by Hughes, Maya
The strong icy blast of air hit me the second the door opened, nearly blowing me back into the stairwell. Shoving my glove-covered hands into my pockets, I danced in place as our taxi pulled up.
LJ opened the door, and Marisa and I slid inside first. Then the cab pulled away from the curb and joined the rest of the Thursday night traffic.
The phantom buzzes from my phone had me checking in my bag a couple times on the drive over. Stop checking. Do not text him. We pulled up in front of the house, AKA the Brothel. The name was an unfortunate holdover from when the place had been a frat house, but on this night it seemed to live up to the reputation.
The front of the house was barely visible from the street. People swarmed the porch and steps leading up to the house. Near-freezing temperatures didn’t mean much when people were lit up.
Thumping music from the rows of houses along the street vibrated the walls as college students streamed in and out. Laughter, whistles, and shouting filled the air.
“Ladies.” LJ climbed out and held the door open.
People on the steps made way as LJ climbed up, a perk of being a member of the most successful football team in the past ten years. Sweat, cheap beer, and way too much body spray hit us the second we crossed the threshold. We wove our way through the crush of a hundred partygoers, and LJ’s party wake did not extend to us. The heat of their bodies turned the house into a sauna. LJ high-fived guys along the way, and appreciative glances came from all directions. Heads turned as Marisa and I walked through the living room, and I thought maybe the party was a good idea after all, at least for an ego boost.
He whipped around when we got to the kitchen. “Do you guys want some drinks?”
“No, we came here for enthralling conversation.” Marisa pushed at his shoulder and smirked. “Hell yeah, we want some drinks.”
“Be right back,” he shouted over the volume of the party, which was increasing by the minute.
“It’s a million degrees in here.” Sweat rolled down my back. That was the bitch of winter parties: dress for the sauna and hope you didn’t catch hypothermia when you went outside, or dress for the weather and die of dehydration inside. I fanned myself while we looked for a good place to stand and people watch. LJ came back with the drinks and disappeared again.
The first sip tasted like pure booze. If it had been rubbing alcohol, it wouldn’t have surprised me.
“Jesus, are they making this themselves in the bathtub?” I coughed into my hand.
“Probably.” She winced and took another sip. “Do I still have my eyebrows?”
I laughed and choked down another gulp. We danced along to the music, singing the lyrics at the top of our lungs, and our voices could actually be heard over the pounding music.
Marisa leaned over and shouted into my ear. “I told you this was a good idea.”
We danced together and drifted around the party, my body buzzing with the warm, fuzzy feeling the booze delivered. With each drink, the heat on my neck and cheeks increased, but I hadn’t been out in so long. I thought I better make the most of it before Colm came back and sent me off to some isolation chamber with only a toilet, sink, and my textbooks.
LJ’s roommates stopped by for hugs before being torn away by the crowd. Damn, they were hot—for football players. My tastes tended to fall more toward the hockey variety. Marisa introduced me to Seph, short for Persephone, who was dating one of LJ’s teammates and disappeared upstairs with him within seconds. Somebody was getting some.
A new drink was never far off with LJ taking care of us. Tugging the front of my dress away from my super sweaty body, I motioned to the bathroom. Marisa looped her arm through mine, and we wove our way to the stairs.
Standing at the bottom of the steps, I grabbed the railing. The woozy picture in front of me knocked me over into Marisa.
“Are you okay?” She steadied me.
“I’m fine, just feeling a little dizzy.” The steps multiplied with each lift of my foot. Who the hell designed these stairs?
She steadied me as we made it to the top. “We’ve been going drink for drink so far, and I’m fine. When’s the last time you ate?”
I ran through my schedule for the day. “Breakfast?”
“As in this morning?” Nodding, I braced my hand on the banister as she spoke. “Shit! You’re totally tanked, aren’t you?”
Leaning against the wall in the bathroom line, I laughed at the look of concern on her face. “I’m not tanked, you’re tanked.” I ran my fingers over her lips, a giggling fit seconds from overtaking me.
