“Bloody Christ! You hit me in the nose!” William spats, and Lily growls at him.
“Shut the fudge up, wanker.” She pinches his thigh.
“You fucking pillock,” he curses.
Lily and I huff out, “What?”
***
“How was your day, princesa? I got your rabbit food,” Grey says as he enters my office.
“Grey!” I exclaim, feeling my heart jump out of my chest. I push away from the desk and run toward him. He quickly sets the paper bags down and catches me, lifting me off the ground and spinning. I giggle and hold on tightly, peppering his neck with kisses.
He pulls me back, and I beam up at him, admiring his dimples and the dark hair falling over his forehead. “I’m guess your day was good?”
“More than good.” I nod enthusiastically, grabbing the bags with one hand and his hand with my other. I guide him over to the desk. I set the bags on the desk and have him sit in the chair and get onto the desk, knowing I’d be too caught up in looking up into his mesmerizing eyes and betraying hair. I am too excited to be caught up in all…that.
“So, are you going to tell me about your awesome day?” he chimes sarcastically as he shoves fries from his greasy bag into his mouth.
I throw daggers at him, but he dodges them all, taking them in stride. I finish chewing some of my wonderful salad before finally telling him, “I got to see all the ins and out of the institute. I trailed a really good doctor named Dr. Jacobs. Anyway, she had this session with a boy named Brody. He was seven years old with a whole lot of problems. Like short term memory loss, anger issues, the whole nine yards. And she couldn’t really get through to him, but he and I sort of clicked mentally or something, and he let me play with his G.I. Joe toys!”
Grey stares up at me, mouth open, fries near his face. “Um, how does that excite you at all?” He finishes his mission of getting the fries in his mouth. “I’ve been in asylums long enough to know nothing excitable comes out of spending time in one.”
“But I connected with him, Grey,” I squeal, and he looks at me, confused again. “It may seem small, but it means I have a natural knack for it. Maybe like I was born to help these kids.”
“Don’t go planning your appreciation parade, Mother Theresa,” he jokes, and I flush, hating how cheesy I sound about my passion.
“It’s not like that. It’s just…” I stare out at the expansive city behind him and sigh. “I don’t know, it makes me feel like I’m on the right track. Eight-year-old Liv would be so proud of me.”
Grey takes my hand with a small smile, but I know he’s radiant on the inside. “She should be, and I am proud of you, too. You’re almost at the top, babe. Just a few figureheads you gotta sabotage to get there.”
I laugh, pulling my hand away to fan him away jokingly. He merely laughs. “There will be no sabotage. Only hard work.”
“How did I know you’d say that?” He waves a fry at his mouth teasingly.
“Because you know me somewhat.” I shrug and wink at him, stabbing a few of the remainders of my salad. I bite my lip as his eyes grow dark, hooded.
“Somewhat?” He throws his bag to the ground and stands up. “I am somewhat offended.”
“Too bad.” I stick my tongue at him.
He takes my salad container and tosses it to the ground, making a complete mess.
I gasp like he just punched me in the gut, ‘cause it really feels like he did. “Grey! I wasn’t done with—”
His lips crashing into mine shuts me up instantly. “Shut up,” he demands, voice low and gritty. “I’m not lying when I say I know you. Like how I know you want me between your legs…” He rubs my bare thighs, and I moan slightly, igniting his smirk.
I lick my lips and nod slightly, eager for what’s to come. I briefly hear the unbuckling of his belt as he smashes his lips on mine. I grab the back of his neck and arch my back, pressing my body flush against his. I yelp in his mouth when his hands slap against my bare thighs before they slink up my fitted green dress. He sucks in a sharp breath as my dress bunches at my hips and my white lacy panties are on display.
“You’re fucking soaked,” he whispers haughtily, eyes low and dark as he plays with the small ribbon on the front. His hands slide in, and his thumb presses against me without warning. “And because of me. All for me. Only me, got it?” He grazes his teeth along my jaw, biting lightly and sucking hard.
“Lower,” I breathe, not wanting to sport a visible hickey on my jaw.
“I said: only mine, got it?” he reiterates, tone agitated.
