by Robin Roseau
"Don't tell my niece."
"Oh you can tell her. I would just rather you not told anyone else. It may help you to understand, but then you are burdened with a secret."
"I shall carry it with ease," she said. "I am no gossip."
"I am not sure, but it may have been illegal for me to tell Sartine what I told her. I would certainly lose my post here if it were known. Sartine knows the second part, but I didn't tell her the first, and I am not sure if it is illegal or not. I shouldn't have told her. I won't compound my offense by telling you. But her indecision now is entirely justified and not that surprising. No, let me change that. The fact that she hasn't already packed me up and sent me back to Sudden is quite surprising."
"What you said was this horrible?"
"It was to her. It wouldn't have been to me. Think of it this way. I told her something as shocking to her as it was to me to find out I was to become a galatzi prisoner."
"And it took you several weeks to accept."
"I still haven't completely accepted, and I probably won't completely accept." I glanced at the door. "I would not tolerate being locked in this room until I produce a child."
"Does Sartine know that?"
"Oh yes. I was quite clear. You can perhaps imagine."
She smiled. "You would be very, very good for her." She began moving towards the door. "I will return in an hour or so. Do you need anything else?"
"Will you answer questions before you go?"
"Perhaps."
"You do not like me but it seems you are trying to help me. Will you explain?"
"Whatever gave you the impression I don't like you?"
"You seemed quite displeased the night I was taken, and you were not quite so exuberant as the others during Sartine's speech the morning before we crossed the river." I paused. "She invited others to step forward to claim her title. Everyone else said 'no'. You said nothing. Who do you really want as Vendart, Kilarn?"
Her face cleared with my explanation, and then she smiled. "You misinterpreted. I would have no one other. She didn't want this duty, and I am the one who talked her into accepting it. She is young, but she seeks guidance and wisdom. She is an amazing leader."
I thought about that. "Yes," I said. "She is. She has impressed me in how she treats everyone." Then I looked away. "Except she is very inconsistent in how she treats me."
"And then there is you," she said. "You did not realize she wanted you. She made her decision right in front of you in that meeting where we met, but you did not see it."
"No."
"I am almost as much to blame for your situation as her," Kilarn said. "I could have talked her into another choice. Instead, I helped her see her own mind when she faltered. She faltered again on your doorstep. She thought she had your blessing. She thought to find you packed and waiting for us. And it was clear you didn't even understand it was possible for us to take you, much less that was why we were there."
"It has been a long time since I have felt so foolish, once I had all the hints highlighted to me."
"You didn't understand when she and I talked." I shook my head. "I asked her if she wanted you."
"She said 'yes'."
"She did. And then I helped her to decide." She folded her arms. "Are you now angry with my choice? We could have gone away."
"And taken no one?"
"No. We had other, lesser choices. Not for Sartine, but for someone else. We would not have returned home without someone."
"And now?"
"And now, I help to calm this situation," she said. "Do you see?"
I nodded. "I see. Kilarn, I will tolerate this situation for a while, but if this is going to drag out, then I need the boundaries of my symbolic prison widened. If we all know I am not going to attempt to escape, there is no reason I cannot walk the village."
"Perhaps there is no reason for you, but there is a reason for Sartine."
"Oh?"
"She already told you, I understand. She needs to treat you as a galatzi prisoner. If she begins to treat you in any other fashion, then you will know her answer." She paused. "Now, are you about to make demands?"
I lowered my eyes from hers. "No."
She watched me for a few moments then said, "I believe my advice to my niece was sound. I believe you will suit her quite well, once she realizes only one thing matters."
"What is that?"
"She wants you, and you want her."
* * * *
Sartine did not come to me that day. Instead, Kilarn saw to my needs, and if being cooped up was frustrating, I was not abused, and my needs were addressed.
The next day saw no change.
Nor did the next.
And so the next morning, I asked Kilarn to tell Sartine she must come to me that day and give me her answer.
"I cannot tell her that," she said. "She is not here."
"What?"
"She went hunting."
"Hunting?" I screeched. "I am cooped up in here, and she is out hunting?"
"It is something she is doing to help her think," Kilarn said. "She seeks perspective."
"I see." I glowered at Kilarn, although I knew the situation wasn't her fault. "And how long will she be out seeking perspective?"
"She didn't say. Perhaps she will return tomorrow."
"Or perhaps she will be gone a month or two?"
"Oh, no, we'll have snow by then. She'll be back before it snows."
"She is out hunting, enjoying the outdoors, enjoying your mountains, and I am stuck here? This is how she seeks to court me?"
Kilarn said nothing.
"How much authority do you have?" I finally asked her.
"Perhaps you should be more specific with your question."
"If Sartine is out enjoying the mountains, I believe it is only fair if I at least am allowed to roam the village. I require a fresh air."
"Your windows open."
"I require a proper bath and a change of scenery."
"No. You desire a bath and a change of scenery, Cecilia."
