by Jill Cooper
I glance at Cassidy to see if that’s true. She’s already freed her baton from her hip and is holding it tightly in her hands. “It’s going to hurt.”
Hurt? I’ve experienced enough pain to last me a lifetime, but I know I can endure more. That’s the truth about life, there’s always more, but I’m ready for it.
I place Lara down on the ground delicately and fold her hands on her chest. I don’t know if it’s good-bye, but it feels like it.
Cassidy is waiting, her lips drawn together. There’s a serious pinch in her eyebrows. “We might be running short on time here.”
Nerves bubble in my stomach so I lay on the ground in a fetal position. I pull my hair off my neck so she can see the device edging out of my skull. Squeezing my eyes as tight as possible, I grit my teeth and grip my hair like a lifeline.
I’m as ready as I’m going to get.
My restraint is nudged and Cassidy starts counting. “On three…”
“Just do it.” I bark out, but I’m not ready for the electrical current that charges through the restraint device and surges through my brain. It travels through my skull and my teeth tingle. Makes my feet quiver.
But my brain is the same. Mostly. I haven’t been freed.
“Again,” I order Cassidy. “Hold it longer this time.”
“Lara…” her voice is pained with warning.
“I said again,” I grumble the words and cast her a look over my shoulder.
“You’re eyes.” Cassidy’s mouth drops open. I don’t know what’s wrong with my eyes and don’t have time to ask. She thrusts her baton again and I’m not ready for the surge of power.
I can’t breathe as the charge rockets up and down my body repeatedly. The baton is still against my device and the tingling builds to a scream. My limbs shake and all I can do is keep my eyes shut, my jaw clenched, and try to ride through it like a roller coaster.
But I can’t keep my body still as the pain intermingles with the smell of singed flesh. My head rears back even though the baton is no longer against me. My body quakes, my limbs thrash and my tongue folds back into my mouth.
I’m having a seizure.
“Lara!” Cassidy screams and falls beside me. She applies pressure to my body to hold me still. “Hang in there. Damn it, Lara!” She caresses my face and holds me close. But I can’t see her. I’m drifting away.
Bucking back and forth, I can’t keep my eyes closed. I can’t keep them open. I’m flipping back and forth.
The future.
The past.
The present.
All at once, I’m everywhere. As I’ve feared, I no longer exist in one time. I exist in all of them at once. That knowledge cripples me.
My mother grown old, mourning a daughter lost. Jax never giving up the fight to find me.
Mike lost at sea, drowning his sorrows in booze and woman at the ripe old age of eighteen.
Molly, marries and has children, but can never have the man she truly loves. Because he’s still in love with me. A ghost.
Donovan and Molly?
That truth hits me hard and I travel through time at a whirlwind speed. Through the city of Boston, I move as if I’m the wind. Super fast, super strong. Nothing stops me until I see the inside of an elevator.
A middle-aged man is crying in the corner. Whimpering and sobbing as if his life is being taken from him. Stripped away and when he looks up, I see the face and I know it.
I love it.
But he’s not alone. Xavier is there with a gun. He’s going to kill Donovan. Yet another thing he’s taken from me. One more thing he can’t just leave alone.
Not today, though.
They can’t see me yet, but now they will.
My body puts itself back together one cell at a time. To them, it appears as if I step straight out of the metal of the elevator. My hair is still intertwined with the call buttons as my face snaps into place. one strand at a time.
Xavier sees me first and his eyes go wide with fright. He lifts his gun to fire a shot off and I twist his wrist until he screams. He drops the gun and time slows down enough so I can catch it. With the butt of the gun, I bash him against the temple.
He moans and I squeeze his throat with my free hand. I shove him against the elevator wall. My lips pull together and I sneer. Daniels has taken everything from me. Now that I can see all the timelines at once, I know everything this monster has done.
It needs to end.
Time is my friend. It is my ally.
