Shallow River

by H. D. Carlton

  Her long, black hair absorbs all light, the curls bouncing as she walks across the parking lot. River has a striking beauty unlike anything I’ve seen. Her golden eyes and tanned skin are ethereal, but it’s not just the features of her face but the manner in which she holds herself. She walks with her spine straight and her chin high. She speaks with her head slightly tilted down, looking up at you through angled brows and long lashes, making you feel likes she’s looking into you instead of at you.

  She’s beautiful. And completely, utterly, abso-fucking-lutely tempting.

  Goddamn it. I run a hand over my face, already frustrated with how this is going. I shake my head, ripping my hand through my hair and willing myself to get it together. Last thing I need is making her think I’m trying to make a move on her. I shouldn’t be looking at her like that—thinking of her in such a way. But the surge of jealousy coating my veins like oil is hard to ignore. A beautiful girl reduced to a goddamn punching bag by a psychotic piece of shit, what a goddamn shame.

  She can’t see me yet. I’m hiding behind a pine tree, watching her ass swing as she walks towards her car, remembering her sweet cinnamon smell from when she met my parents. She walks like there's someone hot on her heels but is stubbornly refusing to run. Rushed and tense, but confident with her chin raised high with pride.

  Her hometown is bred into every move she makes. It shows that she grew up in a volatile and dangerous environment, but with every step she beats down her past with a vengeance unlike anything I’ve ever seen.

  She will not cower from her roots, yet she bends like a rosebush for my brother. Her thorns may bite, but ultimately, he will clip them off until she’s left with a weak backbone that will easily snap beneath his hands. Everything that once made her vibrant and beautiful will wilt and eventually, he’ll toss her aside when there’s nothing left of her.

  I take a step in her direction, but I’m stopped short when a short girl with blonde hair bounds up to River, hooking her arm with River's and dragging her away from her car.

  The girl says something to River, causing her to throw her head back with laughter. Something in my chest tightens and twists viciously. Something I really don’t want to put a fucking name to. I need to get my damn head on straight.

  If I’m fucked in the head, there’s no way I’ll be able to my worm my way into her good graces and help her get the hell away from Ryan. Before he completely breaks her. Before he does something like kill her. There were days when I was sure Alison was dead. I’ll be damned if I let another innocent girl find herself in that position—where there’s even a possibility that she was murdered.

  Don’t know why I didn’t just go into the personal bodyguard profession, the way my life is turning out.

  Stalking her is my only resort. What the fuck else can I do? Text her? That psychopath more than likely is synced to her Cloud and is reading every interaction she has without her knowledge.

  Ryan is just giving her the illusion that she has any semblance of privacy and independence. Wouldn’t surprise me if he starts giving her phone to her as a fucking privilege and taking it away from her as punishment—it’s exactly what happened with Alison.

  My phone buzzes in my back pocket. Distractedly, I pull it out as I watch River and her friend get farther and farther away. I decide not to follow her today any longer. Approaching River is going to be like approaching a scared dog. She’s going to bite, and she’s going to bite really fucking hard. Best that I don’t put her in that position in front of other people. Or rather, put myself through that in front of other people.

  Glancing down at my phone, my heart seizes. As if I conjured her into existence, Alison’s name is flashing across my phone.

  She never calls me. Not anymore at least. We parted ways the same day her and Ryan officially parted ways. As much of an asshole as it might make me, I only felt responsible for getting her to safety, not picking up the pieces for her.

  “Mako,” I answer, keeping my voice professional.

  “Hey…” she trails off awkwardly. “I’m sorry to bother you. But uh, I’m a little concerned actually. About Ryan’s new girlfriend, River?” she poses her name as a question, not sure if I had already met her or not.

  “Yeah, I’ve met her,” I say. The timing and reason behind Alison’s call only reinforces my determination. Feels almost like kismet.

