by Alla Kar
Silence. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. The worry line on her face was deep, and I could tell she was thinking hard about something. “Want to talk about it?”
“A little,” she whispered. “You can sit down.”
I walked slowly to her bed and sat facing her on the opposite side. My boots hung from the bed. She’d almost whooped my ass when I put them on her bed before. Not doing that again.
Her midriff Power Rangers shirt showed an inch of her smooth skin, but as beautiful as she looked, I couldn’t help notice the frown on her face. “What’s goin’ on?”
“I found somethin’ today that I’m confused about. And my mom acted weird about it.”
I snorted. “Weirder than normal?”
She giggled and nodded. “Yeah, much weirder. Look.” She grabbed a worn photo from her nightstand and handed it to me.
Wow. She looked like Josie and her mom. A lot. The green eyes, blond, hair and face shape. “It’s you,” I said.
“That’s what I thought. But my mother doesn’t have any siblings. Not that I know of, at least. She never mentioned any.”
“And she freaked out when you mentioned it?”
She nodded. “She yelled at me and told me to leave. I don’t know what to do to find out. I think I’m goin’ to ask my dad. Or Bug. She’s been living here all her life. Or maybe I could ask someone around my parents’ age?”
Nodding, I handed her back her picture. “But that might stir up gossip in this small town. I think sticking with your family is your best bet.”
She nodded. “Probably.”
“Speaking of family, is your dad doin’ okay?”
“The same. I only have a few weeks with him and all we can do is sit in the hospital room. It hurts knowing he’s wastin’ away. But I guess knowing he’s leaving is a good thing. I can mentally prepare for it.”
Reaching forward, I cupped the side of her face to lift her gaze to mine. “Are you doin’ okay?”
The smile she gave me was half-assed. “I’m fine.”
“Are you really?”
A tear slipped from the corner of her eye. “No, not really. I just—I just want to start all over. I don’t know why my mother hates me or what my parents are hiding. And now the only parent that likes me is dying.”
I pulled her against my chest and leaned back, stroking her hair. It felt so normal. I’d held her like this so many times before, and yet this felt more real than any other time. They say you don’t know what you have until it’s gone, and that’s the truest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.
“Shhh, Raven. It’s going to be okay. We’ll figure this out together.”
She nodded into my chest, and tightened her grip on my shirt. “Don’t leave tonight,” she whispered.
She wore her insecurities on her sleeve and it broke my heart. I was the one who had put them there. She was already cracked, and I finished the job, shattering her. Anger was rising under my skin. “I’ll stay as long as you want me to.”
“Don’t leave like last time,” she said.
“Baby—I’m so sorry,” I whispered. “I never meant to hurt you. I wish I could just tell you, but I can’t. I just can’t tell you.”
“Will you ever tell me?”
I don’t know. Telling her after her dad passes may hurt worse than telling her while he’s alive. “Go to sleep, Raven. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
She sniffled into my neck. “Promise?”
“I swear.”
***
Josie
Boone’s arm served as a pillow and a heater. The sound of his breath was so familiar and comforting that I didn’t want to get up, even when I smelled breakfast cooking downstairs.
“How much longer are you goin’ to pretend to be asleep?” Boone whispered.
“As long as I can get away with it.”
Boone’s chuckle shook his chest, and his hands tightened around me. “I can’t believe I spent the entire night in your bed. This is a first. We’re normally up by six.”
The truth was that I hadn’t slept that well since I’d been home. “Well, no one is goin’ to come up here, so if you need a shower we can—” I stopped myself. What am I doing? Every part of me wanted to take a shower with him, but I was still scared.
Boone lifted onto his elbow and looked down at me through hooded eyes. “It would be a first for me. I’ve never taken a shower with a girl before.” His smile widened and he nipped my bottom lip.
Nerves hummed through me, but I bit them back. “Follow me,” I said. I crawled out of bed and walked toward my shower. Clothes were scattered along the floor, and I kicked them out of the way.
