by Vi Voxley
She'd been right about Isabel, then, months back when Dana first suspected that something wasn’t quite right.
"Gods," she said. "This explains a lot."
"Right?" Rebecca said, laughing. "You rest now. I'll make sure that crazy bitch is a hundred feet from you at all times."
She got up and was ready to leave. Dana caught her by the sleeve of her long black blouse, pulling her back. There was something else, too.
"How come you're so nice to me?" she asked carefully. "This can't be any more fun for you than it is for her. I'm glad you're not crazy, but I never thought to ask. How could you take care of me for all those months, listening to me bitch about having two hunks who I wasn't sure I wanted, and not slap me across the face?"
Rebecca chuckled, although Dana didn't miss the deep sadness in her eyes.
"This is easier to answer than you might expect," she said. "Some people don't feed on the misery of others when they're unhappy themselves. Sure, it hurt for a while. You didn't even come here looking for a match and you got the best two. I just think that's life. Why cry over spilled milk?"
"That's an incredibly healthy approach to life," Dana said. "Especially today when I start to think everyone is going a bit insane."
Rebecca smiled, nodding.
“Well, everyone copes in their own way. I guess this is mine.”
"So tell me," Dana prompted, the hope rising in her chest while the pains in her stomach only got worse.
She'd have to call the healers soon to make sure everything was alright with the baby.
"Do you think I'm making a mistake?"
Rebecca regarded her. The long look made Dana dig deep herself, trying to see all parts of her in a neutral light. That was the problem with being a person. You never knew what sides of yourself you could trust. Isabel, for example, clearly didn't see herself through sane eyes.
"Honestly? Yes."
The answer surprised Dana. Perhaps she was too used to women like Isabel. She'd seen a lot of them on her trips. Girls and women who'd been best friends before didn't speak a word to each other when one found their happiness and the other didn't.
That was the problem with the Sanguine. Everything was so sharp, so extreme. Issues like finding a man that wouldn't have meant anything back on Terra were the entire world aboard the quest ship.
Very few had the strength of mind that Rebecca was portraying to swallow the bitter pill of disappointment and still be glad for the others.
"You do?" she asked.
The dark-haired woman smiled, nodding.
"Of course. I tried to hint that back in the villa, saying you needed to make up your mind but I guess I fed the fear more than the certainty. But yes, I do. More so, I think you know it too. You are our brave leader, Dana. Where's all your courage now? Isabel was right about that much. You got yourself twisted, only not in the way she thinks.”
Dana’s heart beat faster in her chest, but she made herself take a deep breath and listen without panicking.
"You think you ran away from Sean's father. I think you made a brave decision to do right by your son and left. Many women never dare to do that, choosing to keep living the life they know in their hearts is unhealthy, forever. You went for it.
“The same goes for your fated. You think you ran away from them too, didn't give them a chance. Well, I call bullshit on that. First, you have a baby in your belly so clearly there was something. And you didn't leave for almost nine months. You're not even gone now. I don't think you'll leave either."
That was all news to Dana. Not the concepts as such, just the fact that Rebecca thought so.
"Why didn't you tell me this before?" she asked, her voice shaking a little as she thought whether she'd completely ruined her one chance to find happiness.
"Unlike Isabel, I don't like living other people's lives for them," Rebecca said. "Answer me this, though. Do you want this baby?"
"Of course!" Dana said, shocked, wincing as a searing shot of pain nearly made her jump. "It feels like I'm being torn in two right now, but of course. The second I heard of the baby, I was overjoyed."
"Okay," Rebecca allowed. "So none of that talk about Hannah killing herself and all the other complications doesn't bother you?"
"No," Dana said firmly. "I don't fear dying when I have the chance to bring a new life into this world. That's what bothered me. They should have told me the truth, trusted me with it."
"There you have it," Rebecca said, getting up, smiling at her. "It's a risk. You know it, everybody knows and you still go for it because the reward is simply that great.
“The same applies to your bond. Sure, they could have handled a few things better, but did they really ever give you the impression they don't love Sean, or you?"
"No."
"What else is there, then?"
What else is there? Gods, I've fucked up. I've fucked up so badly. I can't believe they'd-
Dana stopped her thought in its tracks. She'd had enough of being afraid of what her fateds would or wouldn't do. Or she herself, for that matter. All that mattered was that she give it a shot, a true shot, unhindered by fear.
She just had to believe it wasn't too late yet.
Then the pain returned with a vengeance. Dana's mouth opened in a scream just as the ship's alarms started howling.
"Attention!" she could hear the captain of the Sanguine say. "This is a red alert. The League is here. I repeat, the League is here. Prepare for battle. Follow the instructions of our Gargon guards."
Dana stared up into Rebecca's wide, frightened eyes. Then the pain ripped through her again, this time with the clear intention of splitting her in two.
"Oh shit," Rebecca murmured, going for the ship's inner comm link. "Dana, this is not a good time to go into labor."
She knew that. Her horrified mind calculated the weeks, coming to the same conclusion again and again as Rebecca called the healers.
It was too soon. She was going to give birth to her baby alone, in the middle of a battle, much too soon.