Her hand shot out as the floor seemed to be rushing up to meet me. Hello, floor. Marisa leaned her shoulder into me and pushed me back against the wall. Nice to almost meet you, Mr. Floor. Marisa and I inched forward in the bathroom line.
“Damn it, I thought I had a granola bar or something in here.” She rummaged around in the purse slung over her shoulder.
The bathroom door opened, and the person in front of me darted inside. My phone lit up in my hand. I danced from foot to foot. There was the slightest chance I’d had too many drinks. Was it four or five? I stared down at the screen, and my breath caught in my throat.
Ford: How are you?
I fumbled the phone, nearly dropping it on the floor. Turning away from Marisa, I tapped out my reply.
Me: Feeling awesome! How are you?
Ford: Awesome huh?
Me: Totally. I feel amazing. So good. Out with my roommate.
Ford: Oh, I’ll let you go then
Me: Wait! How are you? Out partying? Picking up some bunnies?
I laughed at my own joke.
Ford: Back in my apartment. Crazy traffic. Want to get something to eat tomorrow?
Someone came out of the bathroom, and I ducked inside, closing the door in Marisa’s concerned face. Tapping on his name on my screen, I held it up to my face. I tried to steady my body as the floor dipped. They need to get this floor fixed—it isn’t level. I held on to the sink.
“Hey, Ford!” The words came out way louder than I meant them to.
“Hey, Liv. Sounds like you’re having fun.”
“I’m having a wonderful, responsible time out with friends.” I smacked my lips together.
“And getting drunk off your ass.”
“Not even a little bit.” I closed the lid on the toilet and sat, but the damn thing moved when I wasn’t looking and I ended up on the bathroom floor. I didn’t even want to think about the last time it had been cleaned.
He chuckled, and that deep laughter did something to me. The warm, tingling feeling spreading throughout my body traveled a little lower.
I pushed myself up off the floor. “You should come to the party!” Getting all sweaty pressed up against Ford sounded like the perfect way to end the night. I’d already made enough bad decisions—why not add another and stop his little let’s-be-friends act dead in its tracks? I couldn’t deal with being friends with Ford. It was better if we stayed away, but he was the flame and I was the moth, flapping my wings as hard as I could. We were caught in each other’s orbit and unable to escape our gravitational pull.
“To a college party?” The smile in his voice made me smile wider. “I’m not going to be that guy.” He laughed.
Someone knocked on the door. “I’ll be out in a second. What guy?”
“The old guy at a college party.”
“You’re not old.”
“Anyone in college would think so.”
“I don’t think so.” There was a louder knock on the door.
“I’ll be right there.” I tripped over the bathroom mat and nearly face-planted on the floor. My phone slipped out of my hand and clattered onto the black-and-white tiles.
“Are you okay?” His voice blared out of the speaker.
I picked it up. “I’m fine. Just tripped.”
“Send me your location.”
“It’s fine, Ford. I’ll go dance and drown my worries in some more booze. You don’t have to come.
Forget I asked. I’m sure you’ve got other things to do.”
“No, I don’t. Send me the address.”
After accidentally snapping a couple of pictures of myself, I tapped the button to share my current location.
“I’ve got it. Do not go anywhere and don’t drink anything other than water until I get there.”
“Yes, sir.” I saluted the air. Quickly using the toilet, then washing my hands, I tugged the door open and wrapped my arms around Marisa. “He’s coming.”
She crinkled her eyebrows. “Who’s coming?”
“Ford.” My mouth had never been dryer. It was like I’d been eating dryer lint all night.
“You called him?”
“He texted me first. I need to get some water.”
She wrapped her hands around my arms and stared into my eyes. “I’m going to the bathroom. Do not move from this spot until I get back.”
I danced to the music from downstairs, which was vibrating the floor, while she disappeared inside. Maybe Ford would have a couple of drinks and loosen up a bit. Maybe I’d get a repeat of the kiss from Declan and Mak’s wedding and then Ford would reject me again. That would be fun. Maybe my stomach should stop churning like this.
