by T. L. Tate
“I don’t know. A few weeks ago things got too serious, too quickly. So I ended it.” She looked straight at me.
For some reason, I was upset. “Did you tell him that?” I should’ve been happy that she had finally released me from her grasp. So then what was this feeling of wanting that I had?
She shook her head. “I haven’t been able to find the right words.”
“So you’re not going to say anything? You’re just going to leave him dangling in the wind?” I could hear the anger in my voice and when Jen looked at me, I could tell that the others could hear it too.
“What’s the big deal, Lance? It’s her relationship. If she wants to end it then she can do that.”
“You’re right, sweetheart. I’m sorry Jessa.”
“No. It’s fine. He’s right. I’ll let him know the first chance that I get.”
Jen relaxed into the couch. “Well, that’s settled but I’d still like to know what your plans are. If there is anything that Lance or I can do please let us know.”
“No. It’s okay. Not every dream is meant to come true.” After walking over to Jen and Alexia, Jessa kissed the baby’s forehead and then headed into the kitchen. She looked sad but resolute. I could tell that she had just given up.
Now that Jessa was gone, Jen sighed. She lifted Alexia in the air and then brought her down close and reached for me. I walked towards her. Even whispering, I could hear the desperation in her voice. “Lance! We have to help her.”
“I know that you want to babe, but there’s nothing that we can do. She’ll just have to come to terms with it.”
“No. No. No! That’s not good enough.” Alexia burped and Jen wiped her mouth clean. Holding our daughter in the air, Jen’s eyes glistened with tears.
Jessa came back in with a bottle of water for each of us.
Looking only at Alexia, Jen cried, “It’s not fair. I see you with our kids and I just know that you’d make such an awesome mom. It’s not fair that I get to have this and you don’t. It’s not fair.”
“Life’s not fair Jen. If it was then we would’ve had better parents.”
“I know. It’s just that…” A strong ray of light came through the window, causing Jen to flinch. When her eyes opened, there was this almost manic look in her eyes. “Oh my God! Oh my God!” Her brown eyes flashed between Jessa and I. She looked downright crazy. The next words that came out of her mouth made me seriously doubt her sanity. “What if it was Lance?”
“Wait? Lance what now?” Jessa was just as confused as I was.
Jen handed Alexia to me as she stood up. Grabbing Jessa’s hands and kneeling between her legs, Jen exclaimed, “Lance! Lance could be the donor. Lance could do it!”
We both yelled, “What?”
Jessa said, “No. Nuh uh! No way.”
I said, “Not going to happen. Are you crazy?”
Jen didn’t heed either of us. Instead, she began to pace. “Just think about it you guys. Jessa, you know Lance. You know that he’s smart, fun, handsome and a great dad. Lance, you know Jessa. You know that she’d make a great mom and she really really wants this! It would be perfect.”
Now I was standing. “Babe? Babe? You know this sounds ridiculous right? You want me to donate my sperm…to you sister?”
Now Jessa was standing. “Yeah. I’m with him. Don’t you think that it would be weird? I would be having a baby…by your husband!”
I could see the wheels turning in Jen’s eyes. She had already worked it all out and nothing I could say was going to stop this car from pushing forward. “It would be perfect. Think about it. I’m not getting pregnant again. I mean it. I’m done. Jessa you would get to have a kid and Lance would get to see another one of his beautiful babies born. Besides it’s not like you guys would be doing it. Its just insemination. I don’t mind it if it’s you Jessa. Besides, I think this will work out well considering you used to…umm never mind. But you know what I was going to say. Anyway, think about it. I’m fine with it if you are. Honestly. This isn’t some messed up postpartum brain nonsense. I honestly don’t see the downside. All he has to do is go shoot his load into some plastic cups and he’s obligation is finished. I can live with that if you can.”
I looked at Jessa and the look on her face was indescribable. I could see her quickly coming around to Jen’s way of thinking. It seemed like the only logical brains still at work in this space was Alexia’s and mine.
