“Then why didn’t you make love to me? I asked you to show me that you love me.”
“Not making love to you tonight is the best way for me to show you, by taking things slow. That’s what you deserve, to be respected.”
“What do you call what we’ve been doing for years, Kane?”
“Oakley, I’ve never been like this with anyone, I don’t even know how to make love. I’m learning this as I go.”
She faces me. “Then fuck me, Kane,” she says.
Tilting my head back to see her better, I say, “No, Oakley, it’s not going to be that way with you. I can’t be that way to you.”
16
Oakley
He doesn’t want to fuck me? Shit, I can’t even throw myself at someone right, not even when I come straight out and ask for sex! What is so wrong with me? I thought Kane wanted me. I thought he loved me. But I get it now; he doesn’t want me because if he did we would be screwing right now.
I can’t stay here, not after this. I sit up, pulling out of Kane’s arms, a place I used to feel safe. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I look around for my clothes.
“What are you doing, Oakley?”
“Kane, I threw myself at you, I even straight up asked you for sex. And what did you do… You turned me down! I have never heard of a guy turning down sex with someone they say they want. What do I have to do…beg?” I slip my t-shirt over my head. Where did my bra go when I tossed it? I search the floor.
“How can you even say that?”
“I throw myself at you, I come right out and ask you for sex, and you don’t take it. Guys don’t turn down sex. What, are you wanting me to beg you?” I’m so freaking disgusted with myself. Looking down as I shake my head, fighting back the tears that want to fall, “If that is what you want, you can forget it, I won’t beg. I’m sure there’s somebody out there who wants me even if it is only for sex. You say you want me, but obviously you don’t or we would be doing something decidedly different. So, I’m outta here!” I pull sleep pants on and grab my bag.
Kane is still sitting in bed, just sitting there.
His eyebrows are drawn together and he’s merely staring at me. He opens his mouth to say something but stops, putting his hand over his mouth. He can’t think of anything to say because I’m right, and he knows it.
“I love you and I just don’t want to rush the physical aspect of this relationship. There is plenty of time for all that stuff later. You’re the only person besides my Mimi that I care anything about. So, please come back to bed and be my little spoon.”
He has to be out of his mind crazy if he thinks for one second that what he said has changed my mind. Does he not realize that I drew a line in the sand between friend zone and couple zone and he didn’t step over it? If he thinks I’m stepping back into the friend zone…I shake my head. “Bye, Kane.” I walk out of his room and I don’t look back.
Well, great…after my dramatic exit I realize I’m stuck. Shit, it’s storming outside and since Kane brought us here, I don’t have my car. Now what am I going to do? I dig in my purse to find my phone and call a cab.
The dispatcher said the cab would take about an hour to arrive, but I can’t be in this house another minute so I wait out back on Kane’s fully furnished enclosed patio.
As I watch the rain falling, I feel the pull to be out in it, the pull to be made fresh and clean like the trees are after a storm. I set my purse down and walk into the cleansing rain. I let the rain wash away the hurt from Kane’s rejection, let it wash away the fear of being alone. There is no way to tell if tears are running down my face or if it is just the rain as I stand arms out, face lifted to the sky.
“Aaaaahhhhh!” I scream at the sky and feel a cathartic release. So, I do it again. I yell to the exploding sky, “I don’t care, do you hear me?” I’m just like this storm. The pressure that’s been building up has to be released. “Drench me! Please, wash it all away,” I choke on my sobs. “I’m sick of worrying, tired of carrying around the hurt—take it. Take it!” I fall down to my knees onto the cobblestone.
The wind hisses and I can hear the faint crack of thunder. My hair and clothes are stuck to me. I am drenched. Strong arms wrap around me from behind.
“I’m here, baby. Give me your pain. You don’t have to carry around the hurt anymore,” Kane gently rocks me as we sit in his courtyard during the height of the storm then he gathers me into his arms and moves to a lounger just behind us. He sits, cradling me in his arms. “Don’t leave me like that again, Oakley. I love you and I refuse to let you walk out of my life.” He rolls us over so that he is leaning over me. His body is shaking as his breath heaves, and I watch him. My eyes trace the beads of water as they run down his hard pecs to the band of his underwear, peeking out from the top of his jeans. I can see his erection outlined perfectly in the wet denim.
