Seeing Riley with those kids warmed her heart and pushed her affection for him up a notch. Ooooh…it was dangerous, the way she was feeling. She really wasn’t going to want to let him go on Monday.
The family sat around the picnic table in the Schultz’s backyard. His dad was barbecuing hamburgers and brats. Riley’s mother and sister-in-law started bringing out side dishes. Erin asked Marjorie, “Would you like any help?”
She nodded. All the food they were bringing out was on the kitchen table. There were gallon jugs of iced tea and lemonade and a variety of other foods…coleslaw, baked beans, potato salad, three-bean salad, and potato chips. There were also condiments—ketchup and mustard—as well as paper plates, plastic utensils, and plastic cups. Erin was glad she could make herself useful.
When everyone sat around the table, the family insisted on a group prayer. Out of respect, Erin lowered her head. She and Riley hadn’t discussed religion or politics, but it was evident to Erin that religion was important to his family. Riley seemed indifferent, though, because he grabbed her hand under the table and squeezed it. She peeked over at him and he smiled at her. She smiled back and then looked up when the prayer finished.
While everyone else chatted, mostly about Brian’s job, Erin took the time to assess the family. There was no denying Brian and Riley were brothers. Brian’s hair was more on the copper side, but they had the same jaw, the one they’d inherited from their dad. Brian was about an inch taller, but they had the same build, the same eyes. Brian seemed more serious, but his wife Diane had a quick smile. Erin liked her right off the bat. And their kids were adorable, even the boys, even when they were bickering.
At one point, during a break in the conversation, Riley’s dad said, “Brian, do you think you’d ever be able to get a job for your ne’er-do-well brother here?”
Erin saw Riley stiffen out of the corner of her eye. Oh, Jesus. Riley hadn’t been exaggerating, had he? Brian said, “I don’t know that he’d want work in an oilfield, dad.”
Riley cleared his throat. “And I certainly don’t need it.”
His father’s voice had an edge when he said, “We already talked about this, son. This has been a nice hobby for you, but it’s time to join the rest of us in the grownup world.”
“Dad, I’m in it. I make plenty of money and I’m doing a job I love.”
“Yes, and you’re acting like a juvenile…the long hair and tattoos, drinking, carrying on, doing drugs.”
“Dad, we already talked about this. I don’t do those things anymore.”
His father locked his charcoal eyes onto Erin’s. “Ms. Lancaster, when you teach your high school students about drugs, what are some of the things you tell them to stay away from?”
Oh, no. Erin did not want to be dragged into the middle of the family feud. Besides, she would side with Riley. Yeah, she knew about the heroin and the drinking. So big deal. And she wasn’t going to jump into it. Instead, she said, “Mr. Schultz, that topic is covered by the Phys Ed department. I don’t cover that in English.”
Oh, shit. She hadn’t known Riley’s dad for long, but she could tell she’d just pissed him off. “Hmm. Maybe you’re better suited for Riley than I had at first thought.” What the hell was that supposed to mean? She was going to just let it slide. He then said, “All right, but for argument’s sake, could you humor me? Tell me…would marijuana be considered a drug?”
Erin felt her brows furrow. “Well, of course, it is. While I disagree that it’s not the dangerous drug the DEA makes it out to be, it is illegal, and I wouldn’t want my students smoking it any more than I’d want them drinking alcohol.”
“You know about my son’s drug problems, I assume.”
Erin nodded and set her fork down. Apparently, she was going to have to be engaged in this conversation, whether she wanted to be or not. “Yes, and I also know he’s now clean and sober.” Even though he’d been tempted recently. But there was no way he’d hear that from her.
His father’s eyes narrowed. “He’d have you believe that, wouldn’t he? But did you know he continues smoking marijuana?”