“No.” My solitary voice was the only sound in the room. When I spoke they both looked at me in shock. It was as if they forgot that I was even there or that I even got a vote. “No. I’m not doing it. I refuse.”
Jessa looked both shocked and hurt but she didn’t argue. Instead, she nodded and fell into the chair. “It’s okay. I understand.” I suspected she did. She had manipulated me into breaking my vows and betraying my wife. Now she’s in a bind and she wants me to come to the rescue like some ignorant hero. I wasn’t going to do it. I wasn’t going be what she wanted.
“Please.” Jen’s voice cracked as she fell to her knees, begging. “Please, Lance. Please, baby. Please. Please do this for her. I’m begging you. Please!”
Jen’s never acted this way. I wasn’t sure what was going on in that head of hers but she was deadly serious about this. Honestly, I was beginning to wonder what lengths she would go to just to get what she wanted. Maybe I would come home to see a sample collection kit at the side of our bed.
“Jen.”
“No, Lance. You have to. You absolutely have to. Please. She’s too proud to ask you. I know it and you know it. But I’m not. I’m telling you that I’m okay with this and I know it’s asking a lot. But please do this.”
“Jen. Think about it. What happens if she does get pregnant, huh? How are we going to explain that to the kids or to my parents? How could I ever have a child and not be in that child’s life? I couldn’t do it. Not for all the begging or money in the world.”
Jessa finally spoke. “What makes you think I would keep the child away from you?” There wasn’t an accusation in her voice. Her tone was light and questioning.
“I just assumed. It would be pretty hard to explain don’t you think?”
“I don’t care about that. If you did this for me, I would be happy to have you in our child’s life. I could think of nothing better actually. Jen’s right. I want this. I want this more than you could possibly know. So please.” She got down on her knees next to Jen. “Please, say yes. Say that you’ll do this.”
With these two beautiful women on their knees begging me, I didn’t have very much wiggle room. “Jen, are you sure you’re okay with this? He or she will be my child and I would treat it as such.”
Jen nodded without a moment’s hesitation. “Yes. I’m totally fine with that.”
I knew that I was beaten. I tilted my head back and held Alexia closer. Why was this happening? Things were only getting more and more complicated. I sighed, “Fine. I’ll do it.” And just like that, I sold my soul with both eyes open.
Jessa didn’t waste any time with setting up consultations and scheduling appointments. She even set up appointments for me to go in and give a sample. I’m not going to lie. It was extremely uncomfortable. I mean, it wasn’t like there was someone standing at the front desk with a nudie magazine and a bottle of lube but I felt like everyone, even the janitor, knew what I was coming there to do. So I did my business with little relish and left as quickly as I could. I called later to check my numbers and they were all normal to outstanding. It looked like I was going to be a good donor for Jessa.
To be honest, I thought that Jen would change her mind in a day or so. So I went along with it. But a couple of weeks went by and the only thing that changed is that I would walk in on a bunch of disturbing conversations about ovulation days and hormone shots. Jen was Team Jessa-Get’s-A-Baby. As a matter of fact, she was the damn captain of the team. She went to Jessa’s appointments with her and would tell me what was going on and what the doctor had said. Jess
a would come by to have dinner with us and that was all that the two of them would talk about. So between the three kids, work, and donor-hood, I didn’t have much of a life.
Since then it’s been almost 2-months and Jessa has finally scheduled insemination for this coming Friday, which meant I had to go in and give my sample in the morning. I took time off of work because I promised Jen I would be there during the insemination. Of course, she made me promise not to look at Jessa’s lady parts. I agreed. The night before the appointment, Jen and the kids all went to my parents’ for the weekend. My parents had won some tickets at church and would be taking the kids to see some ice-skating show. Jen missed them and wanted to spend the weekend with them.
