by Robin Roseau
And then I focused on the food.
* * * *
Twenty minutes later found the meal over, the remnants handled, hands, mouths, and tentacles clean, and the two of us looking at each other. I crossed my legs and smiled inwardly when her eyes dropped for a moment. "Gotcha," I thought.
"Well, Jasmine," I said, "What do you have planned for the remainder of our evening?"
"I don't plan every move in advance, Andie."
"Were you too preoccupied while I was getting ready to think about it?" I asked. I smiled. "Maybe you were busy watching some of the mating candidates."
"Are you suggesting I was watching you in the shower?"
I considered for a moment. "I was wondering something. Do you think we could call a truce for the rest of the night?"
"I wasn't aware we were fighting."
"So we haven't been sparring?"
The tips of her tentacles waved at me. "You don't enjoy our conversations?"
"I want to drop my defenses and not worry you'll take advantage of it. Is it possible I could relax?"
"Of course," she said. "As I suggested earlier, I thought about inviting one or two more and teaching you a game, but if you're fatigued, we can talk until it's time to send you to your bed."
"Are you offering to share the entire evening with me?"
"I am."
"Will it disappoint you if I ask you to choose?"
"No, but then you can't complain if you preferred the other choice." I nodded acceptance. "I'd like to teach you this game," she said. "Nearly all the ETs play it. Do you care whom I invite?"
"If you invite a pair of Loris, will they be bickering and sparring?"
"Probably, but you don't have to let yourself respond to it, Andie."
"Then you should invite whomever you would like to invite."
"Let's move to the living room and see who wishes to come." She rose to her feet then offered tentacles to me. I thought she did so deliberately, but I accepted, letting her pull me to my feet. Then I kept control of one of them and did a little pirouette, wrapping the tentacle around my waist. I slipped my arm around her shoulders and then smiled at her.
"Very adroit," she said. But she didn't pull away as she led me into the living room. She released me to the sofa, taking the other end. "We can play with three, although I prefer the dynamics when there are a few more than that. But I'll start with Clover and we'll go from there."
She cocked her head. Then I heard one side of the conversation. Fat lot of good it did me. She didn't speak English. But then she switched to English. "She was surprised but sounds pleased to come. I'd like to invite Bay and Cedar. I'll ask them to behave."
"All right."
This conversation was in English, which surprised me. "Good evening Cedar. No, there's nothing wrong. This is a social call. Mating candidate Andromeda is with me, and I wish to teach her Boardwalk. Clover is on her way. Would you and your husband care to help teach her?" Pause, pause. "Excellent. That would be lovely." Pause. "And Cedar? She's had a big day." Pause. "Perfect. Thank you. See you soon."
"She's had a big day is code for be kind to the human?"
"Cedar is very nurturing," Jasmine replied. "Before anyone arrives, I need to tell you something. This game is intellectual in a fashion similar to chess, although quite different. But there is one aspect that tends to be slightly physical. It is only light touch, but it can be rather possessive. If that will make you uncomfortable, I can block it."
"Do you really think I'm going to mind if anyone touches me? They aren't going for my ass or boobs are they?"
"No, nothing like that." But then she looked me up and down pointedly.
"Oh, don't give me that," I said. "You like seeing me self-conscious. Were you really offering to back off?"
"Yes."
"This isn't a case of setting up the naïve human, is it? If you want to play mind games with me, can you give me one evening off?"
"No mind games."
"Thank you. We should play the game the way it is intended."
"Good. I hope you'll be comfortable. I'm going to set up. You can relax for a minute or two." Then she rose to her feet and stepped away. She returned nearly immediately carrying a couple of cushions. She made multiple trips, setting the cushions on the floor. Then she moved the coffee table well to the side and arranged the cushions in a circle. She made one more trip and returned with a wood box about the size of a typical picnic basket. This she set down in the space left by the cushions.
"All this alien technology, and you play on the floor leaning against those cushions?"
"It is very low tech," she said. She cocked her head, and then I heard the door open. I turned my head, and Clover stepped in.
I rose to my feet. Jasmine collected me on the way to the door, wrapping two tentacles around me to guide me along, but then she released me and clasped hands and tentacles with Clover.
But then I stepped straight to Clover and accepted a tight hug, tentacles practically everywhere. Her tentacles snuffled, and she whispered. "You really smell good, Andromeda."
"Tonight I am Andie," I said.
She snuffled a little more before releasing me. I slid a hand down to one of her tentacles and then stepped backwards, sliding my hand until I was cupping just the tip. I raised it to my lips and kissed it briefly, then just held it like I might a hand. I turned to Jasmine.
She was staring, open-mouthed.
"She says I smell good," I said. "Why do you look so shocked?"
"You kissed her tentacle."
I immediately dropped it. "Oh god. Did I do something wrong?" I turned to Clover. "I'm sorry. I wasn't really thinking. I didn't know that meant something. Please don't tell Peony! I'm really sorry!"
"Relax, Andie," she said, her tentacles quivering a little. "You didn't do anything wrong. Kissing a tentacle tip is an offer, but it is a simple offer and not at all what you're thinking. It is something good friends do."
