‘Later!’ Jodi blew him a kiss.
Mr Matthews was on the floor making a Lego house with a couple of the children. ‘Are you going to the welcome coffee upstairs?’ he asked.
‘Yeah,’ Jodi said, ‘though it’s not a great morning for it.’
‘Carry on with that, guys, and I’ll be back in a moment,’ Mr Matthews said. Standing up, he walked Jodi to the door.
‘I’ve really messed up,’ Jodi admitted. ‘I just bumped into a couple of the other mums and they’re dressed to kill. I look like I got dressed in the dark. I’m mortified.’
‘Just be yourself. Nobody can argue with that.’
‘I guess,’ Jodi said. Inwardly she balked. Of all the things she was going to be at the coffee morning, herself was not one of them. She had spent the last few years hiding the true Jodi Ludlum from the world. Now she wasn’t even sure who she was any longer.
As she went up the stairs towards the hall, she could hear the murmur of voices. It sounded like there were already quite a few women there. She peered into the room and jumped backwards in fright as Jane appeared from behind the door, like a genie from a lamp. ‘Welcome, do come in. I’ve so many mothers for you to meet,’ she said, balancing a massive tin teapot in her hands.
‘Thanks,’ Jodi said, feeling sick with nerves. She glanced around the room. It looked like a casting for the role of First Lady to the President of the United States. She’d never seen so many strings of pearls, pencil skirts and satin blouses in one place. Francine was in an oatmeal trouser suit with taupe court shoes and more diamonds than a Tiffany window display. Jodi went over to her. ‘I’m a bit too scruffy for this,’ she began. ‘I’ve a magazine shoot this morning and my hair and makeup team are arriving shortly so I didn’t bother to dress up. Maybe I should go.’
‘No!’ Francine stopped beside her with the enormous urn she was hauling around. ‘Please don’t. Everyone wants to chat to you.’
Lots of the women turned to look at Jodi. Right at that moment, she felt like she was seven again. She was almost expecting someone to point and sneer – Look at Gyppo Jodi in her tracksuit. With all her money you’d think she’d manage to look better.
‘Hi, Jodi! Over here!’ Andrea called, and pulled at the front of her linen skirt uncomfortably.
‘Hi,’ Jodi said, wanting to die.
‘Hi, Jodi,’ Sarah said. ‘You look a million dollars. I feel like your granny in my twin set. I thought I was doing the classic look but beside you I’m a total fuddy-duddy.’
‘Apologies for turning up looking like a tramp. I’ll know better the next time. You girls are setting the stakes seriously high. I’ll have to get some clothes sent over from LA to keep up with you.’
The women chuckled good-naturedly and assured Jodi she looked fantastic.
The atmosphere in the room was curious. All the women were air-kissing and most of them seemed to know at least one group. But, just like some Hollywood events, they were chatting amicably while simultaneously scanning the room and taking in exactly what the others were doing.
‘This is my first taste of being a school mum,’ Jodi said hesitantly. ‘I’m sure I’ve got a lot to learn. I’ll have to get with the plot or Saul is going to be mortified by me!’
‘I don’t think so,’ Jane assured her. ‘You’re the coolest mum here!’
‘I’m not so sure,’ Jodi said, laughing. Inwardly she thought she was going to pass out. This was as scary as her first audition had been all those years ago. Except today she wasn’t looking for a part in a movie. Now she needed to fit in to give Saul the secure home she’d never had.
‘I’m trussed up like a pig on a spit, poured into magic knickers, thigh-slimming tights, push-up bra and heels so high I have to lean against the wall or I’ll fall over,’ Jane was saying, ‘and you’re as cool as a cucumber and looking stunning.’
‘You put me to shame,’ Jodi said.
‘You look fantastic, Jane,’ Andrea said loyally.
‘I look like a bleeding drag queen. Your skin is immaculate, Jodi. Do you have Botox and fillers and all that sort of stuff?’ Jane asked leaning in.
‘Eh, well, no …’ Jodi hadn’t been expecting that sort of question.
‘Jesus, Jane, don’t ask her things like that.’ Andrea had turned a deep red.
‘You don’t have to answer, Jodi. Don’t mind her.’
‘Yes, Jane is known for being outspoken,’ Sarah said, glaring at her friend.
