Zach processed the words. She couldn't quit. She hadn't even started yet.
“No, Rae...” Scott started, but nothing else came out.
“Don't worry about it.” The emotion was gone from her voice. “Zach was right. I'm just going to fuck everything up. You've got your numbers. You've used me for everything you needed to. Go get successful again. I'll leave you both alone.”
Had he just been dumped? Zach grabbed her wrist before she could walk away. “Wait.”
She directed her glare at him.
Zach let go. He should go after her, but he didn’t know if he could find the right things to say. He directed every ounce of fury and anger he could at Scott. For the first time in he didn’t know how long, he couldn’t find a single word for the flames raging inside.
Chapter Eighteen
Rae sat at her desk—correction, the desk in her sister’s guest bedroom. It had been three days since she walked out on Zach and Scott in the coffee shop. It was childish, but she’d ignored all their messages and calls. Scott’s words still echoed in her head every time she let her thoughts wander.
You're not his type. You'd need to be about six inches taller and ten pounds lighter.
The venom crawled through her veins until every inch of her ached. This was only supposed to be an extended vacation. A chance to hang out with her sister while Rae looked for a new job. A break from life.
I thought I was just being paranoid wondering if my best friends were fucking each other behind my back.
The accusation bounced in her skull. She rubbed her eyes and tried to force the memory away. Why had she tried to turn it into more? Sure, the time spent with Zach was incredible. God, it couldn’t have been anything but and still hurt this much. It was still borrowed. All of this. She’d known that from the start, and ignored it.
Is this just an excuse to keep your piece of tail on the payroll?
No. It meant more than that. Her idea wasn’t a way to keep herself in Zach’s life. This was for the people she cared about, right?
Or was she really so selfish she’d talked them into an idea without thinking it through just to get back a life she surrendered years ago?
A knock echoed through the apartment—someone at the front door—and Rae dropped her head in her arms. She couldn’t ignore this forever. She needed to talk to Zach, at least. She owed him that.
She wasn’t so sure about Scott.
You’re not his type...You’d need to be—
Chloe’s loud whoop cut through painful thoughts, and Rae redirected her focus to outside her head.
She shook the haunting voice aside. This wasn’t doing her any good. She grabbed her phone and dialed.
“Rae?” Zach’s voice was distorted by background noise. “Hey.”
Ambivalence warred inside. Joy and sadness. “Where are you?”
“The airport. I’m glad you called. Silly question, but how soon can you be here?”
“Where are you going?” Was he making good on his promise to pack it all in and buy a one-way ticket to Europe? Shit.
“Chicago. You didn’t listen to my voice mails. I have a lead on some inexpensive development hardware, and I need to take a look in person. Come with me.”
He was still moving ahead with business as normal. Relief and joy filled her at the realization, but something bitter tempered it. They could do this without her. Of course they can.
“I can’t.” She wasn’t sure how this situation was going to work itself out, but she knew if she went with him, it would make things worse. “It won’t solve anything.”
“Then fuck this entire idea. Meet me here, and we’ll figure out a new plan.”
“You’d never forgive yourself if you blew this off.”
His sigh amplified the noise around him. “I won’t be doing any better if I blow you off.”
It was selfish of her to smile, but she couldn’t help it. “Take your trip. We’ll talk when you get back.”
“Promise me.”
Something whispered in her head, asking if she could keep that promise. “Of course.”
“Rae?”
“Hmm?”
“Nothing.” The word was clipped. “Talk to you soon.”
“Yeah.” She disconnected and dropped her phone on the desk. That had gone about as middle-of-the-road as was possible. She rubbed her face. Now what?
“Lorraine!” Chloe’s shout was accompanied by a pounding on the bedroom door.
Find out why her sister was screaming loud enough for everyone in every surrounding apartment to hear. “What?”
The door creaked open. “I got my offer.” Chloe all but skipped across the room, and threw her arms around Rae’s neck. “You made it work.”
Rae hugged her back. “I just had an idea. They made it work.”
“Whatever.” Chloe pulled back and looked her in the eye. “What kind of magic tricks do you have to get Jordan out of his Cord contract?”
He was one of the few who survived staff cuts, and he’d had to make a difficult choice. Staying with Cord and DM meant his name would be smeared all over their upcoming game. But it also meant working with a group of people he didn’t care for. Leaving meant the job he wanted, but he’d have to wait a year before signing with Scott and Zach, because of the non-compete clause he’d signed when Cord hired him. The clause that was only erased with the severance offers.
Rae saw both sides of the argument and knew it had been tough on him to decide. “Contracts aren’t really my specialty.” Understatement of the decade, apparently. The argument from the other morning tried to force its way back, and she shelved it.
“Talk to him,” Chloe said.
“Jordan?”
Chloe raised her brows, and pursed her lips. “Scott. You’re not doing anyone any good sitting in here and moping. Or at least go buy us some ice cream, so you can mope and I can celebrate.”
Rae rolled her eyes, but smiled. “Why should I call him?”