"You're sure?"
"Quite sure," she said.
I glanced at Jasmine. Her entire posture had now changed, and her tentacles were arrayed about her, the tips quivering like Clover's had.
"All right," I said slowly. I gestured. "What's with the wriggling appendages?"
"A sign of mirth," Clover said. "You have heard us vocalize a laugh, although it sounds different from a human laugh. But when our tentacles are free to express themselves, you can learn more about our mood from them than anything else."
"Catseye body language."
"Just so," agreed Jasmine.
I turned back to Clover. "All right. And kissing one?"
"Humans find it startling," Jasmine said quickly. "I think you should show her, Clover."
"How startling?"
"It varies dramatically," Jasmine said. "My personal sample size has been very small, however, and all positive. But I have been extremely careful, especially after hearing of reactions other Catseye have experienced."
"Will you let me show you?" Clover asked. I eyed her carefully and nodded. So she stepped closer. "It usually starts with a hug." I nodded again, so she wrapped around me, including one tentacle against my left cheek, another wrapping around and just slightly over my nose.
"This feels like the Vulcan mind meld," I said.
"What is that?"
"Television show reference," I said.
"I have placed my tentacles here very carefully," she said, and the very tips both tapped my face in emphasis. They were quite clever. "But if I place one across your lips, it is a request."
"For me to kiss."
"Yes. It is a kiss between friends, not lovers. But if you kiss, it is an offer."
"To kiss back?"
"Not exactly. Do you want me to tell you or surprise you?"
"Oh, why not? Surprise me."
The tentacle across my nose shifted until it was placed across my lips. So I gave it a little kiss. And in response, it began worming it's way into my mouth!
I ope
ned to complain, and the tip slipped right inside.
"Don't bite," Clover said into my ear. "Please don't bite."
"Mmmm mmm," I said, my mouth full of Catseye tentacle. In response, she teased my tongue for a moment and then withdrew. But she held me tightly a little longer before releasing me and stepping back.
I stared at her, my hand over my mouth. Neither of them said a word; they both watched me.
Finally I said, "You Frenched me."
She cocked her head. "Was that slang?"
"Yes, I suppose it was. When human lovers kiss, they may use tongue. In English, that is referred to as French kissing. I don't know why."
The tentacles quivered. "This is not between lovers," she said. "It is a little dominant, however. Mothers do this to daughters. I do this -- did this -- with my younger sister. Lovers do it, too, but unless there is an imbalance of power in their relationship, it is typically mutual, and a little more... Hmm. Teasing is involved."
"If a Catseye lays her tentacle there, you are under no obligation to kiss," Jasmine added. "If you do, it is an offer, and that was an especially brief acceptance. Some Catseye, the ones who do not know humans well, have seen some humans accept this, and they are more forward about it than they should be."
"Explain."
"They may not wait for you to kiss. I find it presumptuous to the point of being rude, and from the few reactions I've seen, the humans involved have felt the same way."
"I withdrew quickly because your, well, your mouth language was not encouraging," Clover said. "If you wish to encourage, you can close your lips."
"But don't bite."
"Don't bite," they said together.
"All right. How submissive is this?"
"Only a little," Jasmine said.
"All right. And when I kissed it the first time?"
"A similar offer," Cover said. "But not one you should make casually."
"It can also be considered presumptuous," Jasmine clarified.
"To the point of being rude?"
"No. And it depends upon your relationship with the Catseye involved. If you did it to someone you barely knew, then it looks, hmm. Let us use a human expression. It looks like a backwoods hick trying to act sophisticated."
"I am a backwoods hick," I said.
"I thought it was sweet," Clover said. "I do not see you as backwoods, to use the term our illustrious administrator selected."
"I think I understand. Don't take this the wrong way, but you taste funny, Clover."
"Every human feels that way," Jasmine said. "Some grow to enjoy the taste."
"Got it," I said.
"So, is it just us, or are more coming?" Clover asked.
"We're going to have a Loris invasion," I said. "But they seem to be slow." I chuckled at my joke. Neither Catseye got it. "You know. A Slow Loris. Get it? No?" I sighed. "Is this mic on?"
"What is she talking about?" Clover asked.
"I'm not sure. Why don't you start showing her the game?"
* * * *
Clover and I sat leaning against adjacent cushions as she began to teach me the game. But then, mid explanation, she asked, "Do you mind if I touch?"
"No. Is this part of the game?"
"No. It is only touch."
"Feel free," I said.
She slipped a single tentacle over then continued her explanation. The tentacle had a mind of its own, stretching across my back underneath the camisole with the tip coming over my shoulder to wrap partway around my neck. It was distracting, and I reached up and caressed it, but after that I was able to pay better attention.
Bay and Cedar arrived while Clover was still explaining the game, Bay carrying a small wooden box. I started to get up to offer greetings, but Cedar waved me back. Instead she stepped around to offer a brief handclasp, followed by her husband. Then they began bickering over who got to sit next to me. But they were doing it in English, so I was nearly positive it was really for my benefit.
"If the two of you weren't dangerous seated beside each other," Jasmine said, "I'd settle this by occupying the contested position myself."
