Hadad glanced out the window, automatically seeking the outside rather than run the risk of selfrevelation inside. The town was shifting in its normal rhythms, a little slowed by the presence of the mother ship, but the only noticeable difference was that people on the street watched the ship as they walked, watched it as they crossed from office to office, watched it as they took a break from the routine and came outside for a breath of air. Humans seldom look up. Today they all did.
The Visitor in the store had been Jeffrey. At one time they had been classmates. They had come from the same community at home, recruited the same day. They had heard the promises of fame and glory and conquest at the same lecture. They spoke the same dialect. They had chosen the same planetary project. They had been friends. Until Hadad had been chosen to lead the expedition and Jeffrey had been overlooked for another project, and placed as his assistant. Spligxzt was Jeffrey’s true name. It meant “The Jealous One.”
It had been hard to lead a friend. It had been hard to be a friend to one who could not follow. When the plans diverted them from the original mission, Jeffrey had gloated. And perhaps friendship could have been restored if they had been given separate duties on the new project. They still had so much they had shared. But when Hadad was put in charge of the program to maintain the storage system of human packages, Jeffrey had been made his assistant. And that was more than their bonds of friendship could sustain.
They had done their work. Jeffrey had followed orders. But they had never again spoken as buddies.
The message Jeffrey had jeered at him was the final coup in the intense battle for supremacy that Jeffrey had waged with him, that Hadad had surrendered to. Jeffrey wanted power and glory. He did not have power or glory. Hadad did not want either, and aboard the ship, before Diana had changed their targeted destination on Earth, he had had them both. When Hadad had left for the compound in Los Angeles, relieved of his post on the mother ship, Jeffrey had been given his shipboard position; that had, at last, given Jeffrey power. Now he could have his glory. The message he delivered was that Diana had given orders that Hadad was to be shot on sight as a traitor. Jeffrey had found him. He would be rewarded for the information that “the despicable one” was on Earth.
It had seemed that Jeffrey had accepted Ruth’s story. But Hadad wasn’t sure. He did not know how many others from this ship would recognize him. It was not Diana’s ship. That was clear from Jeffrey’s message. But how many of the troops would he know, would know him? And how sympathetic were the commanders with Diana’s personal vendetta against him? He had defied her, not the whole service. But would anyone know that?
“What do you do down at the mill?”
The question brought him back from his reverie, back to the table, back to the eyes of the deer.
Hadad shook his head.
“I said, what do you do down at the mill?”
“I sweep. Sometimes I carry things. Heavy things.” “I thought you said you were going to be a king. That doesn’t sound like the sort of things kings are trained to do. What did you do before you came here?”
“I. . Hadad laughed, seeing the craziness in what he would be describing if he told the truth. “I . . He laughed again.
“This had better be a good one. What did you do? Guard hordes of beautiful maidens in the holds of slave ships? Do battle with Amazon queens for power and control of empires? Program giant computers so that with the flip of a switch only you could touch you could destroy or preserve the lives of millions? What did you do, for heaven’s sake, that’s so funny?”
“All of those things and a few more.”
Ruth laughed, and the laugh was contagious. They fed on each other’s enjoyment and on the outrageousness of the idea, she that he could say he did those things, he that she could describe so accurately his truth without knowing she had done so.
When the laughter had let loose of them, and they had caught their breath, she asked again: “Seriously, now. I cannot imagine a man who was trained to lead a nation being content all his life pushing a broom. What are you trained to do? What kind of position did you have before you came here?”
“I can’t answer that question simply. To learn to lead, you must learn how to be in front of people. To lead them you must find out what direction they are going and get there first. To lead a nation is not to be different from the nation. It is only to know what the nation is and to let it be that. It is no different pushing a broom. Except that to push a broom, you must learn to follow. But I haven’t answered your question. One of the things I did was to program computers, as you said.”
“Then why didn’t you get a job here programming computers? There’s a whole room of computers at the courthouse, and I know they need good programmers.”
“What do you know about computers?”
“Not much. I’ve done data entry. I worked at a university doing that. I’ve never programmed one, if that’s what you mean.”
“Okay. Most work with computers for most people is ‘data entry,’ as you call it. The rest of it is figuring out how to make the circuitry of a machine that is very simple do what someone wants done. When I came to Prineville, I could have learned to work with the computers. They are all different. But they are all alike. Ours are basically not so different from yours. I had no problem in Los Angeles when I had to use the computers at the compound. The problem was not the computers. The problem was I did not speak American. I still do not do good at speaking. But then I did not know the words. In order for me to work I would need to know what someone wanted the computer to do that it could not already do. They would have to explain it in American. If they could explain it in ‘computer’ they would not need me.”
“And so you pushed a broom.”
“And so I pushed a broom. Because they could explain that without the words I did not know.” “Doesn’t it frustrate you to not be using your mind?”
