Luella’s Longing: Romance on the Oregon Trail Book Two

by Ball, Kathleen

  “It’ll be nice to have clean clothes. Thank you.” He reached into the wagon. “I bought this for you yesterday.”

  “Declan Leary, how much did you think to spend on me?”

  He shrugged his left shoulder. “This is more practical.”

  She removed the brown paper wrapping, delighted by a sewing needle and some spools of thread, and several lengths of fabric. “I’m good with a needle. I can make you shirts and me some dresses.”

  A smile broke over his face. “So you approve?”

  “Oh, very much so. We can wear these clothes for a very long time. Thank you, Declan.”

  “Your smile is very becoming.”

  Her face heated. She fussed with the brown wrapping so she wouldn’t have to look up. “Don’t forget your dirty clothes.”

  * * *

  Declan had spent most of the early part of the day checking the feet of the livestock. He checked the shoes and in some cases put new ones on. Even the oxen were shod. His next plan was to make sure the wagons were in good shape. The metal around the outside of each wheel had to be maintained, and the axles needed to be greased and inspected for any cracks. The canvas needed to be free of threadbare spots. It wouldn’t do to have a wagon break down when they were on the trail. When he finished that wagon, he’d make sure the wagon Harrison drove was in good condition too.

  When he looked around, he chuckled. Damp, clean clothes hung everywhere. He should have strung a line for Luella. Most women were finished with their laundry, but she still had a pile next to her to finish. Smiling he headed for her. She looked upset. She was used to hard work, so he didn’t think it was that. Had someone said something to her?

  “I will string a couple lines for you.”

  She stood up. “That will help, thank you. I’d like to hang these before I do more.”

  “Those aren’t my clothes. Did something happen?”

  She shook her head. “No, Zander and Heath were late dropping off their clothes. I thought I was done, but I wasn’t.”

  “I bet your arm hurts.”

  She didn’t say anything as she got back on her knees and continued to scrub a pair of trousers that looked like they hadn’t been washed in months. She tried to school her expression, but he saw the pain in her eyes.

  He took the trousers out of her hands and let them fall to the ground. He helped her to stand then swung her up into his arms and set her on the tailgate. “Did you tell them to bring their clothes for you to wash?”

  “It hadn’t occurred to me, but I’m happy to do it, only… I’m not as healed as I thought.” She stared at the ground, not meeting his gaze, as though she’d done something wrong.

  “Look at me,” he ordered softly. “You’re my wife, not theirs. They washed—or it looks like didn’t wash—their own clothes. Heath and I always did our own. I never paid much attention to what Zander did. He presumed a lot by bringing his clothes here. Heath too, for that matter. You sit and rest. I’ll get you some water, get the line strung and the clothes hung.”

  She didn’t say a word, and he was happy she didn’t object to his plan. He offered her a cup of water, and she sipped it then handed it back and he took his own sip.

  Why did Zander treat Luella like a servant? If he had asked, it would have been different. Luella probably would have tried anyway. She was a sweet generous woman, and she didn’t need anyone taking advantage of her good nature. But presuming without even asking… It made Declan’s temper flare. Both Zander and Heath knew she’d been hurt. She hadn’t quite finished their bedding and a couple of his shirts, so he set about washing the last of their laundry.

  He tried not to show his anger, though. As he scrubbed and rinsed, he talked to her about the weather and how it had reminded him of Ireland that morning. Finally, he was done with the wash. He poured the water out of the wash tub and left the clothes on the ground. Heath and Zander could wash their own things.

  Finished with the laundry, he went about his maintenance of the wagon, explaining it to her as he went along. He greased the axle and checked each wheel, went over the canvas and repaired a few places where it had worn thin over the ribs.

  Once the wagon maintenance was out of the way and the other wagon seen to, he set up the tent for them for sleeping in that night.

  He wasn’t quite through with securing the stakes, when Captain London rode up. “Got some buffalo meat from the hunt this morning.” He held out a portion without dismounting.