“Then love me, Kane. Right here, right now. Show me that you see me as a woman and not as a little girl. I need to know that I’m more than your friend,” I cry, laying my hand over my heart.
“You’re my world, my moon, and stars. My thunder and lightning. You’re my rain, Oakley. Without you, I can’t live.” Kane removes my shirt. “If you love me like I love you, then stay. There’s not one single reason for you to leave, but I’ll give you a reason to stay.”
He pushes me back on the lounger and pulls off my pants. His eyes are hazy in the moonlight. “You’re more beautiful than I ever imagined,” he says with love in his eyes. He runs his hands over my hips, watching me, taking in my body. Kane dips his head to my stomach and kisses my navel. Pushing my legs apart, he traces my folds with his hand.
I raise my hips, seeking more, needing his touch. I want more, so much more. My body’s tingling with need.
He places his arm across my hips to keep me still, while moving his head further south.
His breath feels so hot, and all my senses are on edge. He barely caresses the inside of my thigh. Touch me. I’m begging you. My pulse quickens in anticipation of what I hope is coming next. He runs his finger up my slit.
“You’re so wet, you want me, don’t you?”
“Yes!” I exhale in a strained voice, closing my eyes.
“What do you want me to do, Oakley? Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you.”
He rubs my entrance, back and forth, making my breath catch.
“Ah, I want…I want you to taste me again.” I move my hands down and grip his hair.
“Like this?” He flicks his tongue where his fingers were, caressing me.
“Yes… yes.”
“Do you like this, Oakley? Does it feel good?” He pushes his tongue inside, touching and tasting me.
“Umm-humm, yeah.” How could he even think I wouldn’t? His touch is sending bolts of electricity to my toes. “Don’t stop, please.”
“If I don’t stop,” he mumbles, sending vibrations over the sensitive spot, “you’ll never know what it feels like when I suck on your clit.” His finger teasingly traces over that throbbing little bead, before sucking it into his mouth and flicking his tongue over it.
Oh, good heavens, that’s good “I like…I like that, too.” I’m trying to catch my breath.
“Or you’d never know how it feels to combine these two things,” he whispers, sliding his finger inside me while he continues to suck.
My body takes to spontaneous lifting off the lounger. It has a mind of its own. While my ass is in the air, he takes it in both of his hands, pulling me into his face. He’s eating me like I’m his last meal. With each lick, I feel this sensation at the base of my spine, almost like a prickling. Just when I think I’m about to spontaneously combust, he stops.
“No, don’t stop. Please I need…I need…”
He just chuckles wickedly as he stands, which allows me to remove his jeans and boxers, and I see his penis for the first time. I’ve felt it pressing into my back while he was holding me in bed. I knew he was big, but he’s much more massive than I’d imagined. I
reach for his hand and tug him to me.
“We shouldn’t be doing this.”
I open my mouth to object and he holds up a finger.
“Shush, I’m not finished. As I was saying, not out here in the open.” He shakes his head, causing water droplets to fall from his glistening skin to mine. “You deserve so much better; I want to this make special for you. We should at least move under the patio, out of this rain.”
“I want this. I want you right here right now outside in the open. If you haven’t figured it out yet… You are all that I want, all that I desire. You’re exactly what I deserve, Kane. You’re so much more than you give yourself credit. You mean so much to me.”
He slams his mouth down on mine and words fail us both. He slips a finger inside me with a gentleness that surprises me. Slowly, he adds another finger; he’s stretching me. He strokes me, curling his fingers, pressing up, touching a spot inside that makes me automatically lift my hips.
“Baby, we need to go inside. I didn’t bring a condom out here and this’ll be easier for you if we use lube.” Kane kisses down my neck.
No way we’re stopping this now. “I have both in my purse, Kane.” Thank you Sandy for insisting that I bring those.
