by Jaycee Ford
While he was immersed in my chest, I asked, “Condom?”
He pulled his face away from my chest as he shoved his hand inside of his jeans that were wrapped around his ankles and pulled out the foil wrapper. I tore off the side with my teeth and slowly sheathed him as he moaned with my touch. I pushed my panties aside to allow full access and brought myself down on him. He grunted with a deep thrust into me, stealing my breath away. His tip touched places that had never been touched before. My body jerked with every plunge. I gasped for breath and tore into his back, scratching for more. As I finally adjusted to his size, my tongue darted inside of his mouth. I held his head with security as we kissed and panted. Our breath intertwined.
The walls of my core throbbed, clenching with ache and need. An inner explosion began to erupt from the pit of my stomach, pulsing down. My head rolled back.
“Tom…”
He squeezed my hips tight, thrusting deep and once again hitting that spot that had never been reached before.
“Come, darlin’.”
One final hard thrust and I hit my peak, flying into ecstasy. I rode through my screams of pleasure as Tom shook.
“I love you, Jordan. Oh God, I love you.”
He pulsed into me and I clenched around him, milking every last throb. I slumped over him as he buried his head in the crook of my neck. As we both willed our erratic breath to calm down, I sat back and looked into his eyes. It came back to me what he had said. He said he loved me. I tensed within his arms.
“Tom…”
“Jordan, don’t say anything. I’m not going to say that I didn’t mean it, but I don’t want you saying anything either way. Just let us be in this moment right now.”
He showed more love in his eyes than I had ever seen from anyone before. I believed him and his words of love. I just didn’t know if I was deserving of it. I reciprocated with tender kisses across his jaw while still remaining connected. Regardless of the unexpected announcement, this was undoubtedly the most perfect night of my life.
• • •
Tom, you dumb fuck. I couldn’t believe I had told her I loved her. I do, but I thought for sure that would scare her away. I didn’t mean to say it already, but like hell I was going to take it back. I couldn’t scare her, though. I needed her like I needed air to breathe. How was this possible? It had only been a week. This was not some blind infatuation. I knew my heart. Even if she never did love me back, I would never regret telling her and never regret being with her.
I needed to figure out what had happened. I needed to figure out what he did to her, but now wasn’t the time while I was still buried inside of her. I kissed her neck and across her jaw.
“Are you hungry yet? For food… I mean.” I cocked my eyebrow and added a smirk, trying to move past any awkwardness from my premature declaration. Good job, Tom. Awesome.
“I’m starving.” She grinned with a heavily sated gleam in her eye. God, she was gorgeous.
Much to my dismay, we both got up and put our clothes back on. I enjoyed looking at my water goddess in her natural form. She remained barefoot, though, which was still hot as hell. I led her over to the table I had prepared for us to share outside. I pulled out her chair so she could sit down. The pot roast was still warm, and I made us both a plate of pot roast, potatoes, and carrots. To complete the feast, I poured each of us a glass of red wine, topping off our evening under the night sky. We easily rolled into conversation, enjoying our meal. After we were finished, I refilled our wine glasses and led her over to other side of the deck to sit in front of the fire pit. She snuggled up under my arm, and I kissed the top of her head, memorizing her scent of lavender. I just needed her to talk to me.
“Jordan?”
“Yes, cowboy?” she whispered so sweetly. I steeled myself for any impending backlash for prying, but if I was in the process of giving her my whole heart, I had to know.
“Will you tell me what he did to you?”
As soon as I asked the question, she tensed up, freezing in place. I shifted my arm from around her so I could look into her eyes.
“Baby, I know something happened, and I hope someday you’ll allow me in here,” I said as I placed my hand over her heart. “You already know how I feel about you. I’m not asking you to return the words, but I want to be able to call you mine.” I sighed, looking straight into the fire. “And I need to know what that bastard did to you.”
