by Ashlee Price
"I went to another bar," I answer. "I had a few drinks, then I stayed at a hotel."
Jess pokes her fork into the slice of steak.
"Don't worry," I tell her. "I wasn't with anyone."
Jess pauses. "I didn't ask."
She puts the steak inside her mouth.
"Good?" I ask her.
She finishes chewing. Then she wipes her lips with a table napkin and gives me a thumbs up sign.
I smile.
I've never cooked for anyone before. I must say it's satisfying.
"I'm glad you like it." I push the bowl of prawns towards her. "Please eat as much as you like."
~
"I think I ate too much." Jess rubs her belly as we sit on the couch after dinner. "Even after washing all those dishes, I still feel so full."
"Me too." I pat my own stomach. "I think I'll go to the gym tomorrow."
"You should," she tells me. "Women will stop throwing themselves at you if you gain weight."
I want to ask if that applies to her as well, but I don't.
Jess falls silent as she taps her pen on the notebook she has on her lap. Her eyebrows furrow.
"What are you doing?" I ask her curiously.
"Trying to write a song," she answers. "Kay wants to use it for our final show."
"Final?"
"Yeah." She stares at the ceiling. "The band is splitting up soon. Seems like everyone wants to grow up, move on and settle down."
"What about you?"
Jess shrugs. "I don't know yet."
I move closer to her and glance at her notebook.
"Doesn't seem like you've gotten very far yet."
She hugs the notebook to her chest. "Well, just so you know, writing a song isn't easy. In fact, most people can't do it."
"I know."
Jess closes her notebook and sighs. "Besides, I lack inspiration."
"Hmm." I scratch my chin. "Maybe I should take my clothes off."
She throws the pillow beside her at me.
"Don't even think about it." She crosses her arms over her chest. "Like that could be inspiring."
I just grin.
Suddenly, a phone rings. Jess gets off the couch and grabs hers off the counter.
"Hello," she greets her caller. "No. It's fine. I'm not busy. Why?"
Her voice trails off as she disappears into the bedroom.
I grab the remote and flip the channels in search of something interesting to watch. Jess returns before I find anything.
"Is everything alright?" I ask her as I put the remote back on the coffee table.
"Yeah." She sits down on the couch. "That was my sister checking on me. She does it from time to time."
I glance at one of the framed pictures on the shelf, one of Jess with a bride and groom, a man in uniform and an old couple.
I point to it. "Is that your sister?"
"Yup." Jess nods. "That was taken at her wedding. The other people in the picture are my brother and my parents."
"So you have an older brother and sister?"
"Yup. I'm the youngest." She turns to me. "What about you?"
"I've got an older brother and two younger sisters. They're twins."
"Really?" Her eyebrows arch. "They must be cute."
"They used to be."
She chuckles. "So you're the middle child, huh? I guess that's why you're the rebellious one."
I throw her a puzzled look. "Excuse me?"
"You know, they say the middle child ends up being the rebel because they're the easiest child to overlook."
I've never heard that.
"I don't think I'm-"
"Well, I don't believe it anyway," Jess cuts me off. "I mean, look at me. I'm the youngest child but I'm still the black sheep. That's why Laura worries about me a lot."
I feel more confused. "But you're doing fine on your own. You work at a nice cafe. You play the guitar well..."
"I didn't finish college like my parents wanted," she explains as she rests her head against the back of the couch. "They didn't want me to be in a band, either."
"Because?"
"They thought I'd end up becoming an alcoholic or doing drugs or getting a sleazy boyfriend."
"But you didn't," I point out.
"Besides, there's no future in playing in a band, and if there's one thing your parents want for you, it's a sure, bright future."
I nod. "Well, that I can agree with."
Jess turns to me. "What did your parents want you to be?"
"Obedient," I answer. "Responsible. Perfect."
Jess laughs. "Sounds like your parents and mine read the same manual."
I chuckle too. It's strange. Even though we're from very different backgrounds, we seem to be in the same boat.
Jess picks up her notebook. "Well, I really should be working on this song."
"I'll leave you alone." I stand up. "I've had a long day."
"I bet."
I walk to my room.
"Thanks for dinner," Jess calls after me.
I glance over my shoulder. "You're welcome."
"And good night."
"Good night."
As I hold the door knob, I hear a yawn behind me and I glance back at Jess again.
"Are you sure you don't want to go to bed yet? You look sleepy."
"I'm fine." She waves me off. "After all that food, I can last all night."
~
So she said.
Right now, though, I'm standing over a couch containing a soundly sleeping Jess. One of her hands rests on the open notebook that's on her belly. Her other hand is almost touching the floor near where the pen has fallen. Her soft snores add some rhythm to the humming of the air conditioner.
I sigh.
"You can last all night, huh?"
Gently, I pry the notebook from under Jess's hand and place it on the coffee table. Then I lift her in my arms.
She grunts but doesn't wake.
I carry her to her bedroom. She's lighter than I expected.
I set her down on the bed, and as I do, I notice that one of the buttons of her blouse has come off. Her black bra is peeking through the gap. I swallow.
