by T. A. Grey
She straightened. “No need to wait around in suspense then. My answer is no. Now let me leave.”
His big shoulders lifted and sagged as he let out a deep breath. “I can’t let it happen that way. All I ask is that you give me a chance. What if you’re the one?”
She pressed a hand over her stomach to quell the nerves squirming there like snakes in a bucket. “The one what?” The man flattered her, really he did. But this wasn’t how things like this were supposed to happen. Even if, hypothetically, she got with him, then what would she tell her grandkids some day? That her mate practically kidnapped her and locked her up, coercing her into mating with him? That wasn’t how relationships began. Not in her world.
A moment of silence passed. He didn’t say a word and his meaning sank in.
“What if I’m the one…as in your real mate? Not just a woman who can act the part but who can really…” she struggled over the words, “love you? That’s a pretty tall order.” And he already was wondering if she was it. Her cheeks colored at the thought and she was thankful he wouldn’t turn around now.
“The one woman who can stand to look me in the eye. The one who will give it a chance. I need you to get to know me so you can see past my face. Give me a month,” he said in that scratchy voice.
Alicia shook her head at all this. It was crazy. An alpha wanted her to get to know him, to give him a chance to see whether she’d like to mate with him or not. Since Josiah had practically gift wrapped her into his care, Gavin could do about anything with her under the law. He could force her to mate with him, beat her, or any number of horrible things. But he did none of those.
That may give her some reassurance to her safety and well-being in this pack, but still. This is not how things like this happened. At all. He wanted a month with her. For her to really give him a shot to see if they were compatible.
She considered her choices. She could try to escape again but they’d probably increase the guards now that she’d already tried that. Or she could listen to him and give this a shot. All she’d have to do was stick it out here for a month and politely tell him no thanks at the end of it. At the end of a month she’d be free to go. In a way, it’d be like a strange vacation.
“Okay, it’s a deal under one condition,” she said.
His shoulders bunched hard, tension emanating from him. “What’s that?” he asked.
She sucked in a deep breath for what she was about to ask. When she spoke, her words were rushed together. “Show me your face right now in the light. Show me or this ends now.” She held her breath, unsure whether he’d do it or not.
The hat spun around in his hands. With one hand he lifted it and tucked it on his head. It settled perfectly like an old friend. If possible, the tension in his shoulders grew more intense. His coat creaked with it, jeans rustled as he leaned on his other foot.
“I’m afraid I can’t do that,” he said.
Alicia flexed her jaw as she planted her hands on her hips. “And why not? Don’t you think you should just show me so this stupid suspense is over and we can move on? I mean, what do you think’s going to happen when we get to the end of the month? Let’s say, hypothetically, I like you. So you go and show me your face, but I think you’re ugly as sin. Hell, I even vomit when I see it. You think that just because we shared a few conversations in the past few weeks is going to change that?” She was breathing hard when she finished her little rant. Anger had gotten the better of her and when she saw his body stiffen. She instantly regretted her words. She hadn’t just said ‘ugly as sin,’ had she? And she really hadn’t said she might vomit if she saw his face, right?
Fuck.
“Listen, I’m sorry. That came out more harshly than I intended---”
“Don’t,” he said, his voice sharp for the first time. Recoiling, she took an automatic step back as fear leaped in her throat. “Just don’t,” he said, shaking his head. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about. You think I wouldn’t just turn the fuck around if I could and get it over with? Do you know how easy that sounds? But it’s not that easy. I see how everyone looks at me, especially the women. I don’t want you to be like that too.”
“I-I wouldn’t.” She wouldn’t judge him like that. At the thought, she flinched, unsure. She wouldn’t, right? What if it really was terrible like the character in the Hannibal movie who’d had his face skinned off by Doctor Lector? Even she wasn’t so sure in herself.
He laughed, the sound bitter and she winced as guilt reared its ugly head. “Right. Aren’t so sure of yourself, are you now? No, I think we’ll stick to doing things my way, Ms. Clarkson.” He started striding forward, his long-legged steps eating up the distance back to the house.