“He’s your best friend.”
She hadn’t told Chloe the details of their argument the other day and saw no reason to. Her sister deserved this job, and Rae didn’t want to taint her opinion. “I’m pretty sure he’ll be okay without me.”
Chloe glanced behind her then turned her gaze to her feet. “Bullshit.”
“Excuse me?”
“Ignore for a minute that he’s my boss and gave me this chance, and it’s the best job I ever had. None of that matters right now.” Chloe shifted her weight, still studying her shoes. “He’s been there, by your side, since I was little. The two of you need each other.”
It was a sweet sentiment made bitter by the situation. “Did you ever think he and I would...end up together?” Rae had no idea where the question came from.
Chloe’s head shot up, and the look in her wide eyes said she was wondering the same thing. “God, no.”
“Why not?” Rae knew her own reasons, but now she was curious. Her stomach dropped into her feet when Scott stepped into the doorway behind Chloe, face an impassive mask.
Chloe couldn’t have seen him the way she stood, but she also had to know he was in the apartment. “It’s hard to explain. I just... You two don’t challenge each other. It’s too easy for you to settle when you’re together. Which is great for unwinding, but horrible for things like personal growth.”
Rae refused to look at him. “I don’t think we’re quite that compatible. A few days I would have agreed, so I can see why you’d say that, but it’s not true.”
“At least let me apologize,” Scott hovered in the doorway.
“No.” Rae was on her feet, irritation coursing through her. Her sister had set her up. Chloe tended to do things like that, but this was different.
“Stop.” Chloe grabbed her arm, spinning her so they were toe-to-toe and stared her down. “Hear him out.”
“You don’t know what he said to me.”
“I do. He told me. You also kept something really big from him.” Chloe let g
o of her and stepped out of the way. “I’m not taking sides. You both suck in the friends department as far as I’m concerned. But I told him I’d ask you, and now I have.”
Scott moved into the room but still kept his distance. “It hurt that neither of you told me what was going on. I saw it and told myself you wouldn’t keep that from me.”
Rae didn’t want to hear this. She stalked toward the door, coming up short when he blocked her path.
“Never tell anyone you heard me admit this, but I was wrong,” he said. “It doesn’t matter what you did or didn’t do. I was wrong to say those things. I was hurt, I knew it would hurt in return, and I shouldn’t have done it.”
She pushed him, but not hard enough to knock him out of the way. “Don’t steal my thunder like that, you asshole.”
“So are we talking again?”
“No.” She didn’t know how long it would take to get over the sting of his insults, but she also knew it wasn’t him. “And you’re not forgiven.”
“That’s fair. Let me buy you coffee.”
“Bribery won’t change anything.”
“There’s a place just a few blocks away.” He nodded toward the street.
“I know it.” She grabbed her purse and shoes. “You owe me big.”
As the door swung shut behind them, Chloe called, “Stay out as long as you need.”
“I owe you so very much more than just an I’m sorry.” Scott kept pace with her as they headed toward the street. “Walk?”
She nodded. They’d probably get there faster. Rae needed to hang onto some of her anger, but she also hated the idea of being mad at Scott. She didn’t know what else to do for now besides let him talk.
“I’ve always wanted this,” he said. “When I thought we’d lost it, I was lost.” He glanced at her. “I can’t thank you enough for helping me—both of us—keep it. You were right. I can’t do this without Zach.”
The words drilled into her already jumbled thoughts. At least they agreed on that. The thing was, now that she’d done her part, she was more certain than ever they could do it without her. It wasn’t a derogatory thought. She specialized in helping companies find their financial footing and then moved on.
That didn’t make the realization they’d be fine without her, at least company-wise, hurt any less. And this company was everything to them.
Chapter Nineteen
Rae tried to blink away the sting behind her eyelids. She swallowed, and her raw throat protested. She didn't want to be doing this, but there was no choice. She swore to herself she would do this professionally, and that meant offering her resignation officially and in person. Besides, she knew if she didn't say goodbye, it would devour her.
She knocked on Zach’s familiar door. At least her time here had been nice. She avoided his calls when he landed last night, wanting to talk face to face, and at the same time, terrified. It was the right decision though. She clutched her briefcase in front of her. She didn’t need it, but it gave her something to cling to and fiddle with.
Zach opened the front door, his surprise morphing into a soft smile. “Hey.”
She made sure her expression didn’t give anything away. “Good morning. I hope this is a good time.”
He reached for her and then stopped. “Something’s wrong.”
It looked like he wanted to say more. She was glad he didn't.
“Come in.” He nodded toward the living room.
“Thank you, but no. I won't be here long.” She winced inwardly at her own formal tone, but it was better this way. She just had to keep telling herself that.
“I missed—You look good.”
That hadn't been her intention. The below-the-knee skirt and suit jacket were supposed to say all business, not earn her compliments. She retrieved an envelope from the pocket of her briefcase. “I thought I'd make this official.”
