by Amy Miles
His hands slid down to my hips and he pushed me away—leaving me out of breath and more than a little startled. As quickly as I’d began it, he’d ended it.
My lips were still warm and moist from being against his as I watched Trip back away from me. My chest went hollow and my insides sank further and further with every inch he put between us. “What happened?” I said.
I meant why did he stop, but it came out more as if I was surprised by what we’d just done—which conveniently applied too.
He didn’t answer, but his face contorted and he ran both hands through his tousled hair. Emotions ran wild in his eyes and I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. One thing for sure was that I’d never seen him so flustered, so not sure of what to say. Because of our kiss?
With each second of silence that passed, a wall of tension mounted. Not two minutes ago we’d been closer than I could’ve ever imagined. It hadn’t been some blurry vision in my head either. It had been real. Now I racked my brain to figure out what had changed and how to change it back. He’d seemed way into me. . . . so, why would he push me away?
Trip kicked the rear tire of his truck. He pulled his keys from his pocket and pressed a button that unlocked both our doors. “Come on. Let’s go.”
What the . . . ? I stepped toward him. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No.” He didn’t sound very convincing. He backed further away from me, waited a moment and then gestured impatiently. “We just need to get to Lynn’s as soon as possible. Remember?”
Yeah, barely though. I fingered my mouth and then reached for him. “Just tell me why you’re upset so I can fix it.”
He retreated toward the driver’s side door and pulled it open. “We can’t waste time with this. It’s late enough as it is.”
Our first kiss had been a waste of time? Apparently I’d misread the handholding, his touching my birthmark and the sexy lip action from two minutes ago. My heart sank. “How can you be so cold?”
He turned away from me, got into his car and gripped the steering wheel with both hands.
Stunned, I came around the passenger side, slid in, and slammed the door.
His hands were still on the wheel, clutching tightly, but he didn’t start the car.
Fury ran through me. I’d opened myself up to him and he seemed to respond, but now he was rejecting me? Forget him then. “Start the car. It’s getting late, isn’t it? Aren’t we in a hurry?”
He stared at the wheel, not once glancing over at me. “That was my fault. It shouldn’t have happened.”
“Don’t give yourself so much credit.” I turned to face him but he didn’t look up. “I’m the one who kissed you. Remember?”
The look on his face said, yes, he remembered.
He’d felt it too. I could see that. So, what was the problem?
He ran a hand over his face. “Sam’s going to kill me.”
“You’re worried about what Sam will think? It’s not like we’re going to tell him.” How could he be thinking of Sam after what had just happened between us? Didn’t the guy have feelings about anything besides work? “You know what? Just drive.”
A girl has her pride, after all.
“Fine.” He started the car, threw the gear in reverse and backed out of the parking space where we’d been kissing mere minutes ago. Why couldn’t I have a power that rewound time? That would’ve been especially useful right about now.
Trip pulled out onto the street before he spoke again. “When my mom was killed by that driver texting on his cell phone when he should’ve been concentrating on his driving,” he talked slowly, his voice low and each word filled with emotion, “I made a promise to myself that I’d help other victims. Do for them what I couldn’t do for her. When I broke into Sam’s computer notes, I did it because I wanted to find Amanda’s kidnapper and put him behind bars so he couldn’t hurt anyone else. That is something that I will do. No matter what it takes.”
My eyes burned and a lump formed in my throat as he drove through a yellow light and then made a hard right turn.
“When that guy had you by your throat last night,” his voice was steel now, “I swore I would give up anything if you could live.”
My chest tightened as each of his words rang in my ears.
He drew in an audible breath. “I may not be a cop yet, but I am an officer of the law in my heart and in my soul. That means doing what I can to catch the bad guys. Doing what I can to protect you.”
He glanced over at me with a frown that made my heart crack. The irony was like a sword through my chest. Trip was freaking heroic and that’s why he was dumping me—for my own good. So not fair.
My brows came together. “You’re telling me that you followed me to the cemetery tonight for the benefit of the case? That’s your story?”
His eyes remained firmly on the road. “I was only concerned about your safety. Yes.”
The words stung, but I refused to believe he meant them. He was trying to do the right thing. The jerk.
But he’d said “only.” A terrible thought crept in. Was it possible he was telling the truth? I swallowed the lump in my throat. “But, you do like me. You wouldn’t have kissed me like that otherwise.”
His gaze flickered. “Let’s just forget about it.”
The lump was a boulder now, but there was no way I’d let him see me cry. No way I’d let him know he’d just smashed my heart to oblivion.
He entered the onramp of highway 50. “We need to concentrate on solving the case and getting the criminals behind bars.”
“Whatever you say.” I brought my thumb to my mouth and nibbled my nail. It didn’t comfort me in the slightest. I still wanted to fall apart. The case. Concentrate on the case. “What exactly are you hoping to find at Lynn’s?”
“Answers. After what you told me earlier tonight, there’s no doubt she knows more than she’s let on.” He paused a moment, read the address in the notebook again and then took the first exit outside of the city. “We need to find out which girl these guys are after so we can stay one step ahead and catch them. We have Miller behind bars, but Bishop—and God knows who else—is still out there. They took Amanda but for some reason decided they didn’t want her. They left her for dead, but didn’t kill her. Why?”