  Alison pauses, and then clears her throat. “I’ve tried talking to her. She’s… she’s not a very approachable person.” I crack a smile at that. Quite a fucking underwhelming statement if you ask me. She continues, “Ryan’s got her under his spell, and even though I’ve come out from under the fog, I don’t know how the hell to get someone else to.”

  It’s nice knowing that I’m not the only one wants to try and help River escape. Alison is kind—inherently kind. She’s not the type of girl to go into a jealous rage when her high school sweetheart moves onto someone else. No, I’m pretty fucking sure there’s a small part of Alison that is glad it’s not her anymore. But that doesn’t mean she’s above letting the new girl suffer when she’s more than aware of what’s happening to her behind closed doors.

  I wait. I already know what she wants. Little does she know I’ve already stuck my nose in the middle of something that probably shouldn’t have my fucking nose in it.

  “Can you talk to her, Mako? Maybe try to convince her that she’s gotten into something pretty… pretty brutal? The only reason I survived that relationship is because of you. You got me out. You saved me. I need you to save her, too.”

  I sigh. I hate when she says shit like that.

  “You saved yourself Alison, not me. I just gave you the push to do it. You were the one in the relationship, and you were the only one that was able to claw your way out of it. That was all you.”

  Girl is tougher than she gives herself credit for. Alison has been through too much for her to give the credit to someone else. No fucking way will I ever accept that.

  She growls under her breath. My mouth quirks up, the sound cute coming from her. “You know what I mean, Mako. I never would have had the strength to leave if you weren’t there to help. I—I know I did that myself. But you were still my stepping stones.”

  Frustrated, I pivot and start walking back to my car. I’m lingering on a campus I don’t belong on, where anyone can see me. The last thing I need is someone recognizing me. Ryan may have graduated, but he left his imprint on this place. And a lot of people know who I am and exactly how he feels about me. Those same people are also really fucking loyal dogs, too.

  “I was planning on helping her, Ali,” I say finally, changing the subject back to the matter at hand. It makes me queasy when she gets all sentimental on me.

  She sighs in her relief, which just makes the responsibility I feel even more suffocating. Now I have Alison counting on me, too.

  I open the car door, nearly throw myself into the car, and slam the door shut. The heat is stifling, but I don’t turn the car on yet.

  “But I can’t do this forever,” I sigh, admitting the thought that’s been haunting me since I learned what Ryan was doing to her. “I don’t know if I can save all his girlfriends from him forever. Maybe River will leave eventually, but we both know there’s going to be another one. Ryan isn’t the type to stay alone. He needs someone to control and break, and if it’s not you, or River, it’s going to be another girl. How do I spend the rest of my fucking like keeping tabs on him and trying to convince his girlfriends to leave?”

  It’s killing me, is what I don’t say. The stress from it is exhausting, but when I imagine what they’re going through, my stress seems so trivial and I don’t have the willpower to walk away.

  Alison scoffs. “That’s why we convince River to press charges. I…I was too scared. But if River comes forward, I will too. I’ll testify against him or whatever. We end it with River.” The conviction in her tone would be sweet, but poor Alison is also very naïve.

  “Even if she does, it won’t sti
ck Ali. He’s a fucking lawyer for Christ’s sake, and I know the slimy shit has already made his connections with bad people. He’s dirty. And even if that wasn’t the case, Ryan is very good at manipulating people—especially our father. If Ryan doesn’t get himself off, our dad will… And then River will be in more danger than she was before.”

  Another wave of frustration surges through me. I want to punch my fist through the steering wheel. It will never seize to amaze me how well Ryan has our parents under his thumb. They think he’s the perfect son—next to me of course because our parents would never pick favorites. But fuck, they really should considering one of their sons is an absolute piece of shit. Ryan will spin some story about how River is manipulative and lying, and just trying to get a piece of the family fortune. And Mom and Dad will believe it.

