Once Upon A [Fallen] Time

by Samreen Ahsan

“You are creating false hopes just on the basis of the flowers in her hair,” I argued. Didn’t he know we didn’t even deserve to lead an ordinary life? So ordinary that a man can drench in rain, soak in the warmth of the sun, walking on green grass or as ordinary as seeing his face in a looking glass.

  “Last night was the first night ever in my life when I didn’t see her in my dreams,” he admitted quietly. “You know why?” He had all my attention. “Because she’s here. No more haunting in dreams.”

  I felt my pulse dropping at his words. His observation wasn’t wrong. I had stopped seeing that dream since I had first met her in the mirror. But for the past two nights, I had encountered nightmares. How come my father didn’t see any bad dreams?

  “A dream is just a dream. Don’t rely on senseless visions,” I commented to cover up my confusion. “You’re just obsessed with the poem.”

  “What else does that mean, Edward?” He looked at me with pain in his eyes. “Haakon once gave the prediction that a woman would come in this castle and bring colours.” I sucked in my breath. The bloody old man and his predictions! The hall started to close in on me. Did he think she was here for his redemption? My head was suddenly spinning. “And I know she is able to see herself in the mirror, isn’t she?” I closed my eyes. I wanted to run away from his questions. How could I keep her away from his obsession?

  First, I was trying to protect her from the beast inside me, and now I had to keep her away from his power. I had known my father since my birth. He was not in love with her. He wanted to claim her body—but not in a way he had done with other women in the past. He wanted to earn her pleasure as well. He wanted her approval before making a move. He wanted to fulfil his desires by admiring and worshipping her and not giving her pain.

  Shit! Why hadn’t I realized it earlier? Why hadn’t I thought before I had greedily pulled her into my world?

  “I asked you, Edward! What did you see in the mirror?” King Stefan said, pulling me back into his world.

  “You know the answer,” I replied, looking him straight in the eye.

  “Good,” he took a sip of tea. “Give her a few more days, and then we will take her to the library to show her the spring for testing.”

  My heart stopped beating. “Testing what?”

  “To see what that water can do to her,” he smiled devilishly.

  “And what if she dies?”

  He shrugged.

  Goddammit! He would kill her?

  He had just confessed he desired her and wanted to gain some years to live, and here he was planning to throw her in the water to test.

  “I know she won’t die. Trust my instincts.” He continued eating his breakfast, as he added more cheese and bread to his plate.

  “How can you be so sure?”

  “Because I’m certain that none of the curses will affect her.” A devilish grin was plastered on his face. “Owning a woman that wouldn’t die due to our curse—isn’t it gratifying, Edward?” I released my breath I had been holding for too long. My heart was stuck in my throat. I didn’t know what the bastard had planned for her. He was damn sure she was the one—as certain as I was. I would have to talk to Haakon to feed something in Stefan’s mind in order to keep her safe. This was heading in the wrong direction. But if I kept pushing her away from me, how could I make her trust me?

  After today’s incident, she’d rather trust King Stefan than me, simply because he was being a gentleman to her. A good woman never goes after riches—she falls for the man who is kind to her. And in my case, King Stefan played the role of that kind man.

  I could see my recent nightmare coming to life.

  I pushed my chair with the back of my knees and stood up. “I will see you at dinner.” Without saying another word to him, I walked out of the dining hall, towards the stable. I knew it was against protocol to leave the table before the king, but to hell with the manners. I couldn’t sit in front of him and feed his pathetic obsession. I wanted to run for a while, wanted to breathe. Everything around me was suffocating. The leeches, spiders, and snakes had come out of my dream—strangling me, choking me, sucking my blood from the very core.

  “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,

  while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”

  ― Lao Tzu

  CHAPTER 15

  MYRA

  JUNE 13th 1415

  Arsehole!

  I hate him.

  I hate him

  I hate him.