“What does it mean, ‘frustrate’?”
“That’s a hard one. I don’t know. Make you upset, angry.”
“And what does it mean ‘not to be using your mind’?”
“Not creating, not solving problems, not doing something important—I don’t know.”
“I do not think I have ever not used my mind. Perhaps when I have the experience I can let you know if it makes me upset or angry.”
Ruth laughed again, but this time Hadad did not see the joke, not even his own version of the joke. “You sound like a Zen master.”
“What is a Zen master?”
“Zen masters are teachers who teach by asking questions like what is the sound of one hand clapping?”
“But that is the sound of silence. I do not understand what is so difficult about that, or funny.”
“And you are the only person I have ever known who has responded to that question without a second thought. You are either very foolish or very wise.” “If the word is the one I think it is, I think I am very foolish. You said you had done data entry for something called a university. What is that?”
“It’s a school. In America it is the most advanced school.”
“Then you were a student.”
“Yes. Among other things.”
“What other things?”
“Oh, I’ve done lots of things: I studied art history at the university. I loved the history part. But I had a lot of trouble with the criticism. I just didn’t have the same value system as the professor did. Got me in a lot of trouble. So I was an actress for a while, in Los Angeles. I made a film once. That was okay. I was a folksinger in San Francisco for a long time, but I got tired of always being in front of people. New people every night, a few regulars. Pretty soon I got the feeling nobody even heard what I was singing. I wasn’t touching people anymore. So I traveled, worked with healers. Once I taught in a special school for children who were deaf. That’s probably the most important thing I’ve ever done. Since then I’ve lived by the things I make. Now I make leather goods. Before, I painted. Before that, I thr
ew pots.”
“Who did you throw pots at?”
“No, no. I didn’t throw pots at people. That’s what they call it when you make pots out of clay.”
“Oh, I see.”
“I’ll show you sometime.”
Again the eyes caught him. Again he did not know what he was supposed to say, what he could say, what he wanted to say. There was a moment when there was nothing in the world except the look in her eyes. I le stared. After a while she looked away.
“Mostly I ... I guess I’m sort of a mixture,” she began again. “When I’m working with people, I get tired of having people around all the time. And when 1 work alone, I get lonely. That’s why I quit the computer job. I never really talked to anyone.” She looked up at him; this time she did not look that special way.
Hadad looked out the window again at the people. He was restless with the waiting, waiting for something to happen that would make the threat more tangible or make it go away.
“You haven’t eaten much.”
“What? ... Oh, no, I’m sorry.”
“That’s all right. Different people worry in different ways. I eat.”
“What?”
“When I’m worried or frightened, I eat. Some people can’t eat when they are frightened.”
“Oh.”
“We haven’t talked about it.”
“Eating?”
“No, the Visitors.”
“No.”
“Are we all going to be taken up in that ship and served for their dinners?”
“I don’t know.”
“Why are they here? They weren’t here before. I thought from the reports on the freedom network that we were safe up here. Lots of people have come to
Oregon because it was safer. Why are they here all of a sudden?”
“I have asked the same question. I have also asked why they have not come before.”
“Because of the red dust.”
“Exactly. But now they are here.”
“How can they exist here?”
Hadad looked at her. He wondered how much he should tell her of his thoughts, of his assessments. How much could he tell her without revealing who he was? He had an answer to her question. He chose his words carefully.
“There are two explanations possible. First, the red dust might not be effective here; it might be dormant.”
“That’s not possible. It’s too cold here. I heard the report on the freedom network. The virus stays alive if it can hibernate, if it’s cold enough.”
“Second, it is possible that they have been working on a vaccine, an antidote. If they have found one, then they would have to find a place to test it.”
“A place with red dust.”
“A place where they thought there was red dust.” “Then they might not be after us.”
“You cannot trust that thought. Everyone must protect himself from being taken on the ship, from being taken in the trucks, from being taken to the processing.”
“Do you know what they do?”
“Yes.”
“I’ve heard it’s awful.”
“Ruth, why do you not eat meat?”
“Because I—” She hesitated. “I was going to say because I reverence life. But before I learned what my body needs, I used to eat meat. And I had just as much reverence for life then. I have reverence for the
life of the carrot I just ate. I guess . . .”
“Is it awful for the carrot to be made into your juice?”
“I suppose it would be if the carrot were not willing to be made into my juice.”
“And how do you know the carrot is willing?”
“I guess I just believe it is supposed to be willing. I don’t know.”
“For the Visitors”—-Hadad said the word cautiously—“it is right for them to prepare their food. For the food comes the choice whether it is to be willing or not. If it is willing, it is not an awful process. If it is unwilling, then the food tastes of the fear.” “How do you know that?”
“Because I know about food. That is one of the things I am trained about to be a king.”
“Is Mr. Ripley right that we have to kill the Visitors to protect ourselves?”
