe you one.” I opened the door and then paused, turning back to him. “I’m so sorry I walked out on you this morning without saying anything,” I said. I really did feel bad, especially given the fact that he’s been so nice to me today and even drove me home after knowing full well what I was doing with other shifters.
“Don’t mention it,” he said. “I mean it, don’t even think on it. I was happy to see you again tonight.” He then reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a pen. “Here. I can give you my number. Call me anytime.” He reached out and pulled my hand towards him, writing his phone number on the palm of my hand.
He then squeezed my hand and let it go, pushing the unlock button on the car door. I smiled and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek and thanked him again. I then turned to push myself out of the car to make my way sleepily up into my apartment to catch up on some much needed sleep.
I couldn’t quite wrap my brain around what happened today and even this night. Now I needed some serious time to process everything. For now, though, my priority was sleep. And taking a really hot shower.
Before entering the front door of my apartment building, I turned and waved as James pulled his car away and drove down the street and disappeared. Not that I knew many people in London, but he was only person I knew that actually had a car.
Siebel, my landlord, just took the tube everywhere, and I wondered if he had a bunch of money. I shook the thought from my mind as obviously it didn’t matter. I turned back towards my door and unlocked it and slowly made my way up the winding three flights of stairs to my apartment. I was surprised for a moment when I found my door unlocked, and then I remembered the events of the morning. I shook my head in lieu of my stupidity of so willingly following two vampires out of my apartment. It all ended well, I guess, and from the ache I felt between my legs, I figured the adventure was at least worth it. Tonight would be one for the books, that was for sure.
I stepped into my apartment and pulled by the door closed behind me, locking it with a click. Not that the lock would keep out vampires, but the feeling of security at least made me feel better. I immediately pulled off my sweater and my pants and walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower as hot as it would go. As soon as the small room filled the steam, I stepped under the burning hot water and let it wash over me. The heat burned my skin, but it felt good. I loved the way it ran down along my body, washing away the evidence of my little escapade at the club. I lathered my loofah with soap and scrub my body almost raw, and it felt incredibly good.
I surprised myself tonight, and I couldn’t help the smile that spread across my lips. Maybe this new me wasn’t so pathetic after all.
When the water began to run cold, I stepped out of the shower and toweled myself dry. I want to my bedroom and pulled on a pair of baggy grey sweatpants and a black tank top, before getting into bed and curling up sleepily. I reached for my phone that I left on my dresser and saw that it was nearly 4 o’clock in the morning. I shook my head in disbelief and then quickly saved James’ number in my phone before the ink rubbed off. Then I turned t
he phone off and put it in the top drawer.
I was exhausted, but there was no way I was going to be able to sleep with the memory of everything that happened flooding into my mind. At least Erik’s chatter had subsided somewhat, and I could focus on my own thoughts for now.
I sighed when I realized sleep wasn’t going take me, so I reached for my laptop on the floor next to the bed. I flipped open the computer and opened the web browser, and typed into the search bar the names of my missing colleagues. A series of news articles came up discussing the disappearance, but they didn’t provide me any updates.
After leaving the force so abruptly, and refusing to make contact with anyone since then, I knew for a fact that they wouldn’t be happy if I reached out to them now. I had abandon ship, and it was an unforgivable act. They probably assumed I’d be dead by now, but seeing as my name didn’t appear on any of the news articles, I doubted that they cared.
I flipped through a few of the articles that I had already read as a knot began to form in my stomach. I knew everyone assumed them to be dead, but I at least hoped that there were people still looking. I still had little memory of that night when Erik bit me, and it’s even more confusing how I ended up back home, perfectly safe. Something must’ve happened to my colleagues that night, and now that I had enough time on my hands and a new sense of identity, might as well see what I could do to find them.
I sat there staring at the computer screen idly for a while, and the chatter began to pick up again in my mind. And I then had a thought. Of course, Erik would know what the hell happened to my colleagues. He was probably the one responsible for their deaths. Or worse, he might have them hold up and using them to feed on.
The sickening feeling shot through my body and I shuddered. Anger then welled up in my mind, and it wasn’t my own. Eric must’ve felt my thoughts and I sensed his reaction.
“Yeah, you better damn right be talking angry. Bloodsucking murderer,” I said through gritted teeth. I then leaned back in bed and pulled the blankets over my head.
“I didn’t murder your friends,” a voice spoke back in my mind. I flung the sheets off me and set up in a jolt of fear. I looked around me and my heart raced, but there was nobody there. And sat extremely still and realized the voice had come from my head. “Erik?” I thought back.
“Yes,” the voice sounded again. The voice was all too familiar as I just heard it in person that very morning. Goosebumps appeared on the arms and a shiver went up my spine. My skin grew cold as I realized the implications of what had happened. He could hear my thoughts, and now he could speak to me.
“How the fuck are you talking to me right now?” My heart beat loudly in my chest as I waited for him to answer.
“I’m not exactly sure,” he replied. I waited for him to say more, but my mind went quiet.
“How long have you been able to read my thoughts?”I waited a few moments and no answer came. “Answer me, vampire!”
“I don’t know,” his voice hissed. “I’ve always been able to sense you, but only now can I hear your voice in my mind.”
“Why is this only happening now?”Again another long silence. “You better fucking answer me, I swear to God, Erik, I’m gonna come over there and stab you with a stake in the heart.” Anger built up inside of me as I heard him laugh. “It’s not fucking funny.”