  I thought admitting it three times would curb my anger, but damn it! He had made me beyond furious. I hated myself that I had surrendered to him one more time. I had been so desperate to lose my virginity… to Prince Arse of Stubbornness. What he had done to me in the dressing room; he hadn’t kissed me. He had fuckin’ humiliated me.

  I looked around the room to find a dagger or a sword to torture him, but there was nothing here. I went into the dressing room and looked in the drawers. I knew he was attracted to me; his body had desired me for so many years, but this stonehearted man had just pushed me to the edge. His heart was not accepting the fact that he could be loved—even if he was cursed. I had come here for him—left my world just to be with him, and what was he doing to me? Perhaps he enjoyed pulling me close to him to see how far I could go—only to then push me away. Perhaps that gave him an adrenaline rush.

  I recalled the story of the Beauty and the Beast in my mind. Belle still loved the beast despite all his flaws, but then the beast also changed himself for her. He became gentler with her, but my beast was just a rude self-centered bastard. This is your life, Myra. Not a fairytale.

  I looked at myself in the mirror one more time. Last night, I had thought we’d made progress—thought I’d at least be a friend of his after the conversation we had under the starry sky, but he had been a totally different man when he’d woken up this morning. What could have happened overnight? Had the demons from his nightmare haunted him? Had he seen the same dream he used to see before I had come into his life? I felt like shaking him and ask him why he continued to hurt me? Why did it make him happy to hurt my feelings? Why couldn’t he see my love for him?

  I had always thought men in this time treated women as ladies—with respect. I had been so so so wrong. They were perverted, sick-minded, and barbaric. There was no such thing as courtly love. Rubbish! Now I understood why no woman had ever survived in this castle. It was these sick men that killed the woman’s heart and tortured the soul. I had thought Edward was different, but the way he had kissed me—it hadn’t been a kiss out of love. It had been a glimpse of torture to show me what he had been warning me about. Should I blame him for it? He had confessed that the beast had been fed by King Stefan all these years. And if a woman would try to come close to him—to show him love—the beast would kill her. He wasn’t lying. The way he had grabbed me and dug his fingers into my back, I had felt like he’d break my ribcage. But when I’d tried to reciprocate his action, he had pulled back instantly. He was a bloody coward—who’d never show his love.

  Did he fear losing me, or was he afraid I might have the power to torture him the same way he could? Why did my touch snap him so much? Why did he not let me touch him at all? I knew he didn’t allow others to touch him because his paedophile teacher had molested him for years—but he had always fantasized to feel my touch. Now when I was in his life, why was he restraining himself?

  Breathe, Myra! Breathe!

  Me being nice to King Stefan made him jealous. That was one weapon I could use anytime to take my revenge, but what I didn’t understand was the king’s generosity. Edward had told me the king had asked him to keep an eye on me, but if I couldn’t do anything to end his curse, would he still be kind to me or punish me? Would Edward save me if King Stefan tried to hurt me? After today’s events, I highly doubted he was my knight in shining armour after all. Perhaps, that’s how he was. The true him was the man who had left me on the stretch rack in the tower. The true him was the man who had drawn
blood from my lips, rather than kissing me softly. He didn’t deserve my forgiveness. When he had brought me back from the tower with the apologetic concern on his face, I had thought he’d care for me. But the way he had humiliated me in the dressing room and then in front of King Stefan… it was beyond belief.

  A pagan? Ha!

  He couldn’t come up with something better? He completely sucked at making up stories. But how could I teach him? He was an honest human being. He didn’t know how to pretend happiness or fake a smile. He didn’t know how to lie when Stefan tried to manipulate him. He had to be a bit shrewd and a liar in order to survive. If he were in the twenty-first century, I’d have made him binge watch some crazy British dramas, where people lie, plan behind the scene, and attack a person with words. Truth had already taken his twin sister’s life and the only happiness he had: Emma.