"Well, I'm going to resolve it," I said. "Is it the intention of whoever sits beside me to touch me?"
"Of course," said Bay.
"That was the wrong answer, Husband," Cedar said. "You'll see."
I smiled. "Bay, I'm sorry, but you're male. Cedar, would you care to sit here?"
"I would love to, Andromeda," she said and immediately plopped down.
"I hope, when we are engaged in activities as friends, you will call me Andie."
"Of course, Andie," Cedar said. She turned to Bay. "I told you it was the wrong answer." Then she shifted slightly closer, set a hand on my arm, and stroked the skin.
In turn, Bay grumbled but took the seat on the other side of Clover. But perhaps that wasn't entirely bad for him, as he was barely seated before he had a Catseye tentacle draped over him. I commented on that.
"Don't let this fool you," he said with a gesture. "She's much, much happier touching you than me."
"Because I smell good."
"Because you haven't fur. They don't actually like fur. If you notice, the tentacle is turned sideways, protecting the suckers."
"He's right," Clover said. "But the contact is still nice."
Jasmine saw to beverages, and then she took the remaining open seat. A moment later I saw a tentacle slide over to twine around Cedar's arm, beginning at her shoulder and covering her bicep. It was contact without infringing Cedar's movements.
Bay opened the wooden box. I saw he had little statues in the same color as the ones Clover had been showing me. But while Jasmine's statues were all of Catseye, I could immediately see that Bay's were Loris. He tut-tutted then reached across the table, removed my statue, and replaced it with a Loris. "Humans look far more like us than they do a Catseye."
Clover then reversed his decision, setting the little Loris statue back in front of Bay. "Humans do not look at all like a Loris. Other than our eyes, all humans say we're the closest in appearance to their own."
Bay then swapped statues again. "Not once they see you more closely resemble one of their aquatic creatures."
I sighed. "Give me both of those."
"Don't you dare break the tentacles off," Jasmine said.
"I wouldn't dream of it. But I might shave the Loris," I said. Bay harumphed, but Clover handed them to me. I examined both. "These are cute," I said, waving the Loris. "And when we play in your home, I would be honored to be portrayed as a Loris." Then I set the Catseye statue back into play and handed the Loris to Clover, who handed it to Bay. He harumphed again, but Cedar squeaked her amusement.
Together the four of them taught me the game, and even in the teaching, I could see there would be different play styles. Bay explained, "This game was diplomacy."
"I see that."
"No, the way the game was invented was diplomacy. Nearly every race that plays games at all has an ancient, traditional game based on similar principles. It was at a, well, a diplomatic convention that two groups of attendees sat down in the evening to engage in a little beverage diplomacy."
"They were getting drunk together?"
He squeaked. "Yes. And one recommended a game, their species version of a precursor to this game. Of course, the others wished to play a game from their homes. But the beverages had not yet completed their desired goal, so tempers remained in check. It was actually a species that has no such game that suggested there were similarities in all the proposed games and issued a challenge. Devise a new game with principles common to all the species."
Jasmine and Clover both snuffled. "They derailed the entire convention. Everyone in attendance, absolutely everyone got involved, and no other business happened. They negotiated for weeks. They played sample games, testing this variation and that one. Finally they came to this game, although there is a lengthy list of variations that can be added. We are teaching you the basic game tonight."
I smi
led. "It would have been interesting to be there."
"I imagine," she said. "So now this is the one game that transcends nearly every species in the Federation of Allied Planets, and it has even become highly popular on many of our home planets."
"Wow, okay," I said.
"But because of this, because this game has a history in ancient traditions," explained Bay, "the different species talk about the game using different words. For instance, the Catseye are businesswomen, and they see almost everything in terms of business. And so they use business terms."
"Vassal is not a business term," I said.
"It is the closet English word to a Catseye concept," Jasmine explained. "To us, it applies in a variety of situations, including business -- or Boardwalk."
"Got it."
"Other species use phrases most often used in warfare," Bay continued. "And in a way, business and war have many things in common."
"And to the Loris?"
"We think of food sources. The markers are fields, and the stones are workers."
"The Loris are not known for winning Boardwalk tournaments," Jasmine said. "But they are known for an aesthetic play style and are popular players for casual play."
"Although we're still better than a mere human," Bay said with a squeak or two.
"I have no doubt."
And so they taught me the play, and then we set up for our game. But before the first move, Jasmine said, "I wish us to come to a mutual agreement."
"It is not your turn to make a proposal," Bay replied immediately.
"And yet I propose one anyway. If the human is swept from play five minutes from now, she will learn nothing. I propose we leave her alone unless she attacks one of us."
"Alliances-"
"Let her propose them if she wants them."
They all turned to study me.
"You don't need to coddle me."
"The game has no natural handicap," Jasmine said. "This is the best we can do. The other choice that I have seen work very well is to offer yourself as a willing vassal."
"That isn't legal!" exclaimed Bay.
"It certainly is," Jasmine said.
Bay looked to his wife, I thought for support. She only said, "We are in a Catseye home, and if this is a variation allowed in this home, we should not argue."
