“I don’t know for sure. All I’ve seen are the sandy shores and cliffs bordering the bay. I think I did see the shadows of some trees on the north side one time, but they were too far away to be sure.”
I ponder him for a moment. “So this might all be for naught? There might be nothing out there. We might just be running to our deaths?” The moment the words were out of my mouth I regret saying them as the other girls gasp in horror.
“Which would you rather? Death as a slave, or as a free person?” Link pierces me with a direct and steady gaze. When I blink, he returns to his post at the craft’s controls.
Sol approaches. “You had all better try and get some sleep. It will be a few hours before we get to the other shore and then we need to put as much distance between us and the bay as we can in case the Emperor’s men are already on our trail.”
“Sleep? It seems like we just woke up.”
“We did. Apparently the Emperor set Imram to night when it was actually daylight out so there would be no one to see the fishermen go out and return each day with their catch. He wanted no one but the officials to know he was harvesting shellfish from the bay in order to keep up the guise that the world was no longer habitable. Try to sleep now, you’ll need every ounce of strength you have come daylight.”
As he returns to stand beside Link, I can only wonder what daylight will bring. Will the rift between us disappear with the coming light, or will it only be more visible? As I lay down in the boat looking up at the stars and the swollen moon, my mind wanders back to the first night Sol and I made love on the Emperor’s rooftop. It’s funny how I thought the simulated sky and night perfect back then. It seems so long ago and so fake now, even the live flowers on the roof top under the artificial sky. The flowers on the roof top had been for me. Were they an attempt to make what I thought Sol and I shared real?
A tear trickles down my cheek. What will happen to my parents and Petie? Will I ever see my family again? Will the Emperor make them pay for my escape? Have I made a mistake? Have I been so eager to see what used to be that I sacrificed my family for something which might only be wishful thinking, a barren waste land? What have I done?
A squeal from behind jars me from my thoughts. We turn around. In the second boat a concubine stands, pointing at the sky above Imram. An impossibly large, blood red moon hangs there. A chill that has nothing to do with the cool night air steals down my spine.
“What is it?” Danika whispers.
Link looks over his shoulder. “It’s a blood moon.”
Wails of fear echo back and forth between the two boats. Surely this isn’t a terrible omen of things to come?
Danika huddles closer. “I’m afraid, Ocean. What if we made a huge mistake?”
In mute horror I digest her words. What if we have?
* * *
Though I can’t believe it, I must have drifted off because when I next open my eyes the boat is slowing. It’s still dark, only a band of lighter blue on the horizon giving evidence of the coming dawn. The shrill call of a small bird and the damp chill of the air make me shiver. Squinting, I can make out a lighter band of land before us.
“Wake up everyone, it is time to get walking.” Sol climbs from the boat and offers his hand.
After a slight hesitation ,I place my hand in his warm grip. The boat rocks, throwing me off balance when I get out and with a squeak I clutch Sol’s arm. He wraps the other around my waist to steady me. “Sol, I...”
“No problem.” He releases me and reaches to help the next girl. “Hurry now, we want to clear the beach before the sun rises.”
With an inward wince, I make my way across the sand after two enforcers, Dr. White and the secretary. Why is Sol still angry? He has no reason to be. As I stomp along behind, my annoyance grows. I did nothing wrong. How dare he make me feel guilty for something I had no control over?
“Ocean?” Dr. White drops back to walk beside me. “You’re awfully quiet.”
“I’m not awake yet.”
His soft grunt tells me he doesn’t believe my excuse. “Is something bothering you?”
“You’re not my psychologist anymore, remember?”
He chuckles. “No, I am not, but I’m still your friend.”
“Thanks.” We carry on in silence for a while.
Dr. White clears his throat. “I never introduced you to my wife.”
“Your wife?” I look up from the sand. “I didn’t know you were married.”
He gestures to the receptionist walking beside him. “This is Elaina.”