So Friday morning I awoke to an empty house and set towards getting my day started. I was just putting on my shirt after having taken a shower when I heard the doorbell. I opened the door and there stood Aphrodite. Jessa was standing at the door holding two cups of coffee. Her long blonde hair was straightened and had lowlights throughout. Her green eyes were gleaming in the morning sunlight. She wore an emerald green 1-shoulder dress that stopped just south of her business. She looked damn near edible. I assumed she showed up so that she could go to the appointment with me or to wish well on my trip. However, standing there looking at her, I could easily imagine that she was going out to some trendy club.
I had to pick my jaw up off the ground. “Umm, h-hey Jessa. What’s up?”
Her voice was like smoke wafting through a sugary tunnel. “Good morning, Lance. Can I come in?”
I stepped aside and she sauntered in. It was a little chilly out for the dress that she wore but I didn’t care. She was wearing the hell out of that dress and I couldn’t help but be mesmerized by her.
She handed me a coffee and I thanked her. Placing the cup to my lips, I took one final long look at her before taking an equally long draught of my coffee. Sure, she was beautiful. No one could deny that. But there was something different about her today. It was like there was sex in the air and it was all oozing from her. My mind was muddled and I was putty in her hands.
“So what brings you over this morning?”
Her smile told me all that I wanted to know. “Well you know. Jen’s gone. The kids are gone. I just sort of thought we could continue where we left off a few months ago.”
“You mean the roleplaying thing?”
Nodding, she placed her hand on my chest as I watched her small tongue dance over her lips. “Yes. The roleplaying thing.”
It was only a moment but I saw my chance and I went for it. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
She wasn’t deterred. “Why’s that?”
“Well, the doctor said that I shouldn’t masturbate or have sex for 24-48 hours before giving my sample. I have an appointment in an hour. We can’t have sex.”
She laughed quietly and it sounded insanely erotic. “Oh. That. You don’t have to worry about that. I thought we would try something a little different this time around.”
“Different? Like what?”
“Well, you know the hormones I was given? Well, I’ve taken those and my trigger shot. Basically, today is the best chance I’ll have at getting pregnant and I don’t want to do it in some lab.” She stalked towards me and I could feel myself shaking in excitement. “Besides, that little drink that you just took has enough drugs in it to make you more potent then you have ever been in your life. Today is the day that you get me pregnant for real and I want it to be you. I want to feel it when you slam your seed into me. I want you to hold me while you give me your child. I want it to be just you and me in a room where no one can reach us.”
Her words rang in my ears. Drugs? Triggers? Potent? It all seemed too surreal. “B-but the appointment.”
“Don’t worry about the appointment. I canceled it a couple of days ago. Today it’s just you and me…Husband.”
She backed me into a wall. “I don’t…I mean…I thought you said it was over.”
I could feel her breasts against my chest and I could feel that she wasn’t wearing a bra. Her nipples slid against my chest, igniting a fire down below. “I did say that and at the time, I meant it. I wasn’t going to force you into having sex with me.”
“And now?”
Her green eyes were hypnotizing. “Now? Well, now I technically won’t force you. Nevertheless, that drink that you took should be having an effect on you in a moment. To be honest, I don’t think you’ll be able to resist. So what do you say? One more time as husband and wife?” Her lips were on my neck as I felt this fiery sensation coursing through my veins.
I sat the coffee on the ledge behind me and grabbed her shoulders. “No.”
She looked shocked. “No?”
I shook my head. “I don’t want to play a game with you. If we’re going to do this it’s going to be you and me. Jessa and Lance. No roleplaying. No fake backstories. None of it. It has to be 100% Jessa or I won’t do it.”
“100% me? I don’t know if I can do that.” In that moment, she wasn’t a predator. She was a person trying to decide just how vulnerable she was willing to be.
I decided to help her out. “You can do it, Jessa. I’ll be right there the whole time. Don’t be afraid. Just be who you really want to be.”
“Who I really want to be?” There were a thousand questions dancing in her eyes along with a thousand doubts. “Who I really want to be? I can’t. I can’t do that. What if…what if you push me away? I can’t take that.”
“Jessa. Just be you. That’s all I’m asking. Can you do that? Can you just be your honest self while we’re together?”