Although I looked calm, my entire body shook with anxiety. We’d just had sex a day before, but I felt like this was our first time again. I turned the water on and waited for it to warm before I grasped the bottom of my T-shirt.
But Boone’s arms came around me. “Let me help,” he whispered into my ear. Chills shot through my body from the warmth of his mouth.
Carefully, he pulled the hem of my midriff over my head and turned me to face him. He’d gotten rid of his shirt, which gave me the best view of his chest. Those broad shoulders were strong, and each ripple of his abs sent a wave of heat to my core. How was it possible to be this beautiful?
He took me in slowly from head to toe like he’d never seen me before. His arms hung at his sides, but his fingers twitched against his thighs. His heaved-lidded gaze sent signals in-between my legs and made it impossible to breathe.
“Do you regret leavin’?” he asked, his voice raspy and deep.
Did I? I’d always told myself I left because it was the best thing to do, but I wasn’t really sure anymore. The truth was that I’d cried for an entire two months after I left. There hadn’t been any reason to stay, and that’s what hurt the most. My mother didn’t care, Boone had left me, and my father was too busy with my mother’s problems to deal with me.
Leaving seemed like the only option. “I’m not sure. At the time I thought it was the best thing.”
Boone nodded, reached out, and trailed his fingertips against my cheek. “I’ve never missed anybody more than I’ve missed you, Raven.”
Then why did you leave? I wanted to ask him again, but it was obvious he didn’t want to tell me. Or he couldn’t. I pushed back the frustration building in my chest. Maybe there is a legitimate reason why he left.
The fact was that I was in love with him and didn’t care why he left. I just wanted to know that he’d never do it again. “You promise me you’ll never leave me again?”
The contrast between his blue eyes and blond hair was beautifully rugged against his strong face. “Baby,” he whispered, stepping forward. “I will never leave you again, unless you want me to.”
It was then I knew that he didn’t want to leave me. He had a look of desperation in his eyes, and his hands were so gentle against my face.
“Kiss me,” I whispered.
The intensity on his face dropped and his smile widened. “I can do that.” He bent his head, interlaced his fingers into my hair, and pulled my mouth toward his. All my pent up emotions from the picture, my parents, and life slipped away and into oblivion. Every calloused touch was warm against my smooth skin.
Boone’s tongue slid against my lower lip for entrance, but he nipped my bottom lip before I could open for him. The palms of his hands slid down the curve of my neck to the bottom of my shorts, and before I could help him, he had everything off and into the laundry basket. “Do you know how long I’ve dreamt about doin’ this to you again? Or how much I missed you after you left yesterday? One time, two times, it’ll never be enough. I missed you so much,” he mumbled into my mouth.
I clutched his shoulder and opened my mouth wider for him. “I know exactly what you mean,” I whispered. “I cried for months, Boone—”
“Shh, baby.” He palmed the back of my head. “No more tears. You’ll never cry another goddamn tear over me. And I’ll kick
anyone’s ass that makes you cry.”
Smiling, I stepped backward and gestured for him to follow me into the shower. The water was almost too hot on my skin, but I couldn’t take my eyes off of him as he shed his clothes. The jeans he wore looked so good when he climbed into my window the night before but looked even better off of him.
The red boxer briefs on his hips held in the bulge that I was dying to taste again. The smile on his face lifted as he hooked a finger inside of the elastic and slid them down his thighs. If I hadn’t known what to expect, I would have gasped. Knowing that he would fill me up nicely had me soaked.
Boone stepped into my shower and slid the glass door shut. He took up most of the room, but it didn’t stop him from pressing me against the wall and devouring my mouth. There was something about the way he kissed: so slow but deliberately hungry, that eased my mind of everything.
“You taste too good,” he whispered, dropping his gaze to my lips. “I used to daydream about the way you’d taste during class.”
Heat engulfed me. “I used to want to jump you after football games.” I laughed, but I trailed off as his mouth made its way down my neck. “The way those football pants fit you.”