  I had to find a way to bring Emma into this castle. Teaching children was a good excuse to invite Emma back to the castle, but if she didn’t show up today with her aunt, how could I ask King Stefan to bring all the children to the castle? He’d certainly wonder why I’d want to bring Emma only. He’d consider me as Edward’s ally then. I had to come up with a plan before making a move, and I knew I was alone in this battle. Edward would never stand with me to fight, because he had no strength to face the child.

  I walked up to the window and watched the morning sky outside. It was so quiet and tranquil—a perfect spot for reading.

  Reading!

  That reminded me of the library in this castle. How could I enter? I couldn’t ask Edward for it because the only way to enter the underground library was through King Stefan’s chamber and I couldn’t even ask King Stefan about the library because he had not mentioned any library to me yet.

  But you can ask for the books. After all, he asked you to ask him for anything your heart desires.

  I smiled mischievously.

  I was hoping King Stefan would give me a tour of the castle, but I also knew Edward would never approve of it. I could have visited the library last night, but Prince Arse of Stubbornness had come at the wrong time and taken me out of Stefan’s grip. I didn’t know if I should thank him or stay angry with him. He had come to save me from King Stefan, because he knew how much I hated King Stefan touching me but, I also knew that the king would never lay his hands on me without Edward’s permission. No matter how merciless he was, these kings still had rules they had to abide by. They were not allowed to torture each other’s captives.

  An hour had almost passed, and it was almost time for me to go down and meet the children. I wondered how many children would show up. Would they show up out of fear or would the parents genuinely want their children to learn? I hoped to kill the fear among the children. Just like what King Stefan had said: we want children to blossom their minds.

  I was also hungry. I would have eaten at the table had it not been for King Stefan scrutinizing me with his lecherous gaze.

  The door suddenly opened, grabbing my attention. I craned my neck to the left side to see Edward standing at the door, holding a glass of milk and something wrapped in brown cloth.

  He shut the door and walked towards the window, ignoring his beastly reflection in the mirror. He placed the milk and the cloth on the sideboard next to the bed. Without asking, he took my hand and pushed me to sit down on the bed. My body reacted to his command, and I hated myself for obeying him this way. It was as if my body was accustomed to working with his desires.

  He picked up the glass of milk and handed it to me. “Drink.”

  I looked at him, befuddled. What was he trying to do? Was it his way of apologizing or showing his care, or was he trying to prove who had the power?

  I didn’t take the glass from him. Instead, I kept staring at him.

  “Do not make me repeat,” he ordered.

  I took a deep breath to calm down my anger, because enraging him when I was also furious wouldn’t help. God knew what collateral damage we’d do together.

  I took the glass from him without arguing and sipped. The milk was clearly not pasteurized, and I doubted that it was even cow’s milk.

  “I don’t like it.” I grimaced in disgust. It was goat’s milk, I guessed.

  He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. Was he trying to calm himself too?

  “I didn’t ask if you liked it or not—you have to drink it.” He was trained to issue orders all the time. It was in his nature, and the Hue men never heard no for an answer. He picked up the brown cloth and unwrapped it. “It might taste better with this.” It was the same bread I had gotten from the village yesterday. Had he gone to the same baker to ask him for the bread or had he sent someone to fetch it for me? But there were so many bakers in the village. How would his servant know from which one to get?

  I couldn’t help but smile at the way he had found a way to improve things between us. Since he was Prince Arse of Stubbornness, I knew he’d never apologize to me for his animalistic behaviour, but this was his way to show me he still cared.

  I couldn’t help but ask. “Did you go to the village to get the bread?”

  He averted his gaze, looked towards the window, and raked his hands through his hair.

  “There is a word called sorry. You could have also said that,” I said, chewing the delicious bread.

  He shot me a hostile glance. “Do you always have to make things difficult for me?”

  “What did I do now?” I asked, my mouth still full of bread.

  “Just finish your food,” he ordered again.

  “Can’t we just be normal, Edward?”