  Luella stepped forward and accepted the meat with a shy smile. “Thank you.”

  “Your first day married,” Captain London said. “How’s it working out?”

  “So far we’re doing well,” Luella said, widening her smile.

  “Good, good. I have plenty more wagons to get to.” He nodded to her then to Declan and went over to the next wagon.

  “It looks like enough for buffalo steaks,” she said.

  “I’m making dinner. I’ll go see how many will be here before I start cooking.” He kissed her and then walked off. He had a couple of men to see and hold conversations with about their treatment of his wife.

  He ran into Heath first, resting under a tree with his back against the trunk, twirling a long blade of prairie grass between his thumb and forefinger. Dropping the grass, he sat up and met Declan’s stormy gaze with a frown. “Bee crawl in your hat?”

  “No,” answered Declan easily. “I finished looking over the oxen and the wagons. You handling your responsibilities?”

  Heath nodded, shooting Declan a wary glance.

  “Luella has certainly been busy,” continued Declan, struggling to hide his irritation. “Though I’m a bit concerned. It wasn’t long ago that she was injured, and she doesn’t yet have all of her strength back.”

  A scowl darkened Heath’s face. “I hadn’t realized. I haven’t seen her since breakfast, but I’ll lend a hand where needed.”

  Declan contemplated his brother. “You didn’t bring your clothes for Luella to wash?”

  Heath’s jaw dropped and his eyes widened. “Why would I do that? She’s not my wife. Besides, it’s your first day married. Why? Did something happen?”

  “Zander dropped his and your clothes off for Luella to wash,” Declan ground out through clenched teeth. “The pain I saw on her face had me hurting for her. A few of the women take in wash for money, but he offered nothing, just expected her to do the extra work.” He shook his head. “I just don’t know why he dislikes my wife so much.”

  “He said something about her thinking she can sweet talk her way through life.”

  Declan nodded. “That was my fault. I called her a mhuirnín. Then I realized it was too soon to say such things. I told her it mean dear friend. She called Zander a mhuirnín this morning when she was serving breakfast.”

  Heath threw his head back and laughed. “I guess Zander doesn’t want to be her darling.” It took a few minutes before he stopped laughing. “Did Zander have a liking for her before you married her? Truthfully, I never took much notice of her except for the scolding she got from her father.” He shrugged. “She seems nice enough, and I’m glad you like her.”

  “Yes… I… like her.” Declan nodded and then directed the conversation to a somewhat safer topic. “Captain London dropped off some meat from this morning’s hunt. I’m cooking supper tonight and we will eat only our share.”

  “Wait.” Heath stood, a frown wrinkling his brow. “How much did Zander eat this morning? As far as I could see, there wasn’t much cooked.”

  “It sounded to me he ate half of what she made. I’m not sure she even ate. I told her to rest.” He turned to walk away but paused and glanced over his shoulder. “You might want to get someone to wash your clothes for you.”

  Heath nodded rapidly. “No problem. I’m sorry your day isn’t going as well. But the horses have all been fed and brushed down. A couple of the mares are carrying. We should be in Oregon before the foals are born. I don’t know which stallion it was. They’re all of g
ood breeding, so I doubt Harrison will care. There’s no way to keep the animals separated out here.”

  Declan nodded. “We’re just fortunate none saw fit to fight over the mares. I’ll see you for supper. There're biscuits and bacon for the noon meal.” With a final nod at his brother, he went in search of Zander.

  He found him at the river skipping stones across the surface. He looked to be in a snit.

  “Been looking for you, Zander,” Declan barked. “You’ll need to find someone to do your laundry. My wife tired herself out on your filthy pants.”

  Zander opened his mouth, but Declan waved him into silence.

  “I asked, and she made no offer to do your laundry. She’s not doing any extra work. She’s regaining her strength. It’s disrespectful to treat my wife like your servant, and it’ll happen no more.”

  Zander’s mouth quirked up on one side. “In case you didn’t know it, she’s been showing interest in me. You should have heard what she called me this morning.” He smirked. “You’ll need to put a leash on her.”

