by Trina Solet
"I am censoring myself," Alec told him. He was completely serious.
For some reason Teddy was looking up at Alec impatiently.
"I'm getting to that," Alec told him then he turned into a tour guide again. "This place is called Palmer's Grotto, though it's not technically a grotto. During the colonial days, a crazy guy named Palmer used to have a cabin over there." Alec pointed across the water to the small clearing backed by trees.
Cory looked up the rock face that towered above. Teddy followed his gaze.
"Palmer claimed that this place belonged to him because he saw it in a vision before he ever laid eyes on it. He always had his gun ready and threatened anyone who came here. There's a painting of this place in the Town Hall. It shows Palmer in front of his cabin with a musket in his hands, ready to defend his grotto. My dad painted it," Alec said with a smile.
"Did he paint the mayor's portrait too?" Cory asked.
"No. She wasn't the mayor until after he died."
Teddy now looked up at Alec sadly, and Alec ruffled his hair and gave him a smile.
"Did you ever swim here?" Cory asked.
"Sure, but only when my brother dared me. The cold water and the current don't make for a fun swim. Mostly kids come here just to hang out. You can see some graffiti over there. Sometimes you find empties. The sheriff usually stops by to chase them away." Suddenly Alec leaned in and whispered in Cory's ear, "It's terrible for having sex. This rock is hard as a rock."
Cory felt a tingle run all through him and he glared at Alec. Why the hell was he doing this to him?
"Censoring myself," Alec explained.
Cory decided to ignore him and watch Teddy. He didn't like seeing Teddy standing even two feet away from the edge of the water. He had his arm out ready to catch him. Alec smiled at him for that. Cory shrugged. It was his prerogative as the big brother.
All three of them sat down on the edge of the rock and let their legs dangle over the water. Cory noticed how little Teddy was as he sat between them. He wanted to put his arm around him, but it seemed too soon. For now, he was happy just to be sitting next to him.
As they walked back toward town, Alec said he wanted to get the car and get gas.
"You two walk up Main Street, and I'll pick you up," he told Cory and Teddy. "Don't get lost now."
Teddy looked up at Cory uncertainly, but not like he was worried. As they walked, they passed a small hair salon where they could hear some women laughing. A few, who sat under hair dryers near the window, waved at Teddy. Teddy didn't wave back but Cory did. He wasn't usually so friendly, but he felt like he should be on Teddy's behalf.
Next was a tiny store with snacks near the register. The store sold magazines and newspapers, and a few books. Cory decided to buy a snack for Teddy if he could figure out what he would like. Cory showed different snacks to Teddy. He looked for any sign that would tell him what he liked. His expression changed when he offered him a pack of bubble gum.
"So you're a bubble gum man. I'm a Red Hots man. I like candy that bites back," Cory told him.
Teddy got a funny look on his face hearing that. They spotted Alec's car just then and Cory hurried to pay. As they crossed the street, Cory unconsciously took Teddy's hand. He did it out of instinct, but now he never wanted to let go of that little hand.
Chapter 3
Once they got to the house, Teddy ran straight to the bathroom. Alec went to his room so Cory took the opportunity to wander through the house. There was nothing formal or fussy about the place. Every room was a little messy and disorganized, and that made Cory feel more comfortable about staying there, less like he was intruding. The house was old. Once it had probably been a farmhouse. It must have seen a lot of history, and many lives had been lived in it. The place seemed permanent because of that, like its history had rooted it to the ground.
Some of the furniture reflected its age, but overall the house was furnished carelessly with old, rustic furniture and some newer stuff. The couch and chairs were covered in new, floral fabrics that hurt the eye a little bit. Other than the few new pieces, most of the furniture had obviously seen decades of use. Things had been scratched, broken, repaired and still stood there as proof that not everything is disposable. Cory looked at some of the old pieces more closely, wondering what made them worth fixing and keeping forever. Eventually his wandering through the house took him to the back porch. The sight of it made him smile. That's where Cory's little brother was sitting when he first laid eyes on him. It was strange to think that way about something that happened only earlier that day. It seemed like much longer. This was the most important day of his life, and it wasn't even over yet.