  “Normal? What is normal between us? Can you forget what happened?”

  “If you stop being so rude then I’d forgive you,” I barked.

  “Forgive me? When did I ask for an apology?”

  “Oh my God. Prince Arse of Stubbornness cannot even say sorry.” Oops! I hadn’t meant to say my nickname for him.

  “What? What did you just say?” Anger welled up in his eyes.

  I took another sip of milk to avoid his question. The large glass was hiding my face and also the laughter that was sneaking its way out of my mouth. I knew if I laughed at his annoyance right now, he’d kill me. So I kept drinking milk, without taking the glass off my mouth. It was still disgusting. But I needed the time to conceal and control my laughter. For some reason, he decided not to press me for an answer straight away. Instead, he waited patiently while I was taking my time finishing the foul milk, hoping he’d just forget what I had just called the future king of England. I would probably make history with this name… King Edward Hue of England, previously entitled as the Prince Arse of Stubbornness.

  Wow!

  As soon as I’d finished the milk, he snatched the glass from me and placed it on the sideboard with a loud thud.

  “What did you just say?” he asked again, his voice dripping with annoyance.

  Just thinking about his new title led to an eruption of laughter inside me. I couldn’t control myself and burst into laughter.

  His nostrils inflated in anger, which made me laugh even more. I must say I was thoroughly enjoying him pissed off like that.

  “Dammit, you woman!” He snatched the cloth from my lap and pushed me against the feathered mattress. He didn’t give me any time to even grasp the situation before he pinned me against the sheets.

  His heavy body crashed on me, his lips on mine. He devoured me like he had been hungry for such a long time, waiting only for me to sate his appetite. I lost track of time. I lost the sense of my existence as he claimed me with domination. He carried authority and pride like one would wear a garment—reeking of power and regality.

  He caged me in his world with just a fervent kiss—wreaking havoc on my emotions. I was no longer angry with him. I no longer carried any grudge, no longer desired to take revenge, and no longer felt humiliated. All I wanted was to lose myself in the pool of insanity he was drowning me in. The way his emotions spilled from his mouth was enough to s
how how much he needed me in his life. I was his only hope he could hold on to. Unlike our first kiss, which had been out of anger, this one held the passion of the entire universe. His kiss begged me to stay with him—never to leave him, no matter how many hardships we’d face.

  My body was physically aching with his weight on me, but I enjoyed the flavour he was offering me. I had never felt so filled, so completed in my life. This was his way of showing me that I only belonged to him—and no one else. No one could ever come close to me and no one could ever claim me. His hands still pinned mine as his lips drew silhouette from my lips to my jaw and to my neck. I hummed with pleasure as he kissed the most sensitive spot under my ear.

  This was a man who had never touched a woman in his life and waited for the one who had haunted his dreams forever—and he could give so much love like I had never imagined. I felt hunted, claimed… yet completed and fulfilled. This wasn’t a kiss from a beast, but a kiss from a man to whom I was his world. The kiss didn’t have humiliation but the power to cross all the oceans of love. He kept kissing me in mad desperation—a primal force that he had no choice but to obey.

  A bell rang outside the room. No! Someone had arrived. The servants usually rang the bell if they wanted the attention of royalties to give a message.

  Edward pulled himself off me instantly. I caught my breath as he lifted his weight off me but still pinned my wrists. He didn’t respond to the bell. He just kept looking at my face, drinking me in with his stare. I could see both hunger and pain in his eyes. He wanted to hunt me but he was scared of hurting me.

  Another sound of the bell broke our moment, but he still didn’t respond. There was a multitude of emotions washing over his face. I wished I could read his mind and his eyes, but at this moment—he wasn’t giving me any clue. Yes, I could see desire, but there was also fear lurking somewhere too. There was something melting in him—a glacier he had been carrying over his heart, which had started to thaw all of a sudden.

  The bell disturbed us again.