She took a deep breath. No, she hadn’t known that. He’d said he’d gotten high recently, but she didn’t know it was a regular thing for him. Did she approve of it? No. But did it change the way she felt about the man sitting next to her? No. In fact, knowing all the struggles he’d had, if the only vice he had nowadays was pot, she’d consider it good. “Actually, no, I didn’t.” She saw the satisfaction well up in Mr. Schultz’s eyes, but she didn’t intend to let that emotion reside in him. “But you know what? After all Riley’s given up, I’d say pot would be the least of my worries. You are aware, Mr. Schultz, that parts of Colorado have decriminalized marijuana use, even if it’s not for medical purposes, correct?” The man’s eyes narrowed again. Jesus. Now she could understand Riley’s problems with the guy.
She felt Riley’s arm cross her shoulders as he said, “Same with California.”
His father’s mouth started to turn down. Everyone else was silent. He said, “It’s still against federal law, and until that law changes, what he’s doing is illegal.”
Two could play at that game. “I refuse to judge him for that.”
“Fine. I realize it’s fun to play with him right now, Ms. Lancaster. I get the appeal. But what about if your job were in jeopardy?” Erin felt a chill run down her spine, in spite of the warm April sun on her back. “But let’s say you’re even unconcerned about that. What about marriage and children? Would you really want to spend the rest of your life with my son?”
Erin closed her eyes and let the air escape from her lungs. This guy was rough, but now she could understand Riley’s problems with his dad. And there was no way in hell she was going to give him what he wanted. In fact, at this point she didn’t give a shit what happened. She was getting ready to make his father even angrier. She took a deep breath, mentally girding herself.
She stood up. “You know, Mr. Schultz, and I say this with all due respect, I don’t understand what your problem is with Riley. He’s smart and sweet and talented. And he’s made a name for himself in this world. Is he perfect? Of course not. That makes him human, and that’s one of the things I love about your son.” Oh, fuck. She just let the cat out of the bag…in front of God and everybody. She took another breath. She wasn’t going to make a big deal about it. That would just make it worse. Okay…so now he knew. Nothing she could do now. But she took a deep breath so she could finish. “But for the two of you to have an adult relationship, you need to accept him for who he is. His older brother is indeed someone whom you should be proud of.” She looked over at Brian and his family. “But that doesn’t invalidate who Riley is or what he’s done with his life. You might not like his chosen profession, but I can tell you he’s well-respected in the field and at the top of his game. It would be a tragedy…a sin…if he walked away from what he’s good at. It would do the world a disservice.”
Riley’s father snorted. “A disservice, Ms. Lancaster? Now you’re exaggerating.”
“No, I’m not. You don’t understand and might never understand, but people who are fans of metal music are not just people who like to listen to a tune. Typically, the music is their entire world. It’s not just a bunch of songs; it’s a lifestyle. The music is part of who they are. So when they identify with an artist’s music or words, that artist becomes important to the listener.”
He still wasn’t convinced; she could tell that much from the look on his face. She was going to say one last thing and then she was going to be done. And she didn’t dare look at Riley until she was finished. “Spawn was one of my favorite bands in college. I’d play one of their CDs when I was lying on my bed reading homework, or I’d listen to them on my iPod when I was in the gym working out. At parties, they were my number one request. Why? Part of it was the music. The melodic guitar riffs, the demanding drum beats, the growl and scream of the vocals. But part of it was also the words. They spoke to me. They were p
oetry. ‘When no one understands you, I will. / When no one loves you, I will. / When your friends abandon you, / When your lovers desert you, / When your family despises you, / I will always be there’.”
She took a deep breath. Jesus. She realized she’d probably lost the argument, especially with her little fangirl freakout there at the end. “Holy shit,” Riley breathed beside her. “Those are my words.”
She looked over at him and the look in his eyes was dreamy, content, like his family didn’t matter anymore. He almost took her breath away. “Yeah… ‘I Will Never Leave You’.”
He stood beside her. “I know…I wrote it.” She hadn’t expected it, but he took her face in his hands and kissed her. And then she didn’t care about anything else anymore.
