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Isaiah tucks the rest of his sandwich in the bag and places it on the hood of the car. I still hold the bagel and it becomes that obvious thing in my hand that I don’t know what to do with. Nerves have tightened my throat, making finishing it impossible, but there’s no way I’m trashing it. Isaiah brought it for me.
Playing mind reader, Isaiah holds out his hand. “It’ll stay warm in the bag. ” I hand the bagel to him and he asks, “So what are you trying to tell me?”
Why couldn’t I have just been happy eating the bagel? “I’m complicated. ”
He shrugs like it’s no big thing. “So am I. ”
“No. ” My fingers close into a fist. “My family is really, really. . . ” Messed up. “Complicated. ”
“You told me that,” he says. “At my apartment. ”
Yeah, I did.
“Are you in danger at home?” he asks.
“No,” I answer immediately. “They just expect a lot. . . from me. ”
He nods like he gets it. “Will seeing me be a problem?”
While there’s this overwhelming voice screaming yes in the back of my mind, there’s a smile twisting on my face and I bring my hands together in front of me, feeling suddenly shy. Did he just say. . . ? “So we’re seeing each other?”
Isaiah touches an earring. “Yeah. I guess we are. ”
My head bobs back and forth because I so need more. “Like more than friends?”
“We can be friends if you want. But. . . ”
“But what?” My stomach begins to plummet. Did I misread all of this?
His gray eyes bore into mine with an intensity I’ve never seen from anyone before. “But I want more. ”
“More?” I whisper.
“I want to kiss you again. ”
A heat wave crashes into my body and I tug at the collar of my winter coat. I could take this thing off and probably still sweat. The memories of his mouth moving against mine and how his hands pressed into my body flood my brain. I lick my lips in anticipation. I crave for him to kiss me again, but. . . “Are you going to call me after?”
A small grin plays on his lips. “You aren’t going to cut me any slack, are you?”
It’s like he’s begging me to tease him, and without thought, I slide back to the braver girl at the bar. “Is that a problem?”
He shakes his head. “Not from you. ”
Isaiah pushes off his car and invades my personal space. His dark scent envelops me and my heart literally trips several times as it tries to continue to beat. Even though he doesn’t touch me, it’s like Isaiah is everywhere. Only centimeters separate us, but his warmth surrounds me like a bubble.
I have to force myself to lift my chin to look at him. His gray eyes soften, and there’s this playful aura to him, accompanied by a devious tilt of his mouth.
“I feel like a mouse with you,” I whisper. “The one that’s already been caught by the cat. ”
That’s when he touches me. Isaiah runs his hand through my hair, and every cell in my body vibrates with the gentle pull. “Rachel. ”
“Yes. ” It’s hard to breathe.
“Kiss me. ”
Isaiah doesn’t wait for my answer. Instead his lips meet mine and his arms wrap around my body. All the hesitancy I felt the first night we kissed evaporates like mist on the heels of a summer storm. Within seconds, our mouths open, and Isaiah slips his tongue against mine. I get lost, liking the way my body curves around his, liking the way my hands explore as if they have a mind of their own, and loving how Isaiah grips my hair while tracing my spine.
Tingles and shock waves and earthquakes and hurricanes. All of it takes place at the same time as our mouths move not nearly fast enough. Nothing seems fast enough. The closer I become, the closer Isaiah presses, and the more he presses, the more I want to crawl inside and live in this delicious world of warmth and fantastic hunger.
Isaiah hooks an arm around my waist, and I suck in a breath when he turns us and shifts me up against the door to his Mustang. My eyes widen and I stare up at him as he stares down at me. Our chests move in unison, as do our breaths. My fingers curl into the muscles of his arms, and I briefly close my eyes, loving how his body fits into mine.
As much as I love it. . . this is so, so new. “That was a pretty awesome second kiss. ”
“I agree. How about a third?”
I giggle, and that rare genuine smile spreads across his face.
“How about we try out our third kiss somewhere other than my school’s parking lot?”
Isaiah rubs that sensitive spot on my shoulder right near the curve of my neck. “I think that sounds like a plan. ”
I glance over at the main parking lot and note that cars have begun to fill the first few rows. As much as I wish this moment could last forever, it can’t. Especially when I have two brothers who would lose their minds if they caught me like this with Isaiah. “I don’t know what to do about my family. ”
“You like me, right?”
I nod.
“That’s all that matters. Let’s figure this out, pay off Eric, and then we’ll tackle the rest. ”
The blood drains from my face at the mention of Eric and I slip my hands down from his shoulders to wrap around his stomach.
As if knowing that Eric haunts me, Isaiah brings his arms around me, creating this protective blanket. I rest my head on his solid chest and listen to the sound of his heart. I could get very used to this.
After a few seconds, Isaiah kisses the top of my head. “I’ll keep you safe. ”
“I trust you. ” I regretfully slide away. “You’re going back to school, right?”
