by Sj Hooks
"No! Please don't go. You aren't messing up anything—I want you here."
"Stephen," she sighed. "Your parents just heard me come, for fuck's sake. I can't have lunch with them. There's no way."
"You don't have to. Come back later. Please?"
She looked at me for what seemed like a really long time and finally nodded. I breathed out in relief and pulled her against my chest.
"I'm so sorry," I whispered. "I completely forgot that I was having lunch with them today. I never meant to put you in that position, I swear."
"Well, at least they didn't see the other positions you put me in," she said, motioning to the bed with a half-smile. I was extremely relieved that she was able to joke at a time like this and that she didn't seem angry about my monumental screwup.
"Are you ready?" I asked, wondering if I was.
"Believe me, if you had a fire escape I would so be climbing out of your window to get out of this," she groaned. "Yeah, let's go."
I looked at her and realized that this was a horrible idea. With her short skirt, band T-shirt, and loose hair, Julia looked like a teenager. And I felt like a dirty old man. With her dressed like this, my parents wouldn't see the strong, smart woman I loved. They would see a seemingly impressionable girl who was sleeping with her professor. This could only end badly. But before I could say anything, she opened the door and walked out of the bedroom with a determined look on her face. I had no choice but to follow her.
My mother and Rich were talking in hushed voices in the living room and Julia's face lit up, seeing the possibility of undetected escape. Then, of course, my parents walked out of the room and almost bumped into us.
I stared at my parents and they stared at Julia. My mother looked somewhere between horrified and shocked. My stepfather looked somewhere between shocked and…proud?
I cleared my throat and their eyes snapped to me. My mother looked like she was ready to keel over and my stepfather was wearing just a hint of a smirk on his face that I really didn't understand.
"Mom. Rich. I'd like you to meet Julia," I said.
"It's, uh, nice to meet you," Julia said hesitantly. Neither of them responded, but finally my stepfather recovered enough to remember his manners.
"It's nice to meet you, too," he said warmly, reaching out his hand. Julia stuck hers out, only to yank it back and hide it behind her back, looking down. A few awkward seconds followed before I remembered that Julia hadn’t had a chance to wash her hands after having sex. Neither had I, for that matter.
Oh, shit! We should have tied some sheets together and escaped through the bedroom window!
My stepfather elbowed my mother discreetly to bring her out of her trance.
"Yes, nice to meet you," she said, with absolutely no warmth in her voice while she glared at Julia.
Thanks, Mom!
"I should get going. Excuse me," Julia mumbled and practically ran toward the hallway.
"Stephen," my mother said.
"Julia, wait," I called and followed her. She was already halfway out the door with her sneakers untied on her feet, clutching her jacket.
"Wait, wait," I said, wrapping my arms around here. She sighed and wouldn't meet my eyes.
"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I just can't really deal with anything family-related right now."
"It's OK," I assured her, kissing the top of her head. "You'll be back later, right?"
Please come back.
"I have no choice," she said and gave me a small smile. "You're keeping my laptop and books hostage, remember?"
I returned the smile. "Do you want me to get them? Do you need them?"
"I could use my laptop," she admitted. "I thought I’d just go to a Starbucks and work on my paper for a little while."
"I'll go get it. Wait here, OK?"
She nodded, bending to lace her shoes, and I walked back inside to get her computer from my office. My parents were talking quietly in the living room again and when I passed by, they stopped immediately. I got Julia's messenger bag and put her laptop and a few books that she’d been using in it and passed my parents again on my way out back to her in the hallway. Now they were silent. Frighteningly so.
Back in the hallway, I handed Julia her bag. “Here you go. I kept a few of your books just to be on the safe side."
She didn't smile.
"You know I was just kidding, right?" I asked. "I mean, I won't force you to come back if you don't want to."
She shook her head lightly and surprised me by initiating a hug.
"I want to stay here with you," she said. "I just feel a little guilty about leaving you to face the firing squad alone."
I felt a huge sense of relief hearing that she did still want to stay. And sitting down with my parents after everything they had probably heard wasn't something I was about to subject her to.
"You should go," I encouraged, rubbing her shoulder. She was unbelievably tense and I understood just how uncomfortable and anxious this whole situation with my parents made her. The fact that she was reluctant to leave my side despite her level of discomfort made my heart jump. I couldn't interpret it in any other way than that she must care for me as well. She still seemed hesitant to go and it made me feel warm all over.
"Julia, you should go and relax," I said softly. "Have some coffee and maybe a cigarette."
She gave me an incredulous look, raising her eyebrows. "Now you're encouraging me to smoke?"
"It relaxes you," I said with a shrug. "Just have some chewing gum or something afterward. I want to kiss you a lot when you come back."
"Is that so?" She smiled. "When did you become so bold and demanding?"
"I have no idea," I admitted. "But I like it."
"Mmm. I do, too." She stood up on her toes and kissed me gently. I sighed and wrapped my arms around her, wanting more of her. After a few seconds I pulled back and kissed her lips softly three times.