Ah fuck, now she felt like the worse kind of ass. One that was sinking into a steaming pile of shit.
She followed him, shaking her head. “Listen, I’m sorry. I’m normally not so…mean, but cut me a break will you? I have been sent here and not because I wanted an Oregon vacation.”
He didn’t say anything and the quiet moment gave her eyes a second to roam down over his deerskin jacket to a particular body part she probably shouldn’t stare at. Damn, she thought. He had a nice ass. No, nice didn’t begin to describe it. He had an ass she could hold on to, that filled out his jeans, and that looked hard and firm.
Heat grew in her chest and she flushed as she jerked her gaze away.
“You’re going back upstairs while I go to work. No free rein, and if I were you, I wouldn’t try to escape again.”
Alicia stopped, both feet planting into the ground like roots to a tree. She stared at his retreating back, with her teeth bared and eyes narrowed. The man did not know who he was dealing with. She might be more skilled with needle and thread with a dash of creativity, but when she got pissed off, shit got real.
And she was pissed off. How dare he revoke her newly received privilege.
She stalked after him in hard angry steps that dug into the soft ground and tore chunks of grass out from beneath her shoes. Her elbows jabbed backward, punching the air as she moved faster and faster.
His head cocked the side as he heard her approach. The stupid brim of his hat blocked out his face only giving her the shadows of profile.
She full on ran the last ten feet as a war cry bellowed from her throat. He didn’t duck away as he could have. No, he took the hit. She wasn’t even sure why he did, though she didn’t care. Not one bit. All she knew was this man was the cause of her problems and she was going to let it all out.
She slammed into his back like a flying monkey. Arms and legs crashing into him and curling around him as he fell forward, unable to hold them both up at her momentum. He fell to his knees first, one hand catching the fall before fully crashing to the grass. His hat sailed away and she saw his hair was about two inches longer than she’d originally thought. His hat kept it pressed down.
“What do you think you’re doing?” he asked, breathing hard.
“What does it look like? I’m getting my answer now.”
He kept his face forward much as she’d done when they were across the land. Their roles had quite literally reversed. Only she wasn’t about to get up and back away. Hell fucking no. She was pissed right the fuck off.
“Get off of me, Alicia. Now.” An alpha’s command, said with every bit of power he held.
Yet, she was the one in the dominant position staring at the back of his head.
“No. Now you listen to me, Gavin MacKellen. I’m through playing your games. Turn around and show me your damn face.” She cocked her jaw, mentally digging her feet in. She would not budge on this.
Suddenly, he started laughing. Her stomach tingled. He had a raspy, deep laugh that reminded her a bit of a smoker coughing. It had a nice timber to it, almost melodic.
That’s it. He was not going to sit here and laugh at her.
Snapping, she thrust her hands into his hair, gripping a handful of tresses. She got low, completely straddling his body
and got down to his ear to peer at the side of his face. But he jerked away, burying the cheek into the grass. She quickly changed routes and pulled him the other way but he only turned his head again. Then she caught it—the barest of glimpses. A check covered in jagged scars, pink, puckered flesh. But it vanished so quickly she couldn’t call back the memory.
Tightening her hand in his hair as a warning, she hissed. “Stop that! What are you, a child?”
That laughter came again from deep within his chest, jolting her on his body like she was riding a horse.
“You’re the one straddling me, darlin’. What say you let me up now? Because, Alicia, you’re not going to win this.”
“I’m not going to win this? Fuck that! I am going to win this.”
Changing her grip one more time, she tried to yank his head to the side and force him to show her the side of his face. Only, he moved with the motion, his entire body rolling and throwing her completely off balance.
Then she was being handled. That’s the only way she could describe it. He moved too fast for her brain to even process it until after it was over. Limbs tangled and touch, moved and jerked by his manipulative, quick hands. When it was over, her face was once again in the ground and he was spread out on top of her body.