‘I’m only saying what you’re all thinking,’ Jane said, unconcerned. ‘And your waist is the same size as the top of one of my arms. Do you eat food?’
‘Of course I do! Did you think I was tube fed?’ Jodi giggled. She was really starting to enjoy this woman.
‘You hear such mad stuff about A-listers and how they live.’
‘I drink horrible herbal infusions and have to work out when I’m taking on roles,’ Jodi explained. ‘But I tend to go around in this sort of gear with no makeup when I’m off. It would be nice to dress up a bit sometimes, when it’s not a work thing, and I’ll make more effort next time, I promise. You all look like you’re really enjoying this. It’s very civilised.’
‘Do you think?’ Jane deadpanned. ‘I reckon we’ve all been bamboozled into conforming because everyone else does it.’
‘What do you mean?’ Andrea asked.
‘Well, seeing Jodi walk in here wearing comfy clothes has made me think,’ Jane said, and turned to her. ‘I feel like a total twat beside you. Sorry, but I do.’
‘Why? You’re certainly your own woman,’ she said. ‘I find your attitude very refreshing!’
‘Thanks, but I’m an imposter, really. I’m going home to a bedroom that looks like it was ransacked by looters. I had to get up half an hour earlier to plaster myself in makeup and I spent forty euro having my hair blow-dried and teased to within an inch of its life yesterday. My mother had to come and mind the kids and she let them eat jellies so I scraped their dinner into the bin and ended up screaming like a fish wife.’ Jane folded her arms. ‘For what? To impress other women or, if I’m totally honest, to compete with them? Just so I don’t feel like a sad, ageing Hausfrau?’
‘You’re not sad. It’s lovely to go to coffee mornings and relax and chat to other mothers,’ Andrea said, without conviction.
‘Are you honestly relaxed right now?’ Jane asked. ‘’Cause I’m not. You could sharpen a pencil if you stuck it up my arse because I’m so uptight.’
‘Jane!’ Andrea looked shocked. ‘That’s very rude.’
Jodi burst out laughing.
‘Yup. It is.’ Jane grinned. ‘I used to be fun, you know, a hundred years ago when I worked in a chain store and drank what was left of my wages after I’d bought more new clothes.’
‘But you were young and foolish then,’ Andrea said, blinking in dismay. ‘You’re a mother and a wife now. Your life has moved on.’
‘Has it?’ Jane mused. ‘Or has it kind of ended in a sad and dull way? Are we just like clones of one another, all shuffling through a mundane existence? Is this it? What are we going to do when the kids have left school? When we have no hall to stand in talking crap? What then?’
‘If you feel so strongly about it all, just wear a tracksuit and stop being so negative,’ Andrea said. ‘Jane, you must be having a midlife crisis. If you’re not careful, you may find yourself being left off the list when the next luncheon is organised. Now, excuse me, ladies, but I’d better go and mingle with some of the new mums. Someone needs to make them feel welcome,’ she said, shooting Jane a filthy look. ‘Excuse me, Jodi.’
‘Sure,’ Jodi said.
‘Looks like I’m in deep shit, doesn’t it?’ Jane winked.
‘You should probably behave yourself or you’ll be put in the naughty corner,’ Jodi agreed.
‘Do you want to come and do a quick meet-and-greet with me, then slip away?’ she offered.
‘That’d be great,’ Jodi agreed. She could see Francine out of the corner of h
er eye, cutting cakes and milling around, and felt stung that the other woman hadn’t greeted her. When she and Jane practically walked into her, Francine stopped to speak.
‘All going okay for you?’ she asked.
‘Yes, thanks. Jane is great fun.’
‘Yeah, in small doses.’ Francine lowered her voice as Jane was distracted talking to another mother. ‘She tends to get hideously drunk at evening events. She’s been known to let herself down on more than one occasion.’ Francine shook her head. ‘She’s done it all from the can-can on the dinner table to falling in a heap off her chair and knocking herself out on the leg of the table.’
‘Oh, right.’ Jodi stifled a giggle.
‘Yeah, she’s on thin ice with some of the ladies. She’s actually in danger of being ostracised by some of the more old-fashioned members of the community.’
Jodi certainly wasn’t a fan of drunks. She’d seen enough of what booze could do to last her a lifetime. But she found Jane very funny.
