by Jenna Jacob
The joy, completeness, and unconditional acceptance I’d found with Joshua in the few short days I’d known him brought new meaning to Sanna’s words. I didn’t know what the crazy connection we shared meant, but it meant something. Maybe not love, but definitely something.
“You mean a lot to me too, Joshua.”
A contented smile settled over his face. “Look, I know things are a mess right now, but later when it’s all straightened out, do you think you might ever consider moving to Chicago?”
“To Chicago, or in with you?” I asked, watching his expression closely.
“To Chicago, first. The rest, we’ll take one day at a time… see what happens,” he clarified with a slight smile.
Four weeks ago I would have responded adamantly, ‘No’. Although I was swimming in unchartered waters, Joshua suddenly didn’t seem an imposing shark—at least not at the moment. It was flattering, and a wee bit scary that he’d given conscious thought to a relationship with me. Sanna was dying for me to be closer to her. If I lived in the same city, we wouldn’t miss out on so much of each other’s lives. Besides, if I lived closer maybe I could make up for running away from her like I did.
“Yes, I’ve thought about it a time or two. Sanna wants me to move; she’s made that crystal clear. After my last visit, I realize how much time I stole from the two of us.”
“Don’t. Don’t live with regrets.” He shook his head. “Learn the lessons life has to teach, and do your best to move on.”
“Is that what you’ve done? After Veronica and Camille were taken from you?”
Joshua’s expression turned stony. I’d never mentioned his wife or daughter before. I wasn’t sure if he was going to shut me out or open up. Honesty and communication had to be a two-way street if he wanted me to consider pulling up roots and moving to Chicago.
Joshua didn’t answer my question. He simply looked down at our empty plates, plucked up the check then pulled out his wallet. Tossing some money on the table, he stood and extended his hand.
“We’ll talk in the car.”
Back on the road, he reached down and wrapped his hand in mine. The air felt heavy and I swallowed tightly, worried that I’d touched on a topic too painful for him to discuss.
“Veronica and I were high school sweethearts. She was an amazing woman, wife, sub and mother. Aside from my parents, there wasn’t another person on the planet who encouraged me to follow my dreams the way she did. I won’t lie and say we had a perfect marriage—there is no such thing. Everyone has their ups and downs, but our ups surpassed our downs ninety percent of the time.”
I sat quietly, strumming my thumb over his and listening as he began to open up about his past.
“We never formally joined any lifestyle groups. Hell, I didn’t even know Genesis existed until after she was gone, but we invented our own power exchange, I guess you could say. Our desires were polar opposite. She was a natural born sub and me?” He shrugged. “A Dom. I haven’t let anyone touch me below the surface since she died, until you.”
Staring out at the road, lost in memories, he fell silent for several long seconds.
“Surviving isn’t easy, but I can’t wrap my head about losing… how you survived the loss of little Camille.”
Joshua swallowed tightly. I could swear tears were welling in his eyes. “I’m sorry, Mellie. I’m not ready to talk about her yet. I don’t know that I’ll ever be.”
I reached over and trailed my fingers over the side of his face. “You don’t have to. It’s okay.”
Blinking rapidly, he cleared his throat.
“I owe you an explanation for what happened that night at the club… in my room. The night I lost my mind and my control,” he scoffed softly. “When you brought out that amazing submissive and begged to please me… begged me to use you hard?”
“Yes,” I whispered.
“I haven’t had a submissive draw out my Dominance in such a profound way, since Veronica died.” Silently I drew his hand to my lips and placed a soft kiss upon the back of it. “I’m so fucking sorry I lost it that night and hurt you. I could sit here and make excuses for my behavior till the sun comes up, but I’m not going to do that to you, or to us. I’ve thought a lot about that night and I realized I hadn’t totally come to terms with losing my wife… my daughter… or that level of Dominance.”
“I did it on purpose,” I softly confessed. He darted a glance at me with a quizzical expression. “I didn’t want you holding back on me. I wanted all of you… all your Dominance. That’s why I begged so hard, and it was beautiful. You were beautiful.”
