by Harlow Stone
Only then do I allow the darkness to take me.
Chapter One
Ryder—two days ago
Becker once again holds the phone out in front of me, and it takes all Denny and Ivan have to hold me back. She has more blood on her beautiful face. There’s a large hand wrapped around her hair to hold her head up, and her fucking shirt is torn.
Hang on beautiful! Don’t let go, just hang the fuck on!
“Noon tomorrow, Mr. Callaghan. If you’re not there, I can assure you that you will regret it.”
I leap forward, hoping to strangle the smug son of a bitch but Denny grabs me by my arm. I barely get another step forward before the car is speeding off down the street, with the only contact between me and the only woman I have ever given two fucks about.
I pull from Denny’s grasp, putting my head in my hands and pulling on my hair.
“Jesus, fuck! Fuck! Ivan? Where the fuck is Ivan? Get Patrov on the phone. Get her out of that fucking place…”
Strong hands clamp down on my shoulders, half pulling me back up.
“Petrov is on his way, he is calling in a few favors as we speak. Let’s take it inside, boss.”
Annoyed, yet thankful for Denny’s level headedness, I do as I am told for the first fucking time in my life and storm toward Jimmy’s shop. He’s oddly silent, but won’t stay still. This has to be hurting him as much as it is hurting me.
What the fuck was I thinking? How the fuck did I bring such a beautiful fucking woman into this mess?
What the fuck am I going to do?
Denny shoves a phone into my face, and I note the name before I put it to my ear.
“Andrei, if anything else happens to my woman, there won’t be a goddamn thing anyone can do to stop me. So help me fucking god, if I see one more drop of blood run down Elle’s face…”
“Ryder, listen! I have two contacts in the facility. Unfortunately neither of them have been assigned to the block that Ja—Elle’s being held. I have contacted them both and they are going to look into it for me, immediately. If something more happens to her I can guarantee you that I will have the person who’s responsible killed myself. That is a promise. Now, sit tight for ten fucking minutes and we’ll talk about this face to face.”
I hang up the phone on the thickly accented Russian man and toss is back to Denny.
I want nothing more than to beat the living fuck out of someone, but I sense the tension coming off of Jimmy and begin to worry who he feels like beating on. We’re men, it’s what we do. Beat on shit and take out our frustration most of the time not giving two fucks who it was who got the beating, so long as we feel better afterward.
I take the twenty steps across the shop toward him. I open my mouth to let him know what’s going on, but don’t get a word out before his fist slams me in the jaw with enough force to cause me to stumble back into the table.
I don’t move to hit him back, but fuck do I want to. I regain my footing and he wastes no time pointing his finger in my face to let me know exactly how he feels.
“You son of a bitch! You better be ready for this!”
I don’t know what he’s referring to but he clears it up for me.
“You want to know who fucking held her when her family died? I DID! You want to know who forced her to fucking eat and then spiked her wine with sleeping pills so she could fucking sleep? I DID! I watched my best friend fall the fuck apart and stare out a goddamn window like a crazy person for months!
“Laura had to force her into the goddamn shower while I crushed Jay’s pills. Not once, but twice, because life couldn’t just hand her one shit hand by stealing her fucking family. NO! It had to hand another one to the best fucking woman I know when she was beat and fucking tortured to near death a second time! So I stood, in her fucking kitchen, preparing her nightly cocktail to make sure that the only good woman left in my life got to fucking sleep!
“I did everything short of wiping her ass, Callaghan! All because she was falling apart. She wouldn’t ask for help, she wouldn’t talk. She wouldn’t do a goddamn thing! She just fucking sat there, useless. Ignorant to everything that was going on around her.
“I’m not an idiot and I understand that this shit going on right now is out of our control. But I’ll tell you right now Ryder, I finally got a small glimpse of the woman she used to be when she came back here. She’s hard, she’s rough, but she is still and will always be the most beautiful fucking woman in my life.
“That said, if she breaks this time? It’s on you. I am telling you right now that if you can’t handle that, if you can’t handle a mute who is going to ignore you, shut you out and almost forget you, then walk away now. Leave, and don’t fucking come back. I’ve lost her twice. I will do it again until the day I die because she is the only family I have and I love her to death. But don’t give her anymore hope. Because if you can’t handle it, the way she is going to be when she gets out—I will kill you. I am telling you now, she will break even more if you can’t put up with it. That’s assuming she makes it out of this fucked up mess alive and half-sane.”
I wipe the blood from my mouth, ignoring the burn in my jaw. Jimmy is not as big as I am, but he packs one hell of a punch. He also cares about my stubborn woman more than I care to let on.
Am I happy she’s had him in her life? Absolutely. Everybody needs someone who cares for them. But I will make it my fucking mission to let him and her know that she’s my responsibility.
