The door of Willie’s house opened and he came out onto the porch, backlit by the light from inside. Shoney sensed Willie’s presence and jumped up, always ready for the next adventure.
Willie came down, rubbed the dog’s head, and then picked up the box of Shoney’s belongings and carried them up the steps.
Kayla buried her face in Shoney’s coat, so soft and silky.
Shoney couldn’t see, and she couldn’t hear very well, but she made up for that in an ability to sense emotions. She licked Kayla’s face and pressed closer into her arms.
Get it over with.
She picked up the dog, carried her up the porch steps and set her down, handing the end of her leash to Willie. “Thank you,” she whispered.
Willie nodded, his weathered face kind. “I’ll take care of her. She’ll be all right.”
Kayla nodded, turned and walked toward her cabin, her eyes almost too blurred to see. She couldn’t go back and help Leo when she was a wreck herself. She stopped in the cool night air and drew in big breaths, trying to pull herself together.
Down at the main house, she saw a few lights. Penny had come in a hurry, leaving the place lit up.
And there was a single light on in Finn’s place. The front room. She pictured him there in his recliner, reading. He liked old Westerns and Western history books. Rarely watched TV. They had that in common.
So, yeah, he was probably reading.
But she’d never know what.
The thought of that—that she’d never get to tell him a silly little thing like that she’d finished the Louis L’Amour book he’d lent her—made her shoulders cave in. The loss in her stomach and chest hurt too much. She wrapped her arms around herself.
She’d thought since they had all those weird things in common that they might have something. She’d imagined sharing books and listening to country music together, on into the future.
But it wasn’t only about that.
It was about the caring in his eyes. The respect she had for him as a man. The way they both worked hard at life, and tried to overcome past challenges with an upbeat attitude.
In the end, they hadn’t overcome. She shouldn’t be surprised, but she was. Like a fool, she’d gotten her hopes up.
She looked up at the stars and tried to pray, but God seemed as distant as they were.
She drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Then another. Good—she was steadier. She turned and marched toward her cabin.
Through the screen door, she heard Leo sobbing. Her heart gave another great twist.
“I don’t know if I can do this, Father,” she said to the cold, glittering stars.
But she had to. No choice, when you were a mom. She squared her shoulders and headed into the cabin.
Chapter Ten
The men’s Bible study, which consisted of a circle of nine or ten men at Willie’s house, was breaking up. Men stood, talked, helped Willie to clear away the refreshments he and Long John had made.
It was pretty obvious to Finn that Willie hadn’t needed any extra help tonight. Calling Finn and saying he did had been a ruse, probably done in cahoots with the pastor.
Finn didn’t really mind. Because one, he had nothing else to do; and two, he’d gotten thought-provoking ideas out of it.
Something bumped against his leg, and he looked down and saw Shoney. A bad feeling came over him. “What’s she doing here?” he asked Willie.
“Kayla’s leaving tomorrow, and she felt like she couldn’t take Shoney along. She doesn’t know where they’ll land, what kind of place they’ll live in or where they might have to stop along the way.” He paused. “I put Rockette back in the kennel for now, but I can’t leave her there.”
That made him sigh, and he knelt and rubbed Shoney’s sides, causing her to pant and smile.
She was okay now, with Willie. She was a resilient dog. But going back into the kennel, with her disabilities, wouldn’t be a good thing.
And what must it have been like for Kayla and Leo to let Shoney go? They’d gotten so attached. Her blindness and deafness hadn’t been any kind of barrier to them; they’d accepted her as she was, and they loved her.
It must have just about killed them to leave Shoney behind. The thought of it put a lump in Finn’s throat.
The father of the boy who’d nearly hit their car came over and clapped Finn on the shoulder. “Glad to see you here tonight, because I wanted to thank you again,” he said. “Without your driving chops, that accident could have gone a lot worse. If we had to collide with someone, I’m glad it was you.”
Finn clenched his teeth to keep himself from snarling at the man. Finn wasn’t glad it had been him, because it had broken him apart from Kayla and Leo.
But that was a good thing, right? Because it kept them safe. Safe from the unsafe Finn.
Who this man was saying was actually extra safe. That didn’t compute at all.
“My son, man, he’s still beating himself up about it,” the man continued, oblivious to Finn’s inner turmoil. “I wish he’d been here tonight to hear what the pastor had to say. We’re none of us in control, not really, are we? Once something’s past, you can’t keep beating yourself up for it, I told him. You’ve got to move on.”
“Right,” he said as the man moved on to talk with someone else.
All the words he’d said swarmed in Finn’s head and he didn’t know how to process them.
We’re none of us in control.
But he wanted to be in control. Wanted to be able to protect anyone on his watch.
He was the man of the family. He was supposed to be able to protect women and children. Back in the Middle East, his was one of the few units that hadn’t had a failure in that regard. He hadn’t killed any civilians, and neither had any of his men.
He supposed he’d come back cocky, thinking he was superhuman.
The punishment for that arrogance had come real fast.