26
Dana
The Sanguine was preparing for war as Dana stumbled into the great hall.
It crossed her mind that whoever designed the layout of the ship could have put the med bay at a more easily accessible location. To get there, she had to cross the entire length of the ship and it wasn't easy. Rebecca was doing what she could, but she was thin and frail and it took her a lot of effort to basically drag Dana along.
"Mack!" she called, seeing the barkeep in the crowd.
"Dana, what the–" he asked, rushing closer and helping Rebecca out.
"She's having the baby now," the girl said, trying to hide the frightened look in her eyes from Dana. "Right here if we don't get her into the med bay soon."
"Did you notify the healers?" Mack asked, confused. "Where are they? Don't we have lifters and other things for occasions like this?"
"I did," Rebecca told him, exasperated. "They can't. There have already been wounded. Can't you feel the ship shaking? I think the League is coming for us."
They know I'm here, the thought crossed Dana's mind. Or they think I'm here. It's my fault they're attacking my ship. The twins want to get even with Havoc and Chase.
She didn't say it out loud. Everyone aboard knew what was coming already. As for Dana herself, she had never wished to have her fateds by her side more than in that moment. Her body felt close to bursting and the enemy was closing in. She and everyone she loved were in so much danger it had lost its meaning. The panicking ship around her barely registered.
All she could think of was how she'd left things with the warlords.
There was no fear in Dana's heart anymore. She was pretty certain she'd used up a lifetime supply of that in her lonely months of whining about men who wanted nothing else but for her to give their bond a chance. Fate was a cruel mistress, it seemed, if it had clouded her mind so badly.
For a moment, Dana thought her warlords didn't deserve someone as broken as he
r, but that was the whole point, wasn't it?
It wasn't about deserving and what she thought they should want. In the end, it was Sean who'd been right. They loved her, she knew that even if she'd never given them the opportunity to confess their feelings for her. And she loved them. It was as simple as that. A lifetime of protecting herself hadn't been easy to shake off, however.
Now the only thing she needed was to tell them, to see them again, if only for a moment.
Tears threatened to start falling as Dana stumbled on, groaning in pain.
"Sean," she panted. "Where's Sean?"
"I left him with the Gargon guards," Rebecca said. "I thought he'd like them better than the crew right now. I'm glad. Now it means he's safer than we are."
"Good," Dana said, thinking she saw a glimpse of her son in the crowd, pushing through the people to get to her. "Good. He's safe, then."
"Mom!" Sean cried out as the starboard side of the ship simply... fell away.
At least that's how it looked like in the slow motion that played before Dana's eyes. The explosion knocked the wind out of her and everyone around her. They went crashing down as the pieces of the ship rained down on all of them.
The next thing she knew, there was someone small and quick covering her. She realized that it was Sean, trying to protect her from the debris with his own body. Dana tried to push him away – it was she that was supposed to protect him, not the other way around, but Sean had gotten stronger than she knew.
All the training he'd excitedly done with the Gargon warriors, trying to mimic them, had apparently given him some tough strength that was hard to counter in her condition.
There were people screaming everywhere around them and Dana was blinded by the flashes of light coming from the barking plasma guns discharged all over what was left of the grand hall. The Gargons had arrived and were shooting at the attackers, great ugly green beasts with yellow eyes and gigantic swords, like golems out of a children’s book.
Dana let out a cry of horror, seeing a few of them head their as they were still struggling to their feet.
The Gargon guards were trying to intervene, but the Rabors had the numbers on their side. Like a big green wave, they just kept coming. Dana and Rebecca backed away, drawing their guns, as did Mack. They'd all taken lessons from their own weapons master and the Gargons both. They could shoot – the question was how well.
Not to mention Dana's body was still trying to bring her down without any help from the enemies.
She saw Sean pull the small blade the warlords had gifted him, too. Her heart swelled with pride. Everyone around her was fighting for themselves, and for her.
It didn't matter much once the League reached her, naturally, but Dana was long prepared to go down fighting. The enemies were despicable and the fact that they would come for her was beyond horrible. There had never been any doubt for her. If the League reached her, she'd stand her ground and look death in the eye.
A fresh surge of agony went through her then and Dana collapsed, holding on to her belly. The only fear she had in her heart was for her baby. It shouldn't have happened like that. She wanted to spare the baby of all the sadness life had treated her and Sean with and now her child was going to be born in the midst of a battle.
The enemy unit rushed in. The guns barked, barely doing anything to slow them down.
Then a hush went through the hall. Dana opened her eyes just in time to see it. Her damaged, destroyed ship was suddenly full of people staring in one direction. Everyone, enemy and ally alike, were backing away from that center of attention.
Chase and Havoc dashed across the hall with speed she hadn't thought was possible. They didn't pay attention to anyone or anything, going through metal and enemies alike like they weren't even there.
The gigantic sword rose and fell in Havoc's hand as the warlord pushed enemies away with his sheer bulk alone. By his side, Chase's gun flashed so fast Dana's eyes couldn't keep up with the flashes, hitting the mark every time.
