“I know, but it’s the reality of your job, isn’t it? I’m not sure I can do this, Ethan.”
Sam raised her head at that moment and looked directly at Ethan, her silent message clear. Fix this problem, you need her. How a dog could tell what he did and didn’t need was beyond Ethan’s understanding, but he wasn’t going to ignore the silent edict. They were a team, he and Sam; he trusted his life with her and vice versa. Reaching out, he scratched her between the ears, her favorite spot. A soft sigh rippled out of the dog.
“Izzy, look at me.” He waited until she turned to face him. The light had dulled in her eyes. He wanted to kiss her so badly. Kiss her until the fear and sadness was replaced with lust and desire. Yet that would be the same as putting a Band-Aid over a cut that needed stitches. After a while, the Band-Aid would fall off and the wound would weep until it became infected. The last thing he wanted was to infect this burgeoning relationship between him and Isabella.
“I realize that we’ve only been on a couple of dates, but I can’t deny that I really like you and want to spend time with you. I also understand that my job is a big chasm between us. You told me you don’t date military guys, but you called me after our aborted blind date. All I’m asking is for you to talk to me. Tell me what’s going on in your mind. Help me understand you better.”
In reality, Ethan had no idea if things between him and Isabella would work out for the long haul. There were no guarantees in life, especially with his job. Perhaps the best thing would be to walk away. Cut the ties before they became too ingrained in him.
Her lack of words told him what he needed to know. Quitting them was the right thing to do. The hurt would last only a short while, so better to do it now before either one of them got hurt even more.
He leaned over and placed a kiss on her cheek. “Actually, maybe you’re right. Maybe this isn’t the best thing for both of us. I’m sorry to disturb your evening. I wish you a beautiful life, Isabella Knowles. You deserve nothing less.”
*
The letters on the page in front of Isabella blurred yet again. How had last night turned into such a disaster quicker than a kindergartner on his first day streaking past his teacher to get one last hug from his mom?
“Who died?”
Isabella looked up and saw Meredith standing in the hallway. Thank goodness she’d had cafeteria duty and hadn’t been able to have lunch with her friend. No way could she hide her feelings from eagle-eyed Meredith, hence this opening salvo.
She pointed her pen at the paper in front of her. “Katie’s poor attempt at telling a story. I swear she copied her sister’s work from two years ago.”
Meredith sauntered into the room and plopped down in the chair on the opposite side of Isabella’s desk. “Nice try, but I’m not buying it. I was standing at the door for a good five minutes, and let me tell you, you weren’t reading a word on that page. So again, who died?”
Damn, sometimes working with her best friend really was the pits. Maybe she could fob her off with a little white lie. “Nothing, just tired. I couldn’t sleep last night,” she said as she put a hand beneath her desk and crossed her fingers.
A speculative gleam entered Meredith’s eyes. Uh-oh, had she made the situation worse? “Ohhh, did GI Joe come a knocking and keep you up late? Spill the goods, girl.”
Isabella laughed despite herself. Trust Meredith to take a lie and run with it full steam. Pretending she’d slept with Ethan was definitely better than having to explain everything to Meredith, but lying to her friend left a bad taste in her mouth.
“Not quite. I think that ship has sailed.”
“I thought he was air force, not navy.”
“Yes, but what’s that got to do with it?” she asked.
“Well, instead of the ship has sailed, you need to say you crashed and burned. Or did he crash and burn? Could he not get it up?”
Isabella picked up her eraser and tossed it at her friend. “I don’t know if you’re insulting me or him. But no.” She sighed. Maybe talking to Meredith would help her settle everything in her mind. “Mere, I just can’t get over the fact he’s in the military.”
“Still? I thought we’d worked that out. Didn’t we decide that you were going to have a little fun with him?”
“Well, yeah, but he surprised me last night with dinner and his working dog, Sam.”
“Aww, that’s sweet. So what happened that you have the look you’re only supposed to have when your best friend deserts you, which, obviously, I haven’t?”
Isabella rolled her eyes. Meredith thought very highly of herself. “He told me about his first dog, Violet, and how she pushed him out of the way during a training exercise when a device accidentally started smoking.”
Meredith studied her for a few moments, canting her head to the side. “And you immediately went to Travis and what happened to him, so you shut yourself down without any explanation.”
Yep, her friend had the uncanny knack of hitting the nail on the head with more accuracy than a carpenter.
“Yes.” Really, there was no point denying it. Talking it out was what she needed to do and who better than her friend?
“How many times do I have to tell you…” Meredith stood and leaned over the desk as far as she could. “It. Was. A. Freak. Accident. What happened to Travis isn’t going to happen to Ethan or anyone else.”
“I know you’re right. But, emotionally, it scares me so much. Ethan told me last night that he and his dog are first into buildings. He puts himself in danger every single time.”
“How long has he been in the service?”
Isabella paused. “I think since high school. He told me his whole family is military. He’s always known what he wanted to do.”
“Okay, so he’s been deployed a few times then, correct?”
“I guess so.”