“He is right. And the other man is right. It is not necessary just to kill. To kill is to live always in fear. It is also necessary to make them go away.”
“How do we do that?”
“There is something no one knows. Something you must not tell to the wrong people. Something that would make everyone here even more frightened, and worse, could put the people here in even more danger.”
“Who are the right people?”
“I do not know. That is why I must tell you. I . . . my American is too clumsy, I would make a mistake.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Ruth, I know something about Prineville that makes it very dangerous for the Visitors to be here. Dangerous for you, not for them.”
“What do you know about Prineville?”
“There is no red dust in this valley. I do not know how far the space extends that is uncontainerated.” “You mean uncontaminated.”
“Yes.”
“How do you know?”
“That is one of the other things I do . . .”
“. . . to be a king.”
“No, to be alive.”
“You mean a job? Who are you working for? Why are they studying Prineville? Who sent you here?” “No. You follow the wrong rail.”
“You mean wrong track.” Ruth started to laugh in spite of herself and in spite of the seriousness of her interest in what she was now learning.
“When the red dust was first spread into the winds to carry it all over the country, none of the dust was released into the winds that reached this part of the high desert. I waited for it to come. It did not come. The other way it has not come yet either.”
“What do you mean?”
“The red dust is a virus. It will grow in the cells of the animals that have breathed it. It will not hurt humans. It will not hurt animals. But it will continue to grow. If the Visitors eat the meat of the animals who have breathed the live virus, then they will die, even if the red dust is no longer in the air.”
“It works two ways then.”
“Yes. It is worst for the Visitors to breathe the dust themselves. That is to be dead right away. It is slower the other way.”
“They have stopped dusting in a lot of places. They used to announce it on the freedom network. They don’t announce the dustings anymore.”
“Since the dust does not harm Earth ones, it is no reason to stop. The only reason to stop must be because the Visitors cannot use the meat of the ones who have the virus, and so those Earth ones are safe.
That is the only logic that makes reason to stop the dustings.”
“But you said—”
“That is right. The virus has not reached the cells of the animals here. That is the information you must tell no one. If the Visitors were to find that out, then they would collect the people here as food. If they think you have the virus, they may not want to contaminate the food-storage systems. You may be safe.”
“How do you know the virus has not reached the animals, for that matter, the people?”
“About all the people I do not know. About the animals I know only the ones I have . . . tested.” “And that’s why you’re here?”
“Yes, that is why I am here.”
“Who sent you?”
“No one sent me. I . . .” Here it became hard for Hadad to fit his truth with the limits of the words he had to use.
“Are you part of the resistance?”
“No.”
“Who do you work for?”
“Ruth, this is not important. I want to know. I wanted to know because I cannot go home. Prineville is like my home, at least a little. I wanted to know because I wanted to know if it is safe for Prineville. I do not want to have to run away like the man, Joe, was saying.”
; “How did you get to be a king without being trained to fight?”
Hadad smiled. “I never got to be a king.”
“That’s right. I forgot. Somehow 1 sort of ran it all together. About you being a king. I never knew anyone who was going to be a king before.”
“You don’t know anyone who is going to be a king now.”
“That’s true.”
“Will you run away from the Visitors?”
“Prineville is home. I do not know where to go.” “You told me about the red dust for a reason. Who am I supposed to tell?”
“As long as the Visitors send just one or two from the ship to look around, they will never find out about the food supply and you are safe. If I am right, they will test their antidote, and find that it works. That will mean they can invade the parts of the country that are cold, where the virus remains. Then they will start to work on the food processing. But that gives you some time.”
“But their antidote might not be working. It’s not a true test.”
“That’s right. But they don’t know that yet. They must never find out. You must find the resistance in Los Angeles. You must convince them to dust the high desert.”
“And the antidote?”
“If it works, then there is nothing that can save Prineville anyway. All you will have bought is time. But it may be time you need to find another solution. If the antidote fails, then they will leave.”
“How will we have bought time?”
“To make enough antidote for the entire ship to stay in the area for a long period will take time. For a test, it is simple. But for living with the virus, they will need to build a plant to produce the antidote in quantity.”
“But wouldn’t they do that anyway, even without the red dust? Wouldn’t they just assume that the antidote is working and start producing it?”
“You call that ‘bluff,’ right?”
“Yes, we call that‘bluff.’”
“Bluff works only when someone is afraid of consequences. The Visitors are not afraid of consequences.”
“What do you mean?”
“If a man goes into a bank and says, ‘I have a gun in my pocket. Give me the money or I will shoot,’ the person has to decide if it is real, the threat, or just bluff. If he thinks it is real, he gives him the money. If he thinks it is bluff, he stalls and sets off the alarm to call the police. That is what they say on the television programs.”
V 14 - The Oregon Invasion Page 5