There were warriors in their tow, following their commanders into the melee. To her eyes, there were only her fateds, coming right towards her without missing a beat.
The League's warriors had noticed it too. The question of whether they were looking for a pregnant woman was answered when the Rabors roared and headed towards her, all of them, forgetting completely about the commanders.
"Go, go!" Dana yelled to her friends. "It's me they want. Go, run! Take Sean with you!"
"Like hell we're leaving you," Rebecca said furiously, firing into the charging line of enemies with a sidearm a Gargon guard had given her. "Sean, get back."
Dana watched on in horror and growing admiration as they all stood their ground. Then her eyes flicked back to her fateds.
There was a good reason for that as her heart nearly stopped in her chest.
She was laying down against the broken furniture and pieces of the wall in one corner of the hall. The entire League army seemed to be gathered in the Sanguine as much as Dana could tell. And the warlords were standing between her and them now.
They looked magnificent. When they turned to check upon her, Dana could see their eyes burn in a way she'd never seen before. She was finally witnessing the men she was truly bonded to – fierce, powerful warriors who didn't have an equal anywhere in the galaxy.
When the Rabors charged at her, they met the enemies head-on. Havoc's long sword cut heads and legs and even split entire torsos open in one quick blow, splattering blood everywhere. Chase opted between his guns and the long daggers so fast Dana couldn't see him move to throw the weapons into whichever hand he needed them in. They were a blur in her eyes, a mess of gold and blue and red, fighting down an entire army for her.
She screamed when her own personal battle with childbirth kept getting more excruciating by the second.
Rebecca and Mack were moving forward, shooting around her fated along with the other crew members of the Sanguine. Even Dana took aim whenever the bursts of pain let her concentrate long enough to take a shot, awkward as it was lying down.
"Mom, look out!" Sean screamed then and a shot went past Dana's head so closely that it made her wince from the heat.
In all that mess, it made sense she hadn't seen Isabel approach. The woman had taken her time and sneaked around all the fighters, climbing over the ruins of the ship's walls to get to her. Now she stood on top of one of the larger fallen pieces, shooting at her.
Dana's shock was so great that she let even the second shot go by her without reacting.
She'd thought Isabel was mad at her, insanely jealous even. The possibility of her coming to kill her had never crossed Dana's mind, yet there she was. Isabel's eyes were wild and full of hatred as she climbed down her perch and started walking towards her, taking shots.
Sean dashed between them, ready to defend her again.
Dana screamed.
"No! Sean, no! Get down!"
Her desperate cries seemed to stop even Isabel in her tracks for a moment. It seemed that her irrational hatred of Dana didn't make her capable of killing a child.
Small fucking mercies.
"You fucking bitch!" Rebecca cried, turning and seeing what was unfolding.
Everything was a complete mess. The pain got so bad Dana's hands twitched and she dropped the gun from her grip, the absolute worst time for that. She clutched her belly, whimpering in the shocks of intense agony that felt like the baby inside her had decided to come out whether her body was ready or not.
Rebecca started running towards Isabel, Dana scrambled for her gun. She knew Isabel was the better shot and Rebecca was way too furious to take caution into consideration.
There.
Dana's hands closed around the gun right when Isabel took another shot and they could all hear Rebecca scream. Dana looked up just in time to see her friend topple from the ruins, cradling her belly. Isabel was still coming towards Dana, pure loathing in her eyes.
"Sean, get away!" Dana ordered her son, s
till staunchly standing in front of her.
Isabel kept coming. There was no one else close. Havoc and Chase were fighting an entire army, Rebecca was down and Mack was nowhere to be seen. Dana hoped he hadn't gotten hit by an unlucky shot, but that was not the time for premature warning.
"Sean, get away!" she bellowed at her son.
That, finally, made the boy move out of the way, still gripping the small blade her fated had given him. Dana was left staring eye to eye with Isabel. The other woman was so close now, but Isabel's line of sight wasn't perfect. Dana was supporting herself on a large piece of ceiling, her hands rested on the block, keeping her old friend at aim as she kept coming.
"I don't want to shoot you," she called. "Stop, Isabel! This in insane!"
"It really is," the woman agreed. "I came here to find happiness and you took it from me!"
You poor delusional child.
Dana hesitated. Isabel was out of her mind, but to shoot her was not much better. It would have been outright killing her if she missed the shot and Dana didn't believe her aim was that good.
"Chase should have been mine!" Isabel hissed, firing shots that went over Dana's head.
Sean crouched down behind the same piece of ceiling as well, his entire body shivering. Looking at her son, Dana's resolve hardened. She took aim at Isabel, fury seething in her as the pain in her belly was growing to be unbearable.
"I'm giving you one last chance to stop!" Dana called to her. "Don't make me do this!"
Isabel laughed, a wild, cackling sound.
"You are a coward!" she screamed at Dana. "You always have been! What did I tell you before? You can't even fight for your own life! Chase will be happier without you, I promise!"
She stopped, taking aim again.
"As soon as you and that brat in your belly are dead."
Dana pulled the trigger. The shot went through the air, hitting Isabel square in the hip and the woman went tumbling down.