‘Are you all right?’ Jodi asked Francine, lowering her voice. ‘Yes, of course. I’m fine,’ Francine replied abruptly. ‘Excuse me, Jodi. I’d better go and see to the other new mothers.’
As she walked away, Jodi felt cold inside. She’d thought she and Francine had bonded the other day. Now it appeared she was wrong. Everyone in her life seemed to do this to her, except Darius.
She edged towards the door and had just gone out when Francine was behind her. ‘You’re not leaving so soon, are you?’ she asked, looking nervous.
‘I’ve to head back. I’ve a photo shoot at the cottage,’ Jodi said.
‘Listen, I’m sorry if I was off with you. I’d like to make amends about what happened between Cameron and Saul. Would he come and play for a little while this afternoon?’
Jodi knew Darius’s views on Saul playing with Cameron. She also thought of how upset her poor little boy had been after all the trouble. Saul wasn’t able for Cameron’s wild behaviour. ‘Thanks for the offer but he wants to be with Darius. He’s here for the photos, but it’s only a flying visit.’
‘But you’ll be busy with the pictures,’ Francine persisted. ‘I’ll collect him and you can call me when it’s all over and I’ll drop him home. Please. It’ll make me feel better.’
‘As I said, Francine, thank you for the offer but he’d prefer to come home today,’ Jodi said firmly.
‘I insist.’ Francine’s smile didn’t falter.
Jodi felt quite confused. Was the woman not hearing what she’d said? ‘Another day I’ll take you up on the offer. But not today.’ She tried not to sound snappy.
‘Fine. Forget I said it. Sorry to have offended you,’ Francine said. ‘I only wanted to organise a nice afternoon for Cameron. He’s been struggling a lot lately.’
Jodi felt terrible for the poor child. She couldn’t help it. She still remembered so clearly how it felt to be the one nobody wanted to play with. She was making such a mess of this. She’d never fit in at Bakers Valley if she didn’t start to make some friends.
‘Francine,’ she said.
‘Yes?’
‘Thank you for the offer. I have to be honest and tell you Saul is a little nervous of Cameron. He’s a very gentle soul. But if you could keep an eye on the horseplay and general behaviour, I’m sure the boys will have a fun time together.’
‘Great.’
Fresh guilt washed over Jodi as she pictured Saul’s little face. He’d freak if she wasn’t there to collect him at home time. Dashing back down the stairs, Jodi tapped on the classroom door. ‘Sorry to interrupt, Mr Matthews, but could I just speak to Saul for one second?’ she asked.
‘Come on in.’
Jodi was delighted to find her little boy painting happily at a miniature easel in a corner. Little voices mixed with busy clattering made for a lovely joyful atmosphere.
‘Hi, Mum!’ Saul was clearly thrilled to see her. ‘I’m painting us in our new house with Dad.’
‘That’s just the coolest thing ever!’ Jodi said. ‘Maybe you could let Dad take that back to the movie set with him?’
‘So when he misses us he can look at my picture,’ Saul agreed.
‘Listen, dude, Francine is going to pick you up today and mind you for a little while. Won’t that be fun? You’ll get to go to Cameron’s house!’ Jodi tried to look enthusiastic.
‘Oh.’ Saul looked confused.
‘It won’t be for long, I promise,’ she whispered. ‘I know you want to play with Dad, huh?’
‘Okay, Mum, as long as Cameron promises to be good,’ he whispered back.
Jodi felt like crying. ‘He will, honey. And it’ll only be for a short time. If you want to come home just tell Francine and we’ll come and get you, okay?’
‘Okay. Bye, Mum.’ Saul waved his paintbrush at her.
‘You survived the mothers’ meeting unscathed, I see,’ Mr Matthews commented, as she walked past.
‘Just about! Ah they’re a decent bunch. They’re very friendly.’
‘It can be a bit intimidating when you don’t know anyone, though. I felt like a neon sign in the desert when I walked into the village pub the first time.’
‘Ha!’ Jodi laughed. ‘I like your imagery.’
Mr Matthews grinned. ‘Well if you ever need to compare “newbie” notes, just let me know.’
‘Oh, thanks,’ Jodi said distractedly. ‘I’d better run. Apologies again for bursting in!’
‘No problem at all. Any time.’
As she sped home, Jodi felt uneasy. She wasn’t comfortable with Francine taking Saul. She shouldn’t have agreed to it. Jodi also felt hurt that the woman had been so off with her. Darius was always telling her to make more friends, to try to meet a new man. But how could she? Each time she tried to open up to someone it seemed to go pear-shaped.
She hadn’t much time to ponder on it all once she got back to the cottage. The hair and makeup team swarmed around her the second she entered the house. Gorgeous clothes were pulled from clear plastic packaging and held up against her face. ‘We need to make sure the look stays very daytime,’ the stylist said, dismissing a short black dress.
Darius appeared in jeans and an indigo checked shirt. ‘Wow, you look stunning,’ Jodi exclaimed. ‘That colour is amazing on you, sweetie.’
‘You like?’ Darius twirled slowly.
‘God, I should’ve married you,’ Jodi quipped. ‘Oh, hang on a minute – I did!’
The team giggled and lapped up the saccharine banter between the couple. Jodi winked at Darius when she was sure nobody was looking.
‘Good one, darling,’ Darius whispered in her ear. ‘The perfect cement to put the kybosh on any rumours that my latest love rat may decide to send out there.’
‘Nobody will believe him,’ Jodi whispered back.
Jodi and Darius had a name within the industry for being really down to earth. The public loved them, but so too did the business moguls who came into contact with them. Everyone from runners to producers sang their praises. Neither ever played the diva or behaved disrespectfully.
‘They’re so cute together too,’ the hairdresser’s assistant was muttering to her friend on the phone, as the photographers began to snap.
Once things got going the time flew, so Jodi was surprised when her mobile rang flashing up Francine’s number.
‘Hey, Francine,’ Jodi said. ‘How’s everything?’
The line was very crackly and Jodi had to strain to hear the other woman.
‘I’m sorry, Francine, we’re outside and my neighbour is cutting corn so the noise and wind aren’t helping.’
‘Saul is a little tearful so he’d like me to drop him home now,’ Francine was saying.
‘Oh, no!’ Jodi said. ‘Will I come over?’
‘Not at all. We’ll be there shortly.’
‘Okay, if you’re sure, that’d be great,’ Jodi shouted, above the noise. ‘We’re out the back but I mightn’t be able to stop and chat,’ she apologised in advance.
; ‘I’ll just drop him and fly,’ Francine said brusquely.
‘Thank you,’ Jodi said, but the other woman had already hung up.
‘Over this way, please, Jodi!’ the photographer called. ‘Makeup! Can you dab just to the left of her nose? That shine isn’t flattering!’
The combine harvester droned on behind them as the shoot continued.
‘We’re nearly there. Just a few more shots, please, guys,’ the stylist announced.
Moments later, Saul appeared around the back of the house. Jodi and Darius both waved and called to him.
‘Stunning shot! Brilliant!’ the photographer encouraged. Saul plopped on to the ground, crossed his legs and rested his sullen face on his hands.
‘Hi, Monster Man!’ Darius called. ‘How you doing?’
‘I didn’t have a very good time today.’
‘Was school not fun?’
‘It was the after bit that was yucky.’
‘Give us a few more minutes and we’ll have a catch-up,’ Darius promised. ‘I want to hear all about your day.’
Saul’s attention was taken by the combine harvester, which was hurtling towards the garden. He jumped up and climbed to the top of the fence. He waved, and was thrilled when Sebastian waved back.
‘Sebastian!’ Saul shouted.
The machine stopped and Sebastian climbed down.
‘Hi, Sebastian,’ Jodi called. ‘We’re nearly finished here. This is my husband, Darius.’
‘How’s it going?’ Darius said, waving at the other man. ‘Hello,’ Sebastian said evenly. ‘Will I take Saul to the farm for a few minutes to keep him out of trouble?’
‘What do you think?’ Jodi asked.
‘Wow!’ Saul said, looking much more cheerful.
‘Thanks, Sebastian,’ Jodi said. ‘I owe you one.’
Saul flung himself over the fence and ran to him.
‘Come on, and we’ll see how the cows are doing. They love having visitors, you know. I’m certain they cheered up after you chatted to them last time,’ said Sebastian. Saul giggled.
‘He’ll be made up,’ Jodi said to Darius. ‘This is all part of the reason I knew he needed to come here. You’d never have an experience like that in Palm Beach or the middle of London.’
Perfect Wives Page 12
