“It’s okay if you say no to what I’m about to ask.” His voice faded away to nothing. Could he even choke out the words?
Her fingers tightened around his. “Ask me. I’ll do anything.”
“Vargas isn’t content to have killed my brother. He’s put a price on my head as well.”
Her eyes dilated, and her lips parted.“Your kids have gone through so much.They can’t lose you too.You should move far away where he can’t find you.”
“I don’t run from trouble,” he said.
“Maybe you should start!” The color leached from her cheeks, and her eyes seemed to fill her face.
“The thing is—if I die, my kids have no one.They’d go to foster care.”
“No!” she muttered fiercely. “I’d care for them, Michael. I wouldn’t let that happen.”
It was the kind of reaction he’d hoped for. “Protective Services wouldn’t let you without being approved.”
She bit her lip. “I see. I could seek approval.”
“I don’t think it would be that easy, Gracie.You’re trying to hide your identity.” He knew he’d scored a hit when she bit her lip and withdrew her hand.
“What can I do, then?”
“We can help each other.You need a new name for Hope. I need a mother for my kids. I don’t want them to grow up motherless. I hated coming home to an empty house.”
Her hand crept to her mouth. “Wh-what are you saying?”
“I’m suggesting we marry.” He took possession of her hand again. “Separate bedrooms. I know we don’t love each other, but I like you, Gracie.”
Her fingers squeezed his. “I like you, Michael. More than I should.”
He barely heard that last sentence, but it made him feel warm inside. “You’re kind to the kids, and I think you will love them. I can love Hope too.”
“I love Jordan and Evan already,” she whispered.
“It’s a good solution to our mutual problems. I can adopt Hope, and you can adopt my kids.”
“You’d adopt her? Legally? Why would you do that, Michael? Take on responsibility for us that way?”
“It’s a risk for you too,” he reminded her. “You’re taking on the care of two more kids, and not just temporarily.”
“This would be. . . permanent?”
“Well, yeah, isn’t marriage usually permanent?” He tried to smile and failed. “I’ll be good to you and Hope, Gracie.”
“I don’t doubt that. It’s just. . . I don’t know what to do.”
He forced enthusiasm into his voice. “You and Hope can start a brand-new life.”
“We can enroll Hope as Hope Wayne instead of Lister. Get a different birth certificate,” she said.
“It’s a good solution, I think.”
She quit trying to pull her hand away, but her eyes had widened. “It seems. . . extreme.”
“It is. But the circumstances we’re in are extreme too.”
Her brows wrinkled. “I don’t know, Michael.”
“Think about it. But think fast.We don’t have a lot of time if we want to hide that you’re both here.And I have to be at work every day. Something could happen to me at any time.”
“Why don’t you quit, then? Get a different job.You don’t have to be in the military or the Border Patrol.”
“The military is all I know.”
“You’re smart.You could do anything.”
Her words bolstered his hope. “My dad was a major in the Air Force, and he raised us to serve our country. Besides,Vargas’s men can find me no matter where I go.”
“But why? You’ve done nothing.”
“He wants revenge. It’s that simple.”
“Why me?” she whispered. “You don’t really know me.”
“I can see your good heart, Gracie.”
Those long lashes fluttered fiercely. “I’m not what you think.”
“No,” he agreed. “You’re more.We make a good team.”
Her smile peeked out. “We do make a good team.”
“I hate to ask anyone for anything, but you need me as much as I need you.”
“Cid would never find us,” she said.
He nodded. “It’s mutually beneficial, and that’s something I can live with.” Better than a real marriage. He’d tried that once and failed. This seemed. . . safer somehow.
He saw the light come on in her expression, and she nodded. “Separate bedrooms?”
“Absolutely.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll make the arrangements. I think we can do it today.The waiting period can be waived for me.”There was no good explanation for why his heart was beating so hard. At least no reason that he’d admit to.