Xavier gasps for breath and tries to pry away my fingers. His lips turn blue and when he goes slack, I let him fall.
With a deep breath, I turn. Donovan is staring up at me with a wet face; he’s still crumpled in the corner of the elevator. His mouth is open and his eyes widen with disbelief.
I go down in front of him even though I know I’m needed elsewhere. I need to do something else, but I also need to give this to him. This version of Donovan needs to see me one last time before I change it all.
Doesn’t he deserve at least that?
But I don’t need to say anything. Donovan touches my face with shaking hands. “Lara? Is that really…?” He doesn’t finish his statement as he grips my hair.
Happiness rolls in on his face and he starts to sob.
My heartbreaks and I take him into my arms. I hold the crumbled man at the bottom of the elevator and stroke his back.
“I tried to keep hope that I’d see you one more time. Lara?” Donovan whispers and his lips kiss me gently. I think he’s trying to test me. See if I’m real. He’s old now. Maybe it should be creepy, but it isn’t.
Why? Because he’s still Donovan. Still, the man I love.
“I’m going to fix all this, Don.” I rest my forehead against his. “So you never have to feel this. Never have lived any of this.”
“How?” Donovan chokes on his words, but I don’t have an answer.
All that I know is I can. All I know is that I will. “Just trust me. You’ve always trusted me, even when I gave you no reason.”
“You’ve always given me a reason to, Montgomery.” He smiles wide as if he’d thought he’d never say that again. “Will I remember seeing you? Being here with you like this?”
“I hope you won’t have to. I hope you won’t remember living like this.” I stroke his hand, so much older, but still mine to hold. “But I’ll remember. I always remember.”
His eyes darken. “How can you be so strong? How?”
There’s no real answer other than I have no choice, but that seems too depressing to say. So I shrug and say. “I’m Lara Crane.”
Donovan laughs while he cries.
I cradle him close. “You didn’t even ask me where I’ve been all this time.”
“Doesn’t matter.” Donovan shakes his head. “All that matters is you’re here. You came back.”
“I’ll always come back for you,” I whisper and I tilt his head toward mine so I can kiss his forehead. “Now close your eyes.”
He does it without asking why. I give him a good-bye kiss on his cheek and then I’m gone.
Rocketing through time.
Straight into the past.
****
I flip through timelines.
Through all the questions. All the what ifs.
There’s only one answer and that answer leads me back further in time than I’ve ever been. I’m not even in Boston anymore, but back in California where my target was born and raised. Right now he’s sitting on a bench, reading a science journal.
He’s young then, a year younger than I am, and I can’t believe such an innocent looking kid turns into the monster, Xavier Daniels, but it’s he. The one that will grow to rule Rewind and the world with an iron, deadly fist. His glasses and sweater vest disarm me even as I take physical form on the grass.
The crazy thing is, what I’m about to do I’d never be able to stomach if it wasn’t for Rex and his teachings. He hardened me and taught me so much about death, doing what need
s to be done. I don’t know if that’s the lesson he meant me to take away from everything.
But it’s the only one I learned.
I’d do anything for family.
I step toward him as my hair finishes materializing and I take a seat next to him on the bench. Leaning my arm on the back of the bench, I smile at him.
Flirty, seductive. I’m ready to end it for good.
Glancing up, he starts. He stutters at me. “H—Hello.”
“Hi,” It’s simple enough of a greeting. “You know, I’ve been all over.”
“Have you?” He slips the journal closed.
I nod that I have indeed. “Yup, I’ve been through time. Scoured all the facts, all the pages of information that you’d probably find fascinating. You’d love to probe my mind. Pretty sure of it. In fact, I know you would because you have and if I don’t change things, you will again.”
He scowls but leans his arm back on the bench and shifts to face me. Xavier probably thinks I’m fascinating. Probably even thinking I’m flirting.
Time to slide into home.
“You know what I’ve found? Of all the timelines. Of all the alternate versions of what you’re doing right now, no one will ever miss you.”