  “I already know what was said, and I had told her it meant ‘dear friend.’ She was trying to be nice to you even though you ate most of the food she had prepared.” Declan stepped closer. “You made a scene last night grabbing her from me and trying to dance with her. You hurt her. What have you got against her?”

  “Fine. She hardly acknowledges me.” Zander spat into the river. “She thinks she’s better than me. I tried to give her a ride a few times so she wouldn’t have to walk, but she only shook her head and kept walking. Then she ignored me. She’s just like her father, thinking the rules don’t apply to him. I’ve known people like her all my life. The Indian would have taken her down a peg and put her in her place.”

  “You’re wrong,” Declan ground out, glaring at his old friend. “Luella is sweet and generous. She doesn’t think she’s good enough for anyone. Her father browbeat her at every turn. Didn’t you hear the constant yelling at their wagon? Everyone got to rest but her. She wasn’t allowed to talk to any male and taking you up on your offer would have ended badly for her. When she was hurt and unable to work, her father wanted nothing to do with her.” He drew a deep breath. “So I don’t think your claim of her thinking she’s better than anyone is true. But I would have thought the fact that she is my wife would have been enough for you to treat her kindly.” He shook his head and strode away, unable to continue the conversation.

  Zander’s explanation was weak. There were plenty who thought themselves better than the Irish. It was the way of things. But he was mistaken about Luella.

  “Declan!” called Zander across the distance between them. “You might want to make sure she’s not carrying already. Jimmy Tomlin was meeting her at night when the others were asleep. I saw them with my own eyes. Plain and simple, she’s playing you for a fool.”

  Declan’s steps faltered. He felt gut kicked. Who else had seen her and Tomlin? Had she been so desperate to get away from her father she offered her favors to a man she thought would marry her? His hands clenched into fists. Zander could be a fool, but he wasn’t a liar.

  Shaking his head, he walked farther down the river and watched the water rush by. His chest grew tight, and it became hard to breathe. Zander wasn’t the fool, he was the fool. Her father must have known she was carrying and that was why he wanted her away from the rest of them. She had said she jumped from the wagon. But maybe her father had pushed her. Both Tomlin and Luella had blond hair but Tomlin’s eyes were brown. Any child wouldn’t look like Declan at all and there would be a scandal. Did Tomlin know he would maybe be a father? Declan kicked the ground, sending a shower of tiny pebbles through the air. He hated lies more than almost anything else.

  Alana had always been honest. Her face told everyone what she was thinking. Most days she smiled as bright as the sun. Before the blight on the potatoes he’d saved every cent. He wanted to provide for Alana. The ache in his heart renewed. He could picture her smiling at him with her twinkling blue eyes. An arrow of pain shot through him, and he almost doubled over from it all.

  Lord, what am I to do now? I know Alana is dead, but she’s still in my heart. I thought my heart was filling with feelings for Luella, but I can see that’s been a mistake. I don’t have a choice but be her husband, but I don’t have it in me to give her affection and smiles. I don’t want to confront her either. She’ll cry and I’ll end up feeling sorry for her. There are many months left until we get to Oregon. I tied myself to her for life, but is she still seeing Tomlin? Lord, help me turn my heart into stone so I don’t lash out at her. She was sick this morning, and now I know it must be because she is carrying. I don’t want to harm her child, for he is an innocent. Please help me through this.

  He swallowed hard and waited for his moist eyes to dry before he went back to make the noon meal.

  * * *

  “What are you doing?”

  She turned from the tailgate and smiled. “I thought cornbread would go nicely with the steaks.”

  He frowned. “Please go in the wagon and rest for a bit.”

  Something was wrong, she could feel it. “It’s too hot in the wagon. I’ll go and sit by the river for a spell.”

  He nodded. “Stay where I can see you.”

  The terseness in his voice didn’t sit well. Had she done something? Studying his face didn’t help. His expression of displeasure didn’t change. She slowly walked to the river; the mighty Platte River. They’d be crossing it tomorrow. It ran quick and it looked deep.