Thankfully, I had already set my glass down, because with the way I was clenching my fist, I would have broken it. I glanced up into her eyes, begging her to talk to me. She nodded as she set her wine down and scooted around out of my arms in order to face me straight on.
“I was engaged to Ryan. I had dated him for exactly a year.” She paused for a breath. “We… ended three months ago.”
“Why did you end things, Jordan?” I asked with concern.
She took another deep breath. I grabbed her hands, holding them tightly.
“Three months before our wedding I came home early to surprise him, and he was… with someone else.”
I looked away. I hurt for her. I was glad that bastard was out of her life, but I hated to think of what her heart went through.
Wait…
“Baby, doing the math… when was your wedding day supposed to be?”
She stilled in my hands and looked at me.
“I didn’t even realize…”
I thought she would be crushed, but she actually smiled and wrapped her arms around me.
“You made me forget. It was today. You made me forget.”
I hugged her back and smiled to myself. She let me help her forget, and that meant more than anything.
“There’s more, though, and this is something I need to tell you because you’re in my life now,” she said with a serious look.
I nodded and said, “Go on. I want you to tell me everything.”
She took another deep breath. “He was calling and texting… threatening me. Before I decided to move here, he… he almost forced himself on me, and he would’ve had my best friend not prevented it.”
My blood boiled as my teeth clenched. “Is he still in contact with you?”
She shook her head. “That’s why I got a new phone number. Only you, Katherine, my parents, and Ellie know my number, besides the college, of course.”
“You make sure you stay up front with me if he tries to contact you again. Okay? I’ll never let anything happen to you.” I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her. My heart clenched, knowing how bad it must have been for her. In time, I would let her explain more, but for now, I had heard enough.
“It’s getting kind of cool. Do you want to go back inside?” I started getting to my feet.
“Before we go, I want to be honest with you.” She held my hand, keeping me in my seat.
My heart pounded as my nerves buzzed. I knew I scared her. I threaded my fingers through hers and whispered, “You can talk to me about anything, Jordan.”
She scooted closer to me and caressed the side of my face. I closed my eyes, dipping my head into her hand. When I opened them, her face was so close to mine. How did she make me so weak? And I didn’t even care. She had a look in her eyes, but I couldn’t tell what kind it was.
“I was only intending to stay here for one semester, but with everything between us…” She exhaled, looking down, and then found my eyes again. “I’m almost there. Just don’t give up on me, okay?”
I gazed on her with hope, nodding my comprehension because I had no words. That was almost as good as her saying that she loved me. I leaned in, stealing her lips. They would be mine forever.
THE CHILL OF the early fall air brought us back inside after our shared dinner and my feast of a cowboy. Hampton stretched as he stood from his blanket that lay in between the kitchen and the living room, and he followed the smell of the leftover pot roast that Tom carried inside. He fed Hampton while I put the dishes and the wine glasses in the sink. For good measure, I washed them while he p
ut the leftover pot roast in the fridge. My mind reeled as I soaped up the plates and the glasses.
In such a short amount of time, it was almost as if my soul knew what my brain kept shutting down. He wanted to be with me. He wanted an “us.” I just didn’t know if I could trust my heart again. It had really screwed me over the last time I went through this, but I wanted to trust it again.
I dried my hands with a kitchen towel and laid it next to the sink. A calming warmth spread through me at the ease of doing the simple task of washing his dishes. It made me feel like I belonged. With my hip resting against the countertop, I admired the view as he bent over to make room in the fridge. I didn’t think I would ever get tired of the way his ass looked in jeans. The wall around my heart kept breaking bit by bit. It was so easy to fall.
When he closed the door to the fridge and turned around, I could see he had caught me staring. His eyebrow lifted in amusement as a smirk eased up his cheek. I bit my lip, but not from shyness. It was from hunger. He pushed away from the door, closing the distance between us. He lifted his hand up and dragged the back of it down my face. I closed my eyes, absorbing his touch. His thumb grazed across my lip, releasing it from its bite. My eyes flickered open, the love exuding from his blue depths. I told my head to trust my heart. It was okay to fall.