As he stood on the back porch, Cory looked over the drawings of trees Teddy was working on. Then Cory raised his eyes to the view beyond. When he was out here before, he had been so consumed with meeting Teddy that he hadn't noticed much about the land behind the house. From the back porch, Cory could see a field defined by a rough semicircle of trees that thickened into a forest further on. To the east, a hill rose up dark with pine trees that only left the very top bare and rocky.
While he was looking around, Cory didn't notice Alec and Teddy sneaking up on him.
"Aha!" Alec yelled. "Told you he wasn't alert," he said to Teddy.
"You guys got me," Cory said, smiling at Teddy, who looked shy but happy that they surprised him.
Coming to stand next to Cory, Alec stared into the distance. Teddy looked out there too though with a more questioning look, as if he was wondering what was so interesting. Cory loved all the funny expressions on his face, but he still couldn't wait to hear his voice.
Remembering what this place was called, Cory turned to Alec.
"The old man who gave me directions called this place Snowfield," Cory said to him.
"That's because of the flowers. In early spring the field is covered with white flowers that look like snow. That's how this area and the house got that name," Alec told him.
Teddy looked at the field intently. There were different wild flowers out there but not many white ones.
"You guys missed them," Alec told him. "You can see them next year."
Cory thought that was the wrong thing to say since Teddy probably wouldn't be living here then. Alec showed no awareness that he had said anything he shouldn't have. As all three of them took in the view, Cory decided not to worry about that yet. They were here now, Cory and his little brother and an attractive, arrogant guy who had to have a good heart because he opened his home to them. The sight ahead was an expanse of lighter green that darkened under the shade of the trees, which thickened into a forest further on. It must be something to have that outside your back door and to wake up to sights and sounds of nature every morning.
"It must be nice to live here," Cory said.
"It can be. Especially for kids," Alec said. "When we were kids, my brother and I ran wild all over the countryside. I know all the best ambush spots and places to hide, and the best places to break a few bones." Alec pointed at a big tree to the far right. "My brother jumped on me from that tree when we were six and eight years old. I broke my little finger. He broke his big toe. Mom did so much yelling that day. She told the sheriff to arrest us."
Teddy looked a little scared hearing this.
"We didn't get arrested," Alec assured him and touched the top of his head. "That was before Mom was the mayor, or we would have been in big trouble. And Hutchins wasn't the sheriff then. He's too high strung. He would have never survived our childhood. It was Sheriff Miller. He was fat and moved really slow. He only sighed when Mom would demand he put us in handcuffs and throw us in jail."
Teddy still looked worried.
"Oh, we wanted to be put in jail," Alec told him. "We played bank robbers and car thieves all the time. Mom wouldn't buy us Grand Theft Auto. We were dying to be put behind bars, but Miller would never do it."
"So you had fun growing up around here," Cory said.
"Until a certain age."
He looked at Cory significantly. "When I needed a different kind of fun, this place didn't have much to offer."
"He means grown up fun," Cory said to Teddy, who was listening closely but not understanding Alec.
"Want to go for a walk? There's a trail right up to the hill. Or are you too tired?" Alec asked Cory.
Teddy looked eager to go.
"I think we better," Cory said. Even if he didn't want to go, Cory would have said yes just so he wouldn't disappoint Teddy.
*
Alec wished he had thought about how tired Cory must be before he suggested they do more walking. After he made the offer, he saw Cory look at Teddy for the final decision. Those two weren't going to be the kind of brothers he and Ian had been. Alec and his brother had been both teammates and rivals, pushing each other to do crazy things and drive their mother up the wall. The path to the hill was their frequent battleground. The trail curved among trees and shrubs giving them plenty of chances for surprise attacks. Now it was just a place to stroll. The path went right to the bottom of the hill and widened into a sort of rest area with two picnic tables and a garbage bin.