Boone’s palm engulfed my hip and the other pushed between my legs. “You can see me in those pants whenever you want, baby girl.”
His rough thumb pressed against my clit and made slow circles. “You still have them?” I whimpered.
He grinned down at me. “Yeah, and if you’re good, I’ll show ’em to you.”
Placing my hands against his chest, I pushed him from me and dropped to my knees before he could stop me. “What are you—oh, shit,” he said, his fingers twining with my wet hair.
There was no way I could fit him all in my mouth, but I pushed him back as far as he would go and gripped the base of him. “Just like that,” he said, leaning his head against the glass door.
I smiled around him and quickened my pace, watching as his toes curled beneath me. Sucking him to the back of my throat, I pulled him in by his ass and held him there. When his eyes began to roll backward, he grabbed my shoulders and hauled me upward and onto his hips. “Your mouth is amazing, Raven.”
I moaned as I felt him nudge my entrance. “I didn’t get to finish.”
He pressed more of himself into me. “You really want me to stop?”
“No.”
“Are you still on birth control?” he asked into my ear.
I couldn’t speak, so I nodded.
“Good.” He rammed himself balls deep into me and a cry broke from my lips. I didn’t care that Bug was downstairs cooking breakfast or if she heard me; all I cared about was how amazing he made me feel.
Boone groaned and ran the pad of his thumb against the corner of my mouth. “I can’t imagine anyone feelin’ better than you.”
Tears brimmed from the corner of my eyes as he filled me up over and over again. “Please,” I said, not sure what I was begging for.
Boone leaned his forehead against my own. “Please what?”
“More.”
Boone screwed his eyes shut, gripped my ass in his palms and fed me all of him. Every inch of my body shivered for him. I needed Boone to let loose with me, to claim me like I knew he wanted to. Like I wanted him to.
“This what you want?” he asked into my ear.
“Yes, all of it. All of you.”
His growl sent the building ache in my stomach over the edge. The sounds coming out of my mouth were foreign and loud, but not one cell inside of me cared. My fingernails dug into his shoulders, and I tightened my legs around his waist while he pumped into me, bringing my orgasm to the highest peak. “That’s it,” Boone said. “Right there.”
I tossed my head back and stared at the ceiling. “Oh, God.”
Boone’s smile widened; he dropped his head against my shoulder and plowed into me harder than before. “Tell me you still love me,” he whispered.
Tears began to mix with the waterfall against my face. “I never stopped,” I whispered. “I’ll always love you.”
Boone’s grip tightened and he pulsed inside of me, his head dropping against my shoulder. We stayed like that for several minutes. Neither of us wanting to move. He felt so right inside of me that I knew my body would crave his when he pulled out.
“The water is gettin’ cold,” Boone whispered.
I grinned and closed my eyes. “We should probably get out. Bug might come up here in a while. I smelled breakfast.”
Boone nuzzled my neck and slowly pulled away before shutting the water off. Coolness engulfed me and I shivered as he grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my shoulders.
“Come here,” Boone said, wrapping a towel around his waist. I stepped into his arms and looked into his eyes. “You’re so beautiful.”
“You don’t have to butter me up now; you’ve already gotten some.”
Boone snorted and cupped my face. “I mean it. You’re so beautiful and I’m so in love with you.”
“I wish it could always be like this,” I whispered, scratching his scruff.
Boone searched my face. “I don’t want you to leave. Stay with me.”
What? My mouth parted, and I stammered. I couldn’t come back here. My life was in California. “Boone, I—”
“Surprise, Sookie!”
What the fuck? I twirled around to the bathroom door to see Samantha and Bug standing in the doorway.
“Holy fuck, Sookie,” she gasped. She pointed at Boone and mouthed, “Is that him?”
My cheeks burned fiercely and my heart plummeted. But it wasn’t Samantha staring at Boone that shocked me—it was the anger written on Bug’s face. Before I could do anything, Bug turned and bolted out of the room.