Marisa popped out of the bathroom door. The light from inside it nearly blinded me, and I did my best vampire impersonation.
“We should get out of here. I’m getting you some water, and I’ll take you home.”
“No way—Ford is coming.” I sat on the steps, splintered wood poking the backs of my thighs.
“Even more reason to bail. If he sees you trashed like this, your brother will be on the first plane back here.”
“Ford won’t narc on me. He said he’s my friend now.” I folded my arms over my chest.
“I’m going to go get you some water. Stay right here. Don’t try to walk down these steps on your own.”
People stumbled and fell around my spot on the staircase; then Marisa reappeared with a bottle of water. She held it out to me, and I gulped it down, dripping water all over my chest.
“Let’s get you downstairs.” She grabbed my arm and helped me stand; then we made our way down the winding steps. Were they winding before? The house had gotten more packed, if that were even possible. I missed the last step and stumbled as the door opened. Framed by the doorway was the man of the hour.
“Ford! You—” The blackness rushed up so quickly I hoped it didn’t hurt when I kissed the floor.
9
Ford
The cab pulled up to the curb, and it was definitely a college party. The only way it could have been more of one is if everyone were wearing togas, but they didn’t go with late February weather so much. A few heads turned as I walked up to the house. Some kids ran off, probably thinking I was a cop or something.
A wall of cheap beer smell and heat slammed into me as I stepped inside, followed by a familiar voice. “Ford! You—”
That was the only warning I got before Liv’s body hurtled toward me and the floor. I grabbed her, shoving my hands under her arms and cradling her against my chest. Lifting her up, I checked her face. Her cheeks were flushed, and she was sweaty. Her eyes fluttered open.
“Hi, Ford.” Her friend, who’d tried to grab her before she fell, made it down the last step and greeted me.
“Hi, Ford,” Liv parroted, running her hand along my chest.
“How much has she had to drink?” I looked over her shoulder to her friend.
“Four?”
Liv held her liquor way better than that. “Only four? Did someone put something in her drink?” I’d kick the ass of every guy in there if I needed to.
“No, she just hasn’t eaten anything since this morning. She’d been studying at her desk all day. I didn’t realize she hadn’t eaten anything or I’d have made something for her before we left.” She bit her bottom lip, her eyebrows furrowed with worry. “I’m Marisa.” She held out her hand, so I shifted Liv and shook it.
A few heads turned in our direction. I couldn’t tell if it was because of super-drunk Liv or me, but I didn’t want to stick around to find out.
“I’m totally fine; put me down.” Liv shoved against my chest.
My lips pressed together in a grim line, and I set her down. Her first step turned into a wobble, which then became a stumble, and back into my arms she went.
“Let me take her home.” Marisa craned her neck around the party.
“There’s no way you’ll be able to get her home like this.” Liv was deadweight, a completely floppy noodle. “I can take her to my place. Colm will freak if he knows I saw her like this and didn’t take care of her.”
Marisa nibbled on her thumb, probably weighing the guilt factor of trying to muscle Liv home on her own or letting me take her.
“Give me your number, and I’ll text you when we’re home safely. I don’t want you to worry. My phone’s in my back pocket.” I told her the pass code.
She slipped it out and unlocked it. As she put her number in, some of her tension ebbed away.
“Can you order a taxi while you’ve got that?” I gave her my address and let her order the cab.
“It’ll be here in two minutes.”
The words hockey, goalie, and a few more terms came from the crowd. Phones came out, and I wished I had a hat on or something.
“I’ll take her out there.” Cradling her against my chest, I lifted her off her feet.
“I’ll come too—don’t want the cab driver thinking you’re picking up passed-out women at college parties.”
“Good point.”
The cab arrived, and I hurried Liv inside.
Marisa knocked on the window. “Don’t forget to message me.”