It scared me how quickly he could switch back to business. Just forget what we’d shared. Julie was right. I didn’t have what it takes to snag a guy. No matter how much attitude I’d just given, it didn’t change how much I hurt inside.
I bit my lip, deciding I couldn’t give up so easily. “Don’t you have any feelings for me?”
His jaw twitched and I swear his eyes clouded as he turned left into a secluded neighborhood outside the city limits. “We’ve already talked about this.”
I turned in my seat. “Right. You promised you’d keep me safe. Well, hello?” I waved a hand in the air. “You’re doing a great job. I’m right here, perfectly safe and healthy.”
“Kylie—”
I wanted to look away but forced myself to watch him.
His face remained blank as he pulled alongside a curb and put the truck into park. For the first time, he turned in his seat and looked at me. “I’m sorry. I don’t feel anything beyond concern for a person I’m supposed to be helping.”
My heart pounded in my chest. I fought so hard to keep my face blank too but it wasn’t working. My lip trembled. “Liar.”
“I’m not lying,” he said, and looked at me seriously. His gorgeous green eyes were cold. “We need to move on from this, go in, get answers, and put an end to this case. What can I do to convince you this is a professional relationship and nothing more?”
Not kiss me for one thing. Not listen to my mind reading problems and look so concerned. Not run your finger over my birthmark in a way that sends chills through me and makes your face flush. Not look at me in ways that say you’re feeling all the things I am.
But, he wasn’t looking at me like that right now. Maybe I had been deluding mys
elf. I mean, no matter what your instincts tell you, how well did you really know another person?
If he wanted to play this game, there was only one way to find out for sure what he was thinking. “Let me read you.”
He didn’t hesitate. “Fine.”
My mouth dropped open. “What did you say?”
“I said okay.” He looked at me in a way that was different than he ever had. Like he pitied me. If he was trying to push me away, it was working. “If that’s the only way to get you to move on from this and help me solve this case, go ahead. Read me.”
I stared down at his right hand. It rested on his thigh in such a casual manner. He didn’t sound like he was lying. He didn’t seem like he was hiding anything. Did I really want to know?
Wait a minute. He’d bluffed me before—Scout’s honor. He could easily be bluffing now. “Okay, I’ll read you. Give me your hand.”
His eyes didn’t flinch or waver as he held his right hand out to me.
My chest thundered. If I was kidding myself, I didn’t really want the truth. Was it too late to say I changed my mind? I took a deep breath, knowing I couldn’t back down. My hand shook as I reached out to hold his hand, but he pulled back.
“On one condition,” he said.
Geez. Had I ever felt this nervous in my life? “What is it?”
“That when you see for yourself it’s merely professional between us, you don’t bring this up again. Deal?”
I raised my chin a notch. “Deal.”
And then he slipped his hand into mine.
Buzzing wandered up my arm, zipped up my neck, and images flashed in my head. I closed my eyes ready to see how Trip really felt about me as the first shot appeared. An 8x10 photo of Amanda. Notes about the case on a computer screen. Me in the quad as I answered Trip’s questions about shaking hands with Bishop. I saw myself say, “I didn’t actually see him drop her in the woods. It’s like all the images are coming from what he saw or something.”
Blackness filled my head. I opened my eyes and frowned. Our hands were still connected. Why had the images disappeared?
Then, before I knew it something zapped up my arm, neck, into my head. New photos appeared. Chiseled face and long hair. Miller.
“It will go a lot easier on you if you just tell us who you’re working for,” a female voice said. Then a woman appeared, her blonde hair pulled back tightly into a bun. She walked around to the other side of Miller. Collins.
“We could convince the D.A. to go easy on you.” Sam circled around him with both hands neatly folded behind his back. “Maybe even get him to reduce the charges from attempted murder to battery. Wouldn’t you prefer probation instead of eight to ten in State Prison?”
I couldn’t believe it. These were no longer just images. More like scenes from a movie. I could hear everything, see everything as if I’d actually been there. Like I’d witnessed it when, really, Trip had. But the sounds and images were so clear. Then, Miller looked up and stared right through me. Or through Trip rather.
The scene faded and everything went black.
Where’d he go? My eyes bulged but I squeezed and confirmed I still had a hold of Trip’s right hand. So, why’d the scene stop? I know I was supposed to be searching for how Trip felt about me, but I really wanted to finish the interaction with Miller. Why’d the reel go away?
Trip gently pulled his hand away then. “Are you convinced now? I know you aren’t supposed to be on this case, but I need your help getting info from Lynn. We can’t play any more games, Kylie. People’s lives are on the line. Yours included.”
“I know,” I said, quietly. He wasn’t bluffing. There hadn’t been a hint of romance in Trip’s head. His mind was totally on his work. “And to answer your question. . . yes, I’m satisfied.”
His face relaxed. “Good. Then let’s go and see what we can find out from Lynn.”