TWO WEEKS AGO, GRACIE WAS ABOUT TO MARRY ANOTHER MAN. NOW, HERE she was in jeans and a white blouse, about to say, “I do,” to a man she barely knew. She must be crazy. No, not crazy. Desperate.
They’d dropped the kids off at Rick and Allie’s. Michael thought it best to explain to them tonight when there would be time to deal with the questions. Her flip-flops slapped against the tile floor. The sound rose and bounced against the walls in a crescendo that brought a burst of red and gold to her vision.
Who ever heard of getting married in jeans and flip-flops? She glanced at Michael. Or jeans and a T-shirt? She wished for a nice summer dress and sandals at least. Michael strode along beside her with his shoulders squared like a man heading to the gallows with courage. Was that how he felt?
Michael’s confident stride faltered as they neared the judge’s chambers. “You’re sure you’re ready to do this?”
“I’d be lying if I said yes,” she whispered. “But I think it’s the best thing for our kids. I’m just scared.”
“I’d rather face a sniper in the Iraqi desert,” he said, grinning.“I know we’re not starting in a normal way, Gracie, but I’ll be good to you.”
“You’ve already done more for me than any man I’ve met.”
“I’m not a stingy man, and anything I have is yours. Just love my kids, that’s all I ask.”
“I already do,” she said, searching his face. “I won’t spend your money recklessly.”
“Our money,” he corrected. “You’ll have a checkbook and ATM card. Money means nothing to me. All that matters is my family.”
She could learn to love him. The realization made her knees sag. They could have it all—the family she’d always dreamed of. No, she didn’t love him yet, but if she let herself . . .
He caught her by the hand. “You okay?”
“Ye-yes, I’m fine. Scared, like I said.” She would not allow her emotions to get tangled up. She’d been that route before. Love made her vulnerable. This was an arrangement to help them both. They would be friends, but nothing more.That’s all he wanted. And all she wanted, too, of course.
“Let’s do it, then.” He held open the door for her.
She entered into a cavernous room that smelled like it had been in existence for a hundred years. The ancient odor left the taste of something like tea on her tongue. The late-afternoon sun slanted through the window and touched the old but solid wood furniture. The black and white tile dated from another century. Faint music played.The delicate Chopin made her see pink crystals dancing in the air.A good sign maybe?
She’d never put much stock in her sixth sense, but maybe she should let herself believe.
A woman sat behind the desk. The bailiff stood nearby, pen in hand to sign as witness. The judge’s shrewd gaze from behind steel-rimmed glasses caused Gracie to look away.
“Good to see you, Judge Thompson,” Michael said. “It’s been a long time.”
“The last time you were in this courtroom, you’d been out tipping cows,” the judge said, her voice severe. “At least you’re a law-abiding citizen now.”
Tipping cows? Not the Michael Gracie knew.What had happened to his life that stripped him of his fun-loving side?
The woman turned her attention to Gracie. “I’m Judge Julia Thompson. An
d you’re the bride. Gracie Lister, is that right?”
“Yes, ma’am. Er, Judge.”
“Are you both entering this agreement of your own free will?”
Gracie glanced at Michael. “Yes,” she said.
“You bet,” Michael said.
“Good.” The judge turned to Michael first. “Michael, will you have this woman to be your wedded wife, to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, and forsaking all others, keep you only unto her, for so long as you both shall live?”
Gracie hadn’t been to a wedding in a long time. She’d forgotten what the couple promised. Oh, to be comforted and loved for her lifetime! That was only a dream, wasn’t it? How could Michael even promise something like that?
“I will,” he said in a steady voice.
“Gracie, will you have this man to be your wedded husband, to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, and forsaking all others, keep you only unto him, so long as you both shall live?”
A knot lodged in her throat.What did she know about honoring this kind of sacred vow? She opened her mouth, but nothing came out.
“Gracie?” Michael asked in a whisper.
“I will,” she said in a firm voice.
“Soldier, take your bride’s hand.”