While Teddy's eyes went right to the top of the hill, Cory looked down the narrow dirt road that led there from the other direction.
"It goes into town," Alec told him. He then went up to the sign that said Pine Hill and gave the altitude. He got Teddy's attention then pointed to each letter. Alec had read it to him before. Now Teddy mouthed the words silently then the numbers. Looking up at Alec, he seemed to be asking him if he got it right. Alec read it aloud and left it up to Teddy to decide. Teddy nodded. Cory beamed at him like he had been doing all day. It was as if Cory's whole life had been focused on meeting his little brother. Alec couldn't even imagine what it must be like to find your only family in a little boy.
A reproachful and expectant look from Teddy reminded Alec that he should be playing the tour guide again.
"The town got its name from that." Alec pointed to the top of the pine covered hill. "If you go to the very top, on a clear day, you can see the ocean. Teddy is dying to go up there, but it's a hard climb. My brother and I went up when I was twelve and he was fourteen, I nearly broke my neck. Our father had just died. He promised he would take us up when we were old enough. Climbing to the top is kind of a rite of passage around here."
Alec remembered stubbornly following his brother even though Ian kept telling him to turn back. If they couldn't go with their father, at least they would go together. There was nothing Ian could do to stop him.
Afterward, the two of them tried to sneak back home without letting Mom know where they had been. But seeing the state they were in, she must have known. Their clothes were torn and their fingers were scratched raw from climbing. That was the only time he and his brother did something crazy and Mom didn't yell at them. She just said, "Go get cleaned up." And that was it. They kept waiting, but she didn't scold them like they thought she would. Alec suspected that she understood why they had to do it. Their father's death had been so recent. She must have been in so much pain, but she hardly ever let them see it. She was all bluster and noise with a big heart underneath. That's why, as soon as she laid eyes on Teddy, she decided not to let him be taken away.
"Someone will come for him," she said.
Alec didn't believe it then, but here he was – a quiet, serious big brother for Teddy, and a temptation for Alec.
Alec led the way back home. They circled the house and approached it from the other side. As Cory looked over the fence into the vegetable garden, Alec opened the gate so Teddy could look too. It was in a sorry state, but the tomatoes and green beans thrived anyway. The zucchini were the real problem. They just wouldn't die. Alec didn't hate them as much as he did when he was a kid, but he wasn't a fan either.
"Who takes care of it?" Cory asked.
"Does it look like anyone takes care of it?" Alec said. "My policy on the garden is if it doesn't bother me, I won't bother it. It does fine with minimal interference. My mom isn't much of a cook anyway."
"You mentioned that," Cory said with a wry look.
"I have to," Alec said, ready to justify himself. "I don't want the power to go to her head. My dad would pick the vegetables, and she would look at them like they would bite her. 'What am I supposed to do with these?' The only thing she knew how to handle were the tomatoes. She made enough pasta sauce to last us months. We always have a ton of it in the freezer. My dad would use the other vegetables and make a huge pot of soup. I do the same thing sometimes."
Cory crouched down for a better look. He even pulled some weeds while he was down there.
"If you know what to do with them, they're all yours. Other than the soup, all I know how to do is throw them in a salad or in a blender. Teddy needs the nutrition." Alec looked down just in time to see Teddy grimacing. He had already learned that nutrition was a dirty word.
"Does that mean you want me to cook?" Cory asked like he wanted to know what his duties were around the house.
"If you know how, go for it," Alec told him. He had a feeling that Cory was the kind of guy who liked to make himself useful. "We're a soup and sandwich kind of family. Anything you can add to the menu would be welcome."
"I'll see what I can do," Cory said and looked at Teddy. From that, Alec could guess that he would be cooking with Teddy in mind.
