by Harlow Grace
A warm glow spread over my cheeks. “Oh, um . . . I’m going with Seth.”
“Seth Matthews? The guy who took over from me as team captain?” He rubbed his chin while a small frown settled between his brows. “Watch out for him, Layla. He’s a lady’s man and not one too shy to brag about his conquests in the bedroom. I wish you could hear how he talks about the girls he’s been with.” Grayson seemed really agitated so I just gave him a sweet smile.
“Oh really? He doesn’t come across that way in science class. He’s really nice. We usually work together on projects.” I bit my bottom lip, a little unnerved by Grayson’s words.
Okay, honestly? I was planning to give up my v-card to Seth Matthews. I’d based my decision on logic. I’d heard other girls talk and apparently he was a sex god. I mean, who in their right minds wouldn’t want their fist time to be with the guy who had taken more girl’s virginity than anyone else? Seth had by far the most points on his score card and to my logical brain it simply meant that he knew what he was doing and he was good at it.
It was about time. Being twenty-one and still a goddamn virgin wasn’t something I had particularly planned, it just happened because . . . well, other things were more important.
Admittedly I was more than a little shocked when Seth asked me to be his date since he had so many other girls to choose from, but I’d hoped it was because we got on so well in class. I didn’t treat him any differently than I treated any other guy—not like most girls who melted when he looked in their direction.
Yeah, it was cliché to give it up on prom night, but since I’d missed that opportunity four years ago at high school, I wanted it over and done with this time. This ball was my chance to finally get rid of my virginity—I was going into it with eyes wide open.
Up until this point I’d ‘saved’ myself for the right guy. Problem was, I’d turned twenty-one a few weeks ago and not yet met a single male who was even remotely right for me. Maybe it was because I set my damn standards so high. Henry Cavil . . . or Grayson Forbes. In my eyes they were the only two men I really thought were worthy. For obvious reasons neither were exactly available as husband material.
Logically—and I was as logical and rational a thinker as any woman could be—Seth was the perfect candidate. He’d know what to do.
Yet a tiny part of me was scared. Scared that it would be a disaster.
Grayson’s inquiring gaze searched my face. His jaw locked as a small vein ticked in his neck. “Don’t become a notch on his belt, Lala. You’re better than that.”
Holy hell. He can read my mind?
And when he called me Lala, his special name for me, I just melted. Every. Single. Time.
I quickly looked away, trying to save face as warmth crept over my chest and neck. I willed it to stop spreading to my cheeks, but of course, I failed dismally. Grayson, my best friend besides Sloane, knew what my plans were without me saying a word and he clearly didn’t approve.
Sloane on the other hand thought it was a brilliant idea. For her first time having sex, she’d been mauled by a horny boy who had no fucking idea how to use his tools properly and she swore it was one of the worst experiences of her life. I was determined to not go down the same route as her.
“Um . . . I don’t think I should be discussing my date with my stepbrother. I know you just want what’s best for me, Grayson, but you have to let me make my own decisions. Same for Taylor. You’re so damn overprotective sometimes it can be—”
“Annoying?” A frown formed between his lush eyebrows. “I care about you. I don’t want you to get hurt by some lame jock who only wants bragging rights. Your first time . . . it should be so much more.”
“How do you know I’m still a virgin?” I shrieked.
God, was it that damn obvious?
“You told me you’d never been kissed before. Remember the night we talked till three am and then fell asleep in front of the fireplace?”
“Yeah, but that was ages ago. What makes you think it hasn’t changed by now? You’ve been away for a whole semester you know. I could’ve—”
He pressed his fingertips to my lips. “Don’t.”
Still frowning, he peered down at me through thick black lashes, the blue around his eyes nearly black.
“Don’t what?” I asked as I drew in a shaky breath. Why was the way he was looking at me making my stomach twist in a way I’d never felt before?
Dropping his fingers from my mouth, he picked up my hand from my lap and squeezed it.
Sweet Jesus, this is intense.
My heart beat so loudly I wondered if he could hear it.
