***
Drawn back to the present, by the concern in Tierney’s voice as she sat down beside him on the couch, he looked at her.
“Hey, you okay?” she asked. He knew she must wonder what he’d found when he went back to their village, but he’d never been able to tell her. It was too horrible. He didn’t want the same images filling her mind, tainting the way she thought about everything. But the way she looked at him now, made him swallow. It was like she knew, or was aware of how he felt about the massacre.
“Ah, yeah.” He cleared his throat and nodded, focusing back on the TV instead. Tierney turned and stared as well, when a horrifying news bulletin caught their attention.
An amber alert flashed across the screen. A series of pretty, blonde-haired girls had been abducted in their area over the last five years, and another had just gone missing. “Huh. What’s with everyone disappearing?” Tierney mumbled. Jax shook his head. It saddened him that people could be so horrible, not just his own kind, but all beings.
They switched off the TV and talked about the wolves. None of them liked the idea of Soroyan joining them, but with the possibility of the Ilyium involved, they realized they may need the wolf.
That night, Jax couldn’t sleep. He went outside and stood out under the cloudy night sky, trying to concentrate on changing into his dragon. But he failed at that as well, his beast stayed hidden and not a tingle of magic showed itself, not even his dark rage. Discouraged, and wishing for Tierney’s company, he headed inside.
After hanging up his coat, he wandered through to Zander’s office. He stood in the doorway inhaling the scent of books, leather, Itarium steel and wood polish. Under all that was Zander’s comforting, masculine scent.
Shiny, mahogany recessed shelves, filled with books and Itarium weapons, matched the desk and file cabinet. While another wall displayed various swords, it was only a fraction of the weaponry they owned. More weapons filled a small room hidden behind the far bookshelf. That room, which also doubled as a safe room, was protected by a spell that only allowed the four of them access.
As moonlight streamed into the office, Jax left the light off and made his way around Zander’s desk, lowering himself to the high-backed leather chair. He wanted to feel closer to Zander, but as he thought of the male who had been like a father to him, Jax only felt more alone.
Yes. Sami, Zander and Tierney all cared about him, but years of fearing they’d discover the broken little boy inside of him, made Jax push them all away. They didn’t need his problems. Zander, where the hell are you? Jax’s mind spun with worry until he thought of Tierney. He ached to go to her, crawl into her arms and have her tell him everything would be okay. Being around her always helped to calm him. She gave him strength.
Jax kicked himself mentally. Instead of her reassuring him, he should be the one protecting and reassuring her. Oh, but how she affected him. He only needed to lay eyes on her, think about her, or catch her scent—fresh wildflowers—and he sported instant wood. Never mind when one of them brushed up against the other. It embarrassed him, always trying to hide his desire for her. Zander would have been horrified at Jax’s thoughts toward his daughter.
At least he had a bit of a reprieve from being a walking hard on when he stayed in the city. He used to wonder if sex with another woman would make him stop reacting to Tierney so fiercely. But no other woman aroused him, even if they always wanted to touch him.
He was surprised Serena had managed to make him as hot and bothered as she had, but then, without the Awakening and her sick ass magic, he’d never have been attracted to her. He hadn’t been feeling good, and should have just stayed home. But he didn’t, and he had no one to blame but himself. He’d walked right into that mess.
Thoughts of that night at the club filled him once again with guilt and shame. Just watching Tierney dance with Damien, had driven him nuts. Then when he pulled her onto the dance floor, she had rocked his world—tore right through him, straight to his soul.
His thoughts slipped to when he was ten, and Marcius sold him to those two men. What nasty, fucked up freaks. The things they did … No! Don’t think about the bad time—think about something—anything—else. A panic attack threatened, and Jax pushed the memories away. If he went down that road, he might not come back. He couldn’t bear it if Tierney found out what the men did to him.
Jax thought about her anger at the club, and later on the mountain, and how it affected the elements around her. Her eyes turned a deep glowing violet and the wind whipped her long, curly hair all over. Just thinking of her made his heart ache for what he couldn’t have.
She’d been so stunning. Jax groaned, why did he crave her—need her—so much? Closing his eyes, he sighed. He knew why. Tierney made him feel loved, and that scared him. He feared losing her love, even if he didn’t deserve it, and he knew he didn’t. His soul was too damaged, blackened.
The moonlight hit the steel blade of one of the daggers on the shelf, making it shine. The sight reminded Jax of a conversation he had with Zander a year ago.
“Jax, I need you to promise me to take care of Tierney, and your brother if something happens to me,” Zander said from where he sat behind his desk.
“Why, you planning on going somewhere and not coming back?” Jax asked flippantly, as he lounged in a chair in the front of Zander’s desk.
Zander shook his head with a wry smile. “I want to be prepared for anything.”
“Yeah, well don’t get any ideas. We like you here, just like you are.” Jax was uncomfortable with the conversation and really didn’t want to contemplate Zander not being around.
“You’re a good male, Jax,” Zander said, staring at him intently.
“C’mon. Stop with the sucky shit.” Even more uncomfortable, Jax had scowled and glanced away.
But Zander continued to stare at him and wait.