The sight of Kane’s cock bobbing as he walks over to my purse almost makes me giggle. I can’t believe this is really about to happen.
On his way back to me, he rips open the condom package with his teeth. When he reaches me, he positions the condom on the head of his cock.
“Wait.” I lick the rain from my lips. “Can I do that for you?”
“Try to relax, baby, or this will hurt more with this being your first time.”
“Okay,” I say breathily, and I touch his penis for the first time. I use my fingertips to push the condom down his shaft. When I run them back up to the tip, Kane lets out a tiny moan.
“Lay back, baby,” Kane says. He kisses my collarbone before moving to my breast. His hand cups my breast just before he licks the tip.
I reach down between us and find him hot and throbbing then guide his penis to my vagina. I want him now and push my hips up, trying to get penetration.
He eases his tip in just a bit. “Are you okay?” He looks at me so tenderly, his eyes searching mine.
I nod.
He moves a little more, going a little deeper. He waits for a moment and pulls back slightly, before he sinks himself a little further inside my core. He pulls back and looks me in the eye. “You ready?”
I nod. It doesn’t hurt as much as I had imagined because he’s going so slow.
Kane leans down and starts kissing me before he thrusts forward, breaking my hymen. He immediately stills inside me but keeps kissing me through the pain. He moves a hand in between our bodies and starts rubbing my clit, allowing my body to relax out of the pain back into pleasure. He leans back, looking down into my face. “You good? You want to continue?”
I give him a little nod. I’m okay because he’s going so slow.
Kane goes a tiny bit further each time until he pushes in so far that I feel like my internal organs are being moved. I hiss a little in pain, and he goes completely still. The pressure eases up as I get accustomed to him being inside me then I nod for him to start moving again.
He moves in and out slowly and when it’s beginning to feel better I wiggle around under him. I want more, faster. I move my butt off the lounger, meeting him every time he thrusts deeper inside me. “Ah.” This is sex. This is making love. This is fantastic.
“Babe, I don’t want to hurt you. You’re making me lose control.” He pulls completely out of me. “Get on top of me so you control the pace.”
We switch places and I straddle his pelvis. The rain has almost stopped but we are soaked. I don’t think he has ever looked better than he does right now, with his hair plastered to his head and his eyes concentrated on me.
Kane holds onto my hips, helping me slip onto his cock. I move down, taking him all the way inside me. There's more pressure than pain this time, and Kane holds on to me as I start to move. I place my hands on his chest to center myself as I rock back and forth.
We find a rhythm that I’m comfortable with and I’m able to move at my own pace. “I love you, Kane.” I tell him. His eyes haven’t left mine for even a moment.
“I love you, too. You are mine, Oakley. There’s not any turning back now. I’m yours and you’re mine, I’m not ever letting you go, baby.”
“I’m not going anywhere because this is where I’ve always wanted to be, Kane.” I lean forward to kiss him, just as thunder cracks. I freaking love thunderstorms. I love the rain and I love Kane making love to me in the rain. He’s all I’ve ever wanted my whole life. Now, he’s finally mine. The tingling is back and I hope that he will come when I do. My orgasm is approaching fast and this will be my first one with anything other than my fingers or BOB. It means so much to me that this time is with Kane because I love him and have wanted him to be my first for a long time. My movements become more erratic the closer I get. Kane reaches between us and rubs my clit, which sends me over into an orgasm. I collapse onto his chest. Kane wraps his arms around me then thrusts into my core and spasms twice before he finds his release. We lay here in each other’s arms, breathing hard.
Kane searches my eyes. “Are you okay?”
“I’m better than okay, Kane.”
Kane carries me inside when I begin to shiver. He takes us to the bathroom and turns on the shower. Steam fills the room and the warm water heats up our bodies, while I explore every delicious inch of Kane. I run my hands down his abs, feeling the ripples between each one. I was crazy to think that his smirky smile was sexier than his washboard abs. I love watching the water run down his body. Ummm. I am loving every minute of this shower. I want to spend time savoring each and every ripple with my tongue.