“Don’t throw yourself at a boy who doesn’t deserve you. Promise me.”
Squirming under his penetrating gaze, I cast my eyes down while thinking of an answer. No way in hell would I lie to Grayson, yet I couldn’t tell him the truth either. The warmth of my cheeks turned into a raging fire. I could probably fry eggs on them, they were that hot.
“Henry Cavil isn’t available.” I smiled sheepishly, trying to make light of the tingling in my veins. “And Seth really is very nice to me. You have nothing to worry about.”
He cleared his throat and let go of my hand. I felt the loss of his closeness, it was as if he was not only taking a step backward physically, but also mentally.
“I just don’t want to see you get hurt. What I’ve seen of Seth is different to how you’ve seen him. At the time I just ignored him because he was so much younger than me . . . and I had no idea he was going to target you. If I’d known then, I would’ve smashed his balls in.”
My eyes widened. I'd never heard Grayson speak like that about anyone. Staring at him wide eyed and with my mouth gaping, I wasn’t sure what to make of it.
“Um, I’m pretty sure I’m capable of looking after myself. And I’m not discussing my sex life with you either. That’s just wrong on so many levels, eww.” I wrinkled my nose at him. “You’ve never said one single thing about a girl to me . . . ever. So why don’t we just keep that part to ourselves, huh?”
He grabbed me by the shoulders, pressing hard into my skin. “That’s because there aren’t any girls to talk about. I've not met a single one at school or uni who does it for me.”
My hand flew to cover my mouth. “God. You’re not telling me you’re gay, are you?” What a waste. Grayson was such a beautiful man—he should have at least half a dozen babies, cloned to perfection.
Laughing straight from his belly, he shook his head. “Fuck, no. Not that I have anything against homosexuality at all. Some of my best friends are gay. They make damn good doctors.”
I sucked in a breath. Was Grayson pining for a lost love? Why was I burning to know? Why had a sudden pang of jealousy speared my heart?
“It's complicated. You wouldn’t understand.” He reached out and tucked a wayward strand of hair behind my ear with a melancholic smile twisting his lips.
Why couldn’t Grayson be . . .
No. God, no. Stop those dirty thoughts right there.
5: Layla
“Layla, indulge me just this once. Make me a happy woman.” Mum had the typical steely tone to her voice that warned me I wasn’t going to win this round easily. My lack of style had irked her for years, and she was insisting that I needed a makeover. Thanks to ample elbow ribbing from Sloane, I rolled my eyes and gave in to the extravagance.
“The two of you are exhausting. I don’t want a dress that wears me. Find something plainer and more comfortable.”
“You really are a silly girl not listening to your mother, Layla. God, I wish mine wanted to go shopping and spend a small fortune on me.” Sloane was genuinely pissed off that I’d refused to try on a two thousand dollar dress. I was equally as pissed.
Two thousand dollars. Who spends that on a dress they will most likely never wear again?
The amount of cash wasted on fancy occasions was ridiculous. When hair, make-up, shoes, corsages, limos and all the rest were thrown in, it all added up to a small fortun
e. Money I could think of far better uses for. But then I was reminded that so many people’s livelihoods depended on feeding human’s egos and helping them feel good about themselves, that I decided to stop resisting and just go with the flow.
“How about this?” Sloane held a dress in front of her, grinning as if she’d hit the jackpot.
I shook my head to the elaborate silver gown strewn with diamantes and a deep plunging neckline. “Exclude anything my boobs are going to fall out of.”
“That’s what double sided tape was made for, Hon.” she said, sulking that I didn’t like her choice of dress.
“That dress would look awesome on you though, Sloane. Why don’t you try it on?” The wide grin was back on her face instantly. If only people wouldn’t pick dresses out that suited them better than they would me.
Turning back to the task at hand, I flicked through the rack of gowns with waists so small I was sure they were meant for supermodels who lived solely on green leaves and dust.
“I refuse to have to hold my breath all night or not be able to eat anything,” I said grimacing, shooting Mum a warning look as she held up a slinky see-through number.