"My continued patience with the vendart's inability to make a simple decision requires proper baths, frequent changes of scenery, and exercise."
"You can exercise here."
"I have no intention of working up a sweat to be wiped away with a damp cloth. I require a proper bath afterwards." I looked around pointedly. "I see no facilities for one. Now, do you have sufficient authority to give me what I need, or not?"
"Cecilia, please, a little more time."
"I have given her time. If she hasn't decided by now, she is not going to. Is she?"
"She is deeply conflicted."
"Yes, well. Perhaps when I declare your galatzi custom 'stupid', you understand why I might think so. She shouldn't have taken me if she didn't want me."
"She wants you, Cecilia. You know that."
I folded my arms. "Do you have the authority or not?"
"No."
"Obtain it," I said. "Tomorrow, I will begin to consider the mischief available to me."
"Please, Cecilia!" she pleaded. "Calm down."
"She went hunting," I screamed. "And left me locked in here. She should have taken me with her."
"A few more days aren't going to kill you." She said it calmly, and I recognized the tone an adult would use with a rebellious teenager.
"I could die of boredom," I said.
"At least you can still joke."
"I could die in my attempt to resolve my boredom," I said with a steely expression. "Or someone else could, if she attempted to interfere."
"Did you just threaten me because you're bored?"
"No, I warned you not to get in my way if I decide to leave."
"I cannot allow you to leave this floor of the house," she said. "However, I believe I can arrange a bath."
"Hot?"
"Warm, at least. I do not know if I can achieve hot."
"You would bring a tub?"
"Yes."
"That is a lot of wa
ter to haul."
"Yes. It is a significant amount of work for me and several other people. It would burn a week's worth of wood."
"This is stupid. What harm would fall allowing me to walk across the green to the bath house?"
"Cecilia," she said very slowly. "Do you no longer wish to remain in this galatzi trade?"
I looked away. "I am not there yet, but she needs to come to a decision, and she cannot spend months doing so. No, I do not wish to terminate the agreement. But my ability to remain flexible is strained. I do not suffer boredom well, and that doesn't even consider the question of how insulted I should feel on top of neglected."
"If I allow you to leave -- or if you ask to leave again -- you may as well say you are ending the trade. And while another galatzi prisoner wouldn't be able to end it at this point, as you have pointed out, you are unique."
I turned away and walked to the window, leaning my head against the glass. "For now, I will accept your advice, but my patience will last longer if you can give me something."
"How necessary is the exercise?"
"If this is to last months, it is very necessary. Even if Sartine eventually comes to me and claims me, and I allow her claim, if my body falls too far, I will need to leave for medical treatment."
"You are young," she said. "A few months of idleness will not kill you."
"Believe what you wish," I said. "You asked. That is my answer."
"You can tolerate a few more weeks without the exercise?"
"How difficult is it to bring a tub, several buckets of cold water, and one or two hot?"
"I would do that for you."
"Can you help with the boredom?"
"I cannot take you to the village, but I can take members of the village to you. However, you mustn't talk about these things with them. You must appear pleasant. You must appear as you did the day you arrived, happy to be here. I do not know if you can do that."
I turned around and walked to her. I put on a smile. "I am perhaps a poor diplomat, but I am not so poor as that. Absolutely no one will know of my frustration. If you are able to relieve the boredom and provide the less than optimal bath every few days, I will strive to hold on a little longer. But when Sartine returns, she had better come to see me, or we are done, regardless of whatever decisions she has reached."
Kilarn paused, then she said, "You know, once it snows, you are here until spring, unless your empire flies from the skies for you."
"As you said, I would not die of boredom while I wait. I would, however, grow very, very angry, and it is the sort of anger that sees no forgiveness. I am trying to be ready when Sartine finally makes her decision. Or this decision will revert to become mine." I shrugged. "Keep me entertained, and for now, I will leave it hers. If you want to see my backside at my first opportunity, continue my boredom."
"I do not wish you to leave, Cecilia. I will do as much as I am able."
* * * *
And she did, cautiously at first. She didn't bring my lunch; Belain did, and then the woman spent the afternoon with me. We spent the entire time talking. In the evening, it was Meorid with my dinner, and he offered to stay a few hours. I was amused when he brought in another chair, then a moment later a basket.
"A picnic?"
"The mending," he said.
I stared as he pulled it out and began to repair a broken seam in a light shirt.
"You aren't eating."
"I have only visited a few planets with a technology level similar to Talmon's," I said. "All of the others have reverted to habits from old Earth."
"Such as?"
"Gender roles. The women do the sewing."
He laughed. "Kilarn is hopeless with needle and thread. In spite of the size of my hands, I am not."
And so, I ate. He mended. Afterwards, I took my break in the water closet, and then we talked until late. It was Kilarn who found us, laughing over a story he was telling me, and she joined us for a while.
I hugged them both before they left, and thanked them for coming.
The next day, Halarain brought my breakfast. Relain, the teacher, came in the late afternoon, and she brought the two ancient books with her. I didn't know her by face, but Kilarn came with her for introductions. Relain handed me the books with a great deal of reverence and asked if I could read them.