“Fine. Shit—sorry.” Jax glanced at Zander then hung his head. He knew what he was and good was not what he’d call it—Marcius had taught him well.
“You’re wrong, Jax. He was wrong.” It was as if Zander had read his thoughts, but Jax’s shields were up, preventing such a thing. Zander just knew him well. Jax shook his head and pursed his lips.
“You are, Jax, and I’m proud of you. You may not be my blood but you are my son,” he said, making Jax’s heart start to pound as he glanced up in surprise. Then, to his dismay, tears welled up at the love he saw shining in Zander’s eyes. The large male rose, came around his desk, and then leaned back against it and held something out to Jax. “I trust you, Jax.”
Swallowing, Jax stared down at the dagger. It was the one he’d used to kill the man in the meadow, the man who had tried to hurt Tierney all those years ago.
“I want you to have this,” Zander had said, holding it out to him.
Shakily, Jax took the dagger into his hands. The Itarium steel was clean and shiny, and showed no indication that it had ever been covered in blood. The weapon was deadly, and beautiful at the same time. Jax studied the intricate scrolled dragons, before moving to the three suns of their homeland depicted on the blade and hilt.
“You earned it. I love you, son,” Zander said.
“I love you too, Dad.” Jax stood up uncertainly, his eyes overflowing while Zander, with tears in his own eyes, pulled Jax into a hug, and for the first time he didn’t flinch when anyone but Tierney touched him.
Zander, where are you? Tierney needs you, Sami—I need you. Jax got to his feet and glanced at the shining dagger up on the wall once more. Then turning away, he left the room and went upstairs. Walking past his own room, he stopped outside of Tierney’s, suddenly uncertain.
They often slept together when they were younger, and thought nothing of it. But they grew up and things changed. His feelings toward Tierney intensified. Now he realized that he’d loved her even back when he was a small child.
Feeling silly standing outside her door, Jax made his way inside, approached the bed and glanced down. His eyes
drank her in, noticing how peaceful she looked for the first time in days. Her long, silky, dark hair curled around her, and Jax fought the urge to crawl into bed and run his fingers through the softness. Wanting to be there for her in case she needed them, Jax and Sami had both slept with her the last few nights. But now that Zander might be alive, and they had somewhat of a plan, she didn’t need them there. Still, it didn’t matter, the ache to hold her in his arms was one he had to resist.
Chapter Fifteen
Were-wolf Den
ZANDER PRAYED FOR DEATH as fire rushed through his veins once again. Please Father, watch over all my children. I am ready to go home now. I’ve given you all I have. I can’t do this anymore. As need consumed him, his body tightened in response, making his broken leg twitch. Zander ground his teeth as pain shot through him. But even the pain didn’t douse the fire raging for release.
The Ilyium wanted information, and when he refused to talk, they broke his leg, saying he’d be more manageable. They re-broke the same leg when it started to heal, demanding he tell them where the other Dracones, and Fallen on Earth lived. Still, he kept silent, so after his chest and back became a patchwork quilt, they started on his fingers, cutting them off one by one. Next, they took his hands, his arms, and lastly, his one good leg.
Almost a week later, his broken leg itched and burned while it healed wrong, and his amputated, slowly re-growing limbs wracked him with excruciating pain. But none of that had broken him. Nothing did, until the red-headed bitch with the perky little tits and tight pussy. Oh, how he hated that woman. He wasn’t sure where Red fell in the Ilyium food chain, but she seemed to be in charge of the scientists who came to take blood from him daily.
After severing his limbs, they moved him to an enclosed room in another tunnel, with a bed, a night table, and a light they kept on twenty-four-seven. At first, Zander didn’t understand why they’d moved him from his dark, rock-walled cell. Then he figured they wanted to make things easier on the people who came to feed and clean him, and to see to his needs. But that wasn’t the reason at all.
The real reason turned out to be Red, the bitch who fucked him. Nothing about her turned Zander on, as his lack of arousal proved. But the bitch, angry when he failed to respond to her, resorted to using magic.
Ilyium magic had grown weak over the thousand years since the curse, so Zander was surprised at the amount of magic Red actually wielded. His surprise turned to brutal anger when Red used a spell to make him crave her. More than that, she made Zander hunger, and ache unnaturally for her.
He tried to fight it and willed himself not to grow hard—but failed. No longer in control, humiliated and degraded as his body betrayed him over and over again, Zander slowly began to hate himself.
After that, just the sight of her made him stiffen in response, until by the end of the day, the sound of Red’s footsteps coming down the tunnel gave him an aching erection. The next day, her scent, drifting down the hallway, sent need thundering through him. The bitch came to him three times a day and rode him like a prize stallion.
The more she fucked him, the more he hungered for her, and the more his hatred grew. He no longer needed to hear, smell or see her, he just automatically hardened every few hours, and if she didn’t come to him, he was left in excruciating pain, unable to do anything about it.
Zander couldn’t figure out why she bothered with him though, unless she hoped to get pregnant, something he prayed would never happen. But still, her reason for fucking him was baffling, since she never got off. She often came close to orgasm, but that was all. When she was done with him, she left angry and twitching, as if she needed something more.