Gracie clutched his hand like a life raft. Heart palpitations filled her chest. Maybe this was a mistake.
The judge’s no-nonsense tone droned on. “Repeat after me: I, Michael, take you, Gracie, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, to love and to cherish, from this day forward.”
Michael repeated the words, his voice steady.
Cherish. Had there ever been such a lovely word? Gracie’s parents had cherished her once. Once upon a time, she thought God did too— until she couldn’t think of him without shame. Until she didn’t deserve anything from him.
She realized the judge was waiting for her to repeat the vows as well. “Sorry.” Gracie managed to get through the vows by clinging to Michael’s warm hand.
“Do you have a ring for the bride?”
Michael nodded and dug a plain gold band out of his pocket. He slipped it on her finger, and she thought she might suffocate. She had no ring for him. Nothing to give him. She was a pauper who would be on the street if not for him.
The cold band encased her finger, and she stared at it. The vows she’d just spoken mocked her.What did she know about any of this? She’d been running for years without taking time to develop real relationships. She was a poor judge of character—look at how Cid had blinded her.
“Do you have a ring for the groom?”
Gracie started to shake her head, but Michael slipped another ring into her hand. “Yes,” she said, closing her fingers around it for a moment before she slipped it onto his finger. So that’s where he’d gone right after lunch.To get rings.
“Inasmuch as Michael and Gracie have consented together in wedlock and have witnessed the same before this company, and pledged their vows to each other, by the authority vested in me by the State of Texas, I now pronounce you husband and wife.” The judge smiled. “You may now kiss your bride.”
Gracie looked up at her tall, handsome husband. Her gaze went to his firm lips, and her own parted. Michael took advantage of her unspoken invitation and leaned down. His warm breath touched her face, and she inhaled the scent of him, a scent that had attracted her from the moment she met him. His warm lips probed hers.
She wasn’t quite certain about the sequence of events that followed. One second she was returning a chaste kiss, and the next she had pressed her lips to his in an ardent embrace and had her arms wrapped around his neck.The kiss heated the pit of her stomach and made her gasp for air. If she didn’t know better, she would have said Michael was kissing her like he meant it.
She tore herself out of his arms. Heat flamed in her cheeks, and she didn’t dare look at him.What must he think of her?
9
MICHAEL’S WEDDING RING CLUNKED AGAINST THE STEERING WHEEL OF HIS truck. He’d either made the biggest mistake of his life or. . . He couldn’t finish the thought. His gaze slid to his bride, who sat pressed against the opposite door of the truck as if she might jump from the truck any minute.
“I. . . I’m sorry,” he said.
She turned her head from the passing yucca and prickly pear cactus. “Sorry?”
“For the kiss.” He cleared his throat. “I had no right to kiss you like that.You don’t have to be afraid.”
She straightened. “I’m not afraid.”
He raised one brow at her. “So that’s why you’re about to bolt out the door?”
A slight chuckle escaped her lips. “I. . . I’m just not sure about what we did.”
“It’s a little late now,” he said, his tone sharpening. “The marriage is legal and we’ve signed the papers to apply for adoption of the kids.”
“I know.” Her head fell back against the headrest. Caesar took advantage of her proximity and swiped his tongue across her cheek. She sat back up. “What’s next?”
“We wait for Wally to call.The papers are signed, and he thought he could rush it through.”
“How long?”
“Maybe just a couple of weeks. Judge Thompson will work with him.”
“So you have to stay alive until then.”
“Something like that. Would you be sorry if I died?” Her lips parted, and her eyes widened. “Scratch that,” he said. “Stupid question.”
“Yes, it was.” She grabbed her purse and began to rummage through it with jerky movements. “I wouldn’t have married you if I didn’t think we could at least be friends, Michael. I’m not some kind of mercenary who marries for money or security. I thought this was going to be a partnership.”