There was a flash of vulnerability in her eyes as she averted her glance. “Promise me that you won’t push me away?”
“I promise.”
“You swear?”
“I swear.”
“O-okay. I’ll try.” She closed her eyes and took several breaths, when she opened them I almost fainted. She looked at me with so much affection and unabashed devotion that I felt like I was standing on the edge of a giant stage in front of a million screaming fans. I knew then that her story was the truth. She had developed more than a schoolgirl crush. She was in love with me.
“Oh Jessa.” The air came out of me in a soft sob. I could feel it again. The years of anguish and regret, which she nursed all alone. I felt my heart tear open.
“Lance, I love you. I’ve loved you forever and I’ll always love you. What would make me the happiest woman in the world would be if you would give me a child. I want your child in me. I want to raise a child with your smile and your face. I want that child to have your name. Please, Lance. Please do this for me.”
We were in a complicated and duplicitous relationship. Still, it was too late for me to pretend like I didn’t know what I knew, or that I didn’t feel what I felt. I kissed her softly. “Of course. I will give you want you desire.”
Smiling like a girl in love, she took my hand and led me to the stairs. Her long legs stretched for miles as they flexed and folded on her way up the stairs. I was so turned on by the sight of her that I nearly took her right then and there.
Once we were at the top of the stairs I thought she would lead me into the guest bedroom, but she didn’t. She walked straight into my bedroom and I followed right behind her.
“I want to do it here.”
“Why here?”
She spun in a circle, “I don’t know. It’s just that when I think about you giving me a child, it’s always been in your bed. I guess I’m a stickler for details.”
In for a penny. In for a pound. “Okay.”
She sat on the edge of the bed and spread her legs. All that she had on were a pair of pumps and that green dress. I could clearly see her slit as she began playing with her button. “Come here and taste me, Lance.”
As she ordered, I walked over to her. “You look beautiful. I just want you to know that.”
She smiled sweetly. “Thank you. I appreciate that. Now…on your knees.”
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br /> I sighed pleasantly. I didn’t mind her orders now that she wasn’t threatening me. The hair on her mound had grown in a bit beyond the previous landing strip but it was still manicured as it made the cutest little triangle. Placing my hand on her chest, I pushed her back. She fell back slowly and I could feel her eyes on me the entire way down.
Her pretty pussy was right in front of me so I decided to dig in but first she needed to be teased just a bit. There was a small mound of hair right at the top of her slit and sitting elegantly above her clit. I put those strands in my mouth and tugged just enough to hear her gasp.
“Oh my!” She grabbed my head and pushed it down until my mouth was wrapped around her pussy lips.
I tilted my head slightly, like you would do if you were kissing someone. I kissed her wet pussy longingly, slowly and deeply. She grinded on my face as I did. That was the catalyst. Tasting her pussy ignited the drugs in my system and my body went into overdrive. I thought that I would tear a hole in my pants if I didn’t get them off.
I was mad with desire for her and nothing short of a deep drilling would get me to calm down. She saw this and winked.
“Sorry. Maybe giving you that drug was a bit of a mistake.”
I stood up and ripped my shirt and pants off. “You think? I hope you’re ready to take responsibility.”
She nodded, “Yeah. I’m ready.”
As my hands went to my waistband, hers went to the hem of her dress. By the time I had my underwear at my ankles, her dress was above her head and on the floor. She moved back on the bed and I stalked towards her. I was hungry for her body and she looked like perfectly ripe fruit. I was going to devour her.
She spread her legs to invite me in. I was between her legs and was ready to invade when she reached out for me.
“Please, kiss me. Please, see only me. Only me.”
In another moment or two, I would’ve been too engrossed in pleasure to understand the depth of those words.
I willed myself to calm down as I kissed her sweetly. “I’m only thinking about you, Jessa. Only you.”
“I love you, Lance.” It wasn’t a question. And it wasn’t something she said expecting a response. Nevertheless, I gave her one.