From the names of the authors, I had expected English. I was surprised to see they were both written in German, and not modern German that I knew, but ancient German from Earth. There was a struggle, but I told her that yes, I could read them, with some difficulty.
She almost cried, right in front of me, and asked me what they were about.
She stayed until long after dinner, and I worked through painfully translating the pages of the books, enough for her to understand. Finally I apologized and told her my head hurt too much to do more that night. She asked if she could bring them back another time, and of course, I agreed.
In the morning, Kilarn came again, bringing my breakfast. She asked if I was feeling better. I thanked her.
"Does the village play games?" I asked. "Perhaps people would like to teach me the games you play. And Meorid did mending when he came. I have never learned to sew. Perhaps he would teach me. Perhaps there are other crafts people would care to teach me. I do not require this, but perhaps it would be fun, and perhaps people would enjoy this time."
"I heard what you told the women in the baths your first day here," she said.
"I talked for a long time. Be more specific."
"About joining The Empire."
"Ah, that. Yes."
"You have duties, and Sartine promised you would be able to do them here. Would teaching you these things help?"
"I don't know what would help with my duties, Kilarn. But teaching me these things would help me fit in later, if Sartine decides to keep me."
"And when she returns and learns you have asked for help fitting in, it may sway her further." She smiled broadly.
It wasn't Meorid who taught me to sew. It was Laradain. She started with very simple things, and then she left me with material and thread and several assignments. "I will be back tomorrow to check. If your stitches are not straight and even, I will do what I once did to the vendart's father."
"What is that?"
"I will make you remove them, stitch by stitch, and do them again and again until you do them correctly."
I laughed, and then I did the best that I could.
And still, Sartine did not return.
They taught me a game they played with cards, and another they played with dice. This was a gambling game, and I had nothing to gamble with. Some of the men offered raucous suggestions, but I firmly said, "My lips are for our vendart, and no one else." And so we played for money they loaned to me but I had to give it all back when they were done.
I'd been ahead, too.
And still, Sartine did not return, and I thought she was giving me my answer, but I didn't know why she didn't return me to Sudden, if she didn't want me.
The next day, Kilarn entered with two women, younger than I was. "Sartine told me you admired the furniture. Metarine and Bellain are two of our carpenters." They brought their tools with them, the portable ones at least, and explained how they worked. But of course, I couldn't visit their workshop, and they didn't want to make a mess of my room, so they couldn't show me too much.
Relain came that afternoon. She didn't bring the old books. Instead, she brought schoolbooks, and she began lessons for me, teaching me the same sorts of things she taught the children. She, too, left me with assignments to do once she left.
Two nights later, Sartine still had not returned, and I learned a drinking game. As soon as I learned the nature of the game, I woke Minerva and told her to process the alcohol that was entering my bloodstream. That she was able to do, and the villagers were quite impressed by my capacity.
Even if it required frequent trips down the hall.
I think they were disappointed they couldn'
t get me drunker than they did. It was particularly amusing to see Kilarn so drunk that she reverted to giggles.
The next morning she was very, very quiet, and when I spoke cheerfully, she begged me to whisper.
I gave her three Ibuprofen from my carefully protected hoard, and after she was gone, I counted the remaining pills.
Two mornings later, Sartine still had not returned, and when Belain brought my breakfast, there was melting snow in her hair. I stared at it for a moment then ran to fling open the windows.
It was snowing.
I turned to her, wordless at first, but finally I said, "Kilarn told me Sartine would be back before it snowed."
"This is just a little snow, hardly anything," she said. "We don't even notice snow like this. Sartine is fine."
"You promise."
"I promise," she said.
And so I collected a little snow from the window sill, turned to her, and stalked her around the bedroom, finally throwing the snowball at her. She shrieked and laughed. She stayed until Laradain came at lunch and more sewing lessons. For dinner, Belain returned, and she wasn't alone. She and three other of the village women stepped into my bedroom. They all had their hands behind their backs.
"One," Belain said. "Two." And at about two and a half, their hands all appeared, each with a snowball. "Three!"
They all launched at once, three of the four snowballs hitting me squarely, here and there.
I squealed in surprise, then picked up some of the snow, and the four of us chased each other around the bedroom. I got snow down my back, but so did Belain.
"You are from Sudden," she said after we had both dried out a little. "But you know what to do with a snowball."
"I am not from Sudden," I said. "I am from Centos Four. But I should show you something."
I had been using my tablet very cautiously, as two days of charging only netting me about an hour of use. None of them had even seen it, except Belain when she packed it. I found the skiing video and then showed it to the four of them.
"That's you?" Maratine asked. "Skiing?"
I laughed. "If I hadn't shown this video to the vendart, she may not have taken me, thinking I couldn't handle the snow."
* * * *
A week later, Sartine had still not returned, and I was beginning to grow angry with her, but I told no one.