“I’m sorry,” he said for the second time in two minutes.The kiss had changed everything. He’d thought he was doing this for clear, logical reasons.The way his memory kept returning to the softness of her lips had nothing to do with logic, though.
Her cell phone rang. She glanced at Michael, then laced her fingers together and looked away.
“Aren’t you going to answer that?”
“No.”
“Who has your number?”
“Just Cid and his family. One or two others.”
“No friends?”
She shook her head. “I don’t have many friends.” The cell phone quit ringing.
“Hiding your head in the sand doesn’t work. Isn’t it better to know what he wants?”
“I’d rather not worry.”
“How can you not worry if you have no idea what he might say? It’s illogical.”
“So I’m illogical. My life changed today. I’ve got enough to worry about without adding more.”
“At least check your caller ID and see who it was.”
“I’m sure it was Cid. And I don’t want to talk to him. Not today.”
He pressed his lips together and turned into the driveway that led back to the Bluebird Youth Ranch. Horses grazed on the other side of the fence.A particularly bony one caught his eye. “Looks like they’ve rescued a new horse,” he said. The bay had sores on his rump and a long cut, probably from barbed wire, on his chest.
Gracie glanced at the horse, then looked away. “The poor thing.”
“You don’t like horses.”
She fingered a scar on her forehead. “I haven’t been on one since I was thrown at twenty.”
“You shouldn’t let fear rule you.”
Her hands trembled, and she clenched them together. “I. . . I’m not a child, Michael. I’ve been running my own life without suggestions from you for quite a few years.” She inhaled quickly. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have raised my voice.”
Did she really think she was doing a great job of running her life? Had she forgotten he found her fainting from lack of food? He knew he should back off, but the words wouldn’t stay locked behind his teeth.
“Is that why you were on the run with no mone
y to your name and no way to care for your daughter?”
Her head came up. Her cheeks colored. “I guess I deserved that.”
He rubbed his head. “No. No, you didn’t. Strike that remark. I have no room to throw stones. Not with my track record of failure in my first marriage.”
“You sound like you have regrets.”
He gave her a wry glance. “I guess it was hard on her—my being deployed so long.”
The wariness in her eyes ebbed. “It was no less hard for you.”
“We were so young.” He raked his hand through his hair. “I’m not sure she knew what being a soldier’s wife meant. It seemed adventurous at the time.”
“Then reality set in. For both of you.”
“Exactly.”
“Did you fight a lot?”
“Yeah.” He shrugged. “She knew I loved her, but she didn’t respect the sacrifices I was making—for our country, for the kids, for her.”
“Did you think of her sacrifices? I’m sure she wanted to be with you.You were her partner, the man she loved.”
He scowled at her. “I gave her everything to make up for that, Gracie. I was the one in the line of fire every day. She didn’t respect that.”
Gracie nodded. “She had an affair, didn’t she?”
“Yep,” he said hoarsely. “I don’t like to think about it.”
Her gaze held his. “I won’t do that, Michael.”
He wished he could read the intensity in her eyes. “I never thought you would.”
Her eyes darkened, and she opened the door without saying more. Had he offended her in some way? Michael sat behind the wheel, breathing heavily. He’d blamed Kate for three years, but what role had his job played in the failure of his marriage? Surely he’d done everything he could to make her happy. If he was out of town, he sent flowers on her birthday and their anniversary. He wrote to her every day when he was stationed overseas. He called at every opportunity. When duty called, he made sure he answered.Wasn’t that what a man was supposed to do?
Now, he wasn’t so sure.
GRACIE STOPPED TO EMPTY HER FLIP-FLOPS OF SAND. FOR JUST A MINUTE, she’d allowed herself to hope they might be a real family, but she wasn’t sure Michael understood what being a husband was all about. Didn’t he know a woman needed the man she loved to put her first? Not his job, not his country, but her. And to say he didn’t think she’d have an affair—was it because he found her unattractive and thought other men would too?
Lonestar Homecoming Page 8