  I know this because I’ve tried convincing them before that he was beating Alison. I showed them pictures of her injuries and his threatening texts, and when Ryan convinced them they were photoshopped, I went to my colleagues. I went to my boss. Lieutenant Sharp did believe me, but when he started an investigation, it was immediately shut down by his superior. Ryan’s reach was too far—he made too many valuable connections. My claims were buried, and my parents told me to drop it. Alison was lying, that’s all there was to it. Ryan would never do that to a girl—least of all a girl he’s in love with.

  That’s probably our parent’s only flaw—but it’s a flaw that’s endangering lives. They love Ryan too much and Ryan is too good at manipulating people. Abusers don’t only manipulate their victims, but they manipulate others into believing that they’re upstanding people.

  They manipulate them into believing that they would never hurt a fly, so when accusations come to the surface, they’re considered outrageous. These people know Ryan and they know he would never abuse a woman.

  And I don’t know how to fix that anymore. I don’t know how to make my parents—or anyone else—see the light when they believe they’re already seeing it.

  Ryan will never be punished for his crimes unless one of his victims press charges. And with Ryan’s connections, the likelihood of him actually suffering any consequences are low. Ryan’s smart enough not to hit them in public, and he knows how to scare them into silence. He cares more about his reputation than the woman he’s abusing.

  I had pleaded with Alison to press charges—to try. It didn’t matter that I promised her my protection, she was still too scared to speak against Ryan. In the end, nothing came of it and I created a divide in the family. Mom and Dad hold nothing against me, firmly believing that I was naive and was spun into Alison’s wicked web.

  But there’s an underlying tension in the air during family dinners. Deep down, they know I still believe Alison and that bothers them.

  “Then what do you suggest we do, Mako?” Alison snaps, bringing me back to the conversation. “Let him abuse girls as he sees fit? What if he kills someone? We would have known what he’s doing and did nothing about it. That—that’s so fucking wrong and you know it!” She ends her sentence in near hysteria.

  I bang my head against the headrest.

  “I don’t know, Ali. I really don’t. Right now, I’m going to focus on River. Whatever comes after, I’ll figure that out when I get there.”

  Five

  river

  “RIDDLE ME THIS, RIVER. How much force does it take before a bone breaks?” a voice says from behind me. Chills rush over my skin when that deep voice infiltrates my ears. I pause mid-step, nearly tripping over my feet when my foot comes back down clumsily. Immediately, I’m frustrated. I hate that he caught me off guard and I hate that he now knows he did.

  Reluctantly and with a massive amount of irritation, I turn to find Mako, which only heightens my bad mood when I see how sinfully delicious he looks. He’s dressed in black jeans and a black tee shirt, brightening his colorful tattoos. I want to study them closer, ask why he got each and every one of them. You can learn a lot about a person just from their tattoos. But I would never ask—I have as much interest in getting to know Mako as I do getting to know the shark. They’re both perfectly capable of eating me alive.

  The gears in my head are turning overtime as I try to figure out how the hell he found me and why he found me. There’s no way Mako goes to school here. He looks too old—definitely older than Ryan.

  The stalker raises an eyebrow when I continue to stare dumbly. Shaking myself, I feel blood rise to my cheeks.

  “What are you doing here?” I ask, my tone accusing and harsh now that he caught me checking him out.

  Who am I kidding, it would’ve been harsh regardless.

  I had just walked out of my psych class and was heading towards my favorite donut shop. I’m only a block away. It’s not good for my body, and Ryan would be pissed if I gained weight, but I’m especially hungry today.

  At least until Mako showed up. Now, my appetite has vanished completely. Actually, I feel a little sick.

  He smiles. “Getting a donut.”

  Without my permission, my eyes track down his body. He doesn’t look like he eats donuts.

  “Right,” I say doubtfully, and then turn to walk towards the donut shop. I eat donuts. I’m not a liar like he is.

  He falls in step behind me, and my blood heats and chills all at once. A cold, nervous sweat breaks across my brow, even though it’s eighty degrees out.