“Thank you for telling me that, little one. It helps ease my guilt.” He gave my hand a squeeze before he continued. “I hadn’t realized that I’d not dealt with the past, until it came up and grabbed me by the throat. You took me out at the knees… totally blindsided me, Mellie. The flashback was brutal. I tried so hard to shove all those feelings back in place.” He darted a bittersweet smile my way. “I never expected to feel that level of freedom again.”
“You feel guilty about it, don’t you?”
“I did.” He nodded. “But not anymore. Veronica wouldn’t want me putting a tourniquet on my Dominance. She’d want me living it fully. I do, too. I want it with you… all of it with you. Not just a few days. Not a week here or there. I want to be the Dominant part of your life—in every sense of the word.”
Gripped by his profound declaration, no tendrils of fear or a sinister panic assaulted. Before I could second guess my timing, I turned toward Joshua and inhaled a steady breath.
“I’ve decided to move to Chicago.”
Snapping his head my direction, he blinked. “Just like that?”
I giggled. “Yes. God, I’m either a fool or I’ve lost my mind, but yes. I’ve tried to convince myself that this thing… this connection we share would never last. I still don’t know if it will, but when I was in England, all I could think about was coming back to you. I couldn’t erase you from my mind. It was even hard for me to totally focus on work. It’s never been like that before. I’m tired of fighting this crazy wire that runs between us.”
This time he was the one who drew my hand to his lips.
“So would it freak you out completely if I told you I’ve fallen pretty hard for you?”
My heart literally skipped a beat. “I… ah… yes.”
“Fair enough. I’ll save that for a later conversation.” He shrugged with a wolfish grin.
“Good idea,” I mumbled, then swallowed tightly.
Several silent minutes passed as Joshua’s claim swirled through my head like a tornado. I cared for him deeply, but was it love? I’d never been in love with someone before. Infatuated, yes… but it usually wore off in a few days. Days, hell, weeks had passed and it still hadn’t worn off with Joshua. Time would tell.
Reaching Albuquerque a little past midnight, Joshua pulled into a resort. When we checked in, he requested the penthouse suite. Too exhausted to squabble over his extravagant choice, I wasn’t going to argue if he wanted to pamper me.
After ordering champagne and strawberries from room service, Joshua filled the massive spa tub. Slowly stripping me bare, he kissed my shoulders, neck and breasts before clutching me to his hard body and claiming my mouth. His forceful control made my head swim and my heart soar. Mentally and physically wiped out, I held onto him, grateful he’d been the one by my side through the most craptastic and magnificent day of my life. While I had no desire to re-live the terror Davis Walker orchestrated, I’d take Joshua opening up and sharing pieces of his heart with me any day.
Joshua led me to the tub. Easing down into the swirling hot water I watched him unbutton his shirt and peel it off. Dropping my gaze, I stared at his taut, lean muscles, the wiry blonde hair between his flat brown nipples, and his washboard abs. My mind filled with memories of the perfection I found beneath his powerful body. It was as if I’d waited a lifetime for the man, and in many ways I had.
“Please,” I
whispered boldly.
“What is it you want?”
“To touch you,” I murmured as he knelt by the side of the tub.
A broad smile adorned his face. “Is that all you want?”
“For starters,” I purred as I raked my nails through the hair on his chest before flattening my palm against his hot flesh.
Leaning in, I rested my head on his shoulder before pressing my lips to his skin. I licked at his salty flesh as I skimmed a hand up to cup his nape.
“Get in with me,” I murmured.
His body shook softly in a silent chuckle. “Giving orders, are we?”
“No, Sir. I…”
“I’m teasing you, girl. I’m waiting on room service. They should be here any minute.”
“Call them back, tell them to either hurry up or forget it,” I replied with a playful pout.
“Didn’t I teach you a lesson about patience at dinner?”
“Yes, but three weeks without you felt like three years.”
There was a loud knock on the door.
“I’ll be right back.” Joshua grinned.
Moments later he returned carrying a tray of plump ripe strawberries and a bottle of champagne chilling in a shimmering silver clawed bucket. I smiled as I watched him pop the cork, pour two glasses then set the plate of strawberries on the ledge at the back of the tub.