She’s mine to look after.
She’s mine to hold at night, to keep her nightmares away.
She’s just fucking mine.
“Hit me again Jimmy, Hit me as many times as you want. I deserve it, I know I do. I should’ve done better to keep this shit from touching her but trust me when I say that I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving because I…”
I take a deep breath, closing my eyes for a moment.
We’re both silent until he breaks it.
“You love her,” he says. Not as a question, but as a statement.
I look into the eyes of my life’s best friend, and simply nod my head. I haven’t said it out loud, but that’s for her, not him.
I love her.
Jimmy seems satisfied with my non-verbal answer, because he extends his hand. I grasp it firmly to shake, acknowledging our silent agreement.
Elle is mine.
I will look after her; I will never leave her. No matter what happens, I will stand by that woman’s side and make sure she comes out of this intact. She means that much to me. She means everything to me. I was just too fucking dumb to admit or do something about it.
No more.
Never again.
She’ll know and I’ll remind her every fucking day.
“Boss, Petrov is here.”
I let go of Jimmy’s hand, and greet a surprisingly irate Andrei Petrov as he enters Jimmy’s shop.
“Not my fucking idea of Friday night, gentlemen. Sit down, let’s go over what we know, and what we can do.”
I don’t for one second disrespect a man like Andrei Petrov. Me and my team are some badass motherfuckers, and I lost it with him earlier—most likely will again. But that doesn’t mean my attitude didn’t come from a good place. I know he knows that so I don’t bother apologizing.
I never agreed with a few of the men he got off on murder charges in the past. Hell, some of them I would kill myself before setting them free on the streets. But right now? I need him.
I hate to admit that my hands are tied.
If this happened back home? I’d be golden. I know enough people in law enforcement and the court system to be able to keep my woman out of this mess. In Canada? I have no fucking pull other than a few men I happened to meet while I served overseas.
Reluctantly, I take my seat at the table Jimmy has set up in the shop. He obviously uses it to sit and make sketches, go over plans with clients, etc. It’s a huge, dark oak number, classically aged with cigarette burn marks and faded rings from drink
s.
I motion to his pack on the table and he pushes it my way. I light one up before I toss it back to him. I relish in the burn as it makes its way into my once healthy lungs. On my exhale I note all eyes on me. Everyone is waiting for me to lock my shit down before they begin.
I look to Jimmy, giving him the respect he deserves. He is as much a part of this as I am. I hate to admit it, but maybe more so. He’s been with Elle longer than I have. I may have been the one to get Elle into this mess, but it has been him and her friend Laura who got her out of it before, and brought her back to life. I made a silent vow when I shook hands with Jimmy, and I won’t let him down. I will stand by that woman from now until the day I die, making sure she has everything she needs and anything she might want.
Jimmy nods back to me, thankful for the support and appreciation. I nod toward Petrov who wastes no time getting to the point.
“One of my contacts at the prison got back to me. She is being held in Block-D, which is not where my contact is located but she assures me she was in her cell for check-in almost an hour ago. I have a list of the guards on duty tonight, and I am certain I know which one is responsible for what happened.
“His name is Derek Stratus; and this would not be the first complaint. Something you have to remember is the prison sees a lot of women who are not like our Jayne, or Elle.”
Andrei actually shoots me a sympathetic expression before he continues.
“This place has everything from women who have molested children, to killers. They also have your run of the mill drug dealers and junkies. It’s unfortunate this is where she is, but it was the closest facility to the courthouse.
“All of that aside, Stratus has a bad rap but he gets away with it because the type of women who usually make complaints against him are not reputable. My contacts have told me so and I have heard it through other sources. My contact is currently trying to track her down, but I got a text when I arrived that reads she is not in her cell on D-Block.”
I slam my fist against the table, at the same moment Jimmy shoots out of his chair and let’s loose a string of profanity.
“What the fuck do we do, Petrov? Because I am telling you right now that I am this fucking close to burning down the home of the goddamn judge who sent her there in the first place!”
He makes a motion of surrender with his hands before continuing.
“I will be the first to issue a hit on the sick fuck who is doing this, I promise you. Right now I need you to wait like I am for my contact to get back to me. We can’t break down the prison to find her, and we can do nothing until court resumes on Tuesday other than use my contacts on the inside. Please, trust me when I say that they will not let me down.”
I run my hands down my face and through my hair, knowing by the look on Petrov’s face that he is absolutely serious. There are few people in this world who would not do their damndest to make sure they got him the answers he wanted, and fast. But that doesn’t negate the fact I have a hard time putting my trust into people who I don’t know. It also doesn’t mean it’s not frustrating as fuck sitting here waiting. I just want answers! I don’t want to wait, and as much as I know Petrov will do what he can to help, I need to know how far that help will go. So I ask him.