I. Love. You.
I wished that I could tell her with words, but I was convinced that it would only hurt my chances of becoming Julia's boyfriend. I had to tread carefully around her, even though I was dying to say those words out loud. We were making so much progress and I wasn't about to jeopardize that.
I picked up her bag and opened the door for her. "Come back to me soon," I said, unable to stop myself.
"I will. And I'll bring you a cookie," she said with a smile. "You might need something sweet after…that," she added, looking behind me toward the living room.
"I just need you to come back.”
"Are you saying that I'm sweeter than a cookie?"
"You're sweeter than anything or anyone," I said, holding her face between my hands.
"Oh,” she whispered, looking a bit anxious.
Oh God, have I said too much?
I tried to mask my mistake by leaning down to kiss her again. She kissed me back immediately, moaning and pressing herself against me.
"I'll be back soon," she whispered. "I'll miss you."
Before I could respond, she hurried out the door and down the street. I stood stunned, letting her remark linger.
She'll miss me.
When I couldn't see her anymore, I closed the door and took a deep breath. Time to face the music.
My parents were standing in the living room when I walked in. I had no idea what to say to them. What on earth do you say when your parents have just walked in on you having loud, incredible sex in the next room?
Awkwardly, I bent down and picked up Julia's shirt and bra, resisting the urge to hide them behind my back.
"So that's the reason you turned down Lily," my mother said.
That's what she's choosing to focus on? Lily, the blind date she set up for me?
"Yes," I said, seeing no point in lying about it.
"What are you doing, Stephen?" she asked. "That girl looks young enough to be one of your students."
My face flushed and my mother narrowed her eyes. Then her mouth popped open and she took a step back.
/>
"You didn't. Tell me she isn't one of your students, Stephen."
"I can't," I said weakly.
"Stephen!" she yelled. "How could you be so stupid? What about your career? What about ethics? Your life could be ruined if someone finds out!"
"You think I don't know that?" I shouted back. "You think I was planning on this?"
"Honestly," my mother scoffed. "This is the kind of thing I would have expected from Matt. What are you doing with her?"
"Well, she's obviously very beautiful," my stepfather remarked under his breath. My mother looked ready to kill him.
"Men!" she growled. "Is that all you can think about? Stephen, you need to end this. Right now! She can't stay here with you anymore."
"Excuse me?" I said slowly. "Last time I checked, I was a grown man and this is my house."
"You can't actually defend shacking up with her," my mother protested. "There are things that are more important than…that.” She made a face and pointed toward my bedroom. "You can't let your life be ruined by a little—”
"Careful," I growled. I wouldn’t let her refer to Julia as anything unpleasant. My mother sighed and scrubbed her face with her hands.
"I'm sorry," she said, looking up at me. "I'm sure she's a lovely girl, but you can't have her staying here with you. Don't you see that?"
"Listen to me!" I thundered, feeling extremely angry and wanting to defend the woman I loved. "Julia just buried her grandfather, her last remaining family member. She has to take care of everything surrounding his death by herself, and she has finals to worry about. She needs me, and I want to take care of her! She's the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I'm just trying to make things a little easier on her. She can stay here for as long as she wants, and that's final!"
I took a deep breath. "And she is a lovely girl. And yes, she’s also my student. But my final class is tomorrow, and then the semester is over. There's no conflict after that." I drew another calming breath.
"Look. I know that you're just worried about me, but she needs me right now. She's all alone, Mom. Her parents are dead and she doesn't have any siblings. She's been taking care of her grandfather and now he's gone, too. I'm not letting her face all that alone."
My mother's features had softened considerably during my monologue and now she looked sad.
“I’ve never been good with girls,” I admitted, wringing Julia’s shirt between my hands. “Not with any of it. It was always so difficult for me, figuring them out and knowing what to say. You know that, Mom.” I could tell she was about to disagree, so I kept on talking. “You know. I’ve never had a girlfriend. Ever.”
Reluctantly, my mother nodded her head.
“And now I’ve met this girl, and she’s everything. I didn’t think we’d fit together but we do. And she likes me.”
“And it’s not difficult for you now?” Rich asked. “Being with her, I mean? Figuring it out?”
I smiled. “It still is at times. But it’s worth it. She’s worth it. And now an awful thing has happened to her, so how could I not invite her to stay?”
"Poor girl,” my mother sighed. “You said she was taking care of her grandfather?"
I sat down on the couch, feeling tired after my long outburst. "Yes, he had Alzheimer's. It was very hard on her."
"I'm so sorry," my stepfather offered. "Please give Julia our condolences."
"Thank you, I will."
"So you're really serious about her?" he asked.
"Yes. Absolutely.”
"How old is she?" he asked curiously. My mother made a sound and rolled her eyes at him.
"Twenty-two.”
"Well, at least she's legal," my mother muttered. I shot her a look.
"Sorry," she said, sitting down on the opposite end of the couch. "This is something of a shock."
"It was for me, too," I said. "I've never met anyone like her before and I never expected to fall for her."
"And does she feel the same way about you?"
"I don't know," I admitted. "Julia is very…gun-shy about relationships. I'm trying to win her over."