Mum had always wanted a daughter like Taylor—or Sloane. A pretty little girly-girl she could dress up in frilly frocks and blingy shoes. Her disappointment that I preferred jeans, t-shirts and ponytails had thankfully been relieved when she found a stepdaughter with similar tastes to go shopping with her. But today she was determined to make me go through the whole damn process.
“Layla, you’re making this very difficult, you know,” Mum said, her agitation visible as she returned the dress to the rack.
I was probably the only girl in the universe who wasn’t excited by designer names and didn’t know what the latest season trends were. Just thinking about it hurt my head, they changed so suddenly and I couldn’t remember the names for ordinary colors that suddenly sounded so fancy. Chartreuse was just plain lime green to me.
Shrugging, I let out a long sigh. “There’s definitely nothing here I’d feel comfortable wearing. Let's go to lunch instead. I’m hungry and tired.”
Mum looked at her watch. “We’ll eat in half an hour. Grayson is picking Taylor up from school and they’re joining us for lunch at Tony’s.”
“Tony’s? Why didn’t you say so earlier? I love that place.” Suddenly I felt a hell of a lot better.
Sloane raised a perfect eyebrow. “Grayson’s going to be there? Great.”
Mum rolled her eyes at me. “I hope your stepsister can persuade you to pick a suitable dress. I don’t know why you’d rather take fashion advise from a sixteen year old than me, but if it's going to make the whole process easier, I’m all for it.”
I gave her a little hug. “I’m sorry Mum. I know I don’t quite live up to your expectations of a daughter, but yeah, Taylor somehow understands me better. She just has a natural eye for what suits me. She’d never suggest I wear something that she’d like to wear.”
It was mean of me to add a little dig, but Mum always did that to me. She chose dresses for me that she’d look fabulous in but that did absolutely nothing for me. I had my father’s build, I was curvy and of average height, big boned by fashion standards. Definitely not tall and plank thin like my mother. I hadn’t inherited a single trait from her. If she hadn’t told me how much I reminded her of my dad so many times, I would’ve sworn I’d been switched at the hospital.
Just before we left the boutique, both Mum and Sloane applied fresh lipstick. I watched for a few seconds as they checked their hair in the mirror too. If only I cared what I looked like, I would’ve joined them.
My stomach rumbled. “Hurry up. I’m hungry.”
Sloane smacked her bright pink lips together. “Oh, we’re ready to go.”
Impatient, I checked my watch. “We’re running late. Taylor and Grayson will be waiting.”
Sloane’s eyes lit up. Was it because she knew Grayson was coming too? She’d never said so directly, but I could tell she had a crush on him. Not that I could blame her. Grayson was perfect in every way, even down to his slightly crooked nose because, well, it’s just what made him Grayson.
For a moment I imagined my two best friends as a couple. They'd be really cute together. Sloane was blonde, like Mum and Taylor. She was stunning too, nothing mousy or boring about her; she wore her skin comfortably. She could’ve easily pulled off any one of the dresses in this overpriced shop.
A pang of envy that twisted my gut. What was I jealous of? Her flawless beauty or that she could legitimately be Grayson’s girlfriend? Come to think of it, she had taken extra care with her hair and make-up ever since Grayson came home. And she’d been hanging out at mine a lot more than usual. Why had it taken me five days to work this out?
Suddenly I wasn’t as hungry any more. Not that I wouldn’t be happy for them if they got together, but there was just something about it that didn’t sit well with me.
Stop being a bitch. They'd be perfect for one another.
I’d always get to hang out with my two best friends, what could be better?
Thirty minutes later, we walked into the café my mother loved to frequent. Mum stopped at a few tables along the way to our table to greet her friends. She probably knew half of the people in the place.
Doesn’t anyone work like regular people?
The place was buzzing, clearly a favorite lunch spot for friends to catch up. It was pretty noisy too, with people laughing and chatting loudly.