Chapter Forty
RILEY DIDN’T KNOW that he’d ever been this happy. He was afraid to even say it. But after kissing Erin in his parents’ backyard, he really didn’t give a shit what they thought anymore. Someone had seen his value and had said things he’d never been able to vocalize.
But he had, apparently, because Erin quoted his own words to use in his defense. That had to be the coolest fucking part of all.
But she wasn’t done. She then commenced to telling everyone at the table that Riley was one of the sweetest, kindest men she’d ever met (there went the bad boy reputation he’d promoted for so long). She told them that her last two boyfriends had been horrible. Her last boyfriend had been mentally and emotionally abusive and the boyfriend before that had been a cheater. Riley showed no signs of being a “creep,” to use her words. He was solid and “damn near perfect.”
So he’d taken her hands in his and said, “Thank you for lunch, mom and dad. Brian, Diane, kids…great to see you.” After taking a deep breath, he said, “I think we’ve worn out our welcome, though.”
He led Erin away, through the gate that led to the front yard. He heard his mother protesting and his father saying, “Oh, just let him go.” That made him all the more determined to leave.
Erin’s hand in his was warm and assuring. And he wondered if she’d really meant all that she’d said. It could have just been a turn of phrase, but he thought he’d caught her say she loved him. Just the idea made his chest swell and he squeezed her hand as they crossed the front lawn to his car.
Erin was quiet. Once they were in his car, he said, “Shit, Erin. You schooled my dad.”
She glanced up from her lap. “I’m sorry. Was I too harsh?”
“No. That was fucking awesome. I know it’s because we’ve got all that history, but I’ve never been able to do that.” He inserted his key into the ignition. “And then using my words too…that was the capper.”
“I meant it.”
Riley cupped her cheek. “All of it?”
She searched his eyes and he saw her pupils dilate a little. What did that mean? But then she leaned forward and said, “Yeah…every word.”
Before he could say anything, he heard a rap on the passenger window behind Erin. The window was already partway down, so he just leaned to the side and Erin turned her head. It was Brian.
“Man, I know you and dad have your differences, but I’m lucky if I get to see you twice a year. Don’t bail, Ry. Annabelle’s already crying that her beloved uncle bailed. Even mom’s close to tears.” Riley clenched his jaw. Yeah, leaving would be a dick move, but he didn’t want any more bullshit. “Gird your loins, man, and come back to the party.”
He looked back to Erin. He’d only go if she was okay with it. She understood his unspoken question and nodded slightly. Riley looked back at Brian. “All right. But you owe me. Big time.”
“Duly noted.”
So they returned to his parents’ backyard. It was stiff at first, but Riley’s father finally clapped him on the back and said, “I’m proud of you, son. I just don’t know how to talk about you to people.”
“Then don’t.”
“But people ask. They want to know how my boys are doing.”
“Then tell them the truth. I’m in a band. Why do you have to tell them anything more than that?”
His father nodded. “I’ll try.”
His mother, though, wasn’t won over, and Riley didn’t care. She’d always been a softer sell, but for some reason, she didn’t like the idea that he and Erin were together. He didn’t care about that either, and it would have bothered him more if he wasn’t going to leave on Monday and his time with Erin would have become a permanent stain on her record. But he’d gathered both from what his parents had said and from what Erin had told him about her meeting with the principal that if the relationship was over by Monday, letting her go would not be an option.
Well, the school wasn’t going to let her go and Riley had agreed to, but he didn’t know that it would be that easy.
So, after they left his parents’ house, they went to Riley’s rented hotel. He was just going to get his stuff and check out, but they decided to spend the night there, away from everyone. And after they made love and Erin had fallen asleep in his arms, he whispered, “I love you too.”
* * *
Erin could feel herself waking up…aroused. She realized she felt Riley’s lips on her shoulder and his warm hand on her belly. Her body was starting to tingle all over. “Mmm…morning,” she said.