Only this time, a lick of pleasure swept up inside her. Something was different about it this time. This time his entire body lay against hers, showing her all that heat and muscle. His hips were pressed into her ass and she closed her eyes to focus better. Was he hard or not? She couldn’t really tell.
She panted as her body became aware of his. His hands were fisted in the grass above her shoulders, caging her in. Something about the submissive position called to her softest feminine yearnings, told her to arch her bottom up and rub it against his hips to find if he was hard or not.
His harsh breaths met with hers. She turned her cheek to the side to glance up at him but he simply leaned the other way. Then, a moment later, she felt his face press into her hair, heard him inhale.
“I’ve never known a woman who smelled as good as you do. I don’t know why that is. Do you?”
It was like a coiling ache built in her chest being screwed tighter and tighter making it difficult to even breathe. “No,” was all she could say.
“Neither do I, but sometimes it’s best not to question the beauty of nature. Better to stop and soak it in.”
Those tingles in her belly intensified, slid between her legs. God, she was getting so turned on. “You think I’m beautiful?”
He curled his hand into her hair, much more gently than she’d touched him. “Oh yeah. The best of them all. Something to be seen, breathed in, soaked in. Like the sun or a beautiful sunset. That’s what you are, Alicia Clarkson. And something about all that beauty calls to me. I want it for myself,” he said, his voice getting lower. “I want to know it from the inside out.”
Her heartbeat pounded against her chest, trying to break free. Oh god, she wanted him to kiss her so badly. She needed him, ached inside for something she wasn’t ready to admit yet.
“Gavin,” she said, and she couldn’t stop it. Her body acted on its own and those traitorous hips arched up into him, caressing him. That’s when she gasped. She found him. Her bottom was met by a steely column between his hips. He was hard as a damn rock.
His breath caught at the action, stuttered as he exhaled.
She knew what she wanted then, more than anything else, more than wanting to see his face or to get free and escape. She wanted his kiss. To feel the flames explode between them because she just knew they would.
“Kiss me, Gavin,” she said, panting.
So quickly, he moved. In a flash, he had those strong hands cupping her hips, tightening and stopping her from rubbing her bottom along that column of power.
“Don’t,” he said, his voice cracked and broken. The sound sent a shiver down her spine and it wasn’t in fear.
He buried his face in the back of her hair and it felt like they were lovers, aching for each other after being too long without each other’s touch.
“Please,” she begged, aching for that kiss. That first touch of lips from this strange, intriguing male.
The hand on her hips froze any of her movements, and he lifted away. “No.” He pushed her hips back to the ground.
“What?” The flames of arousal died like throwing water on a campfire. The licks of them tried to stay alive but anger started killing them.
“I said no.”
Her mouth flopped open and closed as humiliation and shame mixed nastily with the anger. “You’re telling me no? After asking me to mate with you, and then I…” she couldn’t bring herself to say she wanted his touch, not now. “And you won’t even give me this? Fine, get the hell off of me.”
“Alicia, it shouldn’t be like this---”
“You know what,” she interrupted, “I’m real sick of you telling me how things should and shouldn’t be. Now get the hell off me, Gavin MacKellen. Now. Before I scream an avalanche down on us.”
His heavy weight lifted off her and when sat up, she saw him marching back to the house, without a word to her.
Shame burned her cheeks, made her teeth grind until she threatened to sand down her molars. It wasn’t fair, she thought, standing. This was how he treated her? She finally had a moment of stupidity where she actually felt something intense and wild between them and he couldn’t even kiss her.
Her jaw gliding back and forth, she marched up the house and threw open the front door. She hadn’t been sure what she’d find there, but Kaity, Will, and a man whose manila boots she recognized wasn’t it.
Pissed, she squared her shoulders. “You’re the one who kicked the door down upstairs.”