I consider putting the button back in place but decide against it. Instead, I pull the blanket over her. She rolls to her side towards me.
I find myself staring at her face, at her thick lashes which I never noticed before, at her button nose and her full lips.
Yes, Jess is fascinating when she's all fired up, glowering and gritting her teeth, or when she's flustered and her cheeks are all red. But she's attractive like this, too, when she looks so peaceful and innocent.
Unable to resist, I brush back a pink strand of her hair. My finger grazes her warm cheek.
Just that is enough to send heat coursing through my veins. For a moment, I feel a strong urge to kiss her cheek, maybe even her lips. God knows I want to do more than kiss her.
But I keep myself in check and walk away from the bed.
After all, I'm pretty sure she's a virgin. If I give in to temptation, I'll just end up hurting her.
Strange. I've never had a woman that I wanted but couldn't have before. Nor have I ever had to worry about a woman's feelings, virgin or otherwise.
I place a hand on my heated forehead.
I guess Jess is one of a kind.
I walk out of her room, close the door behind me, and walk to my room. The bulge in my briefs throbs the whole way there.
She gets so mad at me when I tease her, but she teases me without even knowing it.
It's unfair.
I step inside my room and close the door.
It's going to be another long, hard night.
Chapter 7
Jess
It's morning?
I turn to the window and squint against the sunlight trying to sneak in through the blinds. I glance at my clock.
6:08.
Still early. Even so, I decide to get out of bed. As the blanket slips off me, I see the
blouse I'm wearing and my eyebrows crease.
Why am I still wearing my work clothes? Didn't I change into my pajamas? And why is one button undone?
Then I remember that I was working on my song last night. I remember lying down on the couch, too, to rest when my mind was starting to feel tired.
Wait. Did I fall asleep on the couch? Then why am I on my bed?
Only one explanation comes to mind, and it sends me stomping out of my room.
"Steff!"
I find him in the living room, already dressed and putting on his shoes.
He looks up to greet me. "Good morning."
I cross my arms over my chest and tap my foot on the floor. "Did you carry me to my room last night?"
"Well, I wasn't about to just leave you asleep on the couch," he says. "Your back would hurt, or you could catch a cold."
I guess that's understandable. Still...
"And did you do anything else?" I ask him.
He touches his chin. "Anything else?"
"Yes. Anything else."
He nods. "Right."
I knew it.
"I put the blanket over you."
What?
I go over to him and grab the front of his sweater.
"I'm asking if you did something to me, dumbass."
"Oh. You mean if I kissed you or groped you or...?"
I grit my teeth and wait for his answer.
"Sorry to disappoint you, but no," Steff says. "I didn't do any of that. I just put you to bed."
I step back and glance at my blouse. "Then why...?"
"Oh, the button. That was already undone when I found you asleep on the couch."
I stare at the button. Come to think of it, it has come undone on its own before, although I usually don't notice it because I'm wearing my apron or a sweater.
"Sorry," Steff says.
I frown. What on earth is he apologizing for?
He stands up. "I would have done something, but I don't lay a hand on virgins."
My cheeks grow red. "Who said I was a virgin?"
Steff chuckles.
"So you're saying you're not?"
I say nothing.
Steff takes a step forward. "Fine. Prove it to me. Kiss me right now."
My jaw clenches.
"Why the hell should I-?"
"Kiss me."
His deep voice caresses my skin and echoes in my ears, which suddenly feel warm. His narrowed blue eyes gaze into mine.
I find myself drowning in them, completely under their spell.
Steff moves even closer to me, and my body stays still even as my heart begins to pound a million miles an hour. His face hovers just inches from mine. His chest lingers dangerously close to my breasts. They begin to ache. The smell of his cologne drifts into my nostrils and I can't breathe.
"Well?"
He lowers his face and the soft strands of his hair brush against my forehead. I see my reflection in his eyes.
I can't look away.
My cheeks are burning, and it's not just my cheeks. My chest is aflame. My belly feels hot and the skin between my legs is melting, leaking. It aches and feels good at the same time.
And I can't fight it.
I let my eyelids fall and move my face forward. The last time, the kiss happened too fast, but I still remember how soft Steff's lips were as they pressed against mine. I hold my breath and brace myself for that same exquisite sensation.
It doesn't come.
Instead, I feel a pair of strong hands on my shoulders, keeping me in place. I open my eyes and see the grin on Steff's lips.
Those lips that I had been about to kiss.
"Just kidding," he says. "I think one kiss between us is enough."
One kiss is enough? That means he doesn't intend to kiss me anymore?
Wait. He was just kidding?
My hands curl into fists. "Why, you..."
"See you later." Steff winks before walking out the door.
My nails dig into my palms. My foot goes flying into the magazine rack.
Damn that Steff.
First, he kisses me when I least expect it, when I don't want it. Then when I am expecting it, wanting it even, he just walks off.
I clutch my chest where my heart is now hammering with anger instead of passion.
What is it with men?
~
"Welcome to my problems," Lisbeth tells me as we enjoy a cup of coffee at the corner table during our break. "And don't even bother trying to find a solution. Men are all complicated jerks. There's no use trying to understand them, much less trying to make them act reasonably."