I spotted Grayson first. He was smiling at us as we approached, but I couldn’t see his eyes through his sunglasses. My stomach did a little flip as I noticed the dark stubble on his chin and the way his hair was styled in that perfect messy as-if-someone-had-just-run-their-hands-through-it way. He wore dark blue jeans and a long sleeved shirt that matched his eyes, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. God, he had the sexiest forearms I'd ever seen on a man. Strong, muscled, with thick veins protruding ever so slightly. A sure sign of his masculinity.
It was Sloane who reached him first. “Hi, Grayson. Awesome, you came to our rescue. I’m starving.” She walked straight into his open arms and kissed him on the cheek. By the way she blushed and the slight trembling of her hands, I knew she was more than delighted to see him.
Grayson pulled her into a hug, both hands spread out over her back. He looked so relaxed and happy that I couldn’t help swallowing hard. Was it because of Sloane that his grin was so wide?
“Hey, Sloane. Wow, you look lovely today,” Grayson said, his eyes glistening as he beamed at her.
“Hello, Grayson. Where’s Taylor?” Mum asked, allowing him to kiss her on the cheek.
He laughed and tilted his head to the right in the direction of the bathrooms. “She went to the ladies room. I think she’s getting rid of the school uniform. Apparently it’s not cool.”
“Oh. Actually I need to go too. Excuse me.” I mumbled as I tried to slip past Grayson unnoticed.
“Hey you,” Grayson said, grabbing hold of my wrist and pulling me toward him. “Don’t I get hello?”
“Hello, Grayson. I was just waiting my turn. Seems you’re popular today.” I chuckled awkwardly.
While I’d been standing there I couldn’t help noticing that just about every female in the place had their gazes trained on the tall handsome man who seemed to unknowingly command the room. I’d seen the way some women had flashed their pearly whites at him and others had fluttered their eyelashes. Just as well he was studying to be a pediatrician and not a gynecologist. But then again, every kid had a mother.
His manly scent of soap and woody spices drifted to my nostrils as he pulled me into a hug. I snuggled against him for a few seconds, enjoying the sense of warmth and security I always felt in his arms. He planted a kiss into my hair, and a small groan rumbled from his chest.
Flustered, I took a quick step backward. “Ladies room,” I muttered. I didn’t need to pee as such but what I needed was a breather. The whole day had been somewhat overwhelming
so far.
I needed space to clear my head. Lots of space, but the ladies room would have to do for now.
6: Layla
As I rounded the corner approaching the bathroom, a child stumbled and fell just outside the doorway. Carmen! What was she doing there and where was her mother?
I ran to where she was on the floor, crying her heart out. Crutching down to her level, I spoke to her softly. “Carmen, sweetheart, it’s me, Layla.”
“Layla,” she wailed. “Help me.”
I placed my hand on her cheek, lifting her tear streaked face to mine. “It’s okay sweetie, I’ve got you.”
I hugged her to my chest, searching for signs of either of her parents. Stroking her hair gently, I wanted to calm her down before I helped her up.
“Where’s Mum?” I asked as soon as her sobs started to subside. I couldn’t believe neither of them had shown up yet. Surely they wouldn’t have let her go to the bathroom by herself? It was ridiculous to even thinking of it. Carmen needed months more of therapy before she’d be okay to go anywhere unaided.
“Mum left me with my uncle. She had to go to the doctor. Uncle Tim said if I wanted to go to the bathroom I had to go by myself because he isn’t a girl.” Tears started streaming down her face again. “I tried real hard, Layla. But my legs got so tired and I fell down. My uncle’s going to shout at me.”
I stroked up and down her arms to calm her. “No, he won’t,” I said, soothing her. “Don’t you worry, sweetie. I’ll talk to Uncle Tim, okay?”
Talk? I was going to freaking chew him out for this. What the hell was the man thinking?
“I did good didn’t I? I made it all the way to the ladies room by myself.” I loved how she was seeing the positive in this even though she’d fallen down. At least her spirit was still strong in spite of everything she had endured since a drunk driver had smashed into her side of the car. At least she was still alive, even though her life would never be the same.
“Yes, you did, Carmen. In a few more weeks you’ll be okay to walk there and back by yourself. You did so well, I’m so proud of you.”