Zach grabbed it and started to tear it in half.
The gesture dug deep, gnawing at raw wounds. She smiled and shook her head. “That won't change anything.”
“You can't. We can't do it without you.”
“Yeah, you can.” She ignored the ache throbbing behind her ribcage. “You just can't do it without each other. Besides, I'm leaving.”
“Just like that?”
“Not just like that. I accepted the offer I had before...” She couldn't finish the thought. Before what? Before they kept such a big secret from someone so important? Before she surrendered her heart even though she knew better? “Something came in that lets me get paid and keeps you all in business as well.”
“Where are you going?”
“Washington. The offer isn’t as good as something like CFO, but it’s enough to make it worth my time.” Her resignation and leaving meant something else, too. She hadn't officially broken it off with him, but the entire conversation implied it.
“What about us?” The emotion vanished from his voice, and the question was flat.
She knew the answer. She just had to tell him. It was the thought that haunted her more than any other. She’d left him once to keep his plans for the future from impacting her career, and she’d been mistaken. Things weren’t so cloudy this time though. Lust wasn’t a good excuse for breaking up the potential their business held... All she had to do was say so, but the words wouldn’t form. “What do you think?”
He lifted her chin, forcing her to look him in the eye. “You have to say it.”
“There's no us.”
“So you're going to do it again.” He dropped his hand, disdain echoing in his statement.
She deserved the irritation directed at her. “Not quite. No spending years blaming you for something that’s not your fault.” She forced out the last two words. “No regrets.”
She stepped back. She needed to leave soon because her composure wouldn't hold much longer. “The two of you need each other. Not in the you’re-an-adorable-couple kind of way your developers joke about, but you work too well together. I can't be what comes between you. And honestly, I can't take being the verbal punching bag for your testosterone-fueled arguments anymore. Goodbye. Good luck.”
Zach stepped up next to her and cupped the back of her neck with one hand.
A moan pulsed in her raw throat, and she swallowed it. Her expression never shifted.
He kissed her softly.
Desire screamed through her, and she beat it back. It took the last of her self-control not to return the gesture. She kept her mouth still and eyes open, staring at him blankly until he pulled away.
He frowned.
She turned away before the tears started leaking from her eyes and walked out the front door.
“Rae.” Zach’s voice froze her feet to the ground.
She couldn’t turn around. Facing him again would hurt too much, and her grip on her composure was almost gone. “What?”
“You’re really doing this.”
She tried to keep her response steady. “I have to.”
“You don’t.” The two words were heavy. “Scott will get over whatever his issue is. If you really think it’s best, you don’t have to work for us. Don’t go.”
Why couldn’t he just let her leave? Her resolve weakened every moment she stood there. She blinked back the tears, and faced him. “It’s not just about Scott. Or who is or isn’t working with you.” Each word was more painful than the last.
His blue eyes were clouded with hurt. “Then explain it to me.”
She threw up her hands, as frustrated with her lack of words as with his persistence. “It’s everything. I’m already a part of it, and if I stay, that won’t change. I’ll get sucked in again, because that’s what happens.”
She was unable to stop the words flowing from her. “And then we’ll break up. It’ll suck. It’ll devour at least one of us. Worse than it is now. And even though stuff like that happens all the time, it usually doesn’t involve multimillion-dollar companies. You don’t want another Kelly, and even though I don’t plan on screwing any
one over, we’re already proving none of us is mature enough to keep our personal lives and work separate.”
His brow knit together. “What makes you so sure you and I are doomed?”
“Really?” She couldn’t keep the disbelief from her voice. “We couldn’t even tell people we were dating. You still keep yourself closed off. We can be baring our souls, and you’ll just randomly hold something back. That doesn’t bode well for our future together.”
He stared back, lips drawn in a tight line, not moving or speaking. The seconds ticked away.
Did he expect her to say something? She’d pretty much spewed it all. She wasn’t going to babble just to fill the air.
Finally he shook his head. “Got it. Have a nice life.” He turned away, marched back to the house, and then yanked open the front door.
It slammed shut behind him, glass rattling in the frame. Rae forced herself to make it to her car and then leave the driveway, before she started sobbing. When she was out of view of the house, she pulled over and let the tears have their way. She shook as grief and regret pounded over her.
Chapter Twenty
One Year Later
“Your next appointment is waiting for you.”
Rae smiled at her assistant, Alice. Odd that the potential client wasn't in the waiting room. Maybe whoever it was had wanted some privacy for a phone call or something. “Thanks. Who am I seeing?”
Alice checked her computer. “Rinslet Enterprises. They're looking for distribution channels.”
The name tickled something in the back of her mind, but she couldn't grasp it. The appointment was status quo. “Do we have lunch reservations anywhere?”
Alice blushed. “I'll get you something.”
That was a strange reaction. “Thanks.”
Rae stepped into her office, letting the door swing shut behind her when she saw her guest. Her feet stuck to the floor. It can’t be.
His Long Shot Page 15