"I'm sure us barging in on you didn't help," Rich said. "I'm really sorry. We heard…uh, noises. It sounded like—"
"Please don't say anything else!" The last thing I needed was my stepfather giving me a description of said “noises.”
"Sorry.”
"If you're really serious about her, I want to meet her again," my mother said in a very determined voice.
Oh no.
"I…I really don't think that's the best idea.”
"Stephen, I wasn't exactly polite to her before. I want to change that," she said. "You can bring her over for the Fourth of July."
"She won't go," I said immediately.
"I'm sure she will if you ask her nicely," my mother said, as if the matter were resolved. "Or you can give me her number and I'll invite her myself."
"No!" I half-yelled. "I'll ask her."
I will?
"Good," she said with a smile. "We should get going. We can have lunch another time. I'm sure the two of you will want to be alone right now. Richard?"
She stood up and when she wasn’t looking, my stepfather grinned at me. I followed them out and my mother gave me a hug.
"Take care, dear," she said and kissed my cheek. "Give Julia my best."
"Uh, I will," I said, completely shocked by the turn of events.
"See both of you on the Fourth, son," my stepfather said with a smirk as they walked out. I had almost closed the door when I heard Richard laugh in the distance.
"I told you the boy wasn't gay. Pay up, dear!"
Oh my God. My own mother!
I shut the door, resting my forehead against the cool glass. How on earth was I going to invite Julia to my parents' formal garden party without scaring her away completely?
Is it too early for a drink?
Chapter 4
I spent the two hours after my parents left trying to find a good way to ask Julia to go to their Fourth of July party. Not surprisingly, I came up empty. Going to my parents' house for a party would definitely move our relationship beyond that of sex-buddies and dangerously close to boyfriend/girlfriend. I wanted us to belong to the latter category more than anything, but I wasn't sure if this was the right time to take such a monumental step forward. Julia was already stressing about finals and grieving for her grandfather. I feared that something like this might be too much for her to handle. And yet I wanted nothing more than to enter my parents' house with her hand in mine, showing the world—or at least my family—that she was with me and I was with her.
My phone beeped.
Is the coast clear? :)
I wrote back immediately.
Yes, come home!
I realized too late that I had just referred to my apartment as “home” and hoped that it wasn't too much for her.
I'll be there in ten minutes with cookies and a kiss for you.
That has got to be the best text message ever written.
My heart pounded with excitement and I could hardly sit still while I waited for her to return to me. When I heard the front door open, it made me ridiculously happy all over again. She didn't knock or ring the bell, but simply walked in as if she truly lived here with me.
I jumped up and met her in the hallway where she was hanging up her jacket. She only had time to put her messenger bag on the floor before I was all over her, kissing her like I hadn't seen her in days rather than hours. She threw her arms around my neck and kissed me back just as passionately until we had to pull apart to breathe.
"Wow," she panted into my neck. "That's quite a welcome."
"I missed you," I whispered.
"I missed you, too.” She took my hand and led us into the living room where we sat on the couch.
"So," she said, and pulled out a takeout bag of cookies for me. "Does your mom hate me for corrupting her son?"
"No!" I said immediately. "No, not at all."
Sh
e raised her eyebrows at me. "Really?"
"Richard was a little…proud, I think," I said, fidgeting with the bag.
She laughed and shook her head. "He sounds pretty cool. He’s your stepfather, right?
I nodded.
“I hope you don’t mind that I called them your parents.”
“Well, they are,” I said. “I mean, Rich has been around for almost as long as I can remember. And Matt, of course.”
“I can see the resemblance. They’re both pretty outgoing, aren’t they?”
“Definitely.”
“And your dad?” she asked. “What was he like?”
I thought for a moment. What could I tell her? Most of my knowledge came from what my mom had told me. My memories of him were hazy, like a dream, and I wasn’t sure if most of them were real or imagined anymore.
“He was like me, I guess,” I finally said. “Or I’m like him, I suppose. That’s what my mom says, anyway.” I pointed to my record collection and the player across the room. “Those were his. And a lot of my books as well. I don’t remember him that clearly, but when I listen to his albums or read something he liked…it’s like knowing him in a way.”
Julia nodded, drawing a breath. “That’s really nice,” she whispered. “That you’ve kept so much of his stuff and you use it so often.”
“Did you, ah, do the same? With your parents, I mean?” I asked carefully.
She shook her head. “I would have,” she said. “But they died in a house fire. Our house. There wasn’t much left, so…”
“I’m—I’m so sorry. Julia, that’s… God, I’m so sorry.” Not sure what else to do, I threw my arms around her, holding her tightly. She had been through so much for someone so young, and I wanted nothing more than to somehow shield her from the cruelty of the world. No wonder she was usually so closed off. I couldn’t imagine losing both my parents like that, so suddenly. I still had my mom, and she rebuilt our family, giving me not only a loving stepfather but a stepbrother as well.
Julia sighed, leaning into my embrace. “I’m OK,” she said. “Can we talk about something else, please?”