What in the hell just happened?
Chapter Fifteen
Josie
“Oh shit,” Boone said, raking his fingers through his hair. “What in the hell was that about? She looked really pissed.”
“I don’t—I don’t know. Samantha, what are you doin’ here?”
Sam’s smile widened and she offered Boone her hand. “I’m Samantha, Sookie’s roommate from Cali. You must be Boone.”
Boone lifted a brow but took her hand. “Sookie?”
I narrowed my gaze. “Don’t ask,” I mumbled. “So, what are you doin’ here? You didn’t mention you were flyin’ to Arkansas last night when I talked to you.”
“That’s because it was a surprise. Surprise!” She tossed her hands in the air. “I just couldn’t stand how sad you sounded.”
Well, it worked out really well, Sam. “Okay, so I’m happy to see you and all, but I need to get dressed and see what’s wrong with Bug.”
Sam frowned. “I hope I didn’t interrupt anything.”
Boone grinned. “No, we were finished.”
I gave him a long sideways glance. “Shut up.”
Samantha turned and walked over toward my bed. “You didn’t tell me your parents were loaded, Sookie. This place is huge.” She fell backward onto my bed.
I rolled my eyes and started getting my clothes together. “Y’all probably should stay up here while I go down.”
I tossed my towel and started pulling on my clothes. Everything raced in my head and I couldn’t think of one reason why she’d be so upset. He wasn’t naked or anything. Boone’s hands stopped me. “Are you sure? You’ve got that look in your eye.”
I sighed. “I don’t think you comin’ is a good idea. She’s obviously upset about it.”
Boone frowned. “I guess that’s just another person to add to our list, huh?”
Giving him a fake smile, I patted his cheek. “Get dressed. I’ll be right back.” I stopped at the door and glanced back at Sam, who sat on my bed, wiggling her eyebrows at me. “In the bathroom. Get dressed in the bathroom, Boone. With the door closed.”
I walked downstairs to the kitchen. Breakfast was still on the table, but Bug’s chair was empty. When I rounded the corner, I found her in the laundry room. “Bug
?”
She whipped around to meet my gaze. There was a frown on her face which was something I’d never seen. “Josie, that boy doesn’t need to be in this house.”
I swallowed and swayed on my feet. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was such a big deal. I mean, I’m nineteen—”
“That’s not what I’m talkin’ about missy. I’m talkin’ about that Cross boy being with you in this house.” She closed her eyes and hung her head. “If ya daddy found out he was here just to get some cookies with Jace, he would have a heart attack. If he knew you two were back—”
“You know about that?” I asked, brows furrowed. “You knew my dad didn’t want me datin’ him?”
Bug’s lips thinned. “I don’t have a problem with him. Your dad does, and this is your daddy’s house. I know a lot more about you than you know, Josie. Now you listen to me, little girl. If I catch that boy in this house again, it won’t be pretty. Your daddy is dying and I’m not sure if he’d be able to handle the news. If anybody found out about y’all and it got back to him … ” She shook her head. “Tell him to leave and not to come back. I’m goin’ into town to shop and he better be gone when I come back.” She turned and left.
A heavy weight pushed down on my chest. How on earth did Bug know about all of this if she’d just started working here? My tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth and I could taste the bitterness of guilt.
No. No. No. Screwing my eyes shut, I lowered myself to the floor and covered my eyes. The one person I’m not supposed to be with is the one person I can’t live without. And even as my father lay dying, asking me to stay away, I can’t help but latch onto him like a second skin.
“Raven.”
I didn’t look up, but I let him wrap his arms around me. “Tell me what’s wrong. Did Bug leave?”
I nodded into his chest and grasped his T-shirt. “She says you have to leave. She knows that my dad doesn’t want you here.”
Boone stayed quiet for several seconds, running his fingers through my hair. “Why are you cryin’, Raven? It’s no secret that your dad doesn’t want me in this house.”