Xavier’s face falls and I let my words sink in. I let them hurt him.
“You do nothing, ever, that endears you to another human being. You’re washed up, a loser, evil. That’s never going to change. Never does. And it never will because now I can get rid of you.”
I take a deep breath. “No one will ever miss you.”
His mouth opens, and then it closes as if he changed his mind. When he starts to get up from the bench, presumably to get away from the crazy wacko sputtering beside him, I touch his forehead and he freezes in place.
Not frozen, but in pain. He can’t move. Only his eyes widen and they glance at me. His mouth turns down, and he moans a scream. The only one he can.
Before he vanishes with a surge of golden light.
Gone. But not just gone here. Gone everywhere. Ripped from the timeline, the multiple timelines, as if he was never born in the first place.
An older woman rushes toward me. She’s in a long skirt and a loose shirt. Her face is lined with the horror only a mother could wear. “What did you do to my son? Police! Help!”
And then with a flash of blue lightning and wind, I’m gone.
19: Lara Crane
Time is a strange bedfellow when you control it. When you decide, where you want to be and how long you want to be there, but I choose life.
I choose to be normal and to walk through time like any other person. It’s a conscious decision and one I hope I can maintain. One I hope won’t betray me in my dreams.
I’m wake by someone tickling my nose. Scrunching it up, I roll over and bury my head under the pillow.
“Come on, sleepy head.” Mom laughs and rubs my back. “Today’s the big day.”
Big day? I lift the pillow from my head and peer at her with squinted eyes. She’s all done up in a dress, with her hair up in a twist. “I’ll be up in a minute, Mom.”
“Good.” She kisses the top of my head and messes with my long curls. “Hurry up and get dressed. Donovan, your dad, well they’re expecting to meet us there.”
There? “Sorry. I feel like I haven’t slept in years.” I can’t help a smirk.
Mom puts her hands on her hips. “Are you trying to tell me something, Lara Montgomery?”
“No.” I swing my legs off the edge of the mattress. That’s when I realized I’m not in my room. I’m in a hotel room. I rush to the window and pull back the curtains on a beautiful day.
A beautiful day in DC.
“Mom,” I can’t keep the fear out of my voice, “what are we doing in DC?”
She comes behind me and runs her hands down my arms. “Today’s the day. The day you’ve been working so hard for.” Mom strokes my hair, but it doesn’t make me feel better. I realize I’ve been holding my breath. “They’re swearing in the new time travel commissioner.”
Time travel commissioner? My face twists up in confusion. “What about Rewind?”
Mom laughs and covers her mouth. “Don’t be such a kidder, Lara. You know Rewind was shut down months ago.”
But the senate hearings? She ushers me into the bathroom to freshen up and it’s then I’m finally able to reach back into the time and pull out the needed information. She’s right, Rewind was shut down, and today the government is swearing in a new time travel commissioner to make sure time is never messed with again.
And it’s someone I can’t even begin to imagine. Someone who has been off my radar for the last year.
I almost forgot about her. Almost.
Except she’s the one that got me out of the cage.
****
We gather in the conference hall and everyone is there.
The press and photographers are there, but I’m more interested in those that I love.
Molly and Mike are here in their finest clothes. Mike plays with his ninja turtles and Molly is busy balancing on one foot. I wonder what she’ll be like as she grows up. I know for sure she has a great granddaughter in her future, but can she find love? Like I have?
Jax is there and stands close to Mom, but so does my dad, the amazing John Crane. They’re both amazing. I love them both. I don’t know anymore whom I could be without; I want both of them in my life.
Dad puts his arm around my shoulders and squeezes me in. “Big day. I’m proud of you, Lara. You’ve worked so hard for this.”
“We all have.” My eyes scan the crowd and then I see him coming toward me.
Donovan.
My heart pounds and jumps a few beats. I tear away from Dad and head straight for him. When he sees me, Donovan speeds up until we’re standing right in front of each other. He takes my hands and we squeeze each other’s fingers.