His ten years with his wife, Aryhanna had been the best of his life. He had given his heart and soul to his mate—the mother of his two children, and although she died in the attack on their village, she still owned his heart.
So, the pleasure he experienced as he spilled his seed inside the bitch, broke him like nothing else had. Self-loathing, guilt and betrayal of his true love, threatened to choke him, bringing forth a resurgence of grief and loss over Aryhanna’s death that grew stronger each time Red visited.
Please forgive me for my thoughts and actions, Father. Tears streamed down his face, tears he couldn’t wipe away, even as he throbbed for release. Where the hell is Red? She’s late. He needed her. Damn it to hell! He burned, his body full of need, while his thoughts filled with hatred, and Zander prayed for forgiveness at his desire to die.
The Ilyium’s plan to take his head during their ceremony changed after Tierney’s spirit visit. The black-robed, masked Master swung the sword and narrowly missed Zander’s head. Now he prayed to his father, the Divine One, that Tierney wasn’t the cause of the changed plans. Connected to his daughter as he was, it didn’t surprise him that she’d found him, he only prayed no one else had sensed her.
Still, he hated to give up, especially with unresolved business like the search for his son. Everyone believed that Cristoz had died in the massacre back on Tartaria, but Zander refused to believe such a thing. Even now, his sister Raven continued the search for his boy. Raven used to patrol the Fallen, but she had started hunting the Ilyium, after the brutal murder of her mate, twenty years before. But after the attack on their village, he had enlisted her help in finding his son as well.
Unfortunately, as the years had passed, Zander started to lose faith. He thought he’d never see Cristoz again, until the stone in Tierney’s choker, the one that represented his boy, began to flicker. It didn’t last long, but he knew it had to mean that Cristoz lived. He had suspected his son had entered a portal somewhere, and with renewed hope, began to search in earnest for his boy once again.
Struggling to breathe as a cough wracked him, his mind grew foggy as he worried about Tierney, Sami and Jax. He knew Tierney would keep her promise—she wouldn’t have a choice, and while he hated having manipulated her feelings into making the vow, it had been necessary. As long as the others didn’t come looking for him, they might all be safe. He needed to know his children were safe, before he went to the heavens. Please, let them stay safe.
Zander was fiercely proud of all three, and wished he could tell them that one last time. He loved Sami and Jax as if they were his sons by blood. Knowing he wouldn’t be around for them, filled him with another kind of agony.
After receiving a phone call with information about the traitor, he had set up a meeting with his informer. But when he arrived, an hour early, and stayed an hour past the appointed time, his informant hadn’t shown. Finally, Zander had driven away. A little later he stopped at a rest stop, and after that everything became one big blur, until he awoke, groggy and laying in a cold, damp cell. Someone had drugged him. How, or with what—he had no idea.
Everyone believed him to be a Fallen, and he encouraged that falsehood. After a few thousand years, keeping the secret that was necessary to protect himself and his sister, became easier. They were both actually avenging angels for the Divine One, sent to the ground to patrol the Fallen. It was their job to punish any that failed to obey their Father’s laws, or put them to death. But after a thousand years of living with Fallen and Dracones, fighting to keep both safe from their hated enemy, Zander ended up a leader and protector, even Lord of their clan.
For years after being sent to the ground, Zander had heard his father’s voice, giving instruction, or final orders. He felt his father’s love and praise, but over the years he stopped hearing the familiar voice. Not knowing if he still listened, Zander once again spoke to the Divine One, praying to be heard.
Having visited Earth long before he ever moved here, Zander set things in motion for the time when he might need to leave Tartaria. Later, when he brought Tierney and others of their clan to Earth, the people who came with him, along with the ones already here, automatically looked to him to lead them. Zander couldn’t refuse.
He never shared his knowledge of the whereabouts of the Dracones and Fallen on Earth with anyone, and he didn
’t plan to start. Still, they tried, though they failed to get anything out of him.
***
TIERNEY CRAWLED OUT of bed before sunrise flooded the world, unable to sleep any longer. She dragged a brush through her unruly hair and dressed, grabbing her jacket and phone. Then, shouting at the boys to get moving, she hurried downstairs to start the coffee. She needed to get outside before the mountains soaked up the pale pink rays of day, turning dark into light. It was her favorite moment of every day, and Tierney did not want to miss this one. She’d missed to many lately.
Taking a sip of coffee, she pushed open one of the French doors in the great room, and walked out onto the balcony. The white-capped mountain peaks, along with the partially frozen lake, proved that it had snowed the night before. Giddy anticipation raced through her, as the first faint rays touched the far peaks.
Hearing movement inside, she glanced back to see Sami up. She waved and turned back, not wanting to miss the start of a new day. Hope filled her heart as she waited for that single second when time stood still, as night turned to day.
A deep, pinkish glow spread up and over the mountains, like silky tentacles, slowly illuminating the snow. The light reflected, glass shards, all angles and lines off the glistening lake, as Sami joined her at the railing.
“Just in time.” She smiled and leaned her head on his shoulder.
Dracones Boxset Books 1-5 Page 16