He folded up the extra chairs and stacked them on the porch to carry down to the main house, then went back inside to see if Willie and Long John needed anything else.
They didn’t, of course; they were fine. “Glad you could come,” Long John said. “Mighty sad about that gal and her boy leaving us. Sure you can’t talk ’em into staying?”
Long John’s voice sounded plaintive, and Finn realized that these two old men had grown attached to Kayla and Leo, too. She’d listened to their stories, laughed at their jokes and appreciated their efforts to father her. And Leo had become a grandson to both of them.
“Sure am going to miss them,” Willie said.
Everyone liked Kayla and Leo. No one wanted them to leave.
An idea of stopping at her place started to grow in the back of his head. She wasn’t likely to forgive him for being so mean to her and Leo, but at least he could explain. Apologize. Pave the way for her to be able to come back for a visit, at least, see the old guys and Penny.
He hoisted the chairs to his shoulder, said goodbye to the last couple of men who were coming out of the cabin.
“Want me to drive those down the hill?” Bowie Briscol asked. “That’s what I usually do when we meet here. No need for you to kill yourself hauling them.”
Finn started to refuse and then thought, Why not? Obviously, Willie and Long John had manufactured the excuse to get him to come, but they’d had a good thought in doing so. They were doing their best to take care of him.
That was what Redemption Ranch was all about. People taking care of each other. And, he realized, he wanted Kayla and Leo to have the chance to be taken care of a little bit, too.
He couldn’t repair the fragile thing he and Kayla had started to build, but could he maybe get her to agree to stay on? It had to be safer for her, better for Leo. They needed security and stability. Redemption Ranch could provide that.
He helped load the chairs into the back of Bowie’s pickup, waved off the offer of a ride for himself and then strode toward Kayla’s cabin, feeling more energized than he had since their falling-out.
There was a car outside Kayla’s cabin. Not her old beater, but a late-model, city-style sedan.
Finn stopped and took a few steps back. Under veil of twilight, he watched as a tall, broad-shouldered man in a suit walked up to the door, opened it and went inside.
Heat rushed up Finn’s neck. She’d gotten together with another guy this quickly? He’d been having all these feelings for her, and she was basically cheating on him?
Like Deirdre?
And with some suit in a fancy car, who probably had enough money to give her the life of luxury she didn’t need, but probably wouldn’t mind having?
His fists clenched and he hit the road to his place, making it home in record time.
When he got home, he went in the bedroom closet and started digging through boxes, frantic as a loon. He knew what he wanted to find and why.
It was a box of photographs of the years with Deirdre and, later, Derek. He’d hidden them away because it hurt too much to look at them, but he needed to now. Needed to remind himself what it felt like to live with a cheater. To remind himself that women couldn’t be trusted.
He pulled out the wedding album, flipped through it and stuffed it back in the box. When those pictures were taken, they’d been happy, of course. Deirdre had been faithful to him, before the wedding and at least through the first year.
It was when he’d gone to the Middle East that she’d changed. He could track it in the pictures she’d sent, that he’d pasted up around his bunk like a fool, showed off to the other guys. She’d lost weight and done up her hair fancy, started wearing high heels.
She’d looked great.
Only when he’d come back had he realized she wasn’t doing it for him—not for him alone, anyway.
They’d fought, separated, almost broken up, but then she’d gotten pregnant. It had infuriated her that he’d insisted on a paternity test, but given how much she was running around, it had only made sense to him. When Derek had turned out to be his baby for sure, he’d thought they could mend things between them.
And they had, for a while. The first couple of years of parenthood had been hard, but happy. But when Derek had entered his terrible twos, Deirdre had had her own rebellion.
She’d had issues, obviously. And Finn, young and immature and haughty, hadn’t dealt with them well.
He shoved the photos back in the box and leaned against the bed, straightening out his leg, flexing it. The idea that he’d fallen for another cheater...
But even as he had the thought, he was comparing what he’d seen with the reality he knew.
Kayla wasn’t the type who’d go into town and pick up some new guy in a bar, just because she’d had a fight with Finn. She just wasn’t. And no, he and Kayla hadn’t had a relationship, not really, but they’d had the beginnings of one. She’d felt it. She’d said it herself: we have something here.
And a woman like Kayla, feeling like that, wouldn’t go looking for love somewhere else—not so soon, at least.
There had to be another explanation. A friend, cousin, brother. It would make sense if she’d called someone to help her out, and he should be glad she had a little male protection.
He didn’t feel glad, but he knew he should.
As a matter of fact, he should call his detective friend and tell him there wasn’t anything more to search for. Whatever secrets hid in her past, he didn’t need to know them. Because through all that had happened, he’d actually learned to trust Kayla.
That was some kind of progress, at least.
He walked outside for some air, scrolling through his contacts to make the call, when the familiar, rattly sound of Kayla’s car came along the road. It made him smile. He was always glad to hear it, glad she and Leo and that beater of a car had made it back to the ranch in one piece.