“Look, Iz, I love you; you’re my best friend. The past has you chained so firmly in the here and now because it feels safe. You don’t have to take a risk. I’m going to ask you something I’ve never asked you before. If the roles had been reversed and you’d died in a freak accident, would you expect Travis to let your death overshadow the rest of his life?”
“Of course not.” The words burst out of her without hesitation.
Shit. She would be angry if Travis shut himself away like she had over the last ten years. She’d been fooling herself for so long, but she still didn’t know which way to go. She couldn’t totally leave Travis and their romance behind. But facing her past and pursing this attraction with Ethan would put her heart at risk again. Could she do it?
“You’re right,” she murmured before turning to see her friend a couple of feet away from her. “I have to think about which way I want to handle things, but you’re right—again.”
“Of course I am,” Meredith responded with a big, cheeky grin. “So, here’s another piece of advice. Call GI Joe. You know you want to. You’ve been miserable all day, haven’t you?”
“Yes. Which is stupid as I hardly know the guy.”
“But you’re attracted to him. Hell, girl, take a chance for once in your life. Even when you were with that bank manager you were seeing for a couple of months, the dreamy look that enters your eyes when you talk about Ethan was never there. I get that the thought of him being in the military scares you, but I’m tired of having this conversation with you. If you don’t take the plunge, I’m not going to be your friend anymore.”
“Dramatic much?”
Meredith shrugged. “Whatever. I’ll do whatever I have to do to get you to start living and having fun. And if something happens, I’m only a phone call away—always, so don’t forget that.”
Isabella closed the distance between them and wrapped her friend in a hug. “Thank you for always kicking me in the butt when I need it.”
“If you listened to me in the first place, I wouldn’t have to keep doing it.” But her friend tightened her arms. There was nothing like a Meredith hug. A second later, the hug was ov
er. “Now, go call that man, apologize, and explain your past. You may be surprised at what happens. As a conversation breaker, tell him you’re on your period and you’re overemotional.”
Isabella rolled her eyes and laughed. “Ew, gross. No way am I going to say that to him. But, yeah, I need to tell him about Travis. If I put aside his career, there’s a connection between me and Ethan. Our dates haven’t been the best, but they’ve been fun. I’ve felt energized after our interactions in a way I haven’t felt in years.”
“I’m glad to hear it. It’s about time you looked forward instead of backward.” Meredith headed out the door, pausing to look back at her. “I expect you to call me and give me all the details.”
“Fine. And, Mere?”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“You’d be fine, but I’m banking some favors for whenever I need you.”
With a wave, her friend walked out the door. Meredith was the strongest woman Isabella knew, but if her bestie ever did need Isabella, she’d be there for her—without fail.
Collecting her things, she’d grade the papers at home after she’d called Ethan, Isabella walked out of her classroom emotionally lighter than when she’d walked into it eight hours ago.
Chapter Nine
The rhythmic pounding of his shoes as they hit the pavement did nothing to soothe the riot of emotions running through Ethan. Over the years, he’d never thought of himself as an emotional guy. Hell, the lives of many men depended on him keeping his cool. Sam and he were nearly always the first into situations, sniffing out buildings for explosives as well as the scent of the person they were chasing.
As he rounded the corner of his street his phone buzzed, cutting off Jon Bon Jovi mid-lyric. The desire to let the phone go to voicemail was huge, but his training was too ingrained. Ignoring a call wasn’t done in the military. It wasn’t like he was on a special forces team that got calls and had to go wheels up in less than an hour, but still, sometimes they were called out on emergencies to help the local law enforcement.
The chances of it being Isabella were unlikely. That plane had well and truly flown over the horizon.
Fuck, he’d been doing so well, it had only been a half an hour since he last thought of her. How many mistakes had he made today because of his distraction? Too many to count, and Lieutenant Colonel Blue had been less than impressed, making Ethan do countless push-ups and crunches.
Slowing to a jog, he pulled his phone out of the pocket of his arm strap, almost dropping it when he saw Isabella’s name flash across the screen. He shook his head convinced he was imaging her name. But, no, there it was, still flashing and if he didn’t answer it soon, he’d most likely miss the call.
“Isabella, is everything okay?”
“Hi, and no, everything is not okay.”
Immediately he went on high alert. “What’s wrong? Are you in danger? Have you called 9-1-1? Don’t move. Give me your coordinates and I’ll be right there.”
If she was in danger, he was going to go all airman on her.
“I’m at home and I’m not in any danger. No need to get all bossy on me.”
“Well, then, don’t call me and tell me everything’s not okay. I can’t help going into action mode, it’s what I’m trained to do. I’m not going to apologize for it.”
He was in the air force. If Isabella couldn’t accept that then there really was no future for them. Hadn’t that been the reason he’d walked out of her place the previous evening?
Her sigh echoed down the line and, even though he was annoyed with her and had convinced himself whatever they had was over, his body immediately responded to the sound.
“Ethan, I’m sorry. I didn’t call to fight. I called because…”
Silence stretched between them and he began to walk back to his house. Thank goodness he wasn’t too far away when Isabella called, he didn’t think he’d be able to get his rhythm back again. “Because?” he prompted.