“All right.” I pulled the handle, pushed open the car door, and stepped onto the curb somewhat bewildered. Something didn’t feel right. Sure, it was weird that I’d seen his thoughts as fluid scenes and not snapshot images like I used to. Maybe my power was developing. Who knew? Not like I had a mind reading manual.
But the images definitely weren’t fuzzy. He wasn’t making up what he was thinking.
Wait a minute. What he was thinking. That’s it. Of course. Trip knew I was going to read him. He knew I’d be able to see what he was thinking. My eyes narrowed. He’d played me. He’d controlled his thoughts. How was I supposed to know what he really felt unless I took him by surprise?
He came around the front of the truck and stood beside me on the sidewalk. “Ready?”
I stared him in the eye. “Oh, yes. I’m ready. The question is are you?”
He looked at me quizzically. “I’m not sure I follow—”
“Like you said. Enough of these games.” I grabbed his right hand in mine. At the same time I put my left arm around his waist and pressed myself against him.
Liquid heat drove up my right arm, dripped into my head, and let loose a flood of blurry scenes. Trip’s arms wrapping around me right there on the sidewalk, his mouth devouring mine. His hands sliding up the back of my shirt, kneading into me as I pressed myself further against him.
I squeezed my eyes shut and concentrated harder, searching for something more. Something before our kiss, so I’d know I hadn’t imagined everything the entire time.
Then, in a flash, we were at the dark cemetery on the bench. The scene was crystal clear as Trip ran his thumb over my infinity mark and I could feel the warmth spread throughout his body then center in a part where . . . holy cow!
I knew he’d been feeling it too.
Then the scene on the bench turned fuzzy and Trip’s hands traveled up my sides and down over my belly, exploring every inch of exposed skin until he finally pulled me down against him. Amazingly, I could actually feel the tingles of his skin on mine and I was afraid I might pass out in front of Lynn’s house from the enormity of the zings shooting through my body.
In one hazy flash, Trip rolled me over onto the cold, damp grass where his mouth found mine, his hands exploring the back of my jeans—soaked butt be damned!—then pulled me tighter against him before his hands traveled up into my hair, wrapping on either side of my face as he held me still against his mouth and tasted his fill.
Trip jerked his hand away and everything went black.
My legs totally gave out then and Trip caught me as I grabbed onto his shoulder to keep from falling flat on the pavement. Amazing that something mental could cause such a physical reaction. But, there you have it. I was literally putty in his hands.
I studied his gorgeous eyes, which were a stormy color green right now. I wanted to say something semi-intelligent but coherent words escaped me so I breathed, “Wow.”
He kept his arm around my waist, holding me up. With the smoldering way he looked at me, I didn’t know if he wanted to hit me for tricking him or make all of his thoughts a reality right there on the walkway. I voted for the latter, but my ego wouldn’t let me attempt it. Rejected once, sucks. Rejected twice in the same night? Pathetic.
I steadied my legs, pushed myself away from him, and wiped my sweaty palms against the sides of my jeans. “Thought so.”
His mouth set and his jaw pulsed. “You had no right—”
“I had your permission, Boy Scout.” If he expected me to feel guilty he could dream on. Especially after what he’d just put me through, lying to me about how he really felt. “You’re the one who had no right controlling what I could read and what I couldn’t. I knew there was a reason the scenes kept fading out into new ones without me willing it.”
He didn’t admit anything when he took a step toward me. “No matter what you think you just saw when you violated my privacy like that—”
“Think I saw?” I snorted. “Your thoughts were so far from business, I should have you arrested.”
I turned away from him and strode up to the porch, waving my hand o
ver my shoulder to blow him off. “You don’t need to spend any more time convincing me,” I said, promptly ringing the doorbell even though it was probably close to midnight. “I get it. For whatever reason, you’re using this lame have-to-protect me crap to keep from admitting how you really feel about me.”
“It’s not crap.” He stepped toward me in a threatening manner that was way more heated than I’d ever seen Trip. “Do you think it was safe for us to hook up in a parking lot when someone just tried to kill you?”
He had a small point. “Well, not especially, but we could make a normal date or something—”
“There is nothing normal about what’s happening here.” He was yelling now. I didn’t even know he knew how to yell. “No matter what we may or may not be feeling, the number one priority is safety and I can’t protect you when you’re distracting me like you did in the parking lot and like you just did back there.”
Another minor point, but no way was he turning this around. “It’s not my fault you lied and made me test you. We could’ve gone to your place or something.”
Oh my gosh! Did I really just suggest that?
Trip took a deep breath and looked like he was trying to calm down. Good thing too. I liked the calm Trip much better. “You’re not getting it. There is no we. There is only the case. I’m sworn to protect you and I can’t—”
“Forget it!” I turned away from him and rang the doorbell three more times in a row. Obsessive? Maybe. But, props to anyone who takes rejection well and the doorbell was the only thing I had to take it out on. “I don’t need to hear your list of reasons not to date me. I’m not some desperate girl who needs to convince a guy to be with her. I have plenty of guys who are interested in me. Like Joel for example.”