The man looked mean. He had ‘pissed-the-fuck-off’ stamped all over his face and body. He stood with big legs spread, arms crossed across a broad, burly chest and his lips pulled down into a grimace, his golden brown eyes flat.
“How’d you guess?” he asked, not actually sounding interested in the least.
She nodded to his boots. “Recognized the shoes.”
He lifted a brow and everything grew quiet. Kaity cast quick glances at her which were both angry and hurt. Will glared at her, also pissed off. Gavin was nowhere to be seen.
So what the hell was she supposed to do now?
“I’m going to need my work supplies sent up here. I can’t stay here for a month and not work. I have a job to do. If you could take care of that, I’d appreciate it. Can one of you take care of that?”
“Who the hell do you think you are giving us orders?” the big man asked.
“Jo, can it. He said he’s sending the rest of the girls home. This could be his mate one day,” Kaity said.
So the big guy was named Jo. He didn’t look like a Jo. He looked like a Mingus or Vinnie or Victor or some other over the top, big name. Not a Jo. Such a short name didn’t do justice to the guy who had short-cropped hair, tattooed sleeves along both arms that disappeared under his black tee.
The sound of a truck rumbled up outside. Kaity and Will sidled past her to get out the front door but Jo stayed behind, glaring at her like he was envisioning hammering nails into her head. She glared back because it wasn’t like she’d caused him that much grief.
And where had Gavin gone? She’d heard him enter the house. Was he upstairs, and if so, what was he doing? Hell, why do you care, she questioned herself. I really don’t, she assured herself.
Jo strode forward, his boots landing like thunderclaps on the floor. “Listen here, Alicia Clarkson. My cuz deserves a solid woman. A woman who will treat him like a fuckin’ king for once. If you’re not her, then get the hell out of here now.”
She took a few things out of what he said. One, he and Gavin were cousins. Two, apparently women treated Gavin like shit. And three, he was under the wrong misconception about her position in the pack.
“Listen, I’ve asked to go home, I’ve begged to go home, and I just tried to escape
. Do you really think that if not for Gavin keeping me here, I wouldn’t be gone?”
The frown around his lips deepened as her words sunk in. She almost smirked because she knew she was right and now he knew it too.
He leaned down, his face getting too close to be comfortable. That’s when she caught a flash of metal hanging in his ears. “No, you listen to me, little girl.” She bristled at the ‘little’ even if it was true. “Gavin deserves a fuckin’ queen. A woman who will bow down every morning and suck his dick like it’s her job, because it fuckin’ is. He deserves a good woman’s respect and admiration. If you don’t have that for him, then don’t string him along. You got that?”
Anger made her flush. At least that’s what she told herself. It couldn’t be his crude words or the erotic images they painted in her mind. “That’s some of the most misogynistic crap I’ve ever heard. Where are you going after this? Off to your women-beating club to clap the other guys on the back for smacking their mates real good?” Whoa. She was breathing hard, not real sure where all that came from. All she knew was the man made her mad with his archaic bullshit.
His eyes widened. Then he leaned a few inches closer until she could feel his breath blow across her. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
With that, he opened the front door and slammed it as he left. She winced as the loud clap of wood reverberated in her eardrums like a ping pong ball.
She heard voices outside. Curiosity got the best of her and she went to a window in the living room and pulled back a white gauzy curtain to see outside. Another man had pulled up in a truck.
Kaity rushed forward and the man caught her in his arms. She broke down into sobs. “I just heard about Emma. Oh, Hart, I can’t believe it. Who could have killed her?” She choked on her words, the sounds muffled as she buried her face in his chest. Alicia felt a tingle in her nose and sniffled.
The man named Hart had to be a cousin or brother because he looked very much like Gavin in the physical sense. Tall, big, and strong. Hart wasn’t quite as tall though and he looked thicker around the chest, but didn’t have the tall body and sinewy muscle like Gavin. He had darker hair than the rest of them but the same good looking face and blue eyes. Made her wonder if this is what Gavin looked like—at least in some way.