I tap the rim of my mug. "I just don't understand why men have to be so mean. What did we do to deserve this?"
"Nothing," Lisbeth answers before taking a sip from her mug. "Like I said, they're not reasonable beings. They get their strength from making us look weak. They get their fun preying on our bodies and playing with our emotions even though they haven't got any of their own."
I shake my head. I'm hearing what Lisbeth is saying, but it still doesn't make any sense.
She sets down her mug. "This is about Steff, isn't it?"
I look up from my coffee. "What?"
Lisbeth leans forward. "Come on. Surely you don't think I still believe he's gay."
I glance at the counter and see Tom a considerable distance away. Then I turn back to Lisbeth.
"You know?"
"At first, I admit I thought he might be," she answers as she lifts her mug. "But then I've been watching you lately and listening to all the things you've been saying and not saying about Steff, and there's just no way a woman would act like that about a gay guy."
"Like what?"
"You have a crush on him," Lisbeth blurts out.
I'm glad I haven't taken another sip of coffee. I would have spat it out.
"No way," I tell her. "That's impossible."
"Considering what I've seen, it's possible," Lisbeth argues. "A guy as hot as that can make even the most tepid of women weak at the knees."
My eyebrows furrow. "Are you saying I'm tepid?"
"I'm saying there's nothing wrong with liking the guy."
I touch my forehead and sigh. "Haven't you been listening? That guy is a jerk and a tease and so full of himself. There's no way I'd like someone like him."
"Maybe he's teasing you because he likes you," Lisbeth suggests.
I frown.
"Or maybe he's just teasing you because you're easy to tease," she adds.
I narrow my eyes at her. "What do you mean by that?"
"You get easily upset when someone taunts you, and you get easily embarrassed, too, which is probably due to the fact that you're a virgin."
I roll my eyes. That word again?
"I'm pretty sure he's just a jerk," I say. "Besides, he said he doesn't like virgins."
Lisbeth's eyes grow wide. "He said that?"
I shrug and lift my mug to my lips. "Not that I care. Why, is it important?"
"Hmm." Lisbeth leans her head on one arm. "A lot of men actually prefer virgins. But there are also plenty who don't like them. Maybe it's because sleeping with a virgin entails more responsibility, and you know how men are when it comes to responsibilities. Or maybe they just think the sex is better with an experienced woman."
Sex? I blush. How did we even get to talking about that?
I wave my hand. "You know what? Let's not talk about it anymore."
"Hey." Lisbeth reaches for my hand. "It doesn't matter. You've just got to be confident, alright?"
I take a sip of coffee. "Who cares if I'm not his type? He's definitely not my type, either. You know my type right?"
"I know. I know." Lisbeth drinks from her own mug. "Someone sickly sweet, like Josh."
I frown. "Josh would never tease me."
"Isn't that what he's been doing all these years?"
"No. I've just been hopelessly hoping all on my own. He hasn't done anything to lead me on."
&nbs
p; Lisbeth sighs. "Boring."
"That's because he's a good guy," I point out. "He's loyal to his girlfriend."
"So you think if he didn't have a girlfriend, the two of you would be a couple by now?"
"Of course," I answer without hesitation.
"Well, that's confidence."
I say nothing. I finish the rest of my coffee in silence. My thoughts wander over to Josh.
I sure hope he shows up tonight.
~
"Josh, it's really great to have you back!" I end up giving Josh a hug instead of a high five after our show. "I knew it. The band really isn't the same without you."
"Of course not," Kay says. "It was different when Steff played." She sighs. "Are you sure he doesn't want to play with us anymore?"
"Kay," I scold her.
"Just kidding." She waves her hand. "I'm sure you want him all to yourself."
My eyes widen. "That's not-"
"I heard he was good," Josh interrupts.
"Yeah." I touch my neck. "But so are you. And I think you're a better fit for the band. We all play better with you."
"Thanks." He smiles and my heart flutters. "I think I play better with you, too. There's no one I'd rather play the guitar with."
My heart nearly stops.
He glances at Kay and the rest. "I'll surely miss the band."
My chest aches.
I'll miss you.
"Well, we just have to make the most of our final months," I say out loud. "And you have to be with us until the end."
"You're right," Josh agrees. "Sorry I wasn't here the other night."
I shake my head. "So, how's-?"
"Josh!"
I turn my head to see a woman with short, dark brown hair wearing a long sleeved yellow shirt and denim overalls walking towards us.
Even though I've never met her, I immediately guess who she is-and the fact that she goes straight to Josh to wrap an arm around his waist and kiss his cheek confirms it.
Marianne.
"You were great," she tells Josh. "I missed a lot of it, including the last part, because of all those trips to the bathroom, but hey, you were great."
"Are you okay?"
The concern on Josh's face as he looks at her makes my chest ache all the more.
"Yeah. I haven't thrown up once."
Finally, Marianne turns to me. "Hi there. I'm Marianne."
"Jess," I introduce myself.
She nods as she shakes my hand. "I see."
My eyebrows arch slightly. What's that supposed to mean?
"Hey, Josh," Riley calls. "Wanna go for a smoke?"