“I am so pleased to meet you, Ocean, there were so many times I wanted to talk to you, but, well... it was just too risky.”
I’m not in the mood for kind chit chat, but I banish my irritation. “Thanks for the birth control device, I hear you are responsible for obtaining them.”
“It was the least I could do.”
We walk in awkward silence for a while until we reach a steep sandy knoll. Dr. White glances over at me as we climb, his breathing coming in little gasps. “It’s not over, you know, Ocean. This is just the beginning.”
“The beginning of what?” I study his shadowed face.
“The beginning of a mighty revolution.”
I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help laughing. “A revolution? With what, sticks and stones? What if there is nothing out here, Dr. White? What if this was all for nothing? I left my family back there at the Emperor’s mercy.”
“It’s Stanley.”
“What?”
He cracks a smile. “My name is Stanley.”
“Oh.” I carry on until we reach the top of the knoll. “Well, Stanley, what are we going to do if there is nothing out here, if you are wrong about the whole apocalypse being nothing but a sham? We can’t go back...” My voice trails off as I crest of the hill and look out upon the land beginning to brighten under the new sun. “I can’t believe it.”
In that momentous moment, my eyes feast upon the thing I’ve dreamed of every night in the hub. Green blades of grass sway in the breeze as far as the eye can see, studded with yellow, white and red flowers. Here and there, birds dip in the sky, singing praises to the rising sun. Orange and black butterflies dance from bloom to bloom. Great trees with scared trunks and leafy branches reaching to the sky dot the meadow, beyond which purple mountains dusted with white caps are visible. “I can’t believe it. Pinch me Dr. White. I must be dreaming... On second thought, don’t wake me, I want to stay dreaming forever.”
“Ow!” His pinch startles me and I jump, rubbing the red mark left behind on my arm. Movement in the meadow catches my attention. A delicate reddish brown creature pauses mid-step and turns its head. Large ears flick back and forth as it fixes its liquid brown eyes on us. Without warning, it’s off with a wave of its bushy white tail, bounding over the meadow until it disappears in a fringe of trees.
I’m not aware I was holding my breath until its whoosh marks the creature’s leaving. “What was that beautiful creature?”
Stanley sighs. “That was a deer. If they still exist so must much of the world as I remember it.”
The awe in his voice matches my own sense of wonderment. For the first time I appreciate that the doctor and I are not so different. We both long for the old world, he for the one he remembers and I for the one I don’t.
Sol waves for us to continue. “We must keep moving.” Then he turns and trudges ahead at a steady pace. Perhaps I should catch up with him and try and start a conversation... No. There will be time when we stop for the night; right now all I want to do is soak in the enchanting world around me.
By the time the sun is high in the sky, my feet are aching. I swipe at the sweat beading my brow. There is little walking to be done in the hub and all of it on flat cement surfaces. Nothing prepares me for the sharp rocks, sticks, stones, uneven ground and hilly terrain we now cross. When my stomach rumbles, I find myself wishing for the first time for one of the hub’s bland tofu meal trays. When we finally reach the f
orest that lies before the purple mountains, Sol calls a halt. We girls flop down in the shade of the forest pines.
With a moan, Ashley pulls off a now dingy white shoe. “I can’t go any further.”
After removing my own shoes, I scowl at the ugly, weeping blisters marring my heels. “I’m starving. What I wouldn’t do for a bowl of that flavorless custard Petie hates so much.”
Ashley sighs. “Me too.”
Danika sinks down beside us. “What do you think is going to happen to them?”
Fear settles into the pit of my stomach like a cold, hard rock. “I don’t know. I will never forgive myself for running away if the Emperor hurts them.”
Danika squeezes my hand. “We didn’t have a choice not to go, Ocean.”
“Didn’t we?” I take in the meadow before us. “Two of the girls were left behind, we could have stayed.”
“And bear the brunt of the Emperor’s wrath?” Ashley shakes her head. “No way, I would have found a way to slit my own throat.”