“I want to see you. Can you come over to my place? Or I can come to yours if that works better.”
His heart rate increased again, and it wasn’t from him picking up his pace to get home faster. “Umm, I’m just out running, but I should be home in about ten minutes. I can be at your place in…”—he looked at his watch and did a mental calculation—“forty-five minutes. Will that work?”
“Yeah, that will be great. Thanks, Ethan, I’ll see you soon.”
The call disconnected before he had a chance to respond. Picking up his pace again, he jogged toward his house, his step much lighter than it had been ten minutes ago.
*
Twenty-four hours ago Ethan had found himself in the exact same position he was currently in—standing out front of Isabella’s door—and he’d bombed out, believing whatever they had was over. This time he’d been invited.
Before he could depress the button signaling his arrival, the door was pulled open. His breath caught at the sight in front of him. Isabella was wearing a long dress that wasn’t clingy but hinted at the delectable delights beneath. Her bare feet were sticking out from beneath the soft fabric. She looked so cool and casual.
“Hi.” The word rushed out of him.
“Hey, thanks for coming over. I realize it’s a little late. Come in.” She stepped back, and like the previous evening he preceded her down the hallway. Unlike the previous evening, he didn’t wander into the kitchen but waited until she had secured the front door and joined him.
“Why don’t we sit outside, it’s a nice evening.”
“Sure. Sounds good.”
Nerves sizzled through his bloodstream, an emotion he was getting used to experiencing around Isabella.
“Take a seat I’ll be back in a second.”
Isabella rushed back into the house while he walked over to the small table they’d sat at the first time he was at her house. The night where she’d cooked, and they’d had a wonderful time.
A few moments later she returned with a plate of cookies, the scent of cinnamon and chocolate wafted toward him. “Did you make these?” he asked as he reached for one of the still warm cookies.
“Yes, I did. Well me and a roll of cookie dough I had in the refrigerator.” She indicated to the pitcher of tea on the table. “Would you like a drink?”
“Thanks, that’d be great.” What he’d really like would be for her to get down to why she’d asked him over. As she said, it wasn’t exactly early and five a.m. was going to come around pretty quickly.
Once she’d placed the glass in front of him and he’d eaten another cookie, he noticed her straightening in her chair, as if preparing herself to get down to why they were currently sitting opposite each other.
“Ethan, I want to apologize for the way I acted last night after you shared what happened with your first dog with me.” The words tumbled out of her mouth like a new puppy who tripped over his paws while trying to work out how to run and walk.
“No apologies necessary. I should’ve watched what I said. I know that you’re still not used to the idea of my occupation.” And he would love to understand why that was. Honestly, it was something he should’ve asked her on their second date.
“That’s the thing, you shouldn’t have to watch your words around me. It’s not fair to you. It’s my issue and I have to deal with it.”
“How about sharing it with me and then we can deal with it together?”
“It’s complicated,” she started and then stopped.
“Isn’t everything in life?”
She chuckled softly. “Yeah, you’re right. You know my dad was in the military, did I tell you that?”
Her father was in the military, and she had a problem with it? What the hell?
Years of training to expect the unexpected enabled him to keep his expression neutral. “No, I didn’t know that.”
“Yeah, he goes down to the veterans’ center and plays cards with the guys. One day a grandson of his friend happened to
be there. Dad started talking about me and the next thing I know Dad’s calling me telling me about this date he’d set me up on.”
The more she talked, the more everything fell into place. Ethan was well aware that Linc would go play cards with his grandfather. “That would be Linc you’re talking about. I’m pretty sure at the time of the arrangement, I wasn’t in on the agreement. I went out one night with Linc and, well, let’s just say the next time he dares me to a drinking game, I’m going to be saying no.”
Isabella laughed. “Well, it hasn’t turned out so bad, has it?”
Ethan raised his eyebrow, she really didn’t think their false starts were a bad thing? “I don’t know, you tell me. You know I’ve been more than happy to see you, it’s you who’s been throwing up the barriers.”
A little of the lightness shining in her eyes dimmed. He steeled himself from feeling guilty. They’d been playing this back and forth game for a few of weeks now. The time had come to go forward or stick to his guns and not at all.
“This is true,” she said quietly and took a sip of her drink.
He wondered if she was taking the time to collect her thoughts. There was no way she was getting ready to tell him to leave and never come back. If she’d felt that way, she wouldn’t have called him.
“What’s going on here, Izzy? You’re sending so many mixed signals I don’t know which ones to read. If we are to move forward you’re gonna need to start talking. Explain why you asked me over. As nice as the cookies are, I’m sure your invite wasn’t for a late evening tea party.”
A shudder rippled through her body. “God, I really don’t know where to start. Every time I think I’ve got it sorted in my brain, I open my mouth to speak and then nothing comes out.”
“I think the beginning really is when you told me your dad was in the military. Which branch?”
“Army. Like you, I’m the quintessential military brat, moving from base to base. Never staying long enough to form lasting friendships.”
Blind Date Bet Page 7