Sliding the leather belt from its buckle, Joshua toed off his shoes and socks then released his zipper. His hard and ready cock sprang free. Finally the wait was almost over.
Hurry. Hurry.
Picking up his champagne in one hand, he fisted his thick erection with the other, edging closer to the side of the tub. As he stepped in, I eased back to give him room. Instead of joining me, he stepped in, then sat down on the edge. Eye-level with his turgid cock, I licked my lips, antsy and impatient for his command.
Lowering the glass to my lips, he smiled. “Take a big sip but don’t swallow. Hold it to the back of your throat.”
Filling my mouth with the fizzing liquid, I tilted my head back as he instructed and parted my lips.
“Good girl.”
A spark of satisfaction burned in my core as he circled the slick crest around my lips. Gazing into my eyes, he pressed inside my mouth, and I wrapped around him. Tickling cold bubbles surrounding his hot flesh and when I swirled my tongue around him, Joshua let out a hiss of pleasure.
Setting the glass aside, he wrapped his fingers in my hair and clenched. The sting from my scalp raced down my spine, gathering over my clit.
Guiding my mouth up and down, I slid my tongue over the sensitive spot beneath the crest. He sucked in a gasp, issued a hoarse curse, and kept right on pushing my head up and down over his velvety steel. Pleasure played across his face and filled me with satisfaction that I could bring him such exquisite sensations. Filling my mouth over and again with both champagne and his cock, I basked in his guttural noises and rumbles of pleasure, but best of all were his raspy praises.
Sliding into the tub alongside me, he reached up and plucked a ripe strawberry. Pinching off the stem, he tapped the tapered end upon my lips. When I opened my mouth, he placed the fruit between my teeth then dipped his head, biting into it as he pressed his lips over mine. Tart, sweet juice exploded over my tongue as we feasted on the berry, sucking and slurping before he eased his body over mine. Surging inside me with a savage thrust, he skimmed his hands over my wet flesh, pinching, and plucking my nipples as he swallowed my cries of pleasure. In an achingly slow rhythm, he thrust deep and dragged out, stretching me tight and full. The blissful burn spreading over my swollen lips was the sweetest agony in the world.
“I missed you. Missed the way my body responds to you like this. Missed the feel of your touch, your scent… the way you scorch me to the bone,” I gasped, freely conveying all the feeling within.
“Yes,” he hissed. Arching his hips, he ground his crest over my g-spot. “Beg me to use you again, little one.”
Staring at me expectantly, he wanted me to summon the beast. I searched for some glimmer of guarantee that it wouldn’t turn out like before, that his demons wouldn’t resurface and drive a wedge between us again. After the rollercoaster events of the past twenty-four hours, I didn’t think I’d be able to handle the magnitude he sought me to stir.
“Joshua…”
“It’s okay, baby. I have to prove to you that it’ll be all right. Tell me, girl, do you want to please me?” He nodded.
Reaching up, I stroked his face and slowly shook my head. “No,” I murmured. His expression fell, dejected and lined with regret; I’d disarmed him with my reply. Drawing my thumb over his soft lips, I gazed at him, penetrating past his gloom. “I need to please you, Master. Take me wildly. Don’t hold back. I ache to bring you joy.”
His brows furrowed and his eyes narrowed as his nostrils flared. Yes, I’d poked the sleeping lion inside. Arching my hips to meet his, I urged him to unleash the beast and set it free.
“Again, little one,” he demanded in a raspy, hungry whisper.
“Take me. Mark me. Own me, Master. Please,” I purred.
An animalistic groan rumbled from deep in his chest. Joshua gripped my hips and hammered into my gripping cunt in an unrelenting frenzy. Water splashed between us, sloshing up and over the tub. Bending his head, Joshua sank his teeth into the tops of my breasts, biting and gnawing, marking me. Angry red welts dotted my alabaster flesh as he slammed into me, savage and untamed. My surrender soared, spellbound by his driving command.
“Who do you belong to?” he demanded.
“You, Master. I’m yours… all yours,” I panted, bucking against his driving shaft.