I gasp as he thrusts two fingers in me. “Y-yes.”
“Gonna have any guests for lunch, princess?” he asks, breath hot against my neck. I lick my lips, enjoying the dominance that overtakes him when we are like this—intimate, raw, passionate. “Huh?” His fingers curl upward, and I gasp in pleasure, nearly screaming in pleasure. His fingers, oh my. They can…oh, wow.
“N-no,” I answer him.
“Good.” I feel his crooked smile of trouble against my heated skin. “Now, for dessert…”
Chapter Sixteen
“Wha—oh God!” I gasp in surprise as I am suddenly flipped and pushed down on the desk. I can’t even hide my smile as I hear his pants hit the floor and the distinct ripping of a condom packet. I can feel my heart in my throat, clamping up and bursting in anticipation with each breath. The fear of getting caught is vaporized the minute he slowly enters me, fully and deeply.
“Holy fuck, so tight for me.” He groans, hands curved around my hips, gently guiding himself in and out of me.
“Oh wait!” I say quickly.
“What?” He stops.
“Kind of forgot, there’s a meeting after lunch, in about twenty minutes.”
“Geez, too bad I don’t have my equipment to fuck you with—Jesus, Liv. With you like this, all open and ready for me, practically soaking, I won’t need twenty minutes.” He laughs, and I cover my face in slight mortification. But he is right; he’s barely adjusted in me, and I am already feeling…there. What? It’s been a while. Geez.
“O-okay,” I stammer and can practically see him playfully rolling his eyes with a ghost of a smile on his lips.
He gets back in the rhythm after my stupid intrusion, taking painfully slow thrusts in and out of me. I feel myself squeeze and accommodate around his large, long length. I bite my lips and try to keep in my moans, but I can’t help it. He just feels too damn good.
“Mmm, Grey. Please go faster,” I plead quietly, gripping the edge of the desk.
“As you wish, princesa,” he mutters darkly before pounding into me roughly.
“Ah, Grey!” I moan loudly and curse myself, hoping no one heard.
He picks up speed, slamming into me harder. Filling me, grabbing my hips, groaning curses. I moan his name and allow myself to fall in step with my rapid heartbeat. I feel like I can hear his, and it makes me smile, knowing how well connected we are. I cry out his name into my palm and hiss in pain and ultimate pleasure as he grinds his fingernails in my skin, latching onto me for grip. Fire burns where he drags them down a bit then clasps on extra hard. I know there will be bruises tomorrow, but I don’t care. I’ll wear them with pride. For him only, though, of course. I want him to be proud of the way he fucks me.
Time seems to slow down and fast forward as he plows into me. I don’t even know if a minute has gone by or an hour. All I know is that I don’t want this to stop. Ever. It just feels too damn good.
“You like the way I feel, princess?” he goads, voice raspy and deep.
“Y-yes, Grey. Oh, fuck. You feel amazing,” I drawl. He reaches round and begins to play with my clit. “Ah! Oh my God, please don’t stop.” I lick my lips and feel my eyes roll in the back of my eyes. The pressure is so much, and I find myself cursing his name like it’s an actual curse. Pleasure runs deep in my stomach and makes me go blind for a second. I lift on my toes and grind my hips, trying to create more sexual friction.
“Let it g
o for me, bebé,” he instructs, thrusting harder and faster and gripping tighter, rubbing and toying with me. I feel like I am slowly slipping away from this world and crashing into his. “Come around me, princess. Let me feel you shudder as I fuck you.”
His naughty words send me overboard.
“Grey!” I begin to scream his name, but his finger dripping with my sweet juices cuts me off. I suck and swirl my tongue around his finger.
That sets him overboard.
“Holy fuck, that’s so fucking hot, babe,” he grunts, curling his finger in my mouth.
I smirk and mewl and moan his name as he releases in me. I feel him twitch a little and hum in contentment. I move my hips a little as he slowly pulls out of me. I kiss the tip of his finger and giggle as he curses deeply about me being sexy. I stand up and pull my panties up, pulling my dress down. I try my best to smooth out the wrinkles as he discards the full condom and his cold fries. The meeting is in just a few minutes, so I attempt to run my hands through my hair to make it seem like I didn’t just have amazing office sex and swipe some lip gloss over my mouth and a few flicks of mascara over my eyelashes using my phone’s camera.