I shiver at the thought. How can I refute that? It isn’t as if the thought hasn’t crossed my mind either, though I was better off than them, I had Sol... but now? I steal a look at him as he talks with the group of enforcers deciding which direction to head. Maybe I don’t have him anymore. Have I thrown away a future as the emperor’s wife for a love so fickle it didn’t last beyond Imram’s walls?
Elaina approaches. “I see you are all in need of some medical attention.” She crouches beside me and pulls a small tin from her pack. After removing the lid she applies a thick clear paste to each of our feet. The substance stings at first, but soon the coolness soothes our feet. “I’m sorry we can’t rest, or go slower to avoid the blisters.”
“Do you think the Emperor knows where we are?”
She nods. “I am sure of it. You see, the boats have trackers on them that can’t be disabled unless the boat is destroyed. The emperor knows we made land and I’m sure he will have men on our trail.”
Ashley whimpers. “I don’t want to be dragged back to Imram.”
I’m reminded of the many who disappeared over the years never to return and a shudder runs down my spine. “If the emperor’s men find us they won’t risk returning us alive to Imram where we might tell of all we have seen out here.” Danika’s gulp gives me pause and I regret being so forthright.
A pall settles over the group as we rest. Our joy at finally being free is tempered by all that could befall us and the families we left behind.
* * *
By the time we cross the meadow, the sun is high in the sky and the air hot and humid. Sweat trickles between my breasts and I itch at them as the crusty cloth of my robe sticks to my skin. The shade of the forest is welcoming and an audible collective sigh goes up from all as we enter it. Sol has taken to scouting ahead and another enforcer lags behind to watch the trail. So far it doesn’t seem like we are being followed. Before long we find a narrow trail through the bush and shuffle along single file. A few minutes into the journey Sol drops back to the group relinquishing his leadership to Link.
He fells in behind me. “I’m sorry.”
Even though I’d like to ignore him I can’t. “What for?”
“I shouldn’t have reacted that way in the hub.”
Squaring my shoulders, I glance behind at him. “You made me feel like I had a choice, like I enjoyed what happened.”
“I know.” He looks down. “I’m sorry. I... I thought I could handle it.”
“Me too.”
We walk in silence for a while. “So... where do we go from here?”
Coming to a halt I swing around to face him. “Can we go back to before this all happened, to that first night on the roof top?”
With a smile, he begins to sing, “The flowers on the rooftop were for you.”
Crossing to him I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him. “I love that song.”
“I wrote it for you.”
Twining our fingers together we walk on amidst knowing glances.
Sol squeezes my hand. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when you needed me.”
“You’ve always been there for me, Sol.”
Footsteps running on the path behind draw our attention. The enforcer elected to trail behind and watch our back jogs up. “Enforcers just breached the meadow, maybe an hour behind us at the most.”
The news spreads up the line of girls to the leaders in front and the call is given to pick up the pace. My shoe rubbing against the weepy blisters on my feet makes me wince, but I suck it up. Picking up a limping gait, I jog behind the rest of the group while Sol sprints ahead to help scout the best course through the forest. Small creatures startled by our flight flee in our wake. Tiny bushy tailed rodents who chirp at us scamper up tree trunks and long eared bundles of brown fur hop out from under foot. There is no time to wonder about the creatures, nor to be afraid of them. Before long we come to a creek that snakes across the path. The babbling of the crystal clear water over the rocks is like nothing I’ve ever heard before. Sun glistens off the surface, almost blinding me as we exit the canopy of the trees to stand on the bank.
One of the enforcers kneels on the bank and dips his hand in the water. After raising it to his mouth he sniffs and then takes a tentative sip. A grin rides his lips as he addresses the group. “I taste or smell no foulness. Drink up.”
Once everyone has their fill and the few flasks the enforcers carry are full, Stanley motions for us to wade into the water. “We will walk down stream in the creek. The emperor’s men can follow our tracks through the forest, but not in the water.”