Chapter 4
When they went back into the house, Teddy ran to the back porch and sat down at his table like there was something he urgently had to draw. Cory resisted the urge to go and look over his shoulder. That would probably unnerve the little guy. Though he wanted to spend every second with Teddy, Cory knew he shouldn't smother him, especially since he hadn't even told him who he was.
As Teddy was busy drawing, Cory went and found Alec in the kitchen and took the opportunity to ask him some things. First he pushed down the overwhelming, heart-pounding desire to jump him. Cory hoped he would get used to Alec soon and stop salivating every time he saw him.
"I wanted to ask, who gave Teddy that name?" Cory said. He already thought of him as Teddy. He had to remind himself that that wasn't his name, and that one day, hopefully soon, he would tell them his real name.
"I did," Alec said with a smile. "First I asked Mom how it was done. She said, 'How does anyone come up with a name for a child? When you were born, I just looked at you, and a voice in my heart told me your name was Alec.' So I followed her advice. When I looked at your little brother, the name Teddy popped into my head. I told Teddy it was just temporary in case he didn't like it." Alec frowned. "In those first days, I couldn't tell how he felt about things. He wasn't very expressive."
"Did he cry much?" Cory asked.
"Not at all. I told him it was OK to, but he never did. Not even at the hospital when they took his blood, and he got shots. He flinched, squeezed his eyes shut, but he didn't cry."
Cory bit his lip worriedly. He hated to think of all the sadness trapped inside such a little kid.
"He's a tough little guy," Alec said, seeing the concern it caused him. "He has shown plenty of emotions since then."
Cory had seen that for himself, but he wanted Teddy to feel comfortable showing every emotion, and eventually speaking. There was so much Cory didn't know. It worried him. He didn't want to make any mistakes where Teddy was concerned. Most of all, he was afraid that something might separate him from the little brother he only just met.
"Do you think I could ask the sheriff about the investigation?" Cory asked. He already knew some of it, but he wanted to know more. Not sure about how things worked in Seaview Pines, he didn't want to step on any toes, especially the sheriff's.
"I can tell you about it too," Alec offered. "Mom told me everything the sheriff and the state police found out."
The two of them sat down at the kitchen table, and Alec talked.
"No one reported seeing Teddy until Bonnie Carlton spotted him by the side of Bailers Road. No one saw him in any car that stopped anywhere within miles o
f here. The sheriff got the description of every car and every person that was seen anywhere in the area. Only one thing stands out. At a gas station by the off ramp from the interstate, someone remembered seeing a woman with a rose tattoo on her wrist. That only seemed significant once they connected Teddy and you."
"You know about that," Cory said, surprised.
"Only that a woman with a rose tattoo was suspected of abandoning you sixteen years ago. Teddy wasn't seen with her though. And otherwise, her description is very sketchy. A skinny woman, maybe in her forties with curly, blond hair. No one remembered her face or which car she got into."
Cory was thoughtful for a while.
"I was three when I was abandoned. I kind of remember that tattoo but not much else," he said after his long silence. "I found out some things once I turned eighteen, but it wasn't much. The apartment where I was found was rented to some guy who was using a fake name. He couldn't be traced. A bunch of different people crashed there, always coming and going. The neighbors said it was always noisy then it got quiet. After a while, a neighbor heard me crying and crying. They called social services. The neighbors said that I was seen with a woman who called herself Charlene and had a rose tattoo on her wrist. Their best guess was that she might be my mother."
Alec took a deep breath though Cory was the one who felt spent after telling him the few, painful things that he knew.
"Sure makes me appreciate that loud-mouthed politician I have to put up with," Alec said with a grin.
"Your mom is great," Cory said. "I'm glad she took such an interest in Teddy. And that you did too." He was so grateful to them for giving Teddy a home, even if it was a temporary one.
"Mom likes to stick her nose in. She didn't want Teddy shuffled back and forth. Mom was hoping a relative would turn up to claim Teddy. I was skeptical, but here you are," Alec said. He then turned more serious. "I just wish I had more answers for you. Once Teddy starts talking, we'll know more."