He slowly pressed his lips to mine, kissing me tenderly, and gently sucking my bottom lip. He coddled my face inside of his hands as his heart spoke to mine. It was too soon.
Without breaking our kiss, he leaned down, scooped me into his arms and carried me out of the kitchen and through the living room. When we reached the base of the stairs, he still didn’t break our kiss and carefully carried me up each step.
As we entered a room, he pecked me one more time and set me on my feet. He stood in front of me, interlocking our fingers, and whispered, “I have one more little surprise for you.”
“Do I have to close my eyes for this one?” I cocked my head to the side with a hint of humor. His eyes lit up with his smile
“No, but stay in here for just a minute.” He wrapped his fingers around my head and kissed my forehead. With a smile, he slipped away from me and into the bathroom.
The room around me held the same richness as the living room. The walls were painted the same natural khaki and dark wooden wainscoting layered over the bottom half of the wall. An overstuffed leather chair sat nestled in the corner with a reading lamp and a table beside it. Curiosity took over as I walked over to the table to peek at the book resting on top. The front of it faced the table. I lifted it up to see that he was in the middle of reading Lonesome Dove. I couldn’t help but smile at my cowboy. I lay it back on the table and turned to face the king size bed. The headboard was covered in the same brown leather as the chair in the corner, with a neutral coverlet on the bed.
A pair of dark walnut nightstands flanked the bed, each holding a lamp, but on the far nightstand, a picture rested underneath the light. I crossed around to the other side of the bed, and after studying the dated picture for a moment, I picked up the photo of a couple and a young boy. Tom had come back into the room, but I didn’t try to hide that I was snooping. He was in love with me, and my heart needed to get to know him if I was ever going to let him in.
“What were their names?” I glanced up at him as a small smile eased up his face.
“Thomas and Susanna.”
I set the picture down and walked back around the bed, wrapping my arms around his waist.
“Are you a junior, then?”
He shook his head, pulling me into a warm embrace.
“Our middle names are different. His is Douglas, and mine is Everett after my grandfather.”
“Oh, that’s what the ‘E’ stands for.” As he looked at me in puzzlement, I smiled and continued, “Your initials are on your tool bag. Remember? The one you dropped when you were perving on me?”
He laughed. “Yeah, I was perving on you, wasn’t I?”
“Just a tad.” For a moment, we gazed into each other’s eyes. I didn’t understand how it had happened, but I was determined not to ruin what was going on between us. He nuzzled his face in the crook of my neck, kissing down to my collar bone, and peeled away my sweater.
“Well, I’m still waiting to see my water goddess.” He kissed a little more, pulling me along with him toward the door he had just gone into. “And I said your next bubble bath wouldn’t be alone.” He pulled the shirt over my head. “So, will you join me?”
The twinkling effect carried over from our outdoor dinner. With the lights turned off, the bathroom glowed with what looked like hundreds of votive candles surrounding a huge jetted bathtub filled with bubbles, of course. My mouth dropped open in awe as moisture dripped down my cheeks. His thumbs swept over them, wiping my tears away.
“Darlin’,” he whispered, “don’t cry.”
“You don’t have to work so hard. I want to be with you.” I shook my head and wrapped my arms around his waist, resting my head against his chest.
“I want to do this for you. It’s because I care for you, Jordan. I want to treat you the way you should be treated. You are an amazing woman, and I’m in love with you.” He looked into my glazed eyes. “This is nothing like what I’ll do when we get to forever. And I plan to, Jordan.” He leaned in close, giving me one more peck, and a silly grin rose up his cheeks. “Let’s go, lady. Strip. We have bubbles waiting for us.”