  What if Ryan sees us? He could easily drive by. The donut shop is only a few blocks from his work. If Ryan spotted Mako walking next to me, there’s no telling how he’d react. He loves me and doesn’t want me around bad influences. One look at Mako, and it’s easy to see he falls under that category.

  “You can’t walk next to me,” I snap, rushing my steps forward. His long legs eat up the little distance I gained in a matter of seconds.

  “Why not?” he asks, though it sounds like he already knows the answer. It sounds like he’s testing me.

  “Because I don’t like you.”

  He hums. “So, are you going to answer me? How much force does it take before a bone breaks?”

  “I don’t know. You’d have to stalk someone with an anatomy degree,” I answer briskly, still attempting to quicken my pace. All I’m accomplishing is getting a workout in before I gorge on sugar and calories.

  “I’ll tell you the answer. It’s not about the force, it’s about their angle of attack. If you’re smart and have a good angle, you can break someone without any effort at all.”

  I stop, and Mako doesn’t miss a beat. He stops next to me, his heat crowding in on me until I’m in danger of a heat stroke. His energy feels like I’m being attacked by a solar flare.

  I turn to him, my eyes narrowed. Anger pulses through me in bright heat waves. If he looked close enough, he’d see it thrumming in my neck.

  “I know what you’re insinuating. Ryan loves me,” I say.

  Why did I sound like a child right there? Instead of smiling in triumph, he frowns.

  “Do you really believe that?” he asks seriously.

  “I do,” I answer with conviction.

  He looks disappointed. Why would he even care? I’m disappointed I care why he cares. Slowly, he nods his head, as if he’s accepting something he just realized.

  “He’s good, I’ll give him that.” When I frown, he clarifies, “He’s broken you so effortlessly, the pain hasn’t even hit you yet.”

  IT’S DATE NIGHT, AND I’ve just spent two hours getting ready. I put on minimal makeup this time and decided to let my outfit do all the shining. I’m wearing a royal blue satin dress, with silver pumps. It makes my golden eyes shine, appearing almost unnatural. I’m quite proud of the invention I’ve made out of myself.

  Ryan’s been sitting on the couch, impatiently waiting for me. I can feel the negative energy through the walls. He’s taking me to an elite restaurant two towns over. Reputation only. Because only people with high social standing get in with a reservation. Anyone off the streets are put on a list, and constantly o
vershadowed by the people of high importance.

  Ryan’s father is one of the best lawyers in the country. Ryan is set to take over Matt’s law firm—even though he’s only twenty-five. No one would dare turn down the only person capable of getting you out of anything. I don’t know how Matt’s carefree personality translates to a fierce lawyer, but somehow, he’s managed to hang onto his morality.

  Ryan, not so much.

  I walk down the grand staircase, veins of black and gold in the pristine marble. Ryan’s waiting in the foyer, the extravagant chandelier hanging above him shrouding him shadows in the otherwise dark house. When he sees me, his eyes slowly rake down my body. A chill works its way down my spine. His stare rivals a vampire’s when they get that first whiff of fresh blood.

  “You look beautiful,” he says softly. An emotion I can’t name flickers in his eyes, gone too quickly before I can figure it out.

  There’s that word again. Beautiful.

  Despite his word choice, my heart flutters, and the biggest smile breaks out across my face. He returns my smile with a sinister grin and holds out a hand for me. I take it without reservation, my excitement growing. He squeezes my hand and leads me to the car.

  The ride there is silent, and a little stiff. I shift, racking my brain for something to say. I hate the mundane talk, but sometimes, I don’t know what else to say. Comfortable silences between Ryan and I are nonexistent lately. Usually when he’s silent, he’s brooding or upset and fills the space with uneasiness. I know I took a little longer than I should’ve getting ready, but I’d hoped he’d think it was worth it after seeing how good I look.

  “I hope you’re hungry. This place has the best food in town,” Ryan announces, though his voice is missing the upbeat excitement it had when he first told me where he was taking me two days ago.