  She sat on a large rock and rested. Was he mad about making supper? She hadn’t asked him to, she would have been happy to cook. Was he upset that the noon meal hadn’t been set out? Had Zander given him a hard time? It felt as though his mood was directed toward her, but she didn’t know him well enough to know for certain.

  Three unwed girls sat down not too far from her. Luella had envied their friendship. Mandy Echols, Leona Felton, and Patty Mince. They each had large families and bemoaned all the work that it entailed. They wanted to find husbands, and she often heard them talking about the men in the group. Too bad she never had the time to make friends. They enjoyed each other.

  They didn’t acknowledge her, not even with a nod, and that was unusual. They were nice enough to everyone, so why did it feel as if they were ignoring her? Luella went on staring at the river, but their voices drifted to her.

  “It’s not true. Can you imagine? He would be at the bottom of my list,” Patty said.

  “He likes to peek into wagons when women are changing.” Mandy said. “Captain London caught him.”

  “We don’t know the whole story. Maybe her father sold her to Tomlin like he did to that Indian.” Leona commented. “It’s a real shame she took the best looking man for herself.”

  “He is very nice looking. He learned a lesson about being too nice the hard way. I can’t imagine any happiness coming from their union. He got into a fight with Zander.” Mandy sighed.

  “It’s too bad he didn’t know the truth before he married her. My mother will be looking for me. I’d best help.” Patty stood. “We might as well all go,” she suggested.

  Luella sat very still. The truth about what? Why did they think her father had sold her to Tomlin, of all people? None of it made sense. Was that why Declan had been cold to her? No, he wouldn’t believe a story like that. It would be best forgotten.

  She’d sat for some time, though she had gotten little rest. Would it be enough to satisfy Declan? It was almost supper time anyway, so she stood and watched the people around the wagons. Most were work weary, but at least they’d had a day to rest. She put a smile on her face; she was the “happy bride,” after all. It would be awkward eating with Zander, but she’d get through it. And then she wanted to heat enough water so she could take a bath in the washtub, but she wouldn’t bother Declan about it now.

  It was funny how happiness could be so close as to be almost within reach, and then a body was suddenly alone and trying to figure o
ut what to do next. Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted movement, turned and saw Tomlin approaching her. She hastened her steps hoping to avoid him, but he was faster and caught up, grabbing her arm in a punishing grip and yanking her backward.

  “I don’t know what you’re playing at,” he snarled, “but people seem to think I took advantage of you.” He shook her. “You know that’s not true. I want the gossip stopped. I don’t know who got you pregnant, but it sure wasn’t me.” He pushed her aside as he let go and left.

  Tremors rocked her body. It was obvious he’d meant business, but she didn’t know what he was talking about. Pregnant? Was that what people were saying? What those girls had meant?

  A few weeks ago she had been invisible to everyone. Now she was the main attraction and it was uncomfortable. Everyone stared at her as she approached the wagon, and she stopped. She looked each person in the eye. She’d done nothing wrong, and she would not act shamed.

  Finally, she spotted her husband and some of her panic waned. Watching him, she waited for him to come and escort her back to the wagon, but he stared at her too. She wasn’t worldly enough to know what was going on or what to do. The only thing she could do was go to the wagon.

  She wanted to hold her head up high but found she couldn’t. She stared at her feet as she walked to the wagon. Once there she climbed into the back and lay on the tick with a handkerchief pressed against her mouth. She was half afraid she’d sob so loud the whole camp would hear her.

  As far as she could figure, her only crime was jumping out of the moving wagon and getting hurt. It had been a jumble since then, landing her where everyone thought she wasn’t moral. She had been raised with the word of God, and she’d never be with anyone but her husband.

  All of her good behavior and trying not to chafe at her father’s overprotectiveness had turned out to be for naught. Though it had brought her closer to God’s love. He’d been the only one she could bare her heart to. He knew what was in her heart now.