“Oh, baby. You don’t know what you do to me.” Kane hisses out.
“What does this do for you? Does it send the same electric vibe straight down to your toes, too?” I walk around him, letting my fingers give feather-light touches. I stop to admire his ass. Damn, no wonder he looks so good in jeans. His ass looks like it was chiseled by Michelangelo. I reach down and give it a light squeeze. I can’t resist touching him. We’re finally together, just like I’ve wanted. I make it back around to his front and drop to my knees. I’m going to show him how much I love him.
“Baby, you don’t have to do that,” Kane says in a throaty whisper.
I stare at his cock. It’s so big. How will I be able to fit that all in my mouth? “I want to, Kane. You did this for me, and I want to make you feel as good as you did me.” I trace my hands along the head and lean in to give it a quick lick.
“Oakley, come back up here, baby. This is hard for me to turn down, but if we try everything tonight, there won’t be anything for us to experience later. It’s too much right now.” Kane reaches for my hand and pulls me up.
“Kane, how can you say it’s too much, how much more intimate can we get?” I stand on my tiptoes to kiss him.
“Oh, we’ve merely scratched the surface, baby. The things I plan to do with you have probably never crossed your mind.”
“I want you to show me.” I wrap my arms around his neck, melding our bodies. I feel his hardness poking me in my lower stomach, and I want him again. Reaching between us, I stroke his cock and it grows even bigger.
“The rest of tonight, sweetheart, I’m going to hold you in my arms. You’re going to be my little spoon.” Kane removes my hand. “Now, hand me the shampoo and I’ll wash your hair.”
Kane’s the sweetest, gentlest person alive. He washes me all over and his fingers in my hair relax me like nothing else. Later, he carries me to bed and just as he promised, sleeps with his arms wrapped around me all night. It is the best night’s sleep I’ve ever had.
17
Kane
Last night with Oakley almost broke me. She only wanted to please me. Other than Mimi, she’s the only person who's ev
er wanted things to be about me. I feel the love in her touches, and I see the love in her eyes. I’m scared out of my mind that I’m going to fuck this up. I’m going to hold on to her and love her as long as I can. I’d fight the devil himself if I have to, but I’m not letting him take her away from me.
“I’d love to stay in bed with you all day, love, but I’ve got a few errands I need to run. Do you want me to drop you off at your dorm or do you want to stay here and wait for me to get back?” We’ve been lying under these covers just talking and fooling around for an hour. Unfortunately, today is my turn to deal with Deb.
“I’ll go with you so we can have a little bit of fun,” Oakley whispers then nips my ear.
“This’s something I have to do alone, sweets, but I’ll hurry and be back as soon as possible.” I don’t want her to meet my mother ever. I don’t want Deb’s poison to hurt Oakley. For all I know, Deb could be gone tomorrow. One call from my sperm donor is all it would take for her to up and leave again. Deb could be gone tomorrow because who knows when or if my sperm donor will call for her to come back on the road with him.
“What could you possibly have to do on a Saturday morning that requires you to be alone? Are you ashamed of me? Is that it, or because I’m so much younger than you?” Oakley sits up, holding the sheet around her naked body.
“No, I’m not ashamed of you in any way. What are you thinking that would possibly make you say that? What I have to do today is deal with an ugly part of my life and no way do I want you tainted by it.” I sit up and pull Oakley in my arms. “I love this place right here,” I kiss her nose. “Oh, this spot, I adore.” I kiss her lips.
“All you’ve done is made me even more curious. Kane, I thought after being together last night, we were in a relationship. That we’d deal with everything we had to face together. I’m sorry if I came to the wrong conclusion about that.” She slaps my hands away. “Quit trying to distract me, Kane.”
“Oakley, please just let me ease you into the storm of my life. There are things you don’t know about me. I promise to tell you, just not today. Why don’t you come get in the shower with me, I want to see soap running down your beautiful body.” I kiss her neck, and lick across her collarbone.
Love Me ~ Through the Storm Page 10