“I won’t,” I shouted through the glass.
She stepped back from the car and waved to us as we pulled away.
Liv’s head rested against the back of the seat with her eyes closed. I itched to reach for my phone to call Colm. He’d want to know, but I’d made the promise to Liv.
“How are you feeling?” I put my hand on the back of her sweaty, heated neck. She was going to be hurting in the morning.
“I feel awesome.” Her head lolled to the side, and her eyes widened, recognition lighting up her face. “Ford, you came!”
So we’re dealing with a Dory Drunk tonight. The corner of my mouth lifted. “I told you I would.”
“You’ve been avoiding me for so long, I figured it was all lies, figured you’d never want to speak to me again.”
Guilt hammered at my gut. “The way that night went down is something I’ve always regretted, Liv.”
She lifted her head from the back of the seat. “I’m drunk off my ass, and even I know a bad lie when I hear one.”
Streetlights flooded the car in a steady rhythm, each pass showing off her profile, the delicate curve of her nose, the length of her neck, the way she filled out that dress.
Shaking my head, I stared out the window. Ogling Liv while she was drunk felt so damn wrong, not that ogling her while she was sober felt any better. The nagging voice in the back of my head telling me to stay the hell away was getting drowned out a little more each day.
A soft, warm hand slid across my thigh and I jumped. Turning back to Liv, I shot back against the door as she leaned in closer. Her hand inched higher up my leg, and the rush of blood straight to my dick was a disaster waiting to happen.
“I’m glad you came tonight.”
“I’m glad I did too. There’s no way Marisa would have gotten you home.” I put my hand over hers and stopped her steady upward progress.
“That’s not why.” Her breasts pressed against my arm.
“Liv, you’re drunk. You don’t know what you’re doing right now.”
“I know exactly what I’m doing.” She licked her lips and inched even closer.
My head was wedged between the back of the seat and the window. Taking advantage of a drunk Liv wasn’t going to happen.
“I’m kissing you,” she s
aid with a small smile.
“Let’s talk about this in the morning.” If I’d gotten any farther away, I’d have been running along beside the car.
“Enough talk.”
“Liv—” My words were cut off by her lips landing on mine. The sweet taste of rum and Coke danced on her tongue, and she smelled so good, even through the college-party funk that clung to both of us. I threaded my fingers through her hair. Our lips mashed together. Her hungry tug on my lips sent a shot down my spine, and I wanted to rip the dress off her body.
Her sleepy moan snapped me back to my senses. She was drunk off her ass. She didn’t know what the hell she was doing, and I was not taking advantage of that.
I jerked my head away, slamming it hard against the glass.
“See, I told you—terrible liar. You don’t want me.” Even through the drunkenness, the sadness-laced words sliced at me. “It’s okay, though. I won’t make you say it again.” Her head dropped onto my shoulder. She toyed with the buttons on my shirt before her hand stilled against my chest.
Craning my neck, I looked down at her and brushed the hair off her face. A steady snore came from her mouth.
“You don’t know how much it kills me. There’s no one else I want in the world, but I can’t have you,” she mumbled, and I wrapped my arm around her shoulder. Her body pressed even tighter against mine as she burrowed into my side.
The taxi pulled up in front of my apartment, and I lifted her out, cradling her in my arms. With any luck she wouldn’t remember any of this, but I sure as hell would.
Shifting her weight, I opened my apartment door and kicked it closed. I flicked on a couple lights, and she picked up her head from my shoulder.
“Taking me back to your place—this should be fun.” Her drunk, unfocused gaze tried to lock onto mine like she’d forgotten what was said in the car. “I don’t feel so good.”
She clutched her hands to her stomach, and that was all the warning I got before receiving a baptism of sorts. Doing my best to get us cleaned up, I kept my eyes averted as I peeled the dress off her body.
Her grumbles reassured me as I tucked her into bed after making her drink a couple glasses of water. I replied to her roommate’s text and let her know Liv was sleeping it off safely at my place.