His lips moved to her neck, just below her ear, as his hand started moving up toward her breast. “Morning yourself.”
She arched ever so slightly as his hand moved to her breast and his finger starting drawing little swirls on her nipple until it hardened at his touch. She sighed as his lips traced a line down to her other nipple while his hand trailed down lower.
She felt herself grow wet the farther down her body his hand moved. Just the thought of his touch anymore made her breath grow deep and ragged, made her eager and ready. She didn’t know why that was; she only knew he was turning out to be one of the best lovers she’d ever had, and she was going to miss him.
And as his fingers found her throbbing clitoris, she gasped a deep breath of air, realizing that, yes, she did love him. She didn’t want to question how it had happened so quickly and especially when she’d tried to avoid it, but it had. And as she thought about how special he was to her, his lips on her neck, she felt herself getting close to orgasm quickly. He whispered, “You’re an amazing fucking woman, Erin.” He nipped her earlobe and asked, “How’s that feel?”
She answered by collapsing into a mind-shattering orgasm.
* * *
Riley rubbed the towel on his hair. He caught his reflection in the mirror. Jesus Christ. His expression made him look like a newly laid fifteen-year-old. Apropos, since that’s how he felt. Erin had just given him an incredible blowjob in the shower. He was unbelievably happy, and the only thing threatening to wreck his mood was the knowledge in the back of his head that their time together was growing short.
And his ego was soaring after all the nice shit she’d said about him the day before. Part of him wanted to stay up for the next twenty-four hours, alternating between talking, making love, and holding her in his arms. He didn’t know that he could pull all-nighters anymore, though.
He wanted to try to make her as happy as she’d made him. She’d just wrapped her hair in a towel, another one wrapped around her just below her underarms, and she hugged him from behind. She peeked at him in the mirror, her head resting on his right arm. He turned around to hold her and said, “Let’s go eat somewhere. And…”—she raised her eyebrows—“how about you invite this best friend of yours so I can meet her and her husband.”
Her smile was all he needed to see to know he’d made the right move. “I do believe ovulation week is over, so I’ll bet they can make time for us. In fact,” she said, kissing him lightly on the lips, “if she’s pregnant now, I need to start feeding her regularly.”
“Uh…I’m not getting involved in that, but why don’t you go give her a call and see if they’re up for it?”
She squeezed him. “You’re awfully good t
o me.”
He swatted her lightly on the behind as she left the bathroom. “Don’t want you getting used to it.” He winked at her when she stuck out her tongue.
Yeah, it was gonna be hard to go.
Chapter Forty-one
MONDAY MORNING ARRIVED too quickly. Riley got up when Erin did. They made love one last time but both were unusually quiet, knowing their time was up.
Riley was holding her up close to his chest. He could feel her soft breath on his skin and he ached inside. He never wanted to leave.
But pretending it wasn’t going to happen wasn’t going to change the fact that it was going to happen. So he said, “Hey…I know it sucks, but I thought maybe we should talk about the future.”
He could tell she was holding her breath until she said, “What do you mean?”
“Well, I mean…this is it, right? That’s what we decided…so your job is secure. But…I just want to make sure we’ll always be friends. I know that sounds stupid…so…insipid, but I mean it. I don’t want our time together to mean nothing.”
Erin rolled over so she could look him in the eyes. “No, it’s not stupid. I think it’s sweet. And I agree one-hundred percent. What happened over the last week…has been special.” She stroked his cheek. “I never want to forget it. You’ve helped me realize not all guys are poison.”
God, he wanted to be the last guy she’d ever want, but he knew he’d wreck her career if he insisted they be together. And she seemed happy here. What made it worse was the fact that his mother—an influential board member—pretty much ensured Erin’s career could only continue if he wasn’t in the picture.
He kept hoping she’d say something…give him the opportunity to talk himself out of it. But while what she said acknowledged that what they’d had was special, she didn’t indicate that she wanted to continue their relationship.
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