His chest expanded and a wild cry tore from his lips. Yanking me off his cock, Joshua jerked me out of the tub and hauled me to the sink. Dripping wet, he bent me over the vanity as he gripped my hair and pulled my head back in front of the mirror.
“Look at yourself, Mellie,” he ordered as he spread my ass cheeks apart and slammed inside my cunt, claiming both my reflection and me. “Look how fucking gorgeous you are.”
I slid a gaze over my lurching body, my breasts swaying with each driving thrust. My hard, cranberry-colored nipples were drawn up, wrinkled and hard. The outline of his teeth had branded into bright red welts and my face glowed in a flushed red hue. Staring into my eyes, I peered past the hunger and lust, catching sight of the woman that yearned for freedom, within. She was stunning, peaceful and serene.
“You can finally see her, can’t you? Look at that striking submissive you had trapped inside you. She’s mine, now. All mine, isn’t she, little one?”
“Yes,” I moaned.
“Yes,” he echoed. Scraping his teeth along my shoulder, he swiped his tongue up the column of my neck. Wrapping his lips around my ear lobe, he tugged and nipped. “I’m dying to claim all of her… her joys, her sorrows, her fears… triumphs and failures. Is that what you want me to do, girl?”
“Yes, Master. Yes.”
Joshua hissed as he skimmed a palm between my shoulder blades, pressing me down upon the cool marble. Held hostage to his gaze in the mirror, he withdrew from inside me, keeping the crown of his cock nestled between my burning folds. His eyes narrowed and his jaw ticked.
“You. Are. Mine. All of you. Mind. Body. Heart. Soul. Everything you are. Everything you’ll ever be. Is. Mine.” Snarling through clenched teeth, Joshua emphasized each vow with an arduous thrust.
Tears spilled from my eyes. My soul felt like it was disintegrating while yet morphing into someone or something else, tranquil and restored.
“Yours,” I affirmed with a cry.
Sliding his finger to my pussy, Joshua strummed my throbbing clit, unraveling the thread of control I’d been clinging to. Clenching around his demanding thrusts, I tried to hold tight as the arcs of release spread through my limbs and up my spine.
Slamming himself to the hilt, Joshua stilled, seated inside me. I felt his cock jerk as he groaned out a command for me to ‘come�
��. Milliseconds before I shattered, I watched him suck in a gasp, felt his cock pulse, and as he begin to fill me as he let out a deafening roar.
A scream of deliverance ripped from my throat, fused with his and echoed in my ears. Leaning over me, Joshua sank his teeth into my shoulder, pinning me to the marble surface as he spilled inside my spasming core.
My legs felt like wet noodles, and I gripped the countertop for support while Joshua dried my shivering body. His reverent touch—the total dichotomy of the beastly way he’d claimed me—warmed my heart and moved me deeply.
“You’re utterly amazing, little one,” he praised as he wrapped a dry towel around me. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
“No, Master. It was perfect,” I whispered on a dreamy sigh.
Approval and pride lit up his face as a smile played over his lips.
Drying himself off, we made our way through the sitting room and into the bedroom. Staring at the inviting bed, I all but drooled. Spent and ready for sleep, I dropped the towel and started to pull back the covers.
“Stop,” Joshua issued in a firm command. “Kneel.”
Dropping the fabric, I frowned and turned to stare at him. Joshua cocked his head and shot me a look warning it wouldn’t be wise to challenge him. With a wistful glance at the bed, I knelt at his feet, lowering my head and eyes to the floor. Waiting several long seconds, Joshua finally sat down on the edge of the bed.
“Look at me.”
Raising my chin, I slid a gaze over his naked body before linking with his beautiful eyes. Power, satisfaction, and passion reflected there. A tiny smile tugged at my lips.
“We have some unfinished business to discuss, little one.”
Still riding the lingering sparks of bliss, my brain couldn’t find the path he was on. Drawing a blank, I issued a slight shake of my head and gently shrugged my shoulder.
“What were the last words you said to me on the phone in the UK?”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Shit. He wanted to discuss that now? After the mind-blowing exchange we just had? Why did he want to rehash my ugly behavior now? Couldn’t he wait and make me grovel in the morning?