“Petrov, you know I’m grateful that you’re here, but fucking forgive me if I can’t take someone’s word right now. My goddamn woman is being beaten and possibly raped at the moment, and you ask me to just sit with my fucking thumb up my ass and put my trust in someone I’ve never met? Give me something more Andrei, I don’t care what it costs just fucking give me something!”
Andrei Petrov, smug fucker that he is, replies with a smirk and a sense of pride on his face. “Do you remember Gerald D. Cordova? He was once held at the same prison that Elle is at now—in the men’s wing, of course.”
I take stock of the information in my head, the name sounds familiar but it doesn’t ring any immediate bells. Denny clears up my confusion, clearing his throat before he speaks, staring at the wall.
“Long-time child molester, rapist, and killer. Originally from Toronto, but was a repeat offender in the United States and across Canada.”
I see the hurt in my friend’s eyes, understanding his sensitivity on the subject after what he went through with Grace. Petrov’s Russian accent pulls me from my thoughts.
“Ah, yes. I believe you read that he escaped transport, only for his decomposed body to be found a few years later in the river. What you did not hear, however, is how my contacts allowed him to be taken from the transport so that one of the victim’s fathers could torture him for twenty-four hours. Usually I take money for these types of transactions, however sometimes I feel the need to be philanthropic and take pleasure in doing it for free.”
I stare at the man who is defending my woman, having nothing but respect for him after what he just told me. Some might call me a sadist but inflicting pain is something I was good at when it came to interrogation, and I take pleasure when I know the fucker on the other side of my torture thoroughly fucking deserved it.
I know a bit about some of the men he has defended in the past. I also know about the men they have killed. People in the media don’t hold a candle for Petrov, but I know for a fact the men who were killed on behalf of some of his clients deserved what they got. I also know the men did other shit that warranted keeping them there.
Petrov is not a bad guy, per se. He’s the kind of man you want on your good side when shit goes south and you need to step slightly outside the lines of the law in order to get justice.
“The sick fuck deserved what he got Andrei, but I just need to know that Elle is okay.”
Like a prayer answered, Andrei’s phone rings. I jump from my chair, prepared to stand beside him and listen in to the conversation if I need to. I don’t care how much it makes me look like a fucking pussy—I need to know that she’s alright.
“Speaker,” Ivan says.
Andrei nods and answers his phone, placing it on the table.
“Marnie, how’s my client?”
A woman, who I am assuming either works a desk or as a guard, answers Andrei.
“I only have a few seconds. She’s a mess, she’s unconscious and they’re sending her to the infirmary.”
I grab an empty beer bottle from the table and throw it against the nearest wall. At the same time, Jimmy knocks over another chair and starts pacing around the table looking for something to punch.
“Marnie, I need details, please.”
I hear some shuffling on the other end of the line. Obviously Marnie is trying to find a more discreet spot to talk on the phone.
“Jesus Andrei, I’m going to lose my fuckin’ job. Listen, the woman is fine. She’s beat up, but she’s okay. If I were her I would have passed the fuck out too. She’s going to have some bumps and bruises—and shit—she might even need therapy. But let me tell you; never in my fifteen years of workin’ here have I seen anything like it. That is one tough bitch you got, Andrei.”
Andrei moves to speak into the phone but I cut him off, needing to know more.
“Tell me. That’s my woman! Just fucking tell me what happened. Please!”
“Andrei, you know I don’t like speaking to anyone but you, if I lose my job you bet your ass you’re paying for my retirement!” she says in an angry voice. Andrei gives me a scolding look before placating Marnie.
“Marnie, he’s not a civilian. Think of someone like Rambo, or G.I Joe. Trust me, he is okay. Now tell us please.” His sarcastic tone obviously reassures her, because she presses on.
“Jesus, listen; I know who that woman is, read the story about her in the papers. Like I said, one tough bitch. The girl not only got him down, but he’ll be lucky if he ever gets his dick up again. I told you—never seen anything like it!”
Andrei lets out an annoyed huff. “Like what Marnie, details!”
Her raised voice comes through the speaker. “His pants were around his ankles and there was more blood t
han when I gave birth to my first child. She tried to bite his fuckin’ dick off, Andrei! And if she bit down another hair’s width I’m sure she would have succeeded! Prick would be lucky if he gets it up again!”
I don’t miss the small look of satisfaction on all the men’s faces. Denny, Jimmy Ivan and Andrei. I miss the same look because I’m fuming that some sick fuck tried to violate my woman and shoved his cock into her sweet mouth.
That’s my mouth.
Marnie presses on while I reach in my pocket for my phone, preparing to call my contact at The Tribune in Chicago. Becker’s games are over. Fuck him and Foley. This shit ends now.