“Yeah. ” Isaiah pulls out the bagel and I take it as the need to bounce again returns. “Go on to class, Rachel. One of us shouldn’t break all the rules. ”
“I think I’m a rule breaker,” I say. “I mean, I did drag race. ”
Isaiah chuckles. “You’re gangster for sure. ”
With a silly smile plastered on my face, I retrieve my backpack from the passenger side of my car and wave at Isaiah before walking away.
Midway across the student lot, my phone rings, and I have to juggle the bagel in order to reach it before the call goes to voice mail. Quickly swallowing a piece, I answer. “Hello?”
“Hey, Rachel?” Isaiah says.
I spin around and in the distance I can spot him leaning against his car again. “Yes?”
“I called. ”
Joy blossoms through me, from my toes up into the rest of my body to the point that I look down to see if I’m flying. “Yeah, you did. ”
Chapter 33
Isaiah
I LEAN AGAINST THE FRAME of a ’76 Nova and listen as the guys from class shoot the shit during the last remaining minutes of school. Today, some other guys from class and I taught the freshmen how to strip the paint. With the paint job done, they continue their jacked-up conversation about some jock from school caught juicing. Life must suck when you have parents and money to blow on steroids.
I pull out my phone and reread last night’s conversation with Rachel. The two of us text. Sometimes we talk on the phone. Because of her parents and brothers, it’s hard for her to get out to see me, and I don’t want her taking a risk that’ll raise flags when we have other days that require her being out of the house.
I try not to overanalyze what’s going on with Rachel. I like her. She likes me. At some point, she’ll change her mind, but for now I’ll enjoy the ride.
In another world, she would have been the kind of girl I would have taken to dinner and a movie. I would have knocked on her front door, met her father, charmed her mother, brought flowers and done all that wooing shit that guys are supposed to do when trying to win the girl.
But all that crap means I would have lived another life. One with parents who gave a damn. One where I had a home and maybe a bed frame, maybe a room. In the span of one week, I’ve done the two things the system taught me neve
r to do: felt too much and dreamed of a different life. Wandering thoughts and feelings lead to an impending wreck.
I shove it all away. I’ve had a past that promises no future so it’s better to stick with the present.
Last night, my remaining favors came in. I bring up Rachel’s name in a text message. It’s time for me and her to meet again.
Me: where r u
The right side of my mouth tilts up with Rachel’s immediate reply: intern in library 4 last period
Me: got the parts I need 4 your car. Come tomorrow.
Rachel: Thursday w Mom, remember?
She mentioned earlier in the week that she had plans with her mom that night.
Me: Friday, right after school.
Her: K
Because I don’t want to let her go yet: Saturday we race.
Her: :)
“Isaiah,” says Zach from the middle of the group. “You smiling?”
Yeah, guess I am. I slide my phone back into my pocket and the smile off my face. My image has kept me alive, and I play the part to perfection: badass, loyal, ready for a fight. “You staring, man?”
He raises a hand. “No offense meant. Are you taking the ASE certification next week?”
I nod and watch the second hand of the clock. Only a few more seconds until the bell.
“Some of us are worried,” Zach says. “About passing. ”
I’ve failed a lot of tests in my life, but this is the one I know I can kill. The ten guys I’ve gone through the program with since my freshman year focus on me. For most of these guys, myself included, the ASE is our key to avoid becoming minimum-wage car-wash attendants. “Holden gave us a study guide. ”
“We all know you’re gonna pass,” says Zach. That humming sensation that informs me something’s not right vibrates below my skin. Several of the guys glance cautiously at each other.
As if preparing for a fight, I widen my stance. “What’s this about?”
Most look away or shuffle back. Zach also averts his gaze, but he keeps talking. “You know it’s computerized, right?”
“Yeah. ”
“And we’ll all be in the same room?”
“Yeah. ”
“What if we could find a way where you could offer us assistance during the test?”
The muscles in my shoulders flex, and the guys closest to me take an interest in the equipment behind them. “I’ve carried your ass for four years, showing you the same shit with cars over and over again. I think that’s been enough assistance. ”
The bell rings and everyone bolts for the door—everyone but me and Zach. Cheating on this test could cost me my certification, and I will not permit anyone to fuck up my future. His shoulders slump and I head for the exit.
“Isaiah,” he says as my arm smacks into his. “I hear you’re in debt to Eric. ”
I freeze, our arms still touching. “So. ”
He shrugs, but he’s anything but uncaring. “Just repeating what I heard. Wouldn’t want things to become worse. ”
I shift so that we’re chest to chest and tilt my head so that I’m in his face. “Is that a threat?”
Zach wilts because the ass has always been a coward. “Not if you remember who your friends are. ” He slinks toward the hallway and turns at the last minute. “And if the person you were texting was Rachel, tell her I said hi. ”
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