“See you at home.” I blush as I wave Grey goodbye.
He salutes me with a sexy wink before the elevators close.
I giggle at his silliness, heart still racing at the fact that we just had sex in my office. Eight-year-old Liv would not be proud of that. Too bad nineteen-year-old Liv fucking loves it.
I sigh as I look in the reflection of an office, trying to tame my wild curls.
Lily walks up next to me with a knowing smile. “Hey.”
“Hey.” I smile and grip my stupid, stupid hair in frustration.
“Here.” She hands me a hair band, smirking. “It’s better if you just wear it up.”
“Thank you,” I breathe, gathering my hair up in a ponytail.
“No problem, I know how messy it can be.” She coughs into her hand, obviously trying to hide a laugh.
“What do you…?” I trail and feel myself flush as it finally hits me what she means.
“How’d you know?” I whisper. I feel embarrassed, like a sinner in church.
“The signs are subtle but still there.” She links her arm with mine and whispers as we enter the meeting room. “Details later.”
Chapter Seventeen
A few days later, I am sitting at my desk humming a random melody while working. I have a soft smile on my face as I look around briefly and spot one of my favorite photos of Grey and me on my desk. My eyes wander around the massive office and then settle on the many tall buildings of downtown. An appreciation and gratitude fill me until tears brim my eyes. All my dreams are on the brink of coming true. I have the love of my life in my corner, supporting me, an internship at a program that will skyrocket me to my career, and I am just generally happy.
My mind flashes with images of me on the couch with Grey, a few years away. No wedding band, no kids’ toys—nothing. Just us…and my heart hurts. I hold my chest, and my eyes water, but then I remind myself that, take away all those things, and I am still next to the man I believe I will always love. I may have dreamed of having a family and living in a gorgeous fenced house, but it has altered, believe it or not.
My phone buzzes, and I pick it up, curious as to who is texting me. Jaimie and Julia are in class, and Grey is out training.
Charlotte: Skype me, bitch.
A laugh slips out at her bluntness. I put my phone down and bite my lip as I pull up the application on my computer screen. I feel naughty for doing so when I should be focusing on the reports due for Garrett today, but this won’t take long. Promise. But I can’t promise she won’t talk forever and make it drag out. Can’t say I won’t stop her, though. I miss her and the girls. I’ve been too focused and caught up in school and the program to make time to chat with them. I make a mental note to do something with Jaimie and Julia, like go to the mall or movies, and talk and video chat with Charlotte often.
“Hey!” I say excitedly and wave my hand as Charlotte’s face pops up on the clear screen.
“Olive! Long time no see!” she exclaims, and I see she is crossing a busy street.
“Pay attention before you get hit.” I rub my cheeks in anxiety.
“I won’t get—oh, fuck you too, guy!” She stops and kicks the bumper of a car that beeps at her, stopping in front of her legs. She hits his car hood, and I laugh at how brutal she is, cursing at him and showing him her middle finger. “Anyway, how are you doing?” She smiles brightly, brown eyes glistening under the California sun.
I chuckle at how quick she can go from cursing out a man to smiling like she’s a saint. “I’m doing very well, actually. I got my own office, and Grey’s been really supportive.”
“Holy shit, an office? For real?” she exclaims, eyes widened as she peers into the camera.
“Yep.” I stand by the window and do a little tour of the office. She compliments everything, and I am flushed by the time I sit behind my desk again. “Enough about me, what’s been happening with you? Find a man worthy to calm your wild ways? Did Sasha like your mix? Tell me everything.”
She laughs, and I can tell she has found a guy by the redness in her cheeks. “I have found someone, but no one is enough to calm me down, okay?” She winks at me, and I laugh and gesture for her to tell me his name. “His name is Nick. And Sasha fucking loved my mix.”
By mix, she means her DJ remix. She’s at this amazing program that’s known for making successful artists. She’s had a passion for making music ever since she was ten. Actually, when I was eight and she was ten, we promised each other to go after our dreams, no matter what it took. And ten years later, look where we are: her getting more and more recognition as a DJ, and me as an intern to become a psychologist. Little us would be very proud. And freaking out, if I’m being honest. But proud more than anything.