“Sleep well?” Donovan asks.
“Yeah. Comfortable. How about you?”
“Sure.” Donovan gives me a grin. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Like what?” My eyes are wide and innocent.
“Like you haven’t seen me in a week. Like we weren’t just together last night on the plane.”
“I guess I just love you is all.”
“That’s all, huh?” Donovan shakes his head and leans in closer. Our lips meet only briefly because someone is clearing their throat and I realize Dad is standing right beside us.
“Dad,” I blink my eyes.
“Oh, John.” Mom shakes her head.
“What?” Dad puts his arm around Mom’s shoulders. “Can’t a dad be concerned about his daughter’s….social life?”
Mom laughs and I stare at them in shock. Her nose is scrunched up and, well, adorable. I think my parents might be getting back together and it’s clear from the look on Jax’s face that he thinks so too.
“I should go,” Jax says and my heart is torn in two.
“Absolutely not.” Mom says sternly. “You’ve worked for this too. Maybe more than anyone here. You deserve this moment too, Jax.”
She reaches for him.
And Jax takes her hand.
Donovan puts his arm around my waist as the room draws to a silence. I watch with bated breath as Marcus O’Reily steps up. When he sees me, he motions to me. “Lara Montgomery, ladies and gentlemen.”
There’s light applause as I step away from Donovan. I’m uncertain as I get to the stage and Marcus offers me his hand. I grip it lightly and he leans in to kiss my cheek. “Don’t be shy. This is your day just as much as mine.”
I take a deep breath and stand rigidly as she steps out on the stage. Delilah Smith, her red hair done up in a twist. She stands in front of Marcus and raises her hand, ready to take her oath. But first, she smiles at me and winks.
And I smile back.
My mom’s assistant. Once, she’d tried to help Mom escape town before Mom was murdered. Then she’d stood by Mom and her time travel experiments,
despite her misgivings. Later, she helped a scared, lonely girl find a way to escape a cage. Delilah was always a good person.
The right person.
I just didn’t realize it, all this time, I just didn’t know.
Once her oath is taken, she turns to the crowd and speaks calmly into a microphone. “Time travel is dangerous; it’s our generations Pandora’s box. We can’t un-ring that bell, ladies, and gentlemen, but we can make sure that no one profits from it. No one tries to tamper with it, and that no government agency tries to use it to their advantage. No experiments. No unlawful technology. Rewind is dead and buried and will not be resurrected under a new name, under any circumstances.”
Giving way to allow the applause, Delilah pauses. “The commission will give birth to a new era of anti-time travel. Where it will be outlawed, monitored, and never used again. This timeline cannot be skewed again.” Her eyes meet mine. “We’ll make sure of it.”
With the speech done, Marcus and I congratulate her. Delilah shakes my hand warmly, pressing her skin against mine. “I wouldn’t be able to do any of this, Lara, without your support. Now it’s your turn, to go do the things kids your age do.”
Sounds nice to me.
****
There’s a big dinner that lasts hours.
A celebration that’s happy and hopeful for the future.
By the end of it, I’m exhausted as I walk through the fancy banquet hall, looking for my boyfriend. Finally, I find him on the terrace, overlooking DC. His blazer is unbuttoned and his tie is loose around his neck. Handsome, sexy. He’s growing into a fine man and it makes me shiver. “Hey there, stranger.” I close the door behind me as I step outside.
Donovan’s leaning on the railing and when he sees me, he straightens up. “If it isn’t the girl of the hour.” He slips his hands onto my hips and pulls me close.
“Oh please, that’s Delilah.”
“And she was your pick. It was your idea.”
I can’t hide the surprise on my face. I hadn’t picked that fact out yet.
He doesn’t miss a thing. His nose scrunches and he scowls at me. “What aren’t you telling me, Montgomery? What’d you do this time?”