His voice suddenly became overwhelmingly gentle, and a sense of calm flooded my mind. “You could try that, but seeing as I don’t have the beating heart, I don’t think you’ll have much of an effect on me.”
I thought about that for a moment and then tried to draw in my memory the articles I read on vampires. I realized nothing I’d read actually mentioned a stake, and I must’ve pulled that stupid idea from television shows and movies. I groaned to myself but didn’t answer him.
“Well given the fact that our mental connection seems to be growing stronger,” his voice said in my mind. “We’re going to have to have a serious talk about your behaviour.”
I sat there and huffed in my bed as boiling anger wrapped up inside of my body. “Fuck you.”
“After the night you’ve had?” A bitter chuckle sounded in my mind, giving me the feeling his laugh wasn’t one of joy.
“That’s none of you God damn business,” I said angrily. I was speaking out loud now, not that I really needed to. He seemed to be able to sense my thoughts, but I couldn’t keep my anger inside. I needed to scream at someone, or hit something. I clenched my fists around my blankets, and before I realized what I was doing, I had torn my duvet and feathers had scattered in the air in front of me.
I pushed my duvet off me and began pacing back and forth in my bedroom.
“I need you to explain what’s happening to me,” I finally said after taking a few collective breaths. “I don’t understand it, I don’t like it, and I absolutely cannot let it fucking continue like this.”
I felt giving demands to a vampire wasn’t going to get me very far, considering the fact that he was the head vampire of the entire local coven and I was nothing but a identity-less tramp living in a rundown apartment in Camden. But I knew in my heart that I had to do everything that I could to break this connection with Erik. I refused to share what ever pathetic existence that now remained with him.
“You know just as much as I,” his voice finally echoed in my mind. “Perhaps this is better discussed in person.” He sounded tired. Could vampires even be tired?
I shook my head and then realized he couldn’t see me. “Absolutely not. Not happening. Don’t you dare send anymore of your lackeys over here to drag me into a meeting with you.”
“From what I understand, you came quite willingly.” He now sounded amused.
I rolled my eyes. “What the hell was I supposed to do, fight two vampires in my own home?”
Another long silence came and I stopped pacing. I rubbed my eyes in exhaustion and then made my way back to my bed and collapsed in a defeated heap on the mattress. I began to shake uncontrollably, whether out of exhaustion or shock, I didn’t know.
“Are you okay?”
His question made me pause. Was he genuinely concerned about my well-being? I shook my head again, knowing full well that there’s no way that that was what he had intended.
I ran my hands down along my body and my hands rested between my legs. My body was sore and the idea that he had been present to the entire night at the club made me feel like I was on display. It was an invasion of privacy. “This can’t be happening,” I whispered.
“I’m afraid, it is.”
“Stay the fuck out of my head.”
“Oh, Miss Rose. You have no idea how much I wish I could.”
12
I had spent the past few days alone in my apartment, not seeing so much as a person apart from when I ordered take out once a day.
I couldn’t wrap my brain around this whole thought sharing thing with Erik, and I refused to go out and interact with other people if he was able to listen in on everything I said. It is one thing for him to invade my thoughts, but for him to invade other people’s conversations was taking it just that one step too far.
It took us a couple days to get used to the new shared emotions, and at any given time I wasn’t sure if I was the one feeling something or if it was him.
I woke up exhausted and angry yesterday with no reason to be. Stocking round in my room, hating the world, angry and bitter and full of self-loathing, it took a while to realize that I wasn’t feeling this way at all. Erik was.
I now began every day by looking myself in the mirror and telling myself how I felt. It took a while to differentiate my own feelings from his, but eventually I figured it out. It was the fifth day that I had spent alone that I began to get anxious inside.
I’d completely blocked out his thoughts, at least I thought I had. Realistically, he was probably finally just giving me some privacy. I didn’t want to ruin the peace, so I never tested it by thinking anything out loud that he might respond to. It was a c
onscious effort to keep my thoughts to myself, despite the fact that he obviously could still hear them. But I tried very hard not to ask any questions or think anything that he might feel the need to get involved with.
I lay in bed staring up at the ceiling, and it was around noon on Saturday. It was raining outside, and the dampness on the window set in and I covered myself with a blanket stay warm. I rolled back and forth and tossed and turned in bed, and then got up and began pacing the room again. I desperately needed to go out and see people. Anyone, really. It wasn’t healthy to stay cooped up inside with no one to talk to.
Well, I suppose I did have someone to talk to, but I was determined not to talk to him at all.
With a loud yawn and a big stretch, I pushed myself out of bed and walked into the bathroom to stare myself in the mirror again. I was feeling anxious and I needed to tell myself that everything was going to be okay. To remind myself that I was still here, with my own thoughts and my own identity.
Standing in front of the mirror for a few long moments, I thought back to James and how kind and generous he’d been to me, and I had the sudden urge to reach out to him. He was exactly the kind of company I needed. For the past few days, I’ve been a complete slob and not showered. I felt disgusting, my hair was greasy and my clothes were stained, evidence that I would need to shower before I talked to anyone in person.
I walked out to my bed and turned my phone on for the first time in five days. And then went back into the bathroom as I dialed his number. He answered on the third ring, and the familiarity and warmth of his voice filled me with joy.