We talk about everything, from how much I am learning, to how my friend groups at college and in the office are growing, to how well Grey and I are doing. Then we switch the conversation over to her. We chat about how she is kind of digging Nick, how they argued at first in their music class, then he apologized and bought her iced coffee, her favorite. We talked about her threatening to murder her roommate’s cat if he chewed on her rug one more time, how she’s thinking of dying parts of her hair pink. And we talk about everything in between. I laugh and blush and feel more wholesome after we get through all the topics.
“So how are you doing with a hole in your chest?” she asks, and her smile drops a little.
“It’s not a hole,” I tell her with an uneasy smile as I glance down at my chest, consciously placing a hand over it. She watches me with concern lodged in her brown eyes. I quickly pull my hand away and clear my throat before assuring her, “It’s nearly healed.”
“Thought the doctor said it’d take months before it healed,” she ponders out loud, skepticism lacing her words.
I shrug and nervously tuck hair behind my ear. “It’s on its way to healing completely, but it doesn’t hurt much.”
“Much,” she repeats. “Had any hallucinations or anything since?”
I consider lying to her, but then I realize she can clearly see my face, and she knows me well enough to know when I am lying. I sigh as it hits me that I have to tell the truth, but not the whole truth. I will not tell her about the coughing of blood or nausea; that’ll pass. I know it will.
“A few hallucinations here and there, but the doctor says it’s normal for patients suffering from PTSD,” I inform her with an easy, small smile.
She sighs restlessly and sits outside of some café. “I still can’t believe that happened to you.”
“I know.” I pick at my skirt with shaky hands. Blood-curdling screams and gunshots fill my ears. I am on the verge of falling into another flashback, but thankfully a waitress comes up to Charlotte to take her order. “I…um, I think I’m going to go back to work.”
“Hold on,” she tel
ls the waitress then gives me crazy eyes. “Um, no. Stay on. I was just ordering an iced coffee.”
“That’s okay.” I resist the urge to rub my chest but give her a grin. “I’ll call you later or tomorrow. I still have a lot of work to do. We’ve been talking for almost an hour.”
She looks at me contemplatively before rolling her eyes. “Fine, but I want to see your call or I’m flying out to check on you in person.”
“Okay, I promise. Bye.”
“Bye, Olive.”
I end the call and take a deep breath. Images of That Night flash across my mind, and my chest burns. It isn’t real, it isn’t real…I tell myself repeatedly. Feeling the familiar tightness of my chest, I grab a few tissues from the tissue box sitting on my desk and cough into it. My head feels light and my breath hollow afterwards. I whimper at the blood coating the tissue and get up and discard it in the trash.
“You’re fine, Liv. You are o-okay,” I tell myself, tears building up in my eyes. I don’t feel fine, though. I actually feel like I am getting worse. But, like I pointed out earlier, so much is coming together for me. “Do you think I’ll get the experience I am here in the program or lectures while lying in a hospital bed like I am a vegetable?”
“Olivia, Garrett would like to see…oh my God! Are you okay?” Delilah knocks on the open door.
I turn to her fully and nod, grinning like I am perfectly okay. “Yes, I am okay.”
“But there’s blood on your lip…” She trails, and I freeze, finally tasting the blood on my tongue. I dart my tongue out and taste more on the corner of my lips. I turn around and briskly walk over to my desk, snatching a tissue and wiping my mouth clean. “I can call the ambulance if this is something serious.”
“No reason.” I whirl back around on my heels, flashing her a grin. She looks off-put and confused as I walk up to her.
“Are you sure?” she asks, her blue eyes widening with concern.
“Yes.” I throw the tissue out and walk past her, my smile faltering with every step, realizing she knows my secret of whatever is going on with me. As we walk to Garrett’s office in silence, I grow more and more paranoid. What if she tells someone? Like, maybe, Matthew or Lily, knowing they are friends of mine here in the office. And what if they find a way to inform Grey about it? I can’t have that happen.
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