No sooner had he thought it than worry tugged at him. When she left the ranch, where would she go? Who would be there to notice she’d made it safely home? To worry if she hadn’t?
He’d give her a call later, see if they could talk a little. In preparation for that, he lifted his hand in a wave.
She stared back but didn’t wave in response. Her face was set, rigid. She gunned the bad motor and continued up the hill.
Well. Maybe talking to Kayla wouldn’t quickly mend the broken bridges between them.
But at least he could call off his watchdog.
He found his friend’s name and clicked the number.
* * *
Kayla drove the rest of the way up the dirt road that led to her cabin, confused. Why had Finn waved?
She was not going to get excited because the man had waved.
Leo, depressed about it being his last day of camp and about Shoney, had finally fallen asleep in the back seat. Fortunately, he hadn’t seen Finn’s semi-friendly expression. No use getting his hopes up again.
No use getting hers up, either.
Today had been her last day of work, too, and that had been hard; saying goodbye to all the dogs, working alongside Penny because Finn was AWOL.
Her heart was shredded and she had a million things to do and he waved?
She glanced back at Leo, his face sweet and relaxed in sleep as it hadn’t been since she’d let him know they were leaving. The day-camp group had given him a little goodbye party today, which was sweet. But not surprising. That was the way Esperanza Springs was.
She pulled up to the cabin and stopped the car. When she leaned into the back seat and tried to pull the still-sleeping Leo out, she could barely manage it. Asleep, he seemed to weigh a ton.
It had been so great when Finn had carried him to bed.
She shifted, getting her feet under her, getting him adjusted on her shoulder. She wouldn’t have Finn helping her anymore. And guess what: she didn’t need him. Her muscles were far stronger now than they’d been six weeks before, when she’d started at Redemption Ranch. And it wasn’t only her muscles that were stronger. So was her mind and her confidence.
She shouldered open the front door. It was good to be home. Despite all the turmoil, she’d sleep well tonight.
She took another step and froze, just inches inside.
Why had the door been partly open? She always locked the door when she left.
Even as she reviewed the moments when she’d left the house, she stepped back. One step. Two.
The door swung the rest of the way open. And there, inside, stood Mitch.
She jerked back and Leo stirred, so she forced her body into stillness. How had Mitch found her? How had he gotten into her house? Where was his car? Sweat broke out on her face and back. “What are you doing here?” she asked around a stone of terror that seemed to have lodged in her throat. “Where’s your car? How did you find us?”
“I pulled the car around back.” He leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms, and his presence in this place felt like a violation. “Oh, and by the way, that was a real cute photo of my son on one of the Eighty-second sites.”
Kayla sucked in a breath. Had Finn posted a picture? Surely not, but...
“Nice how the name of the town was right there in the picture,” Mitch said, his voice and stance casual, his eyes anything but. “Esperanza Springs Community Days. What kind of a town did you bring him to? It’s not even American!”
“The Fourth of July.” Kayla closed her eyes, just for a second. That soldier Leo had mistaken for Mitch. Kayla had gotten the man’s wife to delete the photos with Leo, but several other people had been around. One of them must have taken a photo and posted it. Probably thinking a closed group website was safe.
No time to wonder why Mitch had been browsing through a random Eighty-second sit
e. No time to wish she’d been more diligent about keeping cameras away from Leo.
They’d been found. Now she had to find a way to keep her son safe, against all odds.
Seeing Mitch brought back the last time, his big boots kicking her as she’d lain on the floor, trying to breathe, trying not to wake up Leo, gauging the distance to the door, escape, safety even as she’d known she could never leave her son in the house alone with his father, not even for a minute.
She backed to the edge of the porch. The worst thing she could do would be to go inside with him. Out here, with the stars starting to twinkle overhead and the cool, piney breeze from the mountains, she had freedom and a chance.
“Get in here.” It wasn’t a suggestion, but an order. “Want to talk to you.”
Despite his casual posture, his hands were fists and his eyes burned beneath a furrowed forehead. If she ran for it, holding Leo, she’d only make it a few steps before Mitch caught them. Leo would wake up and be afraid.
If Mitch had to fight her and drag her inside, his rage would boil over. If she went inside as he’d asked, it might placate him for a moment.
She nodded and walked through the door and tried not to feel doomed when he closed it behind her. Despair and hopelessness wouldn’t save her son. “Let me put Leo down.”
Maybe Leo wouldn’t have to see this and get traumatized again. Maybe she could talk Mitch down, make promises of seeing him tomorrow, get him to leave tonight. And then she could call Penny and Finn and the pastor and anyone else she could think of to get her out of this bind, because, yeah, she was independent, but she had people to help her now. She wasn’t alone.
Mitch stood in front of her, blocking her way, and her stomach twisted. She’d forgotten how big he was. He could knock her out with one blow from his ham-like hand.
She knew. Knew, because he’d done it.
She straightened her spine. “Let me pass. I want to put him down so I can focus on you.” And get you out of here.
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