The girls gasp when they do as they are told and the icy water climbs to their knees when they wade into the middle of the creek. Though it is the coldest I’ve ever experienced I can’t deny the relief it gives my throbbing feet. Navigating the slippery rocks however, is no easy feat. More than a few of us slip and fall, soaking our clothing and enforcers come to our rescue. Our dingy white robes now cling to our bodies, almost see through and hiding little. Despite this and the posse on our trail we giggle and splash each other here and there, lending a light hearted feel to our plight which we need at this point. Spirits high, we make good progress down the creek. By the time our feet are numb from the cold, Link motions to return to journeying on land. Refreshed, we cross the rocky shore and then back into the cover of the forest.
One by one our steps stumble and when exhaustion begins to claim our good natured frisking Stanley declares a halt. Weary, we collapse where we can in a small clearing while a group of enforcers disappear into the brush.
Sol comes to sit beside me. “The man watching our back trail said the emperor’s men crossed the creek and continued through the woods. We’ve lost them for now.”
“Where did the others go?”
“They went to find food.”
“Food? Out here?” My stomach rumbles, cramping from lack of nourishment for a whole day.
“Link’s father used to be a trapper. He taught him as a boy to hunt, trap and fish.”
I ponder the idea. “What will he hunt?”
“Rabbits, squirrels...whatever he comes across.”
“Won’t the flash of the Tasers alert the emperor’s men of our whereabouts?”
Sol grins. “He won’t Taser the animals.”
“Then how will he kill them?” I grit my teeth. Why am I drawn to ask such a morbid question? Then it dawns on me, I’ve heard of contraband weapons before. No one is supposed to have a gun in Imram, not even the enforcers. “Link has a gun?”
“Yes, but that would draw the enforcers on our trail.” Sol gives me a twisted smile. “Do you really want to know, Ocean?”
I open my mouth and then reconsider. No, I really don’t want to hear about death, or the means to an animal’s end. Death and endings occupy too much of all our thoughts of late.
When Link returns an hour later, he packs half a dozen furry and feathered creatures. Even though it seems morbid I can’t conta
in my curiosity and approach him. “What are they?”
Link sets them before me on the ground. “These very soft ones here with the long ears are rabbits and the feathered ones are grouse, kind of like a wild chickens.”
I reach out to touch the rabbits. Their fur is soft beneath my fingertips. “Did they suffer to become our meal?”
“No, I pride myself in dispatching them quick and painlessly.”
Glancing at the large man’s bulging muscles, I don’t doubt his claim. “Life in the hubs was gentler in some ways.”
“Not for some of us.”
I study him for a moment. He is probably ten years or so my senior despite his youthful appearance, yet his eyes are old with pain. “Did you ever...”
“Kill someone?” He lifts an eyebrow. “Yes. It was my job.”
There is no denying my fear at his words, yet some part of me sympathizes with him. We all did things we didn’t want to at the Emperor’s whim, didn’t we? “I will leave you to your... hunting.”
When I turn to leave he places a hand on mine. “223? I will fight to the death to keep them from taking any of us back.”
I muster a grim smile. “My name is Ocean, I am not a number anymore.”
He dips his head in acknowledgement when I step away.
I am not a number anymore. I am Ocean Delany and I am free. Looking up into the canopy of branches I speak to everyone, yet no one in particular. “I am Ocean Delany and I’m free.”
Chapter Twenty-eight
The days pass in a new routine. We rise at dawn and munch berries and roots Link finds to break our fast. We walk until noon, often playing and teasing each other in good spirits. After a short break, more berries and water, we trudge under the hot afternoon sun, a much more solemn group. By the time the sun begins to kiss the horizon we drop as a weary and foot sore bunch, while Link and some of the other enforcers hunt for meat to cook over the fire. It’s not much of a routine, but since our lives have been rigid schedules as long as most of us can remember, we find it comforting.
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