by Graham Seal
Reg Ansett entered Australian folklore in various ways, but particularly in a story often told about him by friend and foe alike. According to the yarn, a young man was keen to make a name for himself in business, just like the then ageing but incredibly eminent Reg Ansett. The young bloke couldn’t believe his luck when he was in a restaurant for a meeting with an important client and he spotted Reg at a table full of other prominent business people, obviously settled in for a long session. Summoning up his courage, he approached the table and nervously addressed the great man, asking for a moment of his time and for a bit of a leg up the slippery ladder of business. Magnanimously, Reg condescended to help out and asked what he could do.
‘Well, Mr Ansett,’ said the young man, ‘I have a very important client coming to lunch with me today. I need to impress this person with my business ideas and also with my contacts. Would you be kind enough to pretend that you know me?’
‘Sure,’ agreed Reg, mildly amused at the effrontery of the young man and probably reminded of his own early days.
‘Thank you so much,’ gushed the young man. ‘When I leave the restaurant with my client I’ll come past your table. Would you be good enough to stand up and greet me as if I were a valued business colleague?’
Reg was bit taken aback, but he was in a good mood over his latest business deal. ‘Okay, young fella,’ he replied condescendingly, always happy to give a newcomer a helping hand.
Reg went back to his celebrations and the young man returned to his table to meet his client. When the meal was over, Reg and his mates were still hard at it. The young man paid the bill and carefully manoeuvred himself and his client to pass right next to Reg’s table. Reg couldn’t miss them and remembered that he had agreed to take part in the harmless deception. He got to his feet and enthusiastically held out his hand to the young man, saying, ‘Good to see you again, how’s business?’
The young man stopped, looked coldly at the great man and said, ‘Piss off, Reg, you can see I’m busy.’
The end of a perfect day
Pigs do not fly, of course, but in the world of work they can—and sometimes must—be made to do so:
Another day ends…
All targets met
All systems in working order
All customers satisfied
All staff eager and enthusiastic
All pigs fed and ready to fly
Sources
1. THE WIDE BROWN LAND
Eaglehawk and Crow: Thomas, 1923. William Jenkyn Thomas (1870–1959) was a Welsh school master who wrote The Welsh Fairy Book as well as some educational texts. Unfortunately, he gives no sources for the stories he includes in his book, which was intended for a general audience and probably, given his profession, as a teaching resource. See also Berndt & Berndt, 1989.
Great floods: Smith, 1930, pp. 151–68. This is Smith’s edited version of a story collected and written down by Aboriginal writer, activist, inventor and man on the $50 note, David Unaipon. Unaipon gave his work to Smith, a noted anthropologist, and Smith published it under his own name without acknowledging Unaipon. Smith’s version is much shorter than Unaipon’s but preserves the essential details of the story. David Unaipon’s original collection was finally published by Melbourne University Publishing in 2001, edited by Stephen Muecke and Adam Shoemaker, who were instrumental in uncovering the truth.
Firestick farming: Gammage, 2011.
‘The landscape looked like a park’: Bride, 1899.
Captain Cook’s Law: K. Maddock, ‘Myth, History and a Sense of Oneself ’ in Beckett, 1988, pp. 11–30; Redmond, 2008, pp. 255–70; D. Rose, ‘The Saga of Captain Cook: Remembrance and morality’, in Attwood & Magowan, 2001, pp. 61–79.
The corners: Queensland Heritage Register.
2. UPON THE FATAL SHORE
Leaden hearts: The National Museum of Australia has a large collection of convict tokens. The selected messages reproduced here have had spelling and layout regularised to some degree.
The Ring: Warung, 1891.
The melancholy death of Captain Logan: The ballad is usually credited to the convict Francis MacNamara, though research by Jeff Brownrigg (Brownrigg, 2003) suggests that MacNamara was not the author. See also Meredith & Whalan, 1979, pp. 31–8 and R. Reece, ‘Frank the Poet’ in Davy & Seal, 1993.
A Convict’s Tour to Hell: The poem exists in various manuscript versions, probably composed c. 1839. See MacNamara, 1839.
‘Make it hours instead of days’: Sydney Stock and Station Journal, 1902, p. 3.
Captain of the push: Mitchell Library scrapbook of clippings, 1830; Lawson, 1900.
The Prince of Pickpockets: The Newgate Calendar; Australian Dictionary of Biography: Barrington, George (1755–1804), Argus, 1956.
3. PLAINS OF PROMISE
‘I was not expected to survive’: Moger, 1840; Sarah Brunskill quoted in Haines, 2003. Despite the popular depiction of the Australian emigrant ships as floating hells, government-chartered vessels (the main focus of Robin Haines’ work) delivered more than 98 per cent of their charges to their new land in good health in the period covered by the book.
The town that drowned: Australian Lutheran Almanac, 1939; Flinders Ranges Research.
Wine and witches: There are various, sometimes contradictory versions of these events. See Ioannou, 1997, pp. 63ff and Relative Thoughts, 2009.
Phantoms of the landfall light: Cape Otway Lighthouse.
Tragedy on Lizard Island: Falkiner & Oldfield, 2000; Australian Dictionary of Biography: ‘Watson, Mary Beatrice Phillips (1860–1881). When that site was reclaimed for Central Station in 1904, the remains were transferred to what is now Botany Bay Cemetery, where they still lie. See also McInnes, 1983; Wemyss, 1837; Lahn, 2013; Kennedy, 2011.
Who was Billy Barlow?: Maitland Mercury and Hunter River General Advertiser, 1843; Hildebrand, 2011 (also contains a large number of Billy Barlow ballads).
Chimney Sweeps’ Day: Leech, 1989.
The dragon of Big Gold Mountain: Bendigo Advertiser, 1874, p. 2; Argus, p. 6.
4. A FAIR GO
Black Mary: Wells, 1818; Clarke, 1871.
The Tambaroora line: Beatty, 1960. It is unlikely that the song was Bill Maloney’s, though; see North Queensland Register.
Mates: ‘A Sketch of Mateship’ was published in Lawson, 1907b.
A glorious spree: South Bourke and Mornington Journal, 1879.
The Greenhide Push waltzes Matilda: Magoffin, 1987, pp. 82ff.
The Bunuba resistance: Pederson & Woorunmurra, 1995, p. 49. See also Aboriginal History, 1985, p. 98, note 26; Western Australian Folklore Archive.
The bagman’s gazette: Northern Standard (Darwin), 1931.
Homes of hope: Gibbons, 2012; Australian Dictionary of Biography: ‘Hammond, Robert Brodribb (1870–1946)’.
5. HOW WE TRAVEL THE LAND
Rangers and rouseabouts: Fahey & Seal, 2005.
The swagman’s union: Burra Record, 1931.
The oozlum bird: The first mention of Goodge’s poem is in the Sunday Times (Sydney), 1898. It was published a couple of months later, so he had probably been writing it since 1897.
The Tea and Sugar train: J.D. in Railroad, 1928; Mail (Adelaide), 1925; Barrier Miner (Broken Hill), 1943.
The black stump: oral tradition
The rise and fall of Cobb & Co.: Everingham, 2007.
The Long Paddock: Sydney Morning Herald, 1942.
The real Red Dog: Duckett, 1993.
6. DOING IT TOUGH
Depending on the harvest: Argus, 1880.
‘Women of the West’: Argus, 1901
Cures!: Argus, 1918; Edwards, 1997; fieldwork of Rob Willis.
A seasonal guide to weather and wives: Traditional, also fieldwork of Rob and Olya Willis; Pageant of Humour, 1920, but said to be from 1842 source.
Backyard brainwaves: Australian War Memorial; Ingpen, 1982.
Sugar bag nation: Hindsight, 1999; Lowenstein, 1998; Seal, 1977; Happy Valley: Sydney Morning Herald, 1933.
Sergeant Small: Graham Seal, ‘From Texas to Tamworth via New Zealand: Tex Morton sings an Australian song’, in Dalziell & Genoni, 2013.
The farmer’s will: Author’s collection.
7. HOME OF THE WEIRD
Curious discoveries: Grey, 1841.
The marble man: Maitland Mercury & Hunter River General Advertiser (NSW ), 1889, p. 4. Most of the Australian newspapers, large and small, carried items on the marble man.
Was Breaker Morant the Gatton murderer?: Meredith, 1996.
Vanishing vessels: Jeffreys, 2007; Gregory, 1861, p. 482; WA Maritime Myths, referencing Busselton Historical Society; Gerritsen, 2010; Van Den Boogaerde, 2009, p. 75.