I laughed and obeyed his command. He stepped in first and held his hands out for me to hold onto. I eased down into the soothing bubbles, and I leaned my back against his chest. His arms wrapped around me, holding me close. For the first time since I had left Charlotte, I felt complete. I felt protected. I just hoped nothing would happen to ruin this feeling. Our fingers intertwined, my arms wrapping with his. In my state of contentment, I broke the silence that hung in the air.
“Where do you want to be in five years?”
He kissed my cheek and my neck.
“Doing exactly what I’m doing now… sitting in a bubble bath with my arms and legs wrapped around my girl.” His gruff voice aroused me as his breath tickled my neck. He resumed kissing my cheek and down the side of my neck, and I let out a moan. How could one man’s kiss have this effect on me? I turned my head toward his chest and closed my eyes. The drumming of his heart soothed the unsure clatter of mine. My heart wanted to put itself out there for his to take. Soon.
Before I knew it, he lifted me out of the tub as I was dead to the world. He dried me off with a warm, oversized towel. He picked me up again, carrying me out of the bathroom, and laid me down on his bed. He scooted in behind me, planting kisses on my shoulder.
“I’m sorry I fell asleep,” I whispered into the darkness of the night. He leaned up behind me and I turned my face, meeting his. The moonlight from the window sparkled in his eyes.
“The only thing better than you falling asleep in my arms is you waking up in my arms.”
As my eyes fluttered closed, a weight lifted off my chest. I knew within that moment that I was falling in love with Tom.
• • •
I awoke the next morning feeling completely and utterly loved and in love. My cowboy’s arms wrapped tight around me as he was still out cold. Something was wide awake, though, and standing at attention, poking the back of my thigh. I nudged Tom over onto his back and decided that he needed to be properly woken up.
I slowly and quietly scooted my way down the bed until I found him pulsing at attention. After lightly licking the pearl essence from the tip, I proceeded to lightly suck and lick all over his engorged head. He hummed in anticipating appreciation and I smiled. I started taking him ever so slowly in my mouth as far down as I could and made my way back up. He called my name in a whisper, but he was still asleep. I continued my assault on him as I heard him gasp and throw back the covers.
“Oh my God, baby, what are you doing?”
I gazed upon him with a sexy smile.
“Telling you good morning.” I
didn’t hold back any longer; he began to buck under me.
“Jordan, baby, you don’t have to do this,” he panted.
I gazed up at him, slowly keeping the rhythm with my hand.
“Oh, but I want to.”
Keeping my eyes locked on his, I started to lick up his length, holding him in my hand. He finally moaned and wove his fingers through my hair. I resumed the dive, massaging him the whole time.
“Oh God, baby… holy shit …”
I continued using my hand to guide further down while my lips sucked him at the tip. He tried to tug me back.
“Baby, stop, I’m going to come.”
I ignored him and laid my hand on his chest as I continued working him in my mouth. He grunted again and thrust back into my mouth. I started working faster as his breathing became more rapid.
“Oh, shit, baby.” He hardened and throbbed as he grunted. His body tensed as he came, filling up my mouth and down my throat. I licked off the remnants and swallowed. I crawled back up his body and he grabbed my elbows and guided me up to his face, kissing me passionately.
While straddling him, I kissed him the way any woman would kiss the man that they loved. I needed to tell him. I didn’t care that it had been only a week. I needed to tell him, even though it scared the hell out of me. Pulling out of the kiss, I gazed into his eyes, getting his undivided attention. I took a calming breath and willed my voice to be steady.
“I love you.”
His face blanked in shock, his eyes popping open. He exhaled a breath as his eyes relaxed and all of the tension melted from his body.
“Are you sure, Jordan?”
A smile eased up my face. I bit my lip and nodded my answer.
As he coddled my face, he brought my lips down to his, and he kissed me with more love and affection than I had ever felt before. Pulling away slightly to look into my eyes, he whispered, “I promise to make you happy and never let you down, Jordan. I love you so much.”