Yearning for yowies: Queanbeyan Age, 1903, p. 2.
8. ROMANCING THE SWAG
Introduction: Sydney Morning Herald, 1869, p. 4.
Lore of the track: Wannan, 1976, p. 196 (from Mr J. Robertson, North Geelong); Townsville Daily Bulletin, 1924, p. 9; Nepean Times, 1933, p. 6.
Sniffling Jimmy: Townsville Daily Bulletin, 1924, p. 9.
The poetic swaggie: Paterson, 1906; Henry Lawson, ‘Hungerford’ in Bulletin, 1893.
‘There you have the Australian swag’: Henry Lawson, ‘The Romance of the Swag’, in Ross, 2011.
A swagman’s death: Morning Bulletin, 1894, p. 5.
Where the angel tarboys fly: Capricornian, 1908 p. 47.
Bowyang Bill and the cocky farmer: Narromine News and Trangie Advocate, 1934, p. 6. ‘Bowyang Bill’ was probably Alexander Vennard, who usually used the byline ‘Bill Bowyang’.
The Mad Eight: News (Adelaide), 1927.
9. AFTER THE KELLYS
The saga: Seal, 2002.
A Glenrowan letter: Sutherland, 1880.
‘I thought it was a circus’: Argus, 1881.
A death in Forbes: Illustrated Australian News, 1880; Forbes & Parkes Gazette, 1898.
Living legends: Argus, 1902.
The stranger: Argus, 1878; Ovens and Murray Advertiser, 1979; Eastman, 1850–52.
10. THE CHILD IN THE BUSH
The beanstalk in the bush: Jacobs, 1890—‘I tell this as it was told me in Australia, somewhere about the year 1860.’
Forgotten nursery rhymes: Nursery rhymes from various sources, including Howitt, 1898; Bulletin, 1898 & 1917.
The lost boys of Daylesford: Daylesford Express, 1867a, 1867b; Sydney Morning Herald, 1867.
Fairies in the paddock: Ernst, 1904. The Snugglepot and Cuddlepie gumnut baby stories were first published in 1918 and have been with us ever since.
Surviving Black Jack: Perth Gazette and Western Australian Journal, 1835, p. 575.
11. LARGER THAN LIFE
The fate of Captain Cadell: Nicholson, 2004.
The Fenian: Evans, 1997, p. 98. See also Sullivan, 2001; O’Reilly, 1879; Hasluck, 1959, p. 75.
The last bushranger: Courier-Mail, 1937, p. 13; Keep in Touch, 2012.
Lawson’s people: Lawson & Brereton, 1931; Roderick, 1982.
The Coo-ee Lady: Richard White, ‘Cooee’, in White & Harper, 2010.
Australia’s first Hollywood Star: McGowan, 2005.
A vision splendid: Murphy & Muller, 1998; author’s collection.
The illywacker: Clarence and Richmond Examiner, 1902, p. 6.
12. WORKING FOR A LAUGH
Droving in a bar: Edwards, 1997, pp. 235–6.
A fine team of bullocks: Anon., author’s collection.
A stump speech: Imperial Songster, 1907.
Working on the railway: Railroad, various editions.
Service!: author’s collection.
High-octane travel: author’s collection.
Rechtub klat: Maddox, 2002.
The garbos’ Christmas: Lindesay, 1988; Scott, 1976.
A Christmas message: Townsville Daily Bulletin, 1924, p. 9.
Total eclipse of communication: author’s collection.
The laws of working life: author’s collection.
Somebody else’s job: author’s collection.
The basic work survival guide: author’s collection.
Twelve things you’ll never hear an employee tell the boss: author’s collection.
Excessive absence: author’s collection.
Running naked with the bulls: Australian Associated Press report, in West Australian, 2002, p. 55.
Doing business: Seal, 2001.
The end of a perfect day: author’s collection.
Bibliography
BOOKS AND MANUSCRIPTS
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Australian Dictionary of Biography, 1976, vol. 6, Melbourne: Melbourne University Press
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Brownrigg, J., 2003, ‘From Bondage… Liberated’: Frank the Poet’s Dreams of Liberty, paper given at ESCAPE (An international and interdisciplinary conference on escape and the convict experience), Strahan, Tasmania, 26–28 June
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Eastman, H.M., c.1850–1852, memoirs (manuscript on microfilm), State Library of NSW, MLMSS